(2006/06) June 2006 MTB

Hi hidora,
Try to one ear in, one ear out
happy.gif
. Not easy though... I think during pregnancy, it's not easy to get along with some menopausal woman... They always complain this and that...
 


Lyn, how come you not sure if you will need c-section? bb too big?

MOAP, sometimes when i work from home, i don't even tell my ILs. else my MIL will wanna buy me lunch, or buy me stuff from the market to cook... it's really a good intention on her part, but i prefer not to 'entertain' anyone. just cook instant noodles or walk across the street to eat lunch outside.

if i do go back to my ILs place for dinner, it's only when my dh is free. maybe once or twice a week? we used to have complusory Sat dinners with them as well, but nowadays, trying to cut down, as i do not have the appetite, and sometimes feel v tired. actually, sometimes, i do feel guilty for not spending enough time with them....
 
Tinklebell,

No lah, not shutting her from my life lah. I dun want people to say I got no respect for elders. But well, I feel that by moving back will be good for me and bb, as I think with my constant crying, I'm gonna suffer from pre natal blues..

I guess the main reason is that I'm not working. I will be finding a job after confinement. The reason why I stopped working was becos my contract ended. And also I wanted to concentrate on my last few modules. I will by hook or by crook find a job.

JoJo,

Thanks, I'm feeling better now. Gotta cheer up for bb. Else I'll hv contraction again.

Josephine,

No show down lah. I'm not those who will go into a fight and fight.. Somemore cannot fight win her one. Lol. Anyway, I was in my room, but she scolded so loudly that I can hear. Then she said should get us to move out. So I moved out lor.. Nothing wrong rite? Hehe.
 
hidora, parents can be very sensitive abt allowance thingy..in front of u they wont say but i heard a lot of complaints fr my aunties behind their children's back. Maybe u all give her a bit yishi yishi lor. Last time when my hub was in NS for 2 yrs after our wedding (v broke after that), took home only 1k plus but he gave his mum $500 cos dont want to spoil the relationship bec of $. We just live within our means with whatever we have lor.
 
MOAP,

Wa.. your FIL also one kind.. lol

That's what I'm scared of.. Been hving contraction for whole night.. So scare my bb will come out pre-term! Dun wanna risk it.

kk,

Ya lor, she always said when she's young, very cham.. hmm.. maybe she see me staying at home not working, so she's very pek chek. :p

lyn,

My frens ask me the same thing! Is my mil gng thru menopause.. But but I think her menopause was a few yrs back leh..
 
Hidora, think it might be too rash for u today to decide whether to move out or not or what to do in future cos u r in the heat of the moments. Juz move out till ur confinement n enjoy your stay with your mom.. when u have cooled down, u will be able to think of a better solution..

Ha ha Serene, u r quite smart to plan your rooms so well.. Hmm I might also face the same prob.. I oso worry whether can mix with MIL, esp during confinement. My MIL will stay at my place during the whole confinement and my mom will help out part-time.. Now our r/sp ok, but familiarity breeds contempt. Afraid see too much will have quarrels

Now having cold feet, thinking whether I shd stay at my moms place during confinement but abit cramped leh., plus already booked Mil, dun noe how she feels if I tell her no need liao.. my hb oso scared that I cant mix with MIL and keep asking whether I sure want to be taken care by MIL..

Even if I pass the confinement period, its likely that she will take care of my bb when I go back to wk.. I scare that I dun like her teaching method.. plus she wants us to employ a maid to help out.. her request is reasonable lah, but I dun want to spend extra $ on a maid cos I dun need a maid.. I have my moms maid if I want to help out for my own place.. I rather save the $ for my childs education or other purposes..

I dun think my IL will move out n stay with us one day, but my hb n I plan to move near to them in 2-3 yrs time for convenience sake.. but these days when we are wking out the sum.. we realize that if we dun stay in the city, we may get a bigger apt or hse.. plus it may be a good idea not to stay too close.. see how it goes lah..
 
tinklebell,

I think so too. Maybe she's thinking spend so long to raise her son up, and before she can get any allowances from him, he's spending it on the kid. Haiz. I need a job! Anyone needs part time maid? Hehe.
 
peng,

My mom is gonna do my confinement and babysitting. So we will be staying with her, and coming back here every wkend. Was planning to move back in May, just bringing it forward now.
 
MOAP, paid $16 for 80g, 10g for a week, minimum 2-3 cups recommended, 1 teaspoon per cup. The sales lady said must drink religiously to see the effect.
happy.gif
Hence, the bag I bought should be able to last me 2 months.

