(2006/10) OCTOBER 2006 MTB

Coral, Doreen, Jo
Really glad I met you all and of course, Char and Damien. Pretty good catch-up - Coral, you should have join us!

esther mummy
I agree with what you say but I also secretly harbor thoughts of wishing for a boy. IN fact, I so wanted Alexis to be one I named her Aidan (before I knew the sex) and was quite crushed and pissed when the detailed scan shows a girl but now I am really happy with her and would not wish it any other way. Having said that, I will still hope the next one (if I am blessed with one) to be a little Aidan...
 


<font color="0000ff">esther</font> what is wrong with you. you ok? call me if you need to talk hor. sayang. actually i have same feeling as you. i rather GOD take me first as i dun wanna b the one to witness any of their departure cos i dunno if i can take it emotionally.

actually i cried on the bus today too. went for interview n the outcome quite promising but when i saw Caleb's pix on my mobile, i started tearing cos if i really accept this new job, i will have less time for him n i really will miss it so now super dilemma cos it doubles what i getting now. with Caleb & the car, our finances quite tight now so tis job will help lessen our burden n hopefully i can save enf to b SAHM when #2 comes along.

<font color="ff6000">Separation Anxiety & New Job Opportunity</font>
<font color="ff6000">think i kanna separation anxiety. esp so when with ILs. i agree with crystallized tt the over whelming attention on Caleb is driving me crazy every time at IL's place cos my side my sis n BIL n bro n SIL not like that. everytime MIL wanna carry Caleb i have this feeling that she is snatching him away from me n i hate that feeling.

some mummies are right too that i dun like ILs that's y whatever they do i dun like. like jenny said every lil things they do or remarks makes me mad or furious. FIL can only say "Ang Gu" to Caleb n he has way outgrown this verse but he has nothing else to say except tis. so annoying to hear tt.

now that i have a new job opportunity, i really have greater fears esp the job requires travelling n i really scared hb will end up bringing Caleb back to IL's place everyday during my absence n the thought of this really scares me.

i asked mum today if i can trust Caleb to her if i were to accept tis new job cos otherwise i wont have peace of mind n very glad mum agreed but on days when she has to work, we will put Caleb in infantcare at hb's office which is managed by my old neighbour. at least i know she will look out for Caleb cos she watched sis, me & bro grow up.

sorry for this super long winded post but i really need to let it out cos i'm now tearing in front of my laptop while typing this. see lah, have also worry, dun have also worry. dunno what i want. btw i didnt go search for the job, i came knocking n i really didnt expect things to move so fast until now i abit taken aback n dunno how to react.

can i know how all you mummies working full time manage your time from work & bb? cos now tho m supposed to be FTWM but i worked at home most time so i really cannot fully comprehend and also my timing quite flexi now.</font>

<font color="0000ff">wei kuan</font> looking at your schedule really scares me more if i take the new job.

<font color="0000ff">crystallized</font> dunno if i kana PND too. but after so long still possible right?
 
here to share a funnie pix my mum took tis morning. see he so damn tired.
732245.jpg
 
selina
i understand ur dilema, actually i have the same prob...

although my hb giving me allowance but i still feel bad for not being able give my parents since im not working so now looking for job but i also dun really bear to leave ted.

Many options comes to our minds but as what u say, i dun dare to let my IL look after, tink u knw y.if i hire maid i also worry that IL will pop by often to meddle with my hse. i dun really agree to their bringing up method too

i can't really put in infant care cos its full and there is long waiting list.recently when i go over to IL hse, my MIL will carry ted over and went downstairs alone with ted. i always worry if she says those bad tings infront of ted , ted always come back crying.

Frankily speaking if i really can dun go out to work, i would prefer to look after ted myself.Yes its tiring but i cannot imagine what other people will teach/do to ted , be it maid, caregiver or parents/IL..
 
btw share someting funny

tis morning im really tired and wanted to nap...but my boy just dun wan to take his usual 9+/10am nap...i pat him do everyting i can till 11+....then last resort i use the same old but effective method: Handkerchef game

i put ted on bed, i slp beside him and use a handkerchef keep swinging up and down for him to catch, but im actually sleeping...hehehethe next moment i open my eyes, he catch until he fall asleep too beside me...hahaha he must be looking at the swinging handkerchef until blur liao then doze off
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MummyToBabyCaleb
First of all, huge congrats on getting a new job. Maybe I can share with you what happen with me a couple of months back...I went for an interview and was offered the job (full time) on the spot: excellent prospects in every sense, from good money to wonderful fringe benefits, from great career development to terrific mentor. I deliberated for a week (the amt of time given to me) and was very agonised. Should I take it? But if I do, I cannot watch Alexis take her first step or say her first word, etc. I listed down pros and cons and talked to several friends and hubby. In the end, decided not to take up offer and stay put in my part time job, which obviously has not as many perks as the full time position. However I am really glad I decided to do so as I am experiencing being a mom with Alexis and loving every second of it. Rather go travel to nearby countries, buy fewer stuff and spend less than miss Alexis's yawns and hugs!
 
