(2006/01) Jan 2006 MTBs

durianlover

do you think that janelle might suddenly develop a fear of the darkness or being alone? You know like some children are afraid that there's monsters in the room that sort of thing?
 


Sandra

It will not be easy to tear yourself away from your girl but on the otherhand, sooner or later she will have to go to school and the job opportunities may not be the same then... i think you should really discuss it with your husband so that he knows what to expect and so that he can support you.. Last thing you want is if you go for your job and your hb decides he can't take it. Sometimes you'll be surprised at how fast children can adapt to change...

Durian lover..
I have the same problem as you!!!
Tabby can roll herself to sleep at night but only on my bed.. then i will transfer her to her cot.. if she sleeps through abt 2 nites a week.. then good.. otherwise if she wakes up and cries then got to transfer her to our bed...

She has been really sticky to me.. she just needs to feel me next to her or climb on top of me to sleep.

Let me know how you solve this problem....

Celine
I don't mind my girl going to childcare but i'm terrified of her getting sick!!

i'm considering putting her in childcare when she's 2years cos then my second one will be about 5-6months hopefully have some immunity in case she brings home any illness...

Does anyone have any opinions about Pat's schoolhouse/ little skool house/ eton playschool.. i'm thinking of sending my girl to these playschools?
 
mashy,
haha, i knew it! Wolfberries is heaty! I win!!!

ya lah, last month when Meg had the high fever, it was also after taking wolfberries porridge. Hb jus dun believe me...
 
Durianlover, I think you should just hang in there for the time being. Sarah also goes thru phases when she becomes extra clingy and whiney at night. Very tough for me too since Im also a light sleeper. But usually those times will pass, sometimes within 3 days, sometimes a week. But it will pass. I guess they just are feeling insecure then. Maybe their day time schedule had been too exciting or they saw something new that shocked them. So it kinda reflects in their bedtime. It's hard but I think you have already been doing a good job so far. Just hang in there for a while longer.

Celine, I have thought about putting sarah in a childcare centre. But was just worried that she might fall sick frequently thereafter. Ive taught in kindergartens/childcare centres before, and I really feel sorry for the kids there sometimes. They'ld really miss their parents and caregivers at that age. Some might seem to adapt well at first. But throughout the day, they will start asking about their parents. Ive seen teachers who are impatient threatening the kids that their parents will not come for them at the end of the day since they misbehaved. You should see their scared faces. Very poor thing...You can see that many of them just struggle to be brave when their parents drop them off. That's the problem with me. I told myself before that I won't subject my kids to that at too young an age but I'm actually considering that now. Hence the guilt... *sigh*
 
Durianlover,
I believe your girl is a high need baby, same as mine. she needs to suckle to sleep. I tried the cry-it-out method once but she took 1hr 45mins to stop and fell sick the next day. we didn't cont after that. Perhaps you can try for one or 2 more nights since it seems to be working since she sleeps after 1 hr. I believe eventually kids will go to sleep on their own and although this is a trying period for parents, it will no matter what be a short period in life. have you try to find out why is there a sudden change in sleep behaviour? is she being treated well in the daytime? some babies react in a certain way because of what they see in the daytime. my colleague's 20 mths daughter wake up to cry at night when her parents quarrel in front of her.

Clariss was sleeping with us on our queen size bed from 3 months onwards, she can't sleep for long in her cot. I decided to put her on a mattress next to our bed 2 weeks ago so now I sleep next to her until she is asleep and I will climb back to my bed. I find that she sleeps better because she has more space to roll around and it's safer because she won't have the danger of falling off our queen size bed in the morning when I go to wash up.
 