If you buy from MIM online, 50g only $4.50. But the diff is the one i got is Organic. Not sure whether MIM is organic. If so, cheaper to buy online, cos 100 g plus postage is $13.50.
 
hidora
My father is only child also! Try to look on brighter side, try to think about yrself and fight for the best situation if you can.

kk
Same here, my hubby has his mum heart too! told me that one day if his mum like to come over to stay with us, or if a need to stay together, he will welcome his mum! I'm very sianz...also tried hard to emphasize my worry, and tell him i dun like to stay with in law under one roof! I don't believe living one roof in harmony!

Amy
Actually i feel sorry for my own mum that she already look after my sister's son for 14 yrs, very tired over these yrs and abit weak now, so i take risk let my MIL look after lor. Actually i dun think my MIL likes it very much to look after my baby, i think more on she do it for the sake of her son (my hubby). she knows to buy her son's heart, same my hubby has his mum's heart also.
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Ya since already decided to let her look after, i have no choice liao, cross my fingers, hope for the best lor.
 
Hidora,
Dont worry too much now... take a good rest at your mum's place ...somehow hor "chuan dao qiao tou zi ran zi" ...things will sort out nicely by themselves.

The idea of staying in same block but different unit seems like a good idea also. At least u can do wat u want in the privacy of your own home. I cannot imagine staying with my mother in the same household, what more my MIL leh... cos i like to stock up sinful food in the fridge... everytime i hear my mother coming, i will hide those food lor :p 2 women in the household seems like quite challenging hor.
 
peng, i am in the same situation as you. even though i have CL, i am worried MIL will drop by everyday. after CL leaves, maybe she will also continue to drop by everyday... hmm... i have to take it positively... she is doing this cos she cares... so i should be happy rite? my own mum also not as helpful and caring. never made me any tonic soups... not even interested to help out... so i should be thankful there is someone who is willing to help me. i think when there is help offered, we should take it.
happy.gif
 
MOAP,

Gonna go home now, take a good rest before I rush my assignments. Hopefull no more scary contractions.


Serene,

Dun think too much yet since it has not happen. At least your MIL is willing to take care of your bb. My mil already said in the beginning that she doesnt know how to take care of bb and so not doing it.


tinklebell,

Haha, I also like sinful food. And my mil is those super healthy one. Everytime say I should not eat this, should not eat that. Even my cooking style, she also find it too oily, too salty, too sweet. Haiz..
 
Serene, ya... my dh also mentioned will need to take in one of his parents if the other pass away. i am ok with this, as long as we have ample space. dh said if we do this, will definitely move to a bigger house, so we can still keep our privacy.

actually, my dh quite filial, cos he is also willing to take in my parents one day... even though i know my parents won't come and stay with us. but it's the nice tot that counts...
happy.gif
 
on a lighter note, do watch Chicago on channel 5 @10pm tonight! my fav show! watched it twice on cinema! it's a musical, lotsa of dancing and intriguing plot.

bought ice cream to keep myself happy tonight! yeah!
 
tinklebell,
Ya....older folks are like tat. Even though they say dont want allowance they will be very happy even if u juz give them a token amount....my parents and pils also like tat...*lol*

hidora,
Take a gd rest at ur parents place...and dont go and think bout other stuffs
happy.gif
 
hidora
ya in life, there's already so much to worry and think about, sometimes, i try not think about it too much esp on things that has not happen but i believe is preparation......always try to do the best out of it! Hmm, i dunno what will happen next time, but i will try my best to fight for best situation possible...hope so! Actually im worried of my own character lah, im very soft hearted at most times! So i need to protect myself leh......my hubby never stand by me sometimes, he thinks i over reacted, think too much!
 
Amy, same here, my dh will also volunteer to take in one of his parents if the other passes away. I have no objections with that. I'm sure the same will hold for my parents.

peng, at least both ur mum and mil volunteer to do confinement for u... mine didnt leh and i dont think i want to ask lor cos if they want, they would have said earlier. if i ask, they will feel "pai seh" to say no. anyway, am happy to have a CL... at least for sure i know i wont be so "sim-tia" to see mum or mil "or-bak-kak" with all the night wakes.
 
amy
my hubby sure expect me to understand and compromise when come to the time that his mum wanna moved in with us! Sianz, we quarrelled over such matters before! He always think his mum is very nice and kind, just that i dun understand her and i'm too sensitive! I dun wish to be too close n understand my MIL so much like him, becos no matter what, i believe there is always a diff n gap between MIL and DIL, she will never treat me the same as if like her own child...... i believe in keeping a respectful gap apart so that everyone 'hao lai hao qu'.....each won't step into the other party's border...
 