ESTHER
Why u talk like that?? U not happy today I never bring u out aah??
Hehehehehe. Yah hor forget to ask u join us today. Why U also never join us??
Me also same thinking like U I rather be the one to "go" first but then I worry about hubby n D cannot cope......sigh I worry got reason 1 next time tell U.
But then not good to keep thinking right? SO dun think bad things lah. What will be will be think liao also cannot change anything right??
So might as well live happily n have no regrets.
 
<font size="+2">EVER SEEN HOW BABIES FIGHT??</font>
Thanks to jerene I dun even know I didn't catch the fight shots....n there was a lot of screaming btw.....hehehe

732296.jpg
 
selina,
you are not alone. i've been dealing with such dilemma eversince Joshua came along.

On one hand, i want to be around for my kids but on the other hand, i miss the mental stimulation and the social interaction at work.

Just like my current decision to stay at home, it was more because the maid can't cope with 2 kids and the demands of my work is getting heavier that i took the easier way out to stay at home. i could have asked my MIL to come over to help the maid on certain days. But like you, i have issues over how she will handle the kids.

Although i have 9 mths more to decide what to do when my no pay leave ends, i've been constantly thinking about what i will do when the time comes. And i'm thinking of changing work environment when i'm ready to start work (since the current one is really stressful), so each time hubby comes across a job opportunity that he thinks will interest me, he'll ask me to apply. But i'm hesitating cos what if i really get the job? Will i accept it? So i can totally under how u feel now.

Of course, having more money is good. Ideally i would prefer to work now to save more money and only stop work when the kids start school. I've worked more years than you and built up my savings before I had Joshua. But it would be better if i could fully save my salary and just live on hubby's salary. Life will definitely be more comfortable.

Actually your current situation is quite good. you have a job and get to spend time with C as well. I would love to have a job like that. Maybe because i've worked so long already that i'm a quite jaded. I just need a job to keep me adequately challenged. No need to climb corporate ladder or look for very well paid one.
But you may be different cos you're younger and are looking for greater challenges. And of course being paid higher is a major plus.

Looks like i'm not helping much. But just thought of sharing with you my own thoughts.
 
Vivian
U VERY BAD aah.......me decided not to buy already cos the size I want is the small strap 1 n looks cheap leh. Even thought I dun mind the pirata design it doesn't come in the size I want.
But if U buy hor.....I WANNA SEE!!!!!
Very tempted to buy a fake one cos only $30+ but then........why buy a fake when I have nice n real bags hor.....hehe

<font size="-2">Last sentence is more for the benefit of my hubby......hehehehe</font>
 
doreen,
DONT buy the fake ones! Can tell that it's fake one, not worth it! Ya lor, why carry a fake one when u have other real ones.
Vivian already bought the diaper bag in angel print
happy.gif
 
jasmine,
forgot to reply you.
i only intend to start Emma on solids when she turns 6 mths old, that's about 3 weeks time. But this time i probably wont be making frozen cubes cos i can share it with Joshua.
 
Selina
*sayang sayang*

Babygrace
Well said!! I am like you, i save all my S$ during my property days for my kids in future and live on HB!! Though i never told HB how much i have in my bank account .That's part of the reason why i chose to be a SAHM now. <font color="0000ff">Selina</font> i agree w bbgrace that higher pay is a major plus as the standard of living now is getting higher and higher!! Having said, the decision on whether to take up the offer really lies within you..cos no one knows better than yourself what is it that you want for not only yrself but yr family!!However whatever decision you made at the end of the day, we all here will support you mentally de
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Doreen
U gonna make my night
biggrin.gif
cos the way u posted so funnie! I know today you got Sep gathering mah! Not bcos of you never 'jio' me lah..just that i'ved been thinking so much so that i.....haiz dun wana say le!!
 
