is having confinement nanny necessary?

P

paperkhad

New Member
new mummy here. my firstborn EDD is in Feb 2016. i asked around and the cost of confinement lady during feb '16 one lady quoted $4200 which is too expensive for hubby n me. so we were thinking of managing ourselves during the month. i have an existing maid and hubby is able to work from home so we were toying with the idea of managing among the 3 of us. Any advice from mummies out there?

thanks thanks so much in advance. trying to prepare as much as possible in advance
 


i think if you hired malaysian confinement lady will be much cheaper. my colleague told me arnd SGD2.1K

personally i will not hire confinement lady because i do not like to stay with people, especially strangers. even my friends i also dun like them to come my house. so abit of socially impaired thing i guess. if hire someone to come nag and control me at my "territory", 100% i will ganna post natal depression... i pregnant with twins now, so most probably my partner will take 1 to 2 weeks leave for the beginning to help. then after that, would be all on my own.

you have a maid of your own plus ur hubby can work at home, i dun think you need confinement lady. unless you really need all those traditional tips on confinement.
 
confinement lady will b more expensive during CNY period.. is there any1 in the family can help you during tat one month?? my baby is due in jan2016.. seek MIL help, do get advises frm cousins and frens tat have CL we will be able to rest more.. esp CL will take care of the baby at night and bring to u during feeding time if you will be breastfeeding. however, similar to u the cost for a CL cover CNY is out of our budget. so decided to get mil's help in the day time and at night probably my hubby and myself to do the job...
 
thanks for the input, i dont have MIL and my own mum is not well to often travel and carry baby all that so we are really on our own. i'm worried that after delivery got all the aches and pains so will take time to heal so no CL like quite difficult. how long u guys take to recover after labour?
 
This is my first birth so i have no experience too.. how long it takes to recover probably depend individual.. do hrd frm my frens experience, normal birth usual they can get of the bed the next day.. csec need to bed rest abit longer.. for those who has complications(touchwood) may take weeks. but if confinement u are all alone with hubby, who is going to do the washing? hrd confinement not suppose to touch water esp cold tap water.. some catering co do provide confinement meals, you can consider..
 
Just to share my experience.
For no1, I did not engage confinement help as it was costly due to CNy period and My hb and I had grossly underestimated how tiring and difficult it is to take care of a newborn. Literally no sleep for the whole month and everyone in the household were so burnt out. Naively thought that babies eat / sleep/ poop only. My girl pooped ard 8 times a day, so our life revolved ard breastfeeding / washing / changing diaper/ coating her to zzz. Repeat this cycle literally around the clock. And also the dreaded colic , baby in tears I also in tears. I was crying with a crying baby in my arms.

Mum was ard to help but she also lost touch of how to care for a baby. I was lucky I delivered via normal birth. Can't imagine if c-section..

7 years later, I got preggie again. The first thing that come to our mind is to source for CL . Hb , me and mum were so tramatised by our first time wo CL.

With the help of CL , I soley concentrate on breastfeeding. Burping/ changing / coaxing baby to zzz all left to CL . I felt refreshed after confinement, unlike the first time , I was totally drained .

My viewpt is, its possible to not to have CL , just that its really really tiring . Unless baby is an angel or textbook baby- those eat/ sleep kind , Else it's like averaging 3-4 hrs of sleep each night .
 
For both my natural birth, recovery was pretty fast . For no1, no episotomy, can walk normally almost immediately. No2 with episotomy, wound a bit sore but not pain. However, recovery rate is v individual . I have friends who took almost a mth to recover from normal birth.
 
jotan33 said:
This is my first birth so i have no experience too.. how long it takes to recover probably depend individual.. do hrd frm my frens experience, normal birth usual they can get of the bed the next day.. csec need to bed rest abit longer.. for those who has complications(touchwood) may take weeks. but if confinement u are all alone with hubby, who is going to do the washing? hrd confinement not suppose to touch water esp cold tap water.. some catering co do provide confinement meals, you can consider..
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i guess for those who is following the traditional ways, it best to hire CL... imagine you need to "slog" the whole day looking after the baby, making meals, washing, etc then you can't bathe.. i think is very hard...

for me, i not following the traditional ways. i will still bathe as per normal, just go back to my original lifestyle. so i'm not hiring CL.
 
Hi JoTan,

I didnt have a CL. I managed it with maid, hb and my mom.