Hidora,
Cool down.. guess temporary u should move back to your mum's place till ur confinement. Hopefully, during this period ur hubby can hv a good talk with ur MIL. Dont worry too much...

My DH is also the only son with a younger sister. I suppose they will move it with us once her sister got married. Anyway, am also having thots that MIL willing to look after my ger is it becos of my DH. Thru'out my pregnancy, MIL never even bother to cook any tonic stuffs for me nor contribute anythings. Is only recently she volunteered to make a beansprout pillow for my ger. Well, I wont hv high expectation from them juz hope that they dun step onto my "tail" can liao.

Personally, I think own mother is still the best.. like cook birdnest, black chicken soup and even buy confinement stuffs.. really nothing can describe the love they shower to us !!
 
Ladies, oh yes... just realised last nite that 15 Apr (Sat) is the deadline to submit income tax. U all submit already? I rushed to do mine last nite ... gotta help my hub and dad do theirs soon.
 
Hi amy,
I had two surgeries before and got two scars. If the wound become too thin, will need C-section already. Now telling baby not to grow too big.. lol... I tell baby to come out between 3 - 3.2kg... lol...

Hi hidora,
Maybe still got some after effects of menopause lingering... lol..
What type of job will you be looking for? I might also want to get a job... I am thinking of getting a half-day job. Dunno got such thing in Singapore or not hor?


hmm... I think you gals quite lucky to have help during your confinement.. There are people whose mum or MIL both not willing to help...
 
Hidora: sorry to hear abt your MIL problems. i think we are more sensitive while pregnant, so learn to "one ear in one ear out". I know it's hard, but it's better to just ignore what she said for your sake and bb's sake.
can't change the person she is, but u can change your reaction to her.
happy.gif


i find myself very very sensitve to what ppl says these days too.
LIke yesterday, my coll asked if my baby confirm girl. I said yes, then her face changed and she said, oh well, can try again next time. I was like, huh ? what do u mean? She said, oh, i tot you wanted a boy. So i said, boy or girl, both fine. i mean, that was so bloody insensitive !
who are you to comment wte I wish to have a boy or girl ?!

Also, same coll used to comment that i sld wear baggier clothes.
and that she noticed that my breasts shrunk after first tri ???

so strange right, some people ???
so, i try to practice the "one ear in, one ear out" and not let it affect me ...
 
Hi K Ong,

So ur colleague had a boy??

What's wrong with having a girl?? Haha.. i told my hubby how i wish my next one will be a girl too. Then i no need waste money buy new sets of clothes for the second child :p
 
k ong,
your colleague so funny...even pay so much attention to your figure....can even comment abt your breats....u should suan back and ask why she so interested in your breast mah..*LOL*
 
Lyn, got surgery cannot go for natural birth? I mentioned to gynae before that i had surgery but he didnt say i couldn't go for natural birth... opps... i think i better ask him to reconfirm again. But i do notice that the wound hurts occassionally esp in 3rd tri. Aiyo...I really dont wish to go for c-section.
 
well, people always so weird..when they ask u girl or boy...if u say boy, they congrats u happily...if u say girl, they will just say "oh..I see" then keep quiet...
 
Okasan,

Ok lah, i think younger generation like us prefer girls to boys. Whenever i tell my younger colleagues i am having a girl, they say "so sweet!".. well, either they really mean it, or they bluff wan lor hahahaa...
 
i also prefer a girl, but expecting a boy. initially i quite upset, but now rationalise can try again next time. Boys can be fun too i tell myself, and low maintenance haha
 
jo, boys will know how to find their fun. frankly speaking i dont mind having another boy also lah. yes, low maintenance cos nothing nice to buy for them to wear... always the same boring colors and designs.
 
kk: she has 2 boys !!
okasan: i know ! it's like she keeps watch on my pregnancy like that ... she's a few yrs older than me ... so maybe trying to see what i'm doing, and comparing herself to me ?
cuz sometimes when i wear strapless and backless tops, she will say, wah, so sexy ah ?
i also dunno how to respond to these statements !
i think some ppl still think boys are better than girls, but i dont think so, i mean, I AM A GIRL ! ahahaaa, and i think it's cool to be a girl !


BTW, does anyone know how to boil the soup wif gingo nuts and "tau kee" ? i dunno what it is called but supposed to be good for baby complexion.
 
Jo/Tinklebell: whatever gender, the baby will still be our own flesh and blood, so there is really no distinction ! haahaa, it's God's gift !

I mean, i wld prefer one boy one girl, just so i know what their characteristics are like ... and experience of having a kid of each gender. but if not ... then it is ok la ...
 
kk,
I prefer to have a girl too although mine is a boy....but, u will be surprised, there are young people who prefer boys coz they wanna chuan zhong jie dai....
 
