Hi all, i Have been a silent reader throughout my 2ww... it has been assuring and hopeful reading all the posts. First and foremost, congrats to all the BFPs and good luck to all the rest. May God give us the chance to be a MOM...and experience pregnancy and motherhood.
I did my first fresh cycle last Nov 2008 and a FET in Feb 2009 both failed. Apparently the reason is severe male factor. I switched dr frm MArianne Hendricks to Prof Loh as I feel that Marianne didnt give me enuf support and treatment advise despite knowing the condition of my dh sperm count... it was too low that he had to give the sperm twice on ER day. Mariane shld have anticipated that based on the results of the sperm test and advised us to store the sperm or give him some vitamins to strengthen the sperm but she did nothing. Since it was my first attempt, I wasnt well informed. So frm that first cycle out of 17 eggs retrieved only 5 were fertilized at grade 3. I transferred 2 and froze the rest. Upon failure of that cycle, I did a FET in Feb this year, defrooze all 3 remaining embies and only 2 survived well so was transferred but still no success. Perhaps the quality of the fertilized embies were not good in the first place.
Then I switched to Prof Loh. I remembered our first visit, he looked thru my file then immediatelt prescribed my hubby vitamins then instructed us to freeze his sperm just in case on the ER day not enuf sperm. Lucky for us, even storing sperm he had to do twice cause the sperm really very bad that he need to storage to have an assured amt of sperm needed. Then we just take it easy and wait for the start of our 2nd IVF cycle which started in Sept.
I had my ER on 12 Oct retrieved 16 follicles, fertilized 8 embies 4 grade 4, 4 grade 3, had ET on 14 Oct where 2 embies transferred and blood test scheduled on 30 Oct. Abt 3 days after ET, I had a bad cramp. Was having my breakfast at 9am then suddenly got bad stomach pain something like gastric pain...i was wriggling in pain, had to curl my boody cause the cramps came in contractions and it was really bad, i had cold sweat and i cldnt take the pain so asked my hubby to send me to kkh 24hr women clinic. On the way there I threw up once. Reached the hospital, was told to lie down, by the time dr checked me, the pain subsided. He checked and said that it cld be reaction to the implantation but not nothing can be sure. I was prescribed painkillers that i do not need to take at all because once i reach hm, the pain was totally gone and till date I never experience it again.
The first week of my 2ww, I had very sore breasts and swollen too...and i had minor cramps only (nothing compared to the cramps i had on my first cycle that was massive cramping...really like my AF coming maybe that was due to prog jab). This time, the cramps were really minor. I am so used to having menstrual cramps that this cramp feels nothing. Maybe the insert do not give much cramping to me compared to the jab. Had my first blood test for prog on 20 Oct. Results came back the next day. Prog level is 42... minimum needed is 30. Was glad though i know that is still quite low. My first cycle was too low that they had to increase dosage of prog jab that time. Then after the blood test, my cramps just disappear totally. Now i dont feel any cramps at all, my breast no longer sore at all...just feel full and having and the bloatedness seems like forever there that i got used to the feeling.
SO i actually had hope for the first time...i mean this is diff frm the previous cycles that i had...and my mum keep telling me that she thinks i am pregnant. The feeling is diff. Then at 12dp3dt, which is yesterday nite, i did the HPT. It came out negative. I cant fake the feeling...i was sad...rally sad...cause i thought i wld see the positive sign...but the digital HPT clearly state NOT PREGNANT! I looked at the catridge and I thought i saw a faint second line (hahhahahah...who am i kiiding..each time also i will think i saw a faint 2nd line, hoping it to be positive somehow).
My hubby actually told me not to do the HPT. He knows how disappointed i will be... but i told him at least i can prepare myself for a negative result again for the 3rd time.
I know that shld my embies have implanted, I wld be able to get a positive sign... but i guess the chance is really slim. I still hope that the HCG is too little to be detected thru urine and that fri i will get good news ....
Thank you for reading my post....it feels good to let out to people who actually understand and experienced what I am going through.
I hope that my rainbow is still waiting for me after all these heavy downpours...