D main reason was I was due during CNY period, n it can b quite x during the period and not many CL wanna work during dat period too. So finding a gd one would really b an issue.

Having decided bt HB and myself dat we wont have a CL, we needed to plan how we will cope. We bought books on how 2 cook confinement food, plan how my mom can help.

During d day, my mom would come over 2 help us look after DD, while HB n myself rest. I was fully breastfeeding my DD, n hence rested when "not needed" We did all right, and I would say, if we have a 2nd one, I still wouldnt go 4 a CL.
 
I will have to agree with lala. If given choice, I opt for CL as it is very tiring for 1st month. For my 1st baby, i never get to sleep well for more than 1 mth and i nearly want to die. My mum is not very patient with me nor my baby and so it add more to my stress. My hubby isn't very helpful also. So the period total drain me. My SIL got CL and the first mth seem like a breeze to her. So if can afford, I will employ CL or at least have a maid ard the house to help.
 
miuratohkp said:
What does a confinement lady do??
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in my POV, another elderly to nag at you, force you to follow all the Chinese traditional confinement way and makes you irritated and you are paying for all these craps :p but good things is got people take care of your baby so that you can rest. got people prepare confinement food for you (even you don't like the taste you still have to eat it) so you no need worry about the food.

I think bottomline is whether you put yourself in higher priority or your baby? if u think u need the rest and you believe in those traditional confinement myth then hire one. if you think you can take care of your baby and doesn't believe in those traditional confinement myth then no need to waste the money because having a baby is expensive enough...

then again, I'm quite ang mo style and my parents also not traditional Chinese people. my partner is quite traditional Chinese though, so I guess he is a believer of those Chinese stuffs. but I still put my comfort especially hygiene in first priority so he kinda respect me for it. I try to argue that my grandma, my mum and my aunts all follow those Chinese confinement methods, but now they either gt feng si and bone or body pain even though they lead a healthy lifestyle. so I arguing that all these are due to old age. follow all these Chinese confinement will not prevent these old age illness at all :p
 
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A lot of times its wat u really want Sometimes even when u have d $ u may not find a decent CL Look around in this forum.... There r threads about how bad some CLs can b n others on how 2 deal when CL when opinions differ

My own bro went thru interviews wif CLs n finally paid a deposit 4 1 but ended d lady called as d date drew nearer 2 informed my bro dat she injured her hand n couldn't do it But she said she has someone 2 take her place However dat someone didn't turned up N d final person who came was someone wif no experience according 2 my bro They ended up asking d lady 2 leave n my mom n his MIL have 2 come in 2 help

Yes indeed when one decided not 2 have a CL family support is v impt Both fr hubby as well as parents
 
lala said:
Just to share my experience.
For no1, I did not engage confinement help as it was costly due to CNy period and My hb and I had grossly underestimated how tiring and difficult it is to take care of a newborn. Literally no sleep for the whole month and everyone in the household were so burnt out. Naively thought that babies eat / sleep/ poop only. My girl pooped ard 8 times a day, so our life revolved ard breastfeeding / washing / changing diaper/ coating her to zzz. Repeat this cycle literally around the clock. And also the dreaded colic , baby in tears I also in tears. I was crying with a crying baby in my arms.

Mum was ard to help but she also lost touch of how to care for a baby. I was lucky I delivered via normal birth. Can't imagine if c-section..

7 years later, I got preggie again. The first thing that come to our mind is to source for CL . Hb , me and mum were so tramatised by our first time wo CL.

With the help of CL , I soley concentrate on breastfeeding. Burping/ changing / coaxing baby to zzz all left to CL . I felt refreshed after confinement, unlike the first time , I was totally drained .

My viewpt is, its possible to not to have CL , just that its really really tiring . Unless baby is an angel or textbook baby- those eat/ sleep kind , Else it's like averaging 3-4 hrs of sleep each night .
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Hi mummy, what you encounter exactly happen on me too..2012 my first baby was born, me & hubby thinking to save money as it's dragon year & fall on cny so we though we are ready to take care by our own. Really a nightmare, baby in tear i also in tears, baby cried at night, sleept daytime. We really feel lost, my sibling worried, i might get depression, coz i beat my baby for the second week, coz she keep cried, i feel tension, can't sleep well, can't really rest..after full month, back ache, headache, stomach full of air. Second baby then we decide to hire confinement lady, I'm proud to said she's really good, take care baby day & night, cooking skill excellent. Me & my husband can have peaceful rest. Money can earn back again, our path still far to go..剩小花大.

