(2006/01) Jan 2006 MTBs

Belinda
I push aden out of the house, he says bye bye and walk down to nanny place ha ha.

Yuki
good luck to your new job

Rachel
can email me the details for the bun making class and also your blog address ?

Ha ha i oso feel like starting up a blog ha ha but like i blur dunno how to
 


Whining/managing tantrums
If the crying is something I can ignore because I know it's just plain whining, I will ignore and just walk past my boy. He will then stop the nonsense and come up to me wanting a hug. I will then talk to him or pay attention when the whining stops. Sometimes if he cries for no reason and starts to throw tantrums and delibrately throw his toys and make a ruckus, I will ask him to stand one corner in the kitchen and I will walk away while he cries his heart out in the kitchen for a good 10 minutes. I will count in my mind to calm myself down and also, his cry will slowly die down. If the crying still persists, he stands isolated for 5 mins longer. Once he's more settled with his crying, I will call him out and will talk to him nicely and tell him that his crying is uncalled for.

Cane, now it's left only when he does things he's not supposed to or delibrately being very dangerously wilful. Thank goodness we hardly use the cane now... time out/ stand one corner is what my boy hates most and it's highly effective.

My boy knows he's in deep trouble when I fully raised my voice and call his name in full and his eyes will be all big and rounded up and if I scold him further, confirm break into a huge cry.
Then he'll while crying says ,"Daddy coming"...meaning Daddy come and help me. I told him,"you call for Daddy also no use, he will also scold and cane or make him stand one corner. No one can help you!!" I'm really harsh ...

Belinda
I think standing outside the house is a little too extreme... my cousin, well, at 16, my aunt did that to him (not the 1st time), he just walked away and didn't come home for 2 nights... very drama la, they called the police and all...only to see that he was loitering around the blocks and stayed at a neighbour's place...
 
CL,
Aden very funny.

Actually I tried giving stern warning of pushing J out of the house. I told her," Since u so naughty, I don't want u already. Ask Garung Guni come take you." Then she even replied back," You dun want me, I go Ah Ma (my mum) house. Dun want to come home."

From then, I stopped that. Cos I know she will run away from home if she mean biz when she grow up.
 
Hi Mamachan,

How do you get him to stay put? I put Megan at naughty corner, she still monkey around and try crawling out, or tip top to see if i am paying her attention.....

Now Megan favourite phase is "I don't be your friend!" if she don't get what she want or "I talk to you, you don't listen me! I don't want to talk to you!" if we ignore what she said the first time.....

The good thing about starting school is that she start to pronounce more clearly, all the Ts and Ss...
 
Belinda

I still think there should be other effective ways to 'tame' him. Perhaps you should try other stuff. I'm just afraid that this throwing out of the house will carry on till he's old enough to run away from home. No matter how noti, we must always let them know that we will still love them. At least then they'll know that there's still a way out.

I know there's kids who committed suicide becoz they thought they did a very noti thing and their parents don't want them anymore. Not to scare you, but such things do happen, esp in our current society. Later on, they may develop to such a stage that they won't dare tell you their mistakes/ noti things they did for fear of punishment and may even resort to extreme measures.
 
CL
I just emailed to your gmail acc on the baking class details. so far Sunny, Clare and i going. emailed you my blog site too. =)

yuki
Megan really loves to challeng you huh =p guess she pick up all these phrase from school. not a good thing, kind of rude but in a way cute.
 
CL
hee i sent to you in my 2nd email la. blur blur me forgot to attach the site address when i forward to you the baking class details. should reach you soon.
 
Hi Belinda and Mashy,

We also threaten to throw Megan out of the house a few times. Some nights where she refuse to sleep and kept disturbing the elder sister by sleeping on her, pull her hair etc, i brought the elder one and walk out of the room and ask her to sleep alone. Sometimes she still don't get it. Once she stay still in the room alone and keep shouting for Daddy.... Sometimes quite funny, the things she said "Daddy help me. Mummy don't want me, Daddy help me......"

Know it is not a good discipline method but sometimes she just drive us nuts.

Hi Rachel,

You are absolutely right. She is a challenge. I tried telling her it is not nice to say "Don't want to be your friend" but she just continue. SHe said that even to my parents and in laws and helpers......
 
