(2008/06) June 2008

<font color="aa00aa">cactus, you're right! Duty of discipline shld be from parent, tats wat i told my hubby oso. We cannot rely on our parent on such issue.
However, as long as our parent/ IL does not interfere too much in our discipline, then it wont be much problem.</font>
 


Ellyisa,
hmm...cos yest i find her moving alot, today like din move much wor...duno whether she engaged yet also..yest gynae says she not yet engaged..
 
Felicia, not only must our parent/IL not interfere with our discipline, but we must make sure there is consistency in the discipline. but it is very hard to control who our kids come into contact with during the course of the day.

Take my nephew's case. He is turning 3 soon. My FIL spoils him rotten. will give him icecream and sweets just before he is due to have his dinner. so he doesn't show interest in his food. then my MIL brings him out during the day to her friends' homes.. and her friends spoil him also.. how to control this type??
 
cactus, hmm... but i think if it is our own parents it is gg to be much easier to talk. Its definitely gg to be challenging at times but i guess once we are able to eastablish some common understanding and boundary of the different roles, things should be more managable. Dun nd to be headache now.
 
cactus, I understand, but when your son reach a certain learning age, more or less your dad will volutary teach him. I met a mummy whose gal was slow in speaking. After she joined Seimpi Music Class with my son, her gal picked up talking. And from there, this mummy's mother, who is taking care of her grand daughter, teach her volutary in maths and english, now she is quite advance in her nursery class. So I believe your dad will sure help you when time comes.
 
actually, if my dad and mom can't look after our bb well, without souring my relationship with my parents, then the only way out if for me to stop working and look after bb myself... cos I believe first few years of bb's life is teh most important..
 
cactus,

I been reading a lot of relationship books before i met my hb (cos my love life isn't tat smooth in the past and encountered few failed rs so i decided to learn more), which I also learn to discuss certain impt things with partner before entering marriage &amp; having a kid.

Certain things have to be discussed and agree upon before things come. But of course must always allow flexibility to change mind accordingly when things change.

Like my hb family is a more traditional thinking than mine.. they have this thinking that once married, the daughter in law is theirs and shd committed to their family and husband shd be the lead voice. My IL family will visit FIL parents first on any occasion and also every week they will go to FIL's mum house.

So my hb expect me to also follow suit, to go to his mother house every week. Then my mum is opposite as u know her rs with MIl is not good so my family only visited maternal grandma ONCE A YEAR. How to adapt to a every week duty i cannot imagine lah.

Anyway so before marriage, i ored tell hb i will not go every week. He ask me wat reason and i say no reason lor, i dun feel like it and i am not used to a per week basis. But my hb want to visit his mum every week being a dutiful son and his mum also make sure he goes every week or else he get nagging. So in end our compromise is he goes back every week and i only accompany him on fornightly.

But though on certain occasions when i feel upset abt any MIL remarks wat i do is i will go back once every 3 weeks instead of fornightly..
of course hb not happy but he can't do much.. becos i say if i go back on unhappy mood even worst, i may end up quarrel then he also dun want right..

But i guess this "honeymoon" going to diminish soon bec next time i have to go back every weekday to fetch my bb lor, hb wanted to fetch bb back everyday.

tats is also why i intend to send kid to CC as soon as he can attend.. can't imagine everyday travel to MIL house.

Heng i never agree to hb's suggestion to buy a house near my MIL house.. bec now my hb sometimes also find ley chey to travel to MIL house so he oso try to "escape" some persuasion to go back more than necessary.
 
cactus,

WHO knows when yr dad take care of yr kid for some time then he grows tired too? Cos now he is old liao not like last time when he is young he can take care of u well.

Dun worry so much, when things come then react accordingly. worry too early also no use.
 
Veniz...
i cant be the bad guy oso... cos if i am, my son has no one to turn to for comfort after kena scolding/caning. Yes... we cane our son. i dun believe in sparing the rod.
 
feifei,

If engaged u will feel bb pushing downwards to yr V area and going down..

then 1-2 days later u find tat yr tummy shape change (pls observe yr tummy shape frequently then u can spot the changes), as bb descend yr tummy gets "lower" where the "sharp point" is lower.
 
Ellysia, yeah.. I'm so scared later my dad don't want to look after our bb.. sigh!!! Cos apart from my dad, no other option already. ILs cannot look after. Left my dad. my mom can only look after in 4 years' time! The deal I struck with my dad is we'll get a maid to help him full-time. I will look after bb at night myself. Will work part-time indefinately (work in the afternoons only).. and if I return to full-time work, I will work from home once a fortnight so that he can go out and do his thing. so far, he said okay..
 
Ellysia, thanks for the tips on what happens when bb engages. cos my next appointment is only in 2 weeks' time. close to 37 weeks by then...
 
cactus,

Yup marriage prep course is v good. i wanted to attend but was v busy preparing wedding tat time so we didnt go.

