IVF Mummies-To-Be Support Group

soon-to-be,

im feeling down rite now. Only 1 of my close collegue knew im preggy whereas for the rest i keep mum abt it. My office dun allow unpaid leave unless i consumed all my leave. Thus very sickening abt this arrangement.

hazel,

i also thought abt seeing GP, but only for a short period only as this MS will not subside that soon. I feeling exhausted becos i start work at 7am, need to wake up around 545am. At nite, cant get to sleep easily thus all the complication coming out, feeling lousy now.
 


when bb comes n we return to work, n we have take care of bb at night.. Worse if bb falls sick.. It will be tough also for us.. every day go to work with lack of sleep, work stress n deadlines, etc.

Am not trying to scare u... Unless u farm up looking after the bb at night to a another caregiver. Wat u r going through now is just a start. Some feel unwell through out the entire pregnancy, not just 1st trimester. A relative I know vomit n Puke so badly until she was hospitalized in hospital, she lost 7kg n when she was near full term, she has yet to put back wat she lost. I hv a friend who bleed the entire pregnancy n ended up having to quit her job to CRIB.

is a difficult path ahead. We hv to see how we can handle.
 
Nctgrace, short period of MC better than none right. Just go n take. N keep taking la by going to different MC. I wake up a few times a night n by 6am am awake. The funny thing is the timing I wake up is similar.

U sound to me that u r now emotional n depressed. some pregnant ladies get that due to hormonal changes. U hv to try to cope with this.. Think happy things, do happy things, relax n make urself happy.
 
hazel,

isn't it very obvious that we keep switching GP juz for MC. I really dun dare to do it becos i afraid of ppl gossiping me esp my collegue need to cover me and you need to see their "color" when come back.
 
Nctgrace, I don't know whether this is feasible to you. But a mummy fren when she knew I was preggy, advise me to quit my job if it's tough for me to carry on w my pregnancy esp during tri 1 coz she found it really tough when she was goin thru tri 1.

Have u tried making an appt with Dr Loh? Even u wan to switch gynae now, you may have to wait v long before getting an appointment w those popular gynae.....

Be strong....
 
Nctgrace,

what is stopping u from taking leave now? Only u can help yrself. Cry but not too often. It can lead to depression. Quit yr job if u hv to. It's up to u
 
Nctgrace, no matter is no pay leave or HL or MC from Diff gp, ur colleague who is covering u wun be happy n u still hv to see their face when u return. This is a fact of life. At least they dun call u back to work is good already.

My ex colleague from my previous company was called to office when she was ordered bed rest, on HL when she was pregnant with twins to prevent premature birth. That night she went back to office her water bag burst n bbs were delivered at 30wks... prior to that when she is on HL at home, her boss told her to lie in bed n work with the laptop on her lap! N her boss has children okay..

Wat to do, life is like this. They dun call u when u r resting good leow..

Fyi, I just got a call from hk colleague on work..
 
u dun wan to take MC then u take ur own leave. but u worried that bb born u dun hv leave left. then that time take no pay leave..

u hv to find a solution to help urself. You cant sit there n wait for dr loh or other gynae's email. though gynae is generous with MC, I dun think is fair for them to cover patients all the way also unless is those really serious vomiting n puking until patients r dehyrated. Docs hv to answer to medical board if they r investigated for giving excessive MC for no valid grd.
 
hazel,

my office will keep calling me when they faced problem, during my 3 wk HL, they will sms and called you without using their initiative in work. THus i got so pissed off.

soon-to-be, singapoh,

i know i got the right to take leave but if i consumed all my leave and take unpaid leave subsequently, when all these leave ended, then when emergency things happen i cant take leave liao becos im in a govt sector not as easy as pte sector where you can juz go to your HR to settle all problem.
 