Yeah tabby. I know that. My husband had actually told me that just go and work but if the job takes up too much time, he wants me to quit immediately. I was upset with him when he said that but he doesnt see the point. My credibility will be affected if I just leave like that no? And being mothers, it's always hard when THEY play the 'for the baby's good' card. I know that kids will adapt pretty fast to changes. I'm just not certain whether it is better for their overall wellbeing to start 'schooling' at this age. It is afterall their formative years and I'm wondering if it is better if we have already instilled the right discipline and values in them before putting them outside where they can get influence by the behaviors of other kids. They pick up bad habits very fast and I'm worried that sarah might just pick up more bad habits than good ones without guidance from at least one parent (since we have no one else to look after her). My hubby is mostly doing his own stuff and does not really play with sarah. He does bathe her sometimes and change her diapers but mostly he leave her to me. So,I have really lots to consider...
 
sandra,
Thanks for the quote from the book! It kind of makes me all the more want to give up the cry-it-out method!
As for your job, i'd choose to be SAHM if i were you. Hee i'm gonna quit my job by end May so of course i'd advocate being SAHM lah!
happy.gif


mashy,
THanks for the links! Don't think it's coz she's afraid of the dark coz even for morning and afternoon naps (when it's bright), she also wants to be carried n hugged.

Tabbiesus,
Haha u're so funny! Looks like we're in the same boat! Ya my girl is also very sticky to me. It's actually quite funny when she tries to lie on my head or body to get to sleep...affectionate yet 'suffocating' for me! Most of the time she actually falls asleep hugging me to sleep on my bed...Sometimes i think i shd just appreciate this phase when she's sticky to me because who knows how long it'll last!

But i think there's a 70% chance i'm gonna give up the cry-it-out method already....am really torn coz i've only tried it out for 1 night. The question is, shd i give it another day (ie. today) to try it out or give it up totally?

Thanks for all ur advice!
happy.gif
 
Sandra,
Are you intending to have a 2nd kid soon? If so, may i suggest that you don't work. Coz it'll be tough to cope with pregnancy and a toddler! I also fully agree with you that the first few years (first 6 years to be specific) are the child's formative years. Once you instill the right values during this time, you get them for life! So I feel it is a good sacrifice to make for the well-being of the child.

On the flipside, I do have friends who try to enter the workforce after being SAHM for 6 years or more, and they find it extremely difficult. Not only is it difficult to find a good job, it is also difficult to cope having been "out of touch" for so long.
 
durianlover

in the 2nd link i sent, it said something about fear of separation which is carried over to bedtime.

Fear of separation can also turn bedtime into a struggle. "Nighttime is scary for most children," Dr. Brody says. "Your toddler may resist going to sleep because she doesn't want to give up her wakefulness-and all the things that provide her a sense of security, like her toys, pets, or Mom and Dad." Certain comforting routines, such as giving her a warm bath or having her snuggle up on your lap for a story, can provide the extra reassurance she needs before bed. "It's soothing to know what comes next," Dr. Brody says.
 
RE : Huggy Bears
Haiz...my boy also suddenly like that now. In the middle of the night, wld wake and cry climbing to sleep on top of me or needs to be hugged. Sometimes it takes juz a while for him to feel "shiok" before returning to slumber. But sm nights, he takes an hr or so. I will hv to scratch his back, scratch his head, sayang his face, smell his face....

Same as durainlover's my boy doesnt want daddy. He wld wail reaching for me. Once the lights is out, he'll start looking for me liao.

Yesterday night, decided to play after that. Woke from 1+ to 3+.

I guess cos we co sleep so its easy for him to "access" me. I cant leave him alone to cry it out as he wld too dangerous as he's not in cot. Tried the cot but din work. He's also a messy sleeper and cot simply has not enough space for him.

Hopefully its juz a passing phase.
 
durianlover,
for me, i sit beside caleb during his bedtime. When he crawled to me to carry him, i will 'push' him back on his mattress. I duno.. at least it worked for us.
Then i also told him that dark dark means must sleep already, cos it means late already. So now when i switched off the lights, he kinda know that its sleeping time.

initially i tried the crying out method. Caleb cannot take it leh.. in the end, throughout the whole nite, he keep waking up crying leh. So i tink try till u get the best method.
 
Tracy,
Eh...i hv one thermometer that can be used on the forehead as well as ears. Not too sure if can be used behind ears like your friend's. It din work very well for me. When I took my boy's temp when he was hot, it showed no fever constantly. BUt when i went PD, he was hving high fever. Got a real shock!
 