Yuki - Yes $192 all in. Book on your own. Don't bother with the agencies cos they will earn booking fees. Go to the jetstar website to book. Just type all the info according to her passport can liao. Rem to cancel her work permit online. Once cancelled, they will issue a S pass. Print that & pass to her along with her work permit to hand over to immigration when she goes to the airport.
 
Hi Sysac,

Thanks for your info. Book her flight on 2 Nov. $122 only.
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I think it is the low peak period.

When must we cancel the work permit? One thing i hate is to go to the MOM website. Always so confusing. Haha.

So are you also maidless now like CL? CL is an amazing mum. Haha. Can clean house, bake, look after children.....

My helper going back probably to get married as she is 33 already. If she has a choice she rather mot married cos she don't feel secure as there's no job security for them, hard to provide for family. So she feel might as well don't get married but her mummy wants her to. She will call me if she wants to come back after her 1 month break. SHe has been with us for 4 years. I book on a sunday so we can send her off.
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Yuki / May,
Wow, I'm surprised at the things your girls say. I mean, they sound so mature, like they are in Primary school! I remember saying "I don't want to be your friend" or "don't friend you" only in Primary school! Isaac in contrast is stil llike baby. I mean, he can speak quite well now but will never say things like what Megan and Jamie say, at least not now.

Re. putting kids outside the house
I also don't feel right doing that. I don't even say "I don't want you" to Isaac. Though my ILs have threatened Isaac that way before. The worst that was done was when my HB got so mad at him and put him in the bathroom at night and close the door. It was complete darkness inside. Isaac was crying and banging on the bathroom door and I quickly pull him out. I got so angry with my HB for doing that cos I'm afraid Isaac will develop phobia.
 
Yuki - U can cancel one week before end of the work permit. Then, she'll be a S pass holder for that last week. Great to get it at $122...haha...

Yep, maidless since C is headed for school next yr. I am up at 5.30am to mop the house & make breakfast. I only cook on the weekends cos I still have my classes. Will have home cooked food for half the week cos my mum is with me.

Will have my PT maid back next week to do the ironing & cleaning though I do clean in the mornings too.
 
queen

my boy is also very babish now. Hahaha. Still can't do the 'i don't friend u' thing. He still behaves like a baby and I really hope he'll grow up sometimes. Hehehe.

CL
Finally baked my chocolate cupcakes last night for my boy to bring to school today for their party. Not very popular.
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Brought 10 there and 7 came back.
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But my boy loves it, so I'm happy.
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He kept going cake cake and ate up every bit of it. Last night, when my hb gave it to him for supper, and my hb 'stole' a bite from him, C was quite upset. He pointed to his own mouth and said 'here, here', as in not in your mouth, in my mouth.
 
Dear mummies,

Good day...
May i know if you've any good confinement lady to recommend to me?

My EDD is 7th April 09.

Many thanks.....
 
Esh Mummy,
Congrats! My EDD is 12 Apr 09 very near yours.

Queen,
Ya.. J is speaking like a primary school kid. But she converse mostly in mandarin. Really hope she can speak more english when she is in CC next yr. When are u going for NT scan?
 
Yuki
When I'm fierce, I'm really fierce...even if my mom or MIL happen to be around and my boy misbehaves thinking he can get away with his grandmas around, he gets scolding and time out...my mom or MIL will keep really quiet and won't even dare look at him or interfere. That's why my boy is quite scared of me and LOVESSSSS Daddy =P coz Daddy is his mountain and backing.

When I discipline him, I really mean biz, at 1st he walked away initially, I went to him and yelled "Who says you can walk away? You stand back there!" I don't smack him for walking away, just firmly bring him back to the same position, make him face the corner and hands on the wall and I walk away for about 5 min or so. I do sound scary but not screaming..... macham like giving marching commands in a big parade square.
 
mamachan
when you yell at your boy, did he cry? my gal ah... i raised my voice a bit higher or louder, she started crying. that annoyed me more...

eshmummy
congrats!
 
sunny
Of course he cried....until like so poor thing... but having said that, these moments doesn't happen all the time.

Esh Mummy
Congrats to you!
 
eh..hehe, i was thrown out of the house several times. once by my dad when i was in kindergarten cos i feign leg pain and refused to go school. Then my mum told me i was also thrown out when i was very young and i simply went crying to my nanny's house a few doors down.

I guess different kids will require different disciplinary actions bah. I didn't end up running away from home or feeling my parents deserted me. But i can't say the same for my sis hahaha, i'm sure she will leave home!