I bought this for Damien just now. Isn't it cool??.....hehehe
Can't resist.
732315.jpg


btw my MIL came back from HK n she bought D a disney big toy dog that costs bout SGD$60.
AND SHE DIDN"T GET ANYTHING FOR ME!!!
<font size="-2">But okie lah cos her taste not good n I never like the things she buy...hehehe</font>
But she could have gotten me anything from Disneyland ma...sigh
 
Esther
U KNS invisible aah how come MSN cannot see u 1

John little sale hor machiam like no sale leh go also not suang 1. N u gals know what. AFter we parted ways I went Robinsons to "wait" for hubby to come fetch me. End up bought the above toy n a few other things spend nearly $200....hahahaha
N I bought the cube toy from robinson at $13+. It was selling at JL n Isetan for $19.90.
 
Doreen
Dont expect anything from them lah..tell you what hor my MIL 'ARGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH' recently during Christmas period she came back from Taiwan wif those auntiessss..guess what..she bought J some TW clothing (i am fine) but this MIL of mine bought me a Lesportsac bag at night bazzar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I kept in the store and its been collecting dust for 4months liao i dun even wanna take a look at it lor cos dam LC lor.. How much u bought that for D?
 
Jerene
Dun mind hor.....hehe
Post until poor Alexis machiam pervert like that....hahaha
But can't resist the photos leh so funny!!!
 
Selina,
For me, why I am working now is becos I want to have benefits like 3mths maternity, free antenatal, free delivery etc during my second pregnancy etc and most impt is to save enough $ so that after second birth can SAH for a 18mths. by that time can put R in playgroup liao cos 2yrs old liao mah
By that time also no need to make frozen cubes for the second child cos can share with R.
I have plan long time ago so was okay with my schedule now although a little sin ku.
You wony know till u try.
I was glad I put R in infant early (3ths old) as she very used to it and was happy. I do not have any separation anxiety when I put her in infantcare cos I went to see her every 2-3 hrs at work.
Like babygrace, MIL I have no comments cos only see them abt twice per yr. Nobody can help me so I have to take care of her myself. But with ur mother help, I think you will not be so worried.
I also been offer a higher paid job by my previous boss (also hospital) who now promoted to manager, but I decline cos the job I am doing now allow me to visit my R every now and then.
 
very tired, although I not working today, have to wake up so early to send R to infantcare. will pick her up early today.
I still have things to do and not logging in till weekend. selina, if u accept the new offer have to control the time u spent in forum like I do cos we must do our work fast in order not to do OT. I cannot offer to do any OT at all.
 
morning gals...

been busy the past 2 days...trying to run thro the posts..

selina..congrats on having a new job opportunity...i m seriously thinking of getting one new one as well....but i think prospects wise at the old place is there juz the pay!...sigh....

esther....cheer up my dear...

doreen...yr boy so cute!!..and how much you pay for the car?

oh yes...i haven got my Isetan barang barang yet!!!..jackie...will pass u the thermo next week cos the delivery is this friday ya.

my boy finally recovers from his flu....took his to TCM and the physician gave him the pearl powder to get rid of the phelgm...
 
Selina and Esther, I used to want to be the first to leave, but now, I wished to be the last to leave. Cos ater I experience the lost of Kaden, I know it's so heartbreakig, I dont want anyone at home to feel so sad for me. So I'll hope I can leave after hb so he wont hv to cry for me. And of course I hope God will be merciful enuf to let me go shortly after cos I do not wish to leave in misery for too long.

esther, hope you're Happy n Cheery today! HAPPY MUMMY= HAPPY BABY!

Selina, sayang sayang. I've been tearing since my boss spoke to me to hurry me into full time.Like you it's double the pay and more....But very very she3 bu4 de2 our bbs rite? I'm also half hearted...But at least you can still stya put in current job, for me, if I dont want full time, it'll mean I can only parttime till June then jobless. Hb can afford to raise our own family, ut my parents and brother depend on me. Over the last 2 yrs I already used up my savings on them, since i've not worked full time for about a year and also gien up all bouns cos I quit...Guess that's why I've also lost my cheong attitude for Sales. So now I cherish even the time when Char wake up to feed in teh middle of the nite. I wish to say I can live without much money, but practical world dont allow so lor. I'm a mother but at the same tiem a daughter and sister too. Sometimes I'm angry with my parents for being so dependent on me, but when I think of how they raise and love me, I know I have to do something for them too.
sad.gif


Gender of BB
==========
I had always been happy with any gender, but was hoping for a boy when I was preg with Char cos I was hoping that she could be Kaden reborn into our family again...Then I realise I'm so selfish and bad to want to take her as a subsitute of her brother...And during preg her behaviour in my tummy was so different form Kaden, I then relaise they are different and she's another one of my Darling withy her own personality and not anyone's subsitute. After she's born she looks so much like her brother, I get lots of consolation from her and I love her so much too.