Re: SAHM 1st 6 yrs or more

haha, seems like SAHM has no end leh. While the first 6 years are the formative years, when they get to pri and sec sch, they needed to be watched over too, esp when friends become more important to them. My colleague had to change to part time to watch over her kid who's in Sec 1. Seems that children nowadays mature earlier. They are already talking about going steady and knows about sex from their friends (mostly warped views). Some are even sending porno photos to each other!
 
Durianlover,
I used to have similar problems with Charmaine - she wants to be nursed to sleep. I have also tried the cry-it-out method before but it's really too traumatising for su. charmaine will cry till she vomit out her milk and it's really terirble. So I gave up. I got this book from the library and am still going through it - it's the no-cry sleep solution by Elizabeth Pantley. Am at chapter 2 now and basically she advocates sth between cry-it-out and bear-with-it. I think Dr William Sears recommends this book as well? Let me finish and I will share the principles in the book with you...

SY, Sandra
I have considered not working as well but when I tried that out for 1 week. I don't think SAHM suits me. I would like to do part-time work - I think it's really the best for me. I can put Charmaine with my mum or mil or childcare for half the time then spend the other half with her. However when i bring that up to my boss. He's not really supportive. Sigh.

Re: sick babies
It seems that there are a lot of sick babies now. My Charmaine fell sick too. : ( Very bad coughing - she actually threw out thrice last night. Just came back from the PD. PD gave her nebuliser as well. She really didn't like it - was screaming the whole clinic down... Gosh!
Mamachan, did you go back to teh PD again for nebulisier? The PD only told us to go back in 1 week's time.
 
Esther;
YEs! I'm enjoying my time here so much i really dont feel like flying back =(


Sandra;
I'm a SAHM. Financially we're ok if i don't work. I guess whatever decision you make, you have to be able to come to terms with it.

There are times when i really miss dressing up and going to work...socialising with colleagues, and generally the feeling of purpose you get when you're doing a job. But i tell myself work opportunities will be there even say 5 years later. but Rory will only be 1 y/o, 2 y/o etc etc once. Do i really want to miss all his 'firsts'? It helps that my hubby is very supportive. Maybe have a more heart-to-heart chat with your hubby to sort out the mixed signals he had given u.

I read blogs of SAHMs to inspire myself. An especially good one is Karen Cheng's (www.karencheng.com.au), she's a full time homemaker with 2 little boys and loving every minute of it.
 
CL,

Thanks for checking out on the school info.

SY,
I think 2A1 is earlier than 2A2? I didn't realise that it cost so much to join the alumn. : (
 
chillies

i've that too. and it's not accurate to use on the forehead. should use it on the ears more accurate. Mine is CADI and must say that it's a lousy thermometer.
 
durianlover
Well, at the end of the day, it really is up to you. Seems like the cry-it-out method is working for your gal coz she did managed to fall asleep after one hour. You can try for one or 2 more nights and see how it goes from there. There's always 2 sides of a coin when it comes to parenting, end of the day, do what is best for both mummy, daddy and baby. A happy, well-rested family is most impt.

There will be the few occasions where I would just want to cuddle Daren to sleep, both of us enjoy that. But I can't do it most nights as he's heavy and straining my back big time that I couldn't engage in proper play with him. I just know that he's still pretty much a happy baby and greets me with a smile almost every morning. Can even hear him talking to his bed friends in the morning.
 
Sandra

we can hi 5 on our hubby's responses.. my hb will come home and see me taking care of baby and just say hi then sit down and play star wars on his lap top... Ask him to watch my kid.. he uses eye power only and when she falls, he says but he was watching..

I agree with you... it will be a tough choice... to be honest with you.. i'd find it very hard to go back to work again... cos personally feel your bond is very strong with Sarah and also if you have no back up caregiver plan.. very hard for you to not worry about her. For me, my mom has been helping out so i used to feel secure going to work thinking she's in good hands.. but these few days.. with my dad and my hb taking care of my girl.. i get so worried... i can't really concentrate.. i worry that her timetable will be messed up and all sorts of stuff.. but each day i come back and see my girl "survive' so i dunno if i'm over reacting..

Pray about it.. God may have put the job opportunity to you for a purpose.. it may not be for you to accept it but for you to realise what your goals are for you and sarah mae for the next few years...
 