Singapoh, employers can ask u not to clear 16 wks at one go... coz govt rules allow that. they can just ask u to take 12 wks n the remaining 4 weeks clear in block of x days in the next 1 year or something...
 
nctgrace,
wat i understand frm my sil who was in govt sector, it is easier to take leave due to childcare than to do so in pte sector. mainly bcos govt is trying to increase birth rate & be pro family.
do see gp to take mc or jus take ur own AL, so dat u can rest. take care of ur emotions else u may hv prenatal depression. (i had dat during tri 1 & 2).
when u pop next yr, u shld hv 4mths ML (which u can chk wif ur company, whether u can break them up to take slowly, first 8 wks is a must though), then 6 days CCL, then ur own AL and MCs. should be enuff?
 
singapoh,

i really think alot.

juju,

is def easy to get unpaid childcare leave in govt sector once you deliver becos im planning to do that also when i deliver in aug 10.
 
Dear Sisters, (to take note)

juz rec'd reply from Dr Loh with rgd to H1N1 vaccincation. According to him, we shld take the vaccine only in Tri 2.
 
Nctgrace,

now u already think a lot. After delivery is another chapter in life. U will hv more to worry. Like I mentioned b4, Only U can help yourself.
 
Nctgrace, u in govt sector har? i tot govt sector wld be more pro family?

Nevertheless, let's see what u can do now..jus consumer ur AL first...then when u get to see Dr Loh earlier, u can get HL. Hopefully u will get better by Tri 2 so you won't need to take more leave. During times of emergency, then u take no paid leave (u ok with no paid leave?).

As for after delivery, u delivering in Aug right? Take ur full 16 weeks and u shld be back by end of the year...."dong" for a week or 2 and then u will have new sets of leave for 2011 again..I think shldn't be a prob to take full 16 weeks lar..my gf who's in CPF took 16 weeks and 1 year no-paid leave to care for her 2nd kid....boss aso didn't complain but she, as a responsible person, did a proper handover before she went on maternity leave...

How? Will this work for u?
 
soon-to-be,

govt suppose to be more pro-family but also depending in which organization you are in. Im fine with no payleave. I already plan to clear all my ML once deliver, then CCL followed by at least 6 mths unpaid leave so prob will only be back to workforce in mid 2011.
 
Hi All,

I am now 28 weeks and I am having problems sleeping at night....anyone got the same problem and is there any advice? Did anyone manage to get HL from Dr loh from 36 weeks onwards?
 
Singapoh, Spiffy, Oxidised, Linda, have you engaged a post natal (malay) massage lady yet? Any recommendation? I'm thinking of booking 1 now coz I heard good ones are usually booked way ahead....
 
Hi ladies,
I am searching for a good CL for some time le, but yet to find good one. Any lobang?
I need one to help taking care of my boy who will be 14 mths this Jul, mainly feeding n bathing him. I plan to total bf my nb bb, so CL no need to feed bb at all, just do simple housework, cook all my meals, my hb's dinner too and look after bb n my boy for certain things.
My previous CL charged $1800 for 28 days, but she is booked liao, so I hope I can find one at similar rate.
Btw, I need a CL for 2 mths (56 days) this time.
 
singapoh,
some masseurs very popular. gotta book early de.

soon-to-be,
mine is Ida, hp: 9424 9829
no obligations. i jus find her good for my expectations. $50 a day, pay on daily basis, after massage completed. if u keen on her, pm me for details
 
hi bliss,
you didn't manage to get aunty.
sad.gif
did you ask her to recommend her friends doing confinement? not sure if she might know of some good ones.
 
Hi sunfl@wer,
I am ok, bz as usual with teng teng. No time to think about bb inside, haha! I am 11 weeks plus nw, hope all the ms will be gone soon once end of 1st tri. How about you? How's everything?
Thanks, I read those threads on recommendations on gd CL too, but really unsure they are reliable or not, coz I hv a friend who got a so called gd CL fr the thread, but was a CL from hell in actual fact, sent her off in a few days. I really hope to get a gd one from a friend I know so tat I could ask more abt the performance of the CL directly.
happy.gif


Lina,
yes I contacted fengxiang, but she is booked by someone in Jun, so cant do for me in Jul n Aug liao, too bad. I didnt ask her to recommend, coz she may not be sure if her CL friends are really gd or not.
How r u getting on lately? Your gal looks big in the fb pics, v cute. very sweet to c ur boy n girl together in the pic.
happy.gif
 
bliss,

oic..ya i also scare they not reliable..
u need 2 mths, very xiong leh.. is ur CL good?

me MS getting better, still puking and giddy, but not as bad as the first few weeks.
happy.gif
 
Nctgrace, since you will deliver in August only, then follow with 16wks ML, then u don't need your this year AL anymore what.. so now just take AL first if you are so miserable. Better take care then go into depression.

