My husband and I decided that we want a baby. but I'm lowkey terrified due to my recent miscarriage..
To the moms out there who have experienced this same sadness, could you give me any tips on how you overcame this phase?
Think on the bright side, having a miscarriage means at least both are fertile.
How advance was the pregnancy before the miscarriage happen?
Mine occured at 9w+ and about 7w+...
1st one I had it suction to hasten the process as it was not going smoothly. 2nd one was the night before first ultrasound appointment. It cleared out in the toilet.
I was sad then, but had since gone on to have kids.
It is normal to be terrified. Please recuperate your body for a couple of months at least before trying again. Do take folic acid supplement. If need to, can check out with a fertility specialist (but I did so only after two consecutive miscarriages and a whole year of fruitless trying). Can try taking the white phoenix pills from Eu Yan Sang to help with the recuperation.
I abstained from caffeine, sashimi, alcohol (normally I also don't take much of alcohol) while trying to get pregnant to reduce risk. Only when I was having my period then I ate sashimi and maybe have some coffee to "console" myself and to cheer myself up to keep trying the next round.
With the ob advice, I kept trying as my fertility tests did not turn any abnormalities. Once I detected positive, I booked another appointment to follow up and was prescribed with duphaston to help stabilise the pregnancy (at least the spotting reduce, but the pregnancy symptoms became more apparent). Only gynae/ob can prescribe Duphaston (that was what I read somewhere...) in Singapore... so I never try going to a GP and ask.
The trying and fruitless year I did take supplements, exercised, used fertility lubricant, monitor body temperature, but I don't think you need to go that far yet unless you also had countless fruitless attempts.
2nd (current pregnancy) also had spotting which cause me distress so I booked an appointment to see gynae/ob. The thing about spotting is normal, just that for me, it may turn into bleeding anytime was really nerve wrecking. The spotting/bleeding stopped around week 5. As a precaution, I still took Duphaston just that this time round no need to take for so long. My folic acid supplement also evolved into pregnancy supplements (way bigger pills).
I think once you see the heartbeat on the ultrasound, can relax about 80%... then once pass into 2nd trimester... can relax about 99%. Then is the wait for the kicking... once kicking started, it will become stressful again as Gynae/Ob will ask me to monitor how many kicks a day... this is to catch on to sign in case baby is in distress from umbilical cord entanglement.