pixie
okok, kam sia ah!
As for X's recent development, i reckon it's call "testing your limits and boundaries". He's reaching an emotional maturity. Our kids at this age, we no longer SEE them developing (other than growing taller of cos) cos from here on, it's all in the brain. We will NEVER know for sure what's going on in that little brain of theirs and we also can't compare cos every child develops differently at different stage, jus like when one can crawl, the other can stand faster way back when they were babies, rem? So it doesnt mean X throw tantrum now testing limits, and others don't doesnt mean X is maturing or others not. Aiyah, very complicated. But most importantly, we as the parents need to stand firm and know our own rules that we set for them and be consistent. Got to keep cool when they do these stunts lo. ie throw himself on the floor. Grit ur teeth and thicken ur skin. After a while, he should learn he cant push the limits and that rules are rules so he'll revert back? It's tough on u now cos ur preggie and all, but hang in there bah?
Rylee also is a handful, always testing my limits, always curious, dismantling things etc. Sometimes it gets the better of me too. And i will yell at her big time. But aft that i will regret also. For scaring her cos scaring is definitely not the right way to discipline. I scold, scare, threaten, bribe, everything also tried before, my mantra is "whatever gets me thru the day" when i'm feeling really really ultra low and stressed. Sometimes also think maybe i'm a bad mother compare to others, thats why my girl so naughty? Haha, but that's not true lah. Rylee's school teachers say she's a very curious child, so i TRY to see the good side of it, probably only when she grows up? Hahahaha. But one POV the teachers cautioned is, whatever form of disciplining method u use, as and when u change it, be expected to have the behaviour worsened before it gets better. Like if ur used to yelling, then suddenly u decide i will not yell anymore and "lun", u wont see the child suddenly "gets it" and be a better kid, he/she will test ur limits and patience more before understanding. Know what i mean?
At the end of the day, for me, dealing with Rylee always drains my energy out. So i always tell myself i "have to pick my battles" ie those not so important i will let it slide a bit, but those very important i will insist. And i think rylee knows that now.
Avoid meltdowns by picking ur battles. Tats not to say ur letting him having his way, but well, just letting him THINK he can have his way but on your terms. Usually i'd jus shrug and let Rylee choose, take it or leave it. But when u need to say no to something u die die wont let him, be sure to offer an alternative that u know he wont resist. Always offer a rejection like "We cant eat the cake now, BUT how about i let u pick a cartoon to watch for 20mins" so it sort of sweetened the rejection. Works for Rylee lah. Now she always try to "counter offer" by saying "how about this" to me too! LOL.
Hope it helps...pardon my cheong hei-ness
