Who is the father

K

kittyfan

New Member
Hi
i'm quite lost now. Can anyone advise me on who has a higher chance of impregnanting me?
i have a menstrual cycle of 29-35 days. My first day of my last menstrual cycle was on 22 March. I had sex with my HB on 1st and 8th April, with bf was on the 5th.
As these 3 days are near/in my fertile period, who has a higher chance of being the father?
anyone can help? Thanks.
I have tried all the calculators which tell me results that both have equal chances.

pardon me if i have posted at the wrong place.
 


this is very hard to calculate who is the father and we wont know who's sperm can survive inside u longer.
 
remembered the wrong dates.thought should be already over the fertile period.
sad.gif
 
If not mistaken, your ovulation date should be 5th Apr.
But sperms can survive for 3-4 days.
If this is a boy, then should be your boyfriend's one.
If turn out to be girl, then should be your hubby's one if you dun have sex with your hubby on 5th Apr.
 
Hi iluvkitty,
Pardon me for being a busybody.
Why you wanna to have sex with your bf?
After married don't should we be loyal to our husband?
Feel that you are wrong at the first place lol..
 
iluvkitty, hmmm...yr case seems a bit complicated. I do not wish to comment on your personal stuff.

However, I have a solution for you. I presume you will keep this baby. Maybe for the time being don't tell your dh and bf about the pregnancy. You go and see doctor and ask at which week you can check the paternity of your fetus.

Meanwhile, keep a hair dna from each of your hb and bf and label it just to make sure the correct one. Pass it to your clinic to do it or to any standalone lab in sg to do it.

After you get the report, then you decide from there who you want to be and how you want to manage it.
 
niko, thanks for the suggestion and the respect / privacy given. there are more things than just the loyalty part.

However, my hb and family already knew about it.

I'm planning to do a paternity test. But from what i have found out is that i will have to wait until the baby is born, then will be able to carry out the test.

Does the test you mention do not require me to wait til the baby is born?

Also , can i confirm that if the blood group of the baby is same as my hb, at least its very cleared that it's his? we can only know the blood group of the baby til it's born too, right?
 
Hi
What if the bb's blood group different from u or hubby. What is ur bf blood group? Is it all different or same as either u or hubby? Do u think of the consequences? What will ur hubby and family react? Unless ur hubby already know the child may not be his and he is ok.
U need to think how to manage this situation. Cruel to the bb and ur hubby.
Thanks
 
iluvkitty, no need to wait till full term but there is a risk. ask the doctor to explain to you first. if you think worth to take the risk, then you go ahead else more or less you know who you want to settle down with, then you do the paternity test after your baby born if you wish.

for the blood group, does your hb and bf share the same blood group? you can wait till the baby born but there is a risk if your husband is a smart fella, then he will know if the baby is not his if the blood group is not under your and his category but if he have no idea on this then it will be okay. however, maybe the doctor will tell you too if the doctor noticed dif blood group from you and your hb cos they need to cover back side scare you sue them for giving you the wrong baby.

I have a friend who have a similar situation as you. When she asked me for help last time, I never really pay attention to her cos I was confused by her relationships. At the end, she committed suicide but she still survive and hospitalised. The baby has gone and she broke up with hb and also bf.

I hope by giving some advise here not asking you to commit more sin but to help you out temporarily and you choose your long term path in your life for the sake of the baby and yourself.
 
U can do amnio test from week 20 onwards to determine bb's DNA. Good Luck gal, hope things will find their ways to sort out.
 
However, my hb and family already knew about it

Abt ur pregnancy or your bf? Dun think abt it so much, take care of your health is the main priority. Baby usually take on the blood group of the mum.

Unless u r serious on ur bf, just treat this baby as urs with ur hb n focus to work on your marriage.

No points spilling the beans n make urself neither here or there. As for nw, focus on urself first, no point stressing yourself which might affect your health,

take care n good luck to u.
 
about my pregnancy.

i have been going through all the calculators, thinking of ways on what are my alternatives. i shouldn't have told anyone about this when i'm still unsure!!!!!!! stupid me.
i'm thinking if it's really not my hubby (hopefully not), should i just do 'it' before things are exposed in the later days.

lost. can't concentrate or focus on anything til i see my doctor soon.
 
iluvkitty, hugs...i don't know what to say now...but one thing for sure, you can't reverse back the history. you are not stupid, just that you were lost.

if i were you, i will see doctor now **alone to get more info first and decide later.

please calm down and think through for every decision you make cos i don't want you to regret later. a baby still is a life.
 