Mummy, i strongly advise you to hire a confinement lady.
 
TiredWorkingMum said:
I will have to agree with lala. If given choice, I opt for CL as it is very tiring for 1st month. For my 1st baby, i never get to sleep well for more than 1 mth and i nearly want to die. My mum is not very patient with me nor my baby and so it add more to my stress. My hubby isn't very helpful also. So the period total drain me. My SIL got CL and the first mth seem like a breeze to her. So if can afford, I will employ CL or at least have a maid ard the house to help.
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hahahhahaha...mummy, absolutely agreed- nearly want to die. So next baby , remember to hire CL, like me.
First baby never hire, second hire, third (factory closing- die die must hire) :D
 
Of cos a little luck needed when hiring CL.
Ultimately it's a personal choice and I feel it's important to know what u r looking for in a CL . For instance I want a CL who is non naggy and modern. Popular CL does not mean it fits your own style.
So when searching for CL , I zoomed into the kind I m looking for.

When i contacted my cl before confirming her,i made known to my CL that I prefer to be left on my own and what kinda food I take/ don't take.

Luckily she is v ok and din not nag at my unconventional way during my confinement. I get to eat my Preferred food/ shower/ wear tees and shorts / and having walks ard the neighbourhood.
She is a relatively unknown CL but fits my style well.

In short the short 28 days is the most enjoyable period post natal days.
 
Had miscarriage last year and did a proper confinement even though it was a miscarriage .. Did massage and also had herbal soup as well for 21 days. I was very skeptical initially but sure enough my body was so much stronger after confinement and no longer feel cold with lower backaches (sign of weak kidney qi according to chinese sinseh)..

Am pregnant again and gonna give birth soon this time and pregnancy is so much easier than my first . Hence i believe that having a good confinement not only helps to build our body up again and prepare us for motherhood ! I have decided to hire a confinement nanny although my hubby and I really don't like to have stranger staying in our house .. My friends who have hired good confinement nannies all said that it's the best decision ever because they learnt the tricks to care for newborn and was able to rest when tired which helps with recovery ! :) hope this helps !
 
Clarityvc said:
Had miscarriage last year and did a proper confinement even though it was a miscarriage .. Did massage and also had herbal soup as well for 21 days. I was very skeptical initially but sure enough my body was so much stronger after confinement and no longer feel cold with lower backaches (sign of weak kidney qi according to chinese sinseh)..

Am pregnant again and gonna give birth soon this time and pregnancy is so much easier than my first . Hence i believe that having a good confinement not only helps to build our body up again and prepare us for motherhood ! I have decided to hire a confinement nanny although my hubby and I really don't like to have stranger staying in our house .. My friends who have hired good confinement nannies all said that it's the best decision ever because they learnt the tricks to care for newborn and was able to rest when tired which helps with recovery ! :) hope this helps !
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May I know what kind of massage or where you went to for massage after you had your miscarriage. I just had my 2 miscarriage this year and hope to find a suitable massage.
I kinda suspect the miscarriage may be due to my weak kidney? Cos my lower back feels weak and is always aching. Any diet advise for this?
 
For my No.1, my mum fully help me in my confinement. And my No. 2, she just help to cook for my confinement and help to look after my baby when she is not tired. In fact, i need to bath my baby and wash baby clothes myself.

This time round, i decide not to ask my mum to help, anyway she always told me that she don't want to care. So me and my hubby decide to cater for confinement meals and do my own confinement. Maybe try to rest as much as possible. In fact, i think during 1st mth, we still need to bring baby out for injection so there is no possible cannot go our of the house.
 
Confinement ladies are not always a blessing wor... imagine paying $4k for somebody who was not very good or didn't make your life any better.

I agree that help is essential in the first few weeks, esp if you have c-sect. But if you have the grit and tenacity, you can also cope with just you, hubby and one other occasional help/tingkat. Just lower your expectations on household chores :)

Having a nb is never easy either way. Some CLs don't agree to waking up at night, some don't cook, some don't do housework. During CNY itself, she may even request to go home, which is very understandable.
 