Wenyl,
Good to hear you enjoyed your trip! Are you still breastfeeding B while on this trip? Cos i'm going M'cca in end Oct and will still be bfing Duncan and wonder if it is convenient. I really dun wanna wean him off yet.

Esh_mummy,
Congratz! PM you my CL's contact. It's actually Krissie's contact.
 
tracie

that's prob coz you're very guai in the 1st place? hehehe. Coz i think this won't go down well with rebellious kids or those esp sensitive ones.
 
Tracie,
Last time kids and nowadays is very different. My mum told me she can just turn a chair up-side down and put me inside, I can sit still and finish a bowl of rice. She say for J, while she is turning the chair, she think J is already running away already.
 
Hi mummies,

Thks... :)
On May, Congrats to you too... :)

Tracie, thanks for your contact, wil contact her immediately... m quite gan jiong now, so afraid dat i can't get one CL in time.... sigh......
 
mamachan
you are so lucky... my gal... everyday does the same thing to me. sometimes, the 1st sentence she says in the morning when she wakes up is: mummy, don't scold me. *faint* as it i scolds her 24/7.
 
re discipline
JH is always a good boy outside but a terror at home. outside u won't catch him behaving in this whiny manner. he wants his face...

he talks like adult too. will say things like he is angry becos we never listen to him etc etc.and really gives loads of excuses...

yuki
yeah it's relly irritating when he insists on certain tv shows....dunno how to make him wait

mummies
i tried almost everything u guys mentioned, counting method, naughty corner etc but none work. the min everythng is over, he acts like he lost his memory and is back to his naughty self... nowadays he has this obsession abt coming down from high places..really irritating

esh mummy
congrats!
 
Esh mummy,
Congrats!

Tracie,
I din bring B along for this trip but I brot my pump along. Pump n freeze my ebm. If u are bringing Duncan along n he is still on TBF, then I think its even more convenient. Just latch him on. No need to wash & sterilise pumps. Dun have to worry about freezing & transporting back etc.
 
Mummies,
Me very depressed with J's comments last night. It had been quite sometime since I last bathe her. Cos due to my spotting and nausea, hb had been attending and bathing J for the past 2mths. Last night since I feel better, I bathe her. She told me,"Mummy, u very long never bathe for me already." And she look sad after that. I was very shocked with her telling me how she feel. Immediately I apologise,"Sorry J, Mummy not feeling well so daddy took over. Now I am better, I will try to bath with u more often ok?" She was so happy that she hugged and kissed me. Kept smiling thru'out the whole session. When she is out from the bathroom, she even tell daddy proudly,"Mummy bathe for me. No need you already."

Was very surprised that she is so expressive last night. Was thinking GOSH! She has grown up and expressing herself. I think I got to be more sensitive to her now.
 
may

wow, J is like a big gal already. My boy is still so babyish. I wonder when he'll ever tell me things like what J told u. He's still going 'train', 'umbrella', 'water', 'close door'. Haven't spoken in full sentences and expressing his emotions in words yet. My hb says C is like Prince Charming, every once in a while will break into a song. hahaha.

SY
Can sense your frustration. Gosh, it must be tough for u now, esp having to take care of 2. Do u think he might be trying to attract your attention coz of mei mei? I mean, when he's naughty, u pay extra attention to him. So if he wants to get your attention, he'll do something noti and it becomes a vicious cycle. Perhaps u should ignore him when he's noti and pay extra attention to him when he's good. Give him loads of praise and give him responsibilities like setting the table, washing the plates etc. The fact that he told u that he's angry becoz u didn't listen to him is enough evidence to show that he craves for your undivided attention.

I dunno but i realise that your complaints on JH came after JX came along. If I remember correctly, JH was an angel before that.
 
May - J is sooo sweet! must have melted ur heart.. hee.. ya, our kids do grow up so fast tat i wish they can slow down a bit... Cel is very tactful somemore, whenever i ask her if she loves me, she will always reply: i love daddy and mummie. it goes the same when HB asks her.. tis ger sure knows how not to offend any parent..and recently she keeps buggin our helper to call me at work and chat wf me.. she will tell me stories fr her books and refuse to hang up or sing 'new' songs tat sprout fr nowhere.. its reali a fun stage now, hee..
 