My mil told me she wants to go with me to the antenatal class to learn to care for baby. but i told her i'm not going to the class. So now just plan to bring her and the maid to the baby carer class at TMC.

Btw, I have not feel baby move leh. Last week can feel popping, but this week no. Can't wait to feel it move.

Anyone notice any different with belly button? my belly button hole is getting wider.
Last time i heard we can't scratch our tummy during pregnancy, but if itch how ah?

Hazel, today scanning?

I think Linda also right?
 
i'm engaging my fren's massage lady after my delivery next month... my fren really like her and she's singaporean chinese... she'll bring her own massage bed and towels.... if u all can wait, maybe after next month can give my comments on her....
 
Sunfl@wer,
I need CL for the 2nd month to help me take care of one kid when I am busy with the other one, since CL is more experienced in looking after bbs. I will not follow all the confinement rules for entire 2 mths, just for the 1st mth will do. I can still continue to take confinement food for the 2nd mth since there is CL to cook for me. Ya, it is siong as in the charges to spend on CL. But bo bian, I cant find other better options, since my parents cant help, I dont want to stay w my pil, and I dont want maid. I plan to look after 2 kids on my own after that. So the 1st 2 mths is like getting some help while I recover from the c section delivery.

My previous CL is not bad overall, just v chatty and loud voice. Actually I didnt really like her during my confinement that time, coz I was not used to having a stranger in my house and be so close to my bb and also to follow those torturing confinement rules. But now, I think I understand more what confinement is all about, so I dont mind her actually, since I know her pattern well too. However she is not free for me liao, too bad lor.

Glad to hear that your ms are getting lesser, hope we will feel better v v soon. It is really challenging for me to look after teng teng now, my mum often calls me and checks if I am ok. kekeke...
 
hi bliss,
that's true, even if aunty feng xiang recommend, might not be good. Hope you can find one soon. My gal needs to be carried all the time though we try not to touch her. She will cry pitifully when we ignore her.
 
Vi4n,

will break the news to my supervisor later. Tomorrow gg to see GP liao. cannot tahan, today really puking non-stop and feeling very giddy also
 
Bliss,

oic... ok thanks..

ya hope both of us feel better.. me already not easy to handle my MS..guess u even worse becos u still have to take care of teng teng.. jiayou ok, 1 more week for u to go!
 
soon-to-be - let me ask my friend who's malay if she has a lady that she's used.
p.s. really hoping Kelly can tell me the genders later!
 
Lina,
oh dear, so how huh? I also plan not to carry my bb too often this time round, coz I really suffered alot for my 1st bb, very phobia liao. Not gg to carry or pat my bb to sleep this time...never! Cant make the same mistake again.
 
Thanks Spiffy and Vi4n....

Spiffy, u still in office har? I tot u r seeing ur gynae in less than 30 mins? I'm waiting for 5pm to leave the office to go KKH. Can't wait to see my son...
 
hi bliss,
well, i only suffer during weekends as baby with nanny during weekdays. That's why i need to get a swing to reduce the carrying. But sometimes in swing, she will also cry. Maybe nanny is experienced as she can handle. Nanny will put baby on tummy and don't need to carry her.
 
I saw my bb heart beat n am 7 wks based on scanographer! Edd 25th aug...

I am so happy until I wan to cry.. God is good to answer my prayers. I really pray n pray everyday!
 
Congraz Hazel! See, you worry for nothing all these while...U there waiting for Dr Loh? I'm going to leave the office for KKH in a while.....look out for me, I'm in white top and pink skirt today...8)
 



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