Thinking of Divorce

Hi everyone, thinking of a divorce with my spouse for unreasonable behavior.
We have 2 children, 1 boy n 1 girl.
If we are to fight for custody for the 2 children, will the Judge normally give custody for the boy to the Father and the girl to the Mother.
Is that always the case or based on case to case basis on how the custody will be given??
Anyone know or can share your advise?

Thank you
 


I m also thinking of divorce but i dun think it is the best way out when kids r involved as it is going to cause them great hurt and impact greatly on their future. I think the judge will not separate the kids and they will place priority on the interests of the children. I also cant live with my child's father but am staying put for my child's sake. I have grown sick of him and i feel i have no more feelings for this kind of man anymore. He only knows how to criticise on wat kind of a wife am i. Jus becoz i m a stay at home mum, it doesnt give him any right to look down on me. I will remember wat he said to me until the day i die. I will bring wat he said to my grave.
 
Hi, it is not necessary boy to father and girl to mother. It's up to you and your spouse to come to a prior agreement.
 
Hi everyone, thinking of a divorce with my spouse for unreasonable behavior.
We have 2 children, 1 boy n 1 girl.
If we are to fight for custody for the 2 children, will the Judge normally give custody for the boy to the Father and the girl to the Mother.
Is that always the case or based on case to case basis on how the custody will be given??
Anyone know or can share your advise?

Thank you

I m also thinking of divorce but i dun think it is the best way out when kids r involved as it is going to cause them great hurt and impact greatly on their future. I think the judge will not separate the kids and they will place priority on the interests of the children. I also cant live with my child's father but am staying put for my child's sake. I have grown sick of him and i feel i have no more feelings for this kind of man anymore. He only knows how to criticise on wat kind of a wife am i. Jus becoz i m a stay at home mum, it doesnt give him any right to look down on me. I will remember wat he said to me until the day i die. I will bring wat he said to my grave.

Hi both, it is really no chances anymore to go for divorce... how about talk it out or go for some counseling course... I know sometime due to man ego, like to say some words without thinking through their brain that hurt us unintentionally.

Linwong, I admire those sahm, it is not easy... he must be feel content that you help him managed the house while he can concentrate on his career. I am ftwm, no helper & have to manage 2 toddlers. My hubby work shift, sometime say some words that hurt me too.. Got one time, I feel it is too much, I just talk out my feeling, after that incident, he "cut down" the hurting words, we even argue over $$... I often tell myself due to his shift work, just quick temper & let it go... don't put all the hard feeling in your heart, you won't feel happy... try to relax ur mind.

I start think that I shld save $$ for raining day, can't only wait for hubby.. so I start to do my online business while working full time, knowing it is hard to manage so many things on hand, but at least I can spend additional $$ for myself & kids, I feel more contented & achievement.

It is always good to talk out your frustration, stress... Good luck... stay strong...
 
Ladies, divorce isn't a way out and yr kids get traumatized. ... when u 2 cm together, both are cmg from different background n upbringing and opposite always attract. If u r having difficulty, u are not too bad cos no 2 minds think alike. No 2 fingerprints are same. Dun just shut yr door n close yr heart n lock him out. Do that n he goes to find a replacement n dun complaint after that. Every relationship can always agree to disagree. So, please spare a thought for your little ones and dun just give up. Divorce is a very difficult process n you and yr kids will end up wounded badly. Take heart gals.
God blesd
 
Hi ladies


Woman chartered does not help us. Pls try to work out yr marriage for the sake of yr children.

My humble opinion from my experiences now.
 
SG law is "an affair is not a crime " ... All yr assets split evenly ... it is suppose to be fair but in fact not. Of course, there are other factors like indirect contribution...

Many women thought that we r protected by woman charter but when u go through the system then u understand.

I do not want to elaborate but I encourage couple to work out their relationship.

There r mother with kids ends up no flat to stay cos bounded by CPF law, property cooling measures rules, HDB rules, no enough money to buy back his share... U though u won the case but in the end.. Yr kid n yourself may end up in street.