SY
I agree with Mashy. Let me share with you my experience. Charmaine was a angel and love being a big sister fetching all the things etc for Aden. Then slowly because Aden is still young, more time is spent with him so she felt left out. And she gets upset because for a full 3 years she has everyone to herself. Then she starts to get a bit naughty to gain attention. Same goes for my niece when my nephew come along, she has complaints from teachers which has never happen before. They felt threaten or they are just trying to gain your attention.

Recently Charmaine gets violent liao. Can see her pushing Aden, will scold aden " You are Ridiculous" " You always want to be number 1" etc. And now she gets upset when she has to clean up Aden's mess. And when they fight, I usually will keep the stuff and both dun get it. Charmaine will be upset with Aden and say it is all his fault.

I must admit I am more fierce towards Charmaine then Aden because I expect her to know more. So sometimes when Charmaine went out with Daddy, she will tell daddy how she feel and daddy will come back and tell me and I get to reflect on myself.

At times Charmaine still wants to be hugged , then she wants some time all to herself.

See if you can bring him out without mei mei sometimes and starts buildng the bond again to make him feel secured.
 
Hi SY ... that's the dilemma when we have more than 1 child ... and as what everyone keeps reminding, each child is different and what works for one does not work for another. My #1 is a peace-loving boy and like CL, I expect more from him than K. With my helper gone, he becomes my little helper and sometimes I scold him more than I should ... and I'm guilty of the fact that I'm unable to spend more time with him as before ... so I tend to praise him and say thank you. Not just to make him feel better but to mould him to be a better child, and though he gives in to K quite bit, K's at the rebellious 2 yr old age, and I've to close 1 eye to that... he'll bounce on the sofa and runs around ... I tell myself that I can't fight every battle. When my #1 was this age and K was born, I see that I spend more time with him when K takes the nap (eg). talk to him ... he may half-understand but I think it still register in their head. K's pretty mischevious but he'll say sorry and keep the mess if he knows he has to

hi god's child .... receive the email on the $$$ transfer. sorry have not got back to u coz have not check the acct, but it should be ok. many thanks for helping out!

.ky.
 
Esh mummy,
Congrats! You haven't posted for some time...
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I'm also a April 09 MTB. EDD is 30 Apr.

Re. managing siblings
oh dear, it seems like sibling rivalry is really inevitable. I remember my boss sharing her story about how she was very surprised when her maid said that my boss' 7 year old son told the maid that he 'hated' his 1+ yr sister. My boss thought her boy was old enough not to feel jealous. Anyway, she sat down with him and talked to him and all that. But our kids are so young now, it's a bit difficult to make them understand such things.
Gosh, makes me wonder how my mum handle me and my siblings when we were young. Between my elder bro, me and my younger sis, it's only 4 years or so apart. I do remember that if we fight, all of us get equally caned, no matter who started the fight. And because of this, whenever me and siblings fight, we end up conspiring at the end to hide the cane from my mom. Haha! Not sure how my mom divided her attention between the 3 of us!
 
hi,

sorry to disturb,i am looking for the 6 panel Haenim Play yard please PM me your price, condition and age of the play yard and collection place.
 
SY,
I agree with the rest that JH is probably vying for attention. Megan went thru that with Duncan and is now going thru that again at my MIL's cos all attention is on my niece who just started walking. I observed and could tell Meg felt left-out that all attention is on her cousin now and it doesn't help that the cousin is a crybaby who cries to get everyone's attn and everyone will start running to her. Worse still, Meg can be standing next to her doing nothing at all and she will scream and cry and others thought Meg bullied her and scold Meg. So now when i'm at my MIL's, i pay full attn to Meg and totally ignore my niece and told hubby to do the same in order to minimise the 'hurt' on Meg.

Of course in your case you can't ignore JX but this phase will past. When..i'm not sure, but it has passed for my case. Meg is no longer as naughty as when Duncan just arrived. Though, hmm, she still dun allow daddy to carry Duncan. It's really not easy juggling two kids esp when the elder one is at the age of 2plus.
 
Hi mummies,

Any baby here drinking GROW milk? I am looking for the Wall E milk shake that comes with the milk..... Willing to buy the milk shake maker......

Thanks.
 