Sandra

As a mommy who joined the workforce after being SAHM for 7 months and now quitting to be SAHM again after 7mths, I think you gotta think whether you can stand not being with your gal, letting your gal be closer to others, missing out her milestones etc.

And after joining back the force, I realised that my priorities have changed. Previously i will work like siao, but now I just make sure the min is done so that I can be home with my ds. I cannot pour my heart and soul into my work coz I have to constantly worry about my boy getting sick at the childcare.

But I must say that the 7 mths when I'm working gave me a breather coz I was kind of burnt out from looking after my boy the first 7mths. How about doing part time work instead?
 
choice of school
I guess for me, most likely send Daren to Fairfield Primary. Since I'm an old girl, but yet to join the alumni. Better do it soon. If all else fails, still have my mum whose an old girl too. Talk about heritage. But my mum pushing me to enrol Daren in ACPS via the methodist church that she's attending. That means I'll have to go back to my previous church.

SY/sl
In NUS, it's relatively ok to convert to work part-time. So long have the director of your department or boss' approval, just need to write in the the HR dept citing the reasons as well as the hours per week you opt for (either 21 hours or 28 hours). Benefits will be reduced accordingly. And when I feel ready to convert back to full-time, also no problem, but dependent if the grant still running. Coz we're considered under grant so will have to renew contract yearly. I'm considering working 28 hours/week which will work out to 2 full days and 3 x 1/2 days a week.
 
Mashy,
I used both the forehead and ear. He felt hot and strangely either way, the temp was fine. I was damn shock to see the temp on the GP's thermometer.

Tab, SL, Sandra,
My hub can also join the gang, Ask him to look after, he wld nod and continue to watch TV or surf net. Sometimes I go shower n he looks after, I come out n see my boy playing by himself in the room and hub out of sight. Or he will switch on TV and ask my bot to watch. Haiz...told him to use TV "sparingly" but he nv understand.

He told me last night he's tired (meaning, I hv to look after myself) as he slept only 4 hrs as he worked early. I looked at him and told him flatly, I've not slept well for a year!!! The first few months, a 4 hrs sleep to me was already a luxury. Stop complaining!
 
Tabbie

PV = Parent Volunteer

Sandra, what you have quoted is attachment parenting. There is babywise vs babylove. It's extreme ends of parenting style and most of us adopt part of each. Some parents feel that with Attachment parenting, it builds up the child's confidence when he's older.

As to your question, I'll choose to be a SAHM. Like u, I can't outsource my kids completely. In fact, my hubby's is on a no-travelling job and part of his consideration on jobs is if there's travelling. He wants to see his family every day and I think no amt of money nor job satisfaction replaces that. However, some parents I know need personal space and travelling suits them (esp if they have a good care-giving arrangement)

Durianlover, give the crying out method another night or 2. A fren told me it takes 7 days... first day is the worst.

.ky.
 
Hey Mashy, I actually think that maybe part time work will work out better but it's not everyday that something Im interested in has an opening. Hence the dilemma. Mayhaps, I'll feel alot better if there was some sort of regular meetups with fellow SAHMs. Then our lives would feel a little more whole- not just baby, baby and more baby. Frankly, I love to look after sarah. But I also get days where I miss the thrill of recognition in a workplace. I always tell myself that being SAHM is also like working. In fact even more challenging- but I guess, when we're by ourselves most of the time, plus when our hubbies are very self-absorbed, we don't really get the recognition that we deserve. That kinda make us dissatisfied, I suppose.

Tabby, I laughed out loud when you said your hubby use eye power only. My hubby too. Sarah can fall flat on her face and he can just stare at her. When I yell at him, hell always say-"But I'm watching her what..." *sigh* Men! Thanks so much for your insight. I'm still trying to figure out. Hard to listen to the inner voice when I have so many thoughts shooting thru my mind right now. Especially when we're going to move in April and my ILs are going to London next week for 2 whole months. If I decide to work, it will really take a lot of adjustments and planning to make sure all goes smoothly. That's why Im extremely antsy and worried. =\

CassCL, you're spot-on. I also miss all the things you wrote about missing. I guess it does sound kinda superficial when you put it that way. =) You're really lucky to have a supportive husband. My hb is supportive BUT he tends to be more insensitive than not. Typical china man. I have to put things in HIS perspective and explain till the cows come home before he gets the message.