WeiKuan, at least you can look forward to next bb and rest for 18mths. I cant and feel so frustrated cos my heart is with my bb and family bt I hv to force myslef to go out and work...I can never save enuf to stop working...

Aspialle, at least your parents dont expect you to give them allowance when you dont work. When I quit due to preg, I have to continue to give allowance and pay for expenses...very siong for me, so my savings very little now.
sad.gif
 
Jerene, just realise you stay in the east too. You're thinking of bringing Alexis for the trial music class? I think too early for Char now, will prob go when she's 6-8mths old. Will prob enrol her in My Gym at Parkway wheh she's older, maybe 8mths-1yr. N hey, you're also working part-time...I hope to extend my part-time contract if i can...
 
coral
actually i still give although she dun want me to give, so same as u my savings running low since i stop work since pregnant...all locked up in insurance.
u going to the pool gathering?
 
Selina,

Can understand your worries. Think you will need to weigh your pros and cons and what type of things you want to provide for your child.

For me, i cannot go without work and I am those type that cannot stay at home whole day to look after children 1(i know this is kind of bad but i just cant). I want to provide the best for my child hence by working i have my own income to spend.
As a full time working mum, of cos time apend with child will be lesser than SAHM but i will spend the whole of weekend with her.
As for learning stage, i will put her in child care centre for her to learn more things rather than MIL once she reach 18 months.
 
hihi selina

I can understand how you feel... am back to work just 3 weeks ago... everyday, i will go to my mum's place to see my boy and hubby will drive me back home ard 11.30pm.. throughout the day.. I miss my boy.. and will usually look at his video and photos on my camera.. as time pass by, am more used to it now.. will try to spend more time with me as much as i can after work and during the weekends..
 
coral
ur char looks more and more chubby n likable
my hb working on weekends too so have to find my own prog...see first, bring him out quite challenging all the way frm boon lay

hw cum ur family oppose to childcare???

seems that they oppose a lot of tings leh. so "kang kor"
 
Coral,

Why oppose?? they can learn more things...

A real life example will be my husband niece and nephew. the nephew(who is the eldest child and at that time his parent dont bear to let him go child care cos only child then ma) who is 8 yrs old liao, still want someone to dress him for school, feed him meals.. wa seh... really shame shame leh. whereas his yongest sister, my husband niece who went to child care at 18 months, know already how to dress, eat and toilet trained herself. Really... a big diff. they tends to be independance once they are at child care cos they are sort of "force" to do things themselves.
 
aiyoh wat happened ladies? juz overnight and i see so many of u overwhelmed wif sadness and thoughts.
sad.gif


Selina
yes, i think every now and then still can kena PND. 4 me, not tt i dun like my ILs but i juz cant explain the feeling when they r so overwhelming with the attn on R. my MIL treats me as well as she does to her daughter, but somehow i juz dun understd why i hv such feelings. sigh...

hmmm, i can understd the plus of the new job. i cant tell u wat to do but if i were u, i will definitely not take the job. yes, wif the xtra money u can do alot of things. but the money will nvr buy back the time u lose spending wif Caleb. i am a FTWM and everyday its crazy to shuttle to and fro home, work and my mum's plc. there r many times i need to attend nite mtgs and attend wkend events so all the more i treasure any moment wif R... so u really think to think abt ur priorities.
happy.gif


R's awake and i need to send him off to my mum's plc now. will log in fr work plc this aftn if i can afford the time. hang in there, ladies!
happy.gif
 
Hi Selina,
whether to take the new job, the decision is up to you. Like me, I'm a mother of 3 boys (age 7, 4 and the baby) and I'm full time working mother. Everyday I have to revise the sch work with my 1st boy, then play with my 2nd boy and also my baby, how I wish I can be a SAHM, then I can spend more time on each of them but think back, I have my own money to spend, I can contribute to the family and in the same time I can buy things for my kids so no choice I have to work. The weekend are the only time that I'm alone with 3 of them but I don't feel tired, I treasure the time spending with them. I'm lucky that my mum is willing to help me and she is alone taking care the 3 of them, I wanted to get a maid but she refused saying that it's an additional expenses for me. So everyday, during my office hours, as and when my boys think of me, they will call me or I will call them, talk to them... Don't think we only talk about sch work, we can talk all sort of things, his favourite cartoon show, toys etc..
I know my story don't help you much but if there is a choice which mother don't want to stay at home and take care of the children herself.

Hope you will feel better now, in this world now, standard of living is high, not all mothers can stay at home to take care of their children. Think careful and more important be happy, your baby don't want to see a unhappy mummy
kao_smile2.gif
 
Ladies,

My poor desiree is sick again... having cough with phlegm and doc say her lung also have.
yesterday has been a sleepless night for me, keep worrying that her phlegm will choke her since she dun know how to cough it out.