When u see ur doc he will do scan of the fetus and frm the size of the fetus sac plus ur last period dates, the doc will tell u when was the date u conceived. So tat is 1 way to find out.

2nd way is to do the ammio test. They can do DNA frm the fluid and tell u the sex of the bb as well.

Good luck.
If ur bf and hb same blood group then u can choose to keep this secret. But then u will hv to carry it to ur grave. Can u cope with all the guilt?

Also, u will treat the child differently depends on ur relationship with ur hb and bf.
 
What a mess! You have a hb and a bf??!!!

I hope you'll clarify things with hb and get things sorted out somehow. Yours/bb's wellbeing are most important right now.
 
@iluvkitty~ wads done is done.. Nw is looking fwd.. I agree w niko. Nw most impt is u n ur baby. He or she is innocent..

It wld b best if u can confide in a fren who u can trust. Someone who will b able to walk through tis rough patch w u.

U can always pm me if u nd someone to talk to
happy.gif
 
iluvkitty,

Based on luteal phase of 14 days or shorter, slightly higher chance its your hb's.

Nevertheless, only a dna can be conclusive and if you decide to keep this baby and its finally confirmed its your hb, may I suggest that you end the r/s with your bf and focus on building a home for the baby. Motherhood is a very time consuming and job that requires full dedication. I am sure that you can give that priceless gift to your child. All the best!
 
Iluvkitty, sorry u were saying tt u dun wish tt e child belongs to ur hubby? How come u can still hv intimacy w him then, during ur fertility period, without protection, twice?

But anyway, what's done cannot b undone. Do take care of urself n ur innocent being inside.
 
Iluvkitty, this is certainly a mess that you are in but being an outsider and someone who don't know you at all, I don't want to judge. However I do hope that from now on you will take good care of your unborn child and yourself. Good luck with your situation. I hope that you can sort this out soon.
 
wow!! saw some angry remarks here..

Come on frens.. lets not judge our fren here.. who are we to judge? she probably has her own reasons and we may not understand what she went thru here..

gd luck & take care!

Kittyfan: whatever it is, you have to be responsible for your actions. First and for most u must stay healthy and take gd care of ur pregnancy and urself. BB is the victim here.She is now your responsibility irregardless who the father is.
 
Interesting. I have doubt of your capability to be a good mother. You should reconsider bringing your child to this earth. It's really irresponsible to sleep with two different men within few days, where's your loyal towards any of this men? Some might say a messed up wife doesn't mean she is a bad mother. One who's this irresponsible for herself can she really make a gd mom? I have seen cases and no, basically they will continue to behave in this manner.
 
Hi iluvkitty, guess the right thing to do will be a paternity test for your baby. I think you should discuss the options available with your gynae. At fhe end of the day, how are you going to confirm who is the father by asking us in this forum? By taking a poll, seeing whose probability is higher? This matter shouldn't be handled so lightly at all! What if the general consensus say it's your husband who impregnanted you and blood tests shows otherwise? Then who are you going to blame?

Having said this, do know I'm not judging your actions. But you got to do the right thing for your unborn child. Hope everything turns out fine for you.
 
Hi kittyfan, do take care of yourself n your unborn baby. What's done cannot b undone. I always believe everything happens because of a reason. We aren't u, so it's not rite to judge. Just hope u can sort things out n provide the innocent baby the best/a normal life when he/she is born.
 
dunno what to say when i read this...kinda pity the hb since wife is cheating yet wife is responsible enough to not keep things shut and find out the truth of whom is the dad...but still husband kept in dark...
 
HappyBanna (fjcai) June 18, 2013 - 2:52 pm
dunno what to say when i read this...kinda pity the hb since wife is cheating yet wife is responsible enough to not keep things shut and find out the truth of whom is the dad...but still husband kept in dark.
Click to expand...
I stayed in United States for many years. The hispanics and blacks are common to have this problem. Wife suddenly pregnant, husband bodoh bodoh, 被蒙在鼓里。

To be honest, I have a friend kenna this. Got DNA tested, and divorce straight away.
 
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If you want to keep the baby, the only sure way is to do a DNA test. There is no other way to tell who is the father - scans and pregnancy calculators will not tell you the answer.
Ask your gyane about aminocentesis. But be warned it has a small chance of causing miscarriage.
My suggestion is to wait till after delivery and do DNA testing.
 
新明日报 6 July 2013
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哎哟...这年头女人同样出轨。丈夫这下真的是“买一送一”了。
 
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