Wenyl,
Sorry missed out your post earlier. Thanks! Ya, i'm bringing Duncan so i guess it'll be easier than having to transport back frozen milk etc.
 
mashy
u r right. jh's behavior totally went downhill since jx came along. the funny thing is he is perfect when we are out. wants 'face' as we say.

i try not to give him attention when he is naughty. even refrain from scolding so that he knows he doesn't get it. but he has this thing abt sweets and jelly that gets on my nerves. the first thing he does when he reach home is to ask for them. his bus auntie used to give him sweets or jelly everyday but i asked them not to cos he always eats them before lunch and ends up not eating lunch. so now he asks me for them instead and if i say no, he cries

CL
seems like all the angelic behavior disappears once #2 comes along..charmaine is a really sensitive kid i must say.

tracie
i m hanging there and praying that this phase will pass!

mummies
jx getting worse in her feeding. i tried the pigeon teats on her and din work. still difficult. she will scream the min the teats touch her mouth. and yesterday she idn even wan to latch or drink milk at all. so frustrated with her. and cos she wasn't full, she was whining away when i put her in the rocker. i got so fed up that i stare at her fiercely. she stopped whining and gave me a smile instead. quite funny.
 
SY

then what do u do when he cries? I always tell my boy if he cries for something, all the more he won't get it. Hehehe. Anyway, he's no longer a baby, can tell me what he wants so shouldn't need to cry. So whenever he kicks up a big fuss, he can totally forget abt it. I'll just walk away and let him cry. After a while when i ignore him, he just stops. Since he wants face, maybe u should just show him his teeth and that it's coz he ate too much sweets. Hahah, even though u know it's not true lah.

Hang in there! It will definitely pass.
 
Hi Sunny,

guess what ashley says? W ewere talking about talents and she said "Daddy is good at running/ jogging, Mummy is good at scolding people and megan is good at pinching.... Faint....

Hi SY, CL

I guess we always have to bear in mind to ignore bad behavior. I remember in Super nanny, one boy take away all the mum's attention cos he is very naughty. The elder gal dun get any so she become naughty in order to get the mum to notice her. Must always remember this.
 
yuki
haha.... ashley relates mummy to scolding people. so funny.

re: san zhi jing
my gal surprised me by reciting 1/5 of the san zhi jing when i fed my boy 2 days ago! so proud of her. thanks to my mil who diligently teaching her.
 
feel so tired. feel like just giving peanut butter & jam sandwich to C for lunch. Ok right? Have protein, carbo and 'fruit'. heheh, lazy mummy.
 
Hi mummies

It has been a long time since I visited the thread... after reading a few posts, I really feel that I should visit the thread more, cos the discussion is so relevant as our babies are about the same age!

But I can't really surf net in my current job now cos quite busy, and they banned msn too...
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I finally decided to enrol Clarisse to a child care centre, she has been telling us she wants to go school, hope she stays as enthusiastic next time about school & exams haha...
 
SY,
guess u have to be abit more patient with JH. When #2 came along and with my niece gaining more attn from my parents, Caleb also become more naughty. I guess its to gain our attention. So we also try to spend more time with him.
Hang in there!
 
mashy
can C take peanuts? Think he's quite prone to allergies right? Would peanut butter trigger any of that? Jam usually quite high in sugar content wor...unless you got those that has less sugar or something.
 
mamachan

he's alright with peanuts. phew! He simples loves his peanut butter and keeps asking for 'butter' (i.e. peanut butter in his lang)

i got the smuckers blueberry preserves. He seems to like it and it's not very sweet like most of those we tasted before. Well, anyway, got him a filet o fish from mcd. lazy mummy doesn't feel like cooking today.
 
mashy
so long he likes them, I would it's ok bah. For me when I'm alone with him, I'll just go hawker centre and buy rice with the cooked ingredients from those curry rice stores or once in a while, nasi lemak/chicken rice. For C's case, you can only get what he eats bah. So far my boy only fed with nuggets from mcd =P haven't intro burgers to him yet....hope not so soon.
 
mamachan

C's already into fries.
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Well, managed to bluff him there only a little. I put a bit on his plate and when he asked for more, told him that's all. And after that time, he no longer asked me for more, just finished whatever is on his plate.

So far he has eaten mainly hamburgers and fish burgers.
 


Mummies,
Any of you office staff strength is about 30? Can share wat phone system your office is using? Our phones in the office are erm..OLD so thinking to change the system. We do not need a PABX system type though. Thanks!
 

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