Durian Lover, I'm actually not certain when I'll have my next kid. After my ectopic pregnancy in Oct, my menstrual cycle is completely messed up. I've checked with my gynae and he said that my fertility should not be compromised and that I should give myself some time before menstrual cycle go back to normal. I've been waiting for it to do so, but it's still thirty over days leh. Whenever my hb and I BD, also never hit jackpot. Can't help but wonder if the gynae is wrong about my fertility. So I'ld leave it in the hands of God when it comes to babymaking.

Agreed that it'll be harder to start working again after stopping work for too long. Maybe by then we can start our very own Joyluck Club. =)
 
KY, my hubby travels every month for a week. I'll prob have to travel too if I take up this job. In a way, things r getting clearer. I'll try to negotiate for a mostly 9 to 5 job- give and take some days where I have to work late. I'll let my exboss know that I have to put my family first. And if he doesn't agree, than I won't take it up. I guess, that'll be better.
 
durianlover
If you're determined to use the cry it out method, you should not go into the room every 5-10 min. In fact, you should not even go into the room. If you find that difficult and you're worried, think abt installing cameras in the room instead so you can monitor her from outside. Every time you walk into the room, the clock resets. Therefore, you're delaying her crying time and not helping by walking into the room. The correct way of doing it should be exponential amount of time before you walk in, eg, 20min, 30min, 45min, 1hr, ie, first time, 20min of crying. After that, wait for her to cry another 30min before going in, etc. By this way, she would have cried for 50min when u see her a 2nd time.
 
tabby, sandra, SL, chilles
My hb also the same. SOmetimes, I need to go to the loo or walk away for a short while and ask my hb to watch over Ariene. When I come back, Ariene will be doing something dangerous or chewing something forbidden, tearing and eating tissues or climbing chairs while hb is still looking at his stupid notebook. Sigh.. So nowadays, when I ask him to watch Ariene, I'll make sure he tears his eyes away from the notebook and goto Ariene first before I walk away.
 
Heehee,
my hubby is the opps of most hubbies here. I am the one using eye power sometimes. haha! my hubby plays silly games and entertain my gal everynight. he is her playmate and I am her food source and comfort source.

sarah,
when I was pregnant,I thought I would enjoy being a SAHM. I knew I don't want to be a SAHM after my 12 weeks maternity leave. I tried again after 10mths when my MIL went overseas for 1 week. again I feel that I don't enjoy it and it will be better for both me and clariss when I work. my colleague's mother was a SAHM but she didn't enjoy it and it turned out that both her sister, hers and their mother life are miserable.
now that clariss is 13 mths, I think I may want to give it a try again. I feel that it really depends on individual and if you really want this job, u should try your best to make a good arrangement so that you can focus on your work and sarah will enjoy her days. clariss misses me a lot when I am not around and I miss her too and because of this we tried to make the best use of the available time and make everything as enjoyable for us (including my hubby) as possible.
 
Hi mummies
Did not read the postings since CNY and there are already 6 pages of archives :> Too much for me to catch up.

Mamachan,
Hope Darren recovers soon. Aidan had similar symptoms, cough, lots of phlegm, runny nose before CNY too. He still has some phlegm although he has stopped coughing.

Durianlover,
The last time, when I heard how successful Rachel and Mamachan etc were in putting their babies to sleep on their own, I was also very inspired to try. But I am a soft hearted mummy; somehow I dont think I can carry out the cry it out method effectively, so have not tried yet. One trick to share for active babies.. Aidan used to refuse to sleep at night; he will want to walk around even when we switched off all the lights. We decided to paste some glow in the night stars on our ceiling that motivated him initially to lie down quietly to look at the stars, so at least he will settle down for his sleep.