Then again, if the marriage beyond repair then no choice but to move on..
 
Mimicoco: u r right. Esp for stay home mums, the indirect contribution can nv outweigh direct contribution wh mayb meagre. Hence, the total contribution SAHMs allocated to is much lesser than compared to their ex-spouse. Hence, it's nv an even split. To hv a roof over one's head, SAHM will hv to buy over the ex share unless ex-spouse is generous enough to let the ex-wife hv the apartment. More often than not, a divorce becomes acrimonious.

Taking this slightly off tangent, do u think a wife should exit a marriage due to discovery of spouse's sexual fetish, amongst other marital discords?
 
I personally think, not to divorce as to keep the house while taking up a maint instead. Then again, the other party can trigger divorce too but at least time factor is in yr favor to make preparations.... on documents n evidence needed.

Do note that affair evidence is only valid for 6 months. If u going to file for adultery. No much effects after the 6 months.

Consider it very carefully... most importantly, work out yr financial status. Be very lean on expenses too. no more tai tai extravaganza... Eg saloon hair treatment n facial
 
Mimicoco: then perhaps, separation is the way to go as the couple preserves the assets yet hv the autonomy to lead separate lives. The only partnership comes in the form of caring for the children.

I'm vexed really, for my own happiness n peace of mind, I'm leaning towards gg for separation w hubby who has a sexual fetish.
 
Go with yr heart... Life too short to be miserable but then with right moral n clear conscience.

I guess we need to strike a balance on what we wanted along with impact n consequences outcome.

. Making wise decision is never easy. If u can't make decision now, I suggest don't make them. Let time tells u.
 
Hi everyone, thinking of a divorce with my spouse for unreasonable behavior.
We have 2 children, 1 boy n 1 girl.
If we are to fight for custody for the 2 children, will the Judge normally give custody for the boy to the Father and the girl to the Mother.
Is that always the case or based on case to case basis on how the custody will be given??
Anyone know or can share your advise?

Thank you

can i check what do you mean by unreasonable behavior?
I have two kids too and i find that my husband is very hot tempered and dont like me to question him much on his stuff. Hence i got angry and he will fumed with actions that scares my kid. I thought of the D too sice i find that there's no point holding on. Just curious if other guys are the same?
 
Divorce should be the last resort to resolve an unhappy marriage. However, it is an option to consider if there are valid grounds. No one can advise you what's best for you and your family because we can't see the whole picture. Anyway, there's this site you can post your legal query to: http://legalhelp.com.sg/ . This is free but they'll take some time to get back to you. You'll have to register at their site first.

Or you can call up Asia Law where they provide over the phone legal counsel at a small price, my friend says it's about $50. You can try calling them with the phone number provided at their site: http://www.asialawcorp.com/services.html . Just enquire how much it would cost you. May be someone may be willing to answer you free of charge? :)

Also do check up the various questions and answers on divorce at Legal Help: http://legalhelp.com.sg/search/index?search_question=Divorce

Hope the above helps. :)
 
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Sorry to jump in. .. first session legal counsel always free .. always look up free legal aid either listed at Family Court or go to Law Society, there are volunteer lawyer who will give you free legal advice, dun listen here n there, go to proper legal Advise ... verbal abuse is abuse regarless whether he hit you or the kids, it's ABUSE and a PPO can be taken out to him. Nobody need to suffer verbal vugarlarities in silence, it affect a person emotion well being n balance. And if he becomes physical , remember to go always Govt hospital or poly or your PPO is very weaken. Only you can help yourself, so be strong gals...you are the pillars for your Littles ones, als ...God bless

Another thing about Separation be it Judicial Separation or not, when it comes to divorce terms n conditions will always change , am one living example. So dun be fool. And in Divorce, pre-set divorce agreements can change time n time again, so dun assume it what you intend you terms of divorce will be how your divorce Wil end up. Not happening..it will change.

God bless
 
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