Manouhana n Joanne Mama,
Growing up my parents (esp my mother) always favour my younger brother. They spoiled him to the extent that when he wanted to quit school at primary six, they let him quit. He brought back bad company to live in our 3 room Hdb flat (20 years ago), they allowed. While I was studying for my varsity exams one day, he and his friends made so much noise I scolded them. He then pinned me down to the ground and said that he wouldn't fxxx me even if I opened wide. (That was the day that changed my relationship with him forever).
One time he stole bicycle and got caught by police, my mother very sad. He later got some young gal pregnant, they supported their (very short) marriage n the baby.
One day after his divorce, my brother came back to tell my parents he is marrying a Muslim girl. Again my folks forked out money to support the wedding. I already started working and since I was the elder sister, I bought the Malay sis in law 4 gold bangles.
After all the fuss and wedding, my brother went to stay with his wife and family and NEVER came back to see my parents anymore. He really broke my mother's heart. Although my dad didn't say much, I know he is sad inside. I remember my brother called me up one time to borrow money from me. When I said no, he hung up on me and never called me anymore.
Today I'm already a mother of two, married to a hardworking (but easily stressed) husband, and working in banking. And I share my landed property with my Hubs. My parents knew now that their daughter is better than their son and we very seldom talk about "my brother" anymore.
The funny thing is he works very near where we stay and we always see him in the shop where he works. But it feels right whenever I pass by, I just ignore and pretend I never see him or don't know him.
I'm not sure if my mum actually still tries to talk to him or not when she sees him in the shop. I never ask and guess I don't really care.
People born of same blood and same line can be so different because of upbringing (I was not brought up by my parents), education and environment. Esp education. Do NOT give up in training and trying to bring up your kids in the best possible way you know.
I have forgiven my mother those times when she sided with my brother when growing up. She chased me out of their hdb flat one time when I quarreled with my brother. I knew she would never love me the way she loved him. I hated her for a long time. Today, I learnt to see that it is actually a strength of my mum's. She is a fiercely loyal supporter of whom she truly loves. She dotes on my son, as if her own (to replace her lost son).
Don't give up trying. Never quit ok?!
Children are our chance to make a difference for our and their future. Don't give a shit about negative people who mouths rubbish, even if they are our parents. They are just ordinary human beings themselves, and some parents can be so fxxxed up themselves, judging from their utter nonsense and behavior.
Never quit.
she say my sister hdb bto at queensway very grand and worth $. But mine at hg not that worth. I feel sad cause i get it near her house. My sister always make use of me to fetch mum home cause she stay cck. Humm but well mum still think she better.