Gymboree trial
I am interested to go for a Gymboree trial at Serangoon Gardens during the weekends. They have 2 available slots during the weekends. The trial costs $34. Any mummy keen to join in? Lets try for March 10th, Sat?
Saturdays: 4:00pm-4:45pm
Sundays: 3:15pm - 4:00pm

Gymboree trial (Serangoon Gardens)
1. Cheng (Mar 10, ok)
 
Hi Sandra

Sometimes life is not perfect. It's good that you try to negotiate with your ex-boss... he's getting an experience staff rather than spending time and effort to get someone new. Try to impress upon him that quality of work is not dependent on the amt of time put in. I too had counter-propsed for 50% work when I first contemplated being a SAHM. That arrangement lasted for 7 months before I quit; it was not fair to my boss as I was the only one with the special treatment and that put him in a difficult position. But the entire arrangement got me mentally prepared for a different life.

In comparison, (I had work for more than 10 years before I left the work force), being a SAHM makes me a better person. I had learn to see things in a different perspective and in fact, I have a more fulfilling life now. Getting to meet other SAHMs of same or different mindsets open up my own viewpoint too. Even going downstairs to the playground brings opportunity to meet people, or just sitting at the bus stop gives simple pleasure in life which I realize I'll not be able to appreciate if I'm working. There are plenty of SAHMs who would love to meetup. There's the inertia that people are just waiting for someone to initiate. You get job satisfaction when you look at your products - your children. No one needs to give you that recognition. Even our dear government do not give SAHM recognition. As long as you are at peace with what you are contributing and don't ask for more, anything else came as an added bonus.

Re : cry-it-out method,
I did 5-10-15-20-25-30 min intervals. ie after the first 5 mins, I went in to see the baby. not carry but just to assure the child that mummy is here. When I did it, my son cried from 9pm to 11pm, and I realize that besides being alone, he's there alone in darkness. So, at 11pm, I went in, lie down on my bed with him in the cot beside my bed. He quietened down and played a bit before nodding off to sleep in the cot, within 20 mins. That was the first night. Before that, we co-sleep (ie he nurse thru' the night). Second night was hubby on duty and he had it easy, my son just lie down to sleep. After having overcame this obstacle, we actually develop a better bedtime routine that includes reading, doing a forward roll, singing even till today. Just to share ... u never know what to expect with each child. I thot my #1 was difficult to handle, now on hindthot, #2 is even more difficult and #1 is consider good.

Help need for Counselling for elderly
I'm facing difficulties with my mother. She's refuse to listen to us for a few years now and situation have not improved. Does anyone know who I can call to seek help on this? It's kinda difficult for me to share more on this here. thanks.

.ky.
 
HI mummies - There's a Babycare Festival at Suntec Hall 401 on 2-4 Mar (Fri-Sun). Admission is free. Fri-Sat 11am-8pm & Sun 11am-9pm.
 
I just visited my cousin in law who just became an unwed mother at a young age.

I was appalled at the state of living conditions they were in.

The flat was dirty, they've a pet dog and can smell the stench. Their 'sofa' is an old wooden frame (u know, those old type of sofa sets) without cushions but had cardboards on it. The doors looked like they're going to crumble. Gosh! Even when I was born more than 30yrs ago in an old 3-rm flat sharing with 8 other relatives, it wasn't as bad.

Looking at them, I feel so blessed but worried about how the boy will grow up.
 
Sandra,
Perhaps your cycle has switched to 30-plus days? Anyway, just let it regulate first and see how.
happy.gif


Mamapanda,
Think you mistook what i meant. I meant that no matter after how long an interval - if i were to go in to reassure Janelle - it wouldn't be much of a reassurance as it serves to only traumatise and frustrate her even more! Last night, i went in only once after 20 mins of screaming. It didn't help one bit. In fact, i think she was even more traumatised that i came in without picking her up and left the room again! Oh well.

Right now, Janelle is screaming beside me in her cot. Sigh. I've been carrying her for 30mins trying to get her to sleep but to no avail, so too tired put her down and she's screaming for me to pick her up. Wonder how and when will she learn to sleep on her own!

RE: cheese sauce
Mamapanda,
I tried out your recipe - wanna ask, does the cheese sauce turn out lumpy?? Mine was lumpy
sad.gif
 
Cheng

I am interested in the gymboree trial.