Glad that my hubby(I could not take leave since my boss not around) bring her to doc and some medicine are prescibe to dissolve the phelgm.

Hoefully she is fine after the medicine.
 
aspialle, delphine, cos they saw bbs falling ill easily, not properly bath, starved, etc lor

aspialle, thanks for your compliments. Char is more likeable now cos her social skills improved. Like yday, when Jo. n Doreen say shepretty gal she'll smile back in respond. not so smelly face liao. But think her chubs will go away soon at the rate she fast. Like yday, went out they saw how little she drak after 3+hrs, only suckle 2 times on me then refuse milk liao.
 
Just came back from market..happily sling J to market and bought pumpkins, cai xin, plain noodles,fishball!! Tonight gonna make Shrimp Noodle Soup! Hope i am back to my normal self today...Big eater me just ate nasi lemak, 4 chwee kuey and 2 you tiao now am so full sitting in front of the PC reading postings
biggrin.gif


Coral
C is soooo cuteee i hope the next round i send yr things to yr mum hse i get to see and touch her haha..btw u got anything not hurry to collect from lengleng i do have some loots though not yet arrive..as usual want me to collect from pebbles our gym? Hiak Hiak ..

Jereen
Nevertheless me too no doubt i know sex cannot be choose i still in discreetly pray that if i get pregnant my next will be a gal..and name her Jeanna and i close factory
lol.gif


Huijun
I agree with you, if i were you i rather work extra hard to avoid OT cos as a FTWM cannot afford to waste those precious time with our darlings!! Cos by the time reach back they are already asleep and lessen the bonding time..
 
Esther, u make me drool, tis morn rain so i confine to eating bread for bfast...i hv clothes with lengleng but only reach vpost, the cream we ordered n gym. ya would be glad if u can help.
happy.gif
can always ask my mum to let u in la. my mum more than happy to showcase Char. hahaha.
Agree on the no OT part, rather eat biscuit at desk to finish work than go hm late.
 
Coral
That day yr mum got ask me to go in but i saw C sleeping in Yaolan so better not disturb moreover J is inside the car sleeping too ..Dont say like that lah sure can help lah me supper nothing to do type since bcame a SAHM.. so must keep myself entertain with something else my imagination will run wild again
biggrin.gif
 
esther,
what a wonderful breakfast you have, I only have 2 pcs of roti prata. Btw, how you plan for your marketing and did you go marketing everyday?

delphine,
hope your Desiree is ok, did the doctor give her medicine for the phlegm? This kind of coughing will last a few day, be prepared to have a few days of sleepless night. Take care of yourself too.
 
Esther, when u think too much, come in here to chat lah. I usually try not to think of unhappy things cos i waqnt to be char's happy mummy so she can be happy bb.
happy.gif
Wow, your hb tonite got kou3 fu2 le!
 
coral, it is not true that at infantcare or childcare, bbs falling ill easily, not properly bath, starved, etc lor or else all childcare closed shop liao.
I find that child go childcare is not spoilt. Sorry to say this, I saw too many examples of spoilt kids taken care by mother or MIL.


esther,
by the time reach home,(I going home with R together, come to work also with her) not she sleeping. Is I have to cook, feed, wipe her and let her sleep by 8pm plus. U know all these together take a few hrs rite. So my dinner and bath is always delay very late. That y a car is a MUST for me to reach hm early after wk. But I am HAPPY despite all these. I did not do any OT for the pass 3mths liao and my boss support that.

Selina,
Dun scared of my schedule lar.
Ur mum most likely will cook and feed Caleb when u reach home from work, so not that bad.
 
Littlekid/Coral/Esther,

Haiz.. think it's bacause my husband's niece and nephew lor... one gets better, the others get sick. I am sort of getting used to it liao.
Hopefully she is fine.

Coral,
one thing i must agree is they get sick easily when in child care centre, so need to build up your child antibodies. C really very chubby and adorable.. See your C always made me think of my Desiree weight... haiz.. just now weigh only 6.5kg.
 


Littlekid, mum did. Actually, tis is ascarf-like one to tie on head, not hat. She got various colour of shoes n hat cos my mum loves handcraft.

Weikuan, I know, my fren used to work for childcare, so I know there's good ones around, but hard to convince them lor...I want Char to learn to be indept n social skills in childcare...if cant convince them, i hv to watch my mum closely to make sure she don spoil Char.

Delphine, if Desiree is healthy, weight not impt.
 
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