Hi Ladies,

Ya rite.. even before my bb is borned, i have spent a bomb on girl's clothes liao.. from newborn to 18 mths HAHA! And whenever i go seiyu at bugis junction, the clothes are so tempting u know! And when the clothes are on offer, will be so much cheaper than those sold at kiddy palace. Kiddy palace kids' clothes are real expensive i realise. And there is only one brand there which is "max cool baby".

Hi K Ong,

Yooo, some pple thought they are sooo experienced, so they monitor what pple do. I can't stand such pple. How come ur colleague act like auntie ah? Make comment at everything u do.

Oh, not tau kee lah.. do u mean "fu zhu"? Can eat meh?/ Not cooling ah?? It is my favourite but i am voiding it since pregnant
sad.gif
 
anyhows, i think i have been eating too much lately, must cut down ... just finished $6 worth of duck rice from circular st !!!
better go take a walk now ! haahaa
 
I would want my next one to be the same gender, so that they can be playmates
happy.gif
I always think one boy one girl pretty bored, because they have nothing in common as they grow up.
 
K Ong,

Last nite dinner we ate out.. and my hubby wanted noodles and i wanted rice. So there was this nice stall at the food court that sells roast meat. So in the end, i bought one plate of rice for myself. Not only that, i dun just buy meat for my own dinner.. i bought meat for 2 pax! Hahaha.. end up spend $10.50 on one big plate of soy sauce chicken and roast duck.
 
k ong,
for the ginko and tau kee soup, I know how to cook but dun have the recipe coz I just add the ingredient as I like...only thing to note is u add the tau kee only after the water is boiling and cannot cook too long coz the tau kee will melt
happy.gif


think it's prefect to have 1 girl and 1 boy...but my friend has another way of thinking...she says it's cruel to have 1 girl and 1 boy coz they dun have playmate....so she wanna 2 girl and 2 boys...hehe....
 
okasan, ya boy, talking abt preferring boyz, my hub is one classic eg lor.... he really hoped our no1 was a boy bec i think he still has the "lau ah pek" kind of mentality abt boyz being able to "chuan zhong jie dia". haha!
 
Okasan,

2 boys 2 girls??!! Now i see families with 4 kids i have phobia haha.. i ask my hubby how the couple going to cope!

I prefer all girls.. if i am going to have three, all three gotta be girls heee... i dun mind not having boy :p
 
kk,
u have the same thinking as my friend...she also think 1 girl 1 boy quite boring...better to have 2 of the same gender so they have playmates...
 
tinklebell,
My gynae did not say no to natural birth for me. He told me gotta depend on circumstances and the risk a bit high cos I also had a big cut on my uterus. So now I dunno whether I need C-section... Or I can go ahead get myself mentally prepared for drug free natural birth.
The ends of my wound also hurt sometimes... It's those needle pricking type of pain... Is yours also this type of pain?

KOng,
Just do what you like and let that colleague comment lor... one ear in, one ear out. Maybe she envy you can wear sexy clothes and she did not have the chance already... hahaha...
Gal or boy also good la... Maybe she also wanted gal, but too bad God did not grant her so she jealous lor...

You are refering to "fu zhu yi mi". I boil and drink quite often. My mum said last time she took it daily.
Boil barley in water, add gingko nuts and rock sugar. Then add "fu zhu". Can use double boil also... sonetimes I also add "lian zi".
 
tinklebell,
ya, some people still have such thinking...but it's very funny to have such thinking esp when u are educated loh.....my brother once told me this which I think is very true loh....

he said from the science point of view, a girl or a boy will each carry part of the father's blood...so regardless boy or girl, both also can chuan zhong jie dai loh...

the only difference is for chinese, female don't carry on the surname...
 
lyn
Both my MIL and mum not helping me with confinement, i paid to engage a confinement lady to help.

K Ong
Im a sensitive person, I also hear alot of nonsense these days. So sianz and fed up! Im always careful and kind with my words to others, but always there're ppl out there who are very insensitive with their words n hurt ppl! No choice, we living in a community, can't stop everyone's mouth!
 
tinklebell,
My hubby very funny one... He wants a boy cos his colleagues and friends, all have gals... He said later society imbalance and his boy can inherit his boxes and boxes of star wars toys... But then hor, I showed him my friends, all got boys... hahaha... Then he dun mind having gal gal... And my MIL prefers gal...
 
gals,
just curious, how many of us here expecting boys, how many expecting girls? In my cicle, already 4 of us having boys, my neighbour having girl. Looks like this dog year, more boys than girls.
 


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