In the end i try to find articles and send them to my hb to read
happy.gif
 
cactus,
i agree on consistency in disciplining kids. sometimes, i see my neice very naughty and when scolded, she will start crying, i believe in ignoring her and giving her time-out to calm down then after that will talk to her and explain what she did wrong. But my mum will immediately sayang her when she cries which will send very conflicting signals to her.
sad.gif


dun worry too much, just ride it out when the time comes. your arrangement sounds quite good to me.
happy.gif
at least u will work part-time and can get to spend time with bb.
 
cactus,

Same here! If my MIL dun want to take care, i can't imagine my mum do it cos my mum is strapped with my bro who still under depression so not ideal to take care of my bb though if i force my mum she can help but its a last resort thing.

But no use worrying.. seriously worst come to worst have to send kid to CC also bo piang.. but most impt is there must be someone reliable to take care of our kid until 18mths so tat at least the teething stage is over.
 
Soyabean, me also like you, can't spare the rod sometimes, but really, very seldom beat my son. When I scolded him, he has no one to turn to, he will come back to me for comfort. He does know I love him and sometimes we have to use hard methods to teach him, and yet he is not happy being beaten as its painful for him.
 
Oh feifei, I forgot tell you, my cousin, who is one of the assistants in KKH private suite, told me that KKH also dun sell Dale Binder, and she also said after we give birth, gynae and nurse will determine our size and get the correct size of binder for us. Most binders are good and comparable, thus we dun really have to standby one first. Hope this helps.
 
Veniz,
I also forgot to tell u wor, i went to TMC pharmacy again yest, they dun sell e DALE binder liao, now they selling another brand, also at $59 with different sizes wor...The lasy was telling me, to buy only after i delivered so that can get e correct size...Tks ger, tink i will wait lor.. =D...

Hope my bb can come out soon =D.
 
<font color="ff6000">shycloud

i ma chiam rotting in office already leh!!

*update abt roxy*

today her painkiller is wearing off den now start to feel the effect of the wound but she is off drip n urine bag so feeling better
happy.gif
</font>
 
yeh.. this wkend mus do some clearing n cleaning liao.. too many things lying ard.. mus pack my hospital bag by this wkend!
 
<font color="aa00aa">I'm still waiting for my hubby to come back and accompany me to my check up. So tiring waiting, coz i'm very anxious to see my bb. heehee......</font>
 
babycupid,
u haven packed ur hospital bag?

shycloud,
wat happen?

morraine,
tks for e updates on roxy...poor ger, the wound must be pain pain...
 
<font color="ff6000">shycloud

wahahahah u are doing exactly wat im doing too!! *lol*

babycupid

pack bag arh.... i oso haven pack... when is ur edd?

feifei

c sect sure more painful and longer route to recovery compared to natural one
sad.gif
</font>
 
pack bag :last night took out a bag, empty whats inside, but just put my daily disposable contact lens &amp; a few plastic bags inside
 
soyabean
ya my hubby has warned me against interfering when he disciplines he says he will discipline me as well if i try to stop him haha

cactus
staying at my hubby's place is out of the question cos there's no more extra space for another bb. His parents and sister stays in that flat so no extra room for bb's cot or stuff. And also my MIL has kept reminding us that she wun help to look after (which i also secretly very glad haha). If we were to bring bb back to my hubby's place, then only way out is bb sleeps on the bed with me and hubby sleeps on the floor haha. Our arrangement for now is if he can make it then he try to come over and stay with me on certain nights. But I'm not sure if he can get used to staying my mum's place cos at home he is like a king i dunno if my parents will treat him as king in their house haha

Anyway my hubby flys alot so he wun have much time to spend with bb as well. In fact he's in china for a week already and will only be back tonight.

But my mum was really kind enough to give up her master bedroom to me and my bb so I am really grateful to her also

Veniz
last time i try to make it a point to chat with my MIL but after one incident which she really pissed me off i stopped to make small talk with her anymore. Really can't stand her sometimes. If I tell you all her stories think you all will vomit blood also.
 
feifei..
bcos some of u gals bb already engaged..how i wish mine was! she still pretty high up in my tummy although her head is down...sigh

just msg my hb tat im feeling moody going into depression soon...lol
 
Aiyo, you all so moody, Friday mood. this morning I still thinking of coming back on Monday to work, then later on realise ya hor, Monday holiday. Think my brain a bit slow in morning liao.
 
<font color="ff6000">fennie

oic ha ha its super fun!

shycloud

dun worry la.. i join u.. my boy oso haven engaged den my gynae said #2 usually dun engaged so fast</font>
 
morr,
i dunno leh, very sian, see maybe i'll do it over the weekend, just hope bb will not come early this time

feifei,
yes, alot more to pack
 
morr...
me just waiting for lunch time to come ;p

fennie...
me playing wahjong in viwawa too! come form a group leh...

anyone out there interested? lol
 
Aiyo Babycupid you haven't pack hospital bag yet! haha

Fennie, you stay hospital still want to wear disposable contacts? Wun be troublesome meh?
 

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