Gymboree trial (Serangoon Gardens)
1. Cheng (Mar 10, ok)
2. Zhimin (Mar 10, ok)

Durianlover

I tried out the cry-out method when Clarisse turns 8-month old. She was very dependent on us to rock her to sleep because my mil always rock her to sleep during day time.

But I was really very tired rocking her to sleep as she has grown heavier. The first time I tried I was alone at home and I gave up after she cried for 15 mins.

Second time hb was with me, Clarisse cried for a full 45 mins... At that moment we feel really painful too. And very unsure whether to pick her up... After 45 mins, she probably felt too exhausted and started sobbing softly... and finally she fell asleep. The moment she stopped crying we dashed in and checked on her...

We were very unsure whether to carry on... hb feels that she is very pitiful, and we decided to let her try one more night...

The next morning when she woke up I found that she is refresh and seems to forget we left her in her cot alone, so make me more determine to try out one more night. 2nd night her solid crying time reduce to 30 mins... and we started to feel encouraging... by the 4th day she only cries for 15 mins and she can fall asleep on her own...

Until now most of the nights she can sleep on her own after we leave the room. Although there are times which she will still fuss but we just leave her alone and peep from outside.

I feel that probably you may want to try out for another 2 nights. But I read from books before when baby turns older, they are smarter to make parents feel guilty for not picking them up at night, but just give the method a chance to work.

Or if you really can't bear to let her cry out, you may want to sit beside her cot and accompany her. But just don't pick her up. Talk to her if there is need. Every night move your position further away from the cot and till she is used to your way and fall asleep by herself. Similar to God's Child's method.

Another way is to leave her in her cot at night, when she cries, your hb can go in and comfort her but not pick her up... stretch the interval longer by each time. I guess this can't work on Clarisse because everytime she sees us she cries even louder.

But I guess babies are smart, they will very fast understand that you want her to sleep by her own... just that she needs time to adjust to this change.

Hope that helps.
 
mashy,
oh dear, sounds pretty bad. But I think such living conditions is still quite common in Singapore. I remember reading a special feature article done by a reporter in the ST and it shows that many families are still living in poverty in S'pore. It's just that we don't know. Very sad.. Yes, i hope your cousin-in-law's boy will grow up well.
 
Tracy

yah it's pretty bad. i've seen flats without furniture before, dirty flats too but usually there aren't any kids in there. i felt very sad and want to help them but dunno whether they would accept help. We didn't know about the baby until he was born. From what I know, all the rest of the relatives are doing rather well leh. I'm surprised that they didn't offer their help.

Anyone knows if the mother is an unwed mother, is she still eligible for childcare subsidy? Coz she's going to get a job, but need to look for someone to look after her boy.
 
thread is definitely moving at a bullet train speed...still trying to catch up...


CassCL - welcome to the preggy club. I think i am also ard your time for edd.

esther_lee - Leroy is very unique. actually i also started choosing names already...if it's a boy it be Caeden else it be Chloe. But then hb says both name is the same as his boss's kids! but i told him i dun care. haha...although i quite like the name Celeste but its already taken and i dun want to mix up with GOd's child one. hahaa..

sandra - maybe u can find a job that require less travelling? like wat ur hb says...8-5 that kind. it will help esp if you just switch mode from SAHM. i dun think u can tahan not seeing ur precious girl for so long. hee..

mamachan - good to hear that Daren is recovering so fast.

tracy - hope meg gets well soon. will keep her in my prayers.

rena - i am interested in the myanmmar maid. i am ok with Nov since i am due in mid aug and withg maternity leave and CL, it shld work out fine. please let me know the details and rates. .thanks!
happy.gif
 
SSF,
haha so cute! I should also start training Meg then I can get her to throw my stuff for me while I continue watching t.v. :p
 
SSF - so cute! Caleb so smart,knows how to throw own diapers... re names : Chloe is a nice name! actuali i feel your shld just choose the name you like... since u mentioned you liked the name celeste, i thot i share wf u the meaning of it in case u din know... heehee Celeste ( spanish word ) = From Heaven

Mashy - so sad to hear of that baby in such living conditions... never fails to remind us of how blessed we are! hope he can grow up well too...
 



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