For my #1 & #2 no CL but i got a helper...my mum was a great cook.. i nvr trust a CL...the only person i trust is my mum..

i rather pay her the money & she do the job..
My mum cook for me, bath baby..th's it..feeding, diaper change etc all done by me..
Helper will do the washing & cleaning..
my duty is purely bb mummy..

i am always grateful to my mum..though she always said dont help but she always help out & tell me bb slp i also slp...dun need bother much..gt breastmilk feed no then FM..
my mum breastfeed us for 1 year..

FYI mine is c-sec for bth..i took abt 1 mth to recover..though i din rest alot but i dun need worry abt food & getting angry w a cannot make it CL..

It boils down to what you want eventually...doesnt mean a CL solve all issues...good if u met the right one..
a night.are if u met the wrong ones..
 
It is always good to get help. Period. Whether it's confinement, grocery shopping, meals, anything that allows you to outsource and rest. Now, regarding confinement, if you are getting a nanny around CNY period, the charges will certainly sky rocket! So,

1. If you are willing to spend $2-4k, depending on the period and how limited time there is, to get a confinement lady, do it! But research and ask for referrals. Get at least 5-6 referrals because many of them are booked very early - you need to call them as early as first trimester. When i called the few that were recommened to me, i was already in my 5th month and couldn't get the good ones.

2. if you are not willing or couldn't find any good ones, then you should start looking around for relatives or families (rather pay them, since they are more trustworthy).

3. If you have no one but a maid, try getting the maid to do all household chores and order confinement meals online. They are expensive and quite poor taste, but at least are nutritious. get your friends to drop by and help with grocery too. or order online. You need lots of fluids and tonics.
 
Hi, my advise to you is to get a confinement nanny. They are experienced and they know what to expect. Being the first-timer parents, you do not know what to expect and even though having a maid is an added advantage but some maid doesn't know what to do as well. Therefore, having a experienced confinement nanny will help you a lot. And during this time, you need extra rest, so I don't advise you to drain yourself out during this time. The first month after delivery for woman is important so do take extra care on yourself.
 
My 1st one was terrible, did things her own way and was very sarcastic. Made me very stressed out during my confinement period. She made my maid do a lot of things and even lied to us.

I just want someone who will help take care of baby and cook. No need to do housework as I have a maid. Those that are pro breastfeeding and don't tell me what to do (like wear clothes with long sleeve etc.). . I am not getting a confinement nanny to nag me. So basically, the more modern kind. Anyone got recommendations?
 
Hi mummies,

I would like to share my horrible experience with "Auntie Sophia", the CL who came recommended through this forum. It turned out to be a huge,costly mistake and we paid her the full salary after 14 days because we just wanted her out of the house.


She appeared to be very understanding, knowledgeable and polite over the phone as well as during the meeting we had when she was in SG. She claims to be pro breastfeeding which turned out to be a huge lie because she kept insisting that my breastmilk was not enough and that I was starving my baby. To make her life easier, she kept pushing for baby to be fed formula. Whenever baby cried which disrupted her rest, she insisted that baby was hungry and kept feeding until baby fell asleep. That was the last straw for us when we realised baby was overfed on formula. We also did not see any baby routines being set, contrary to her expert claims about setting baby routines.


She also claims that she is obsessed over cleanliness, yet she can leave strands of hair in baby's room, on the bed and all over the toilet which I have to tirelessly clear for her even though I was supposed to be resting. She has no initiative and does not even do basic cleaning up of the kitchen after she cooks.


I did not see any reason for me to put up with her black face and demands any longer. There were too many unhappy incidents that occurred which caused so much stress and anxiety on my part, and this was more than enough to warrant us to take immediate measures to get her to leave as soon as possible.


I am glad we made that decision because I was finally able to have a good sleep and rest immediately after she left, and even if it meant that I had to take care of the baby alone. My husband and I spent time to undo the damage caused and set proper routines for the baby. The lesson learnt for us, and hopefully mummies out there, is to be more discerning of the reviews and recommendations on forum.
 
Yes I agree with L54321, even with reviews (including close friends) not guaranteed will have a good CL. like my case, my CL is not as pro breastfeeding as she claims to be. First week she's here, I told her I want to direct latch or use cup feeding at night. She gave a whole lot of theories of she never seen a baby with nipple confusion etc and can use bottle immediately. Her cooking is terrible, too oily causing me to have a serious nosebleed. She only knows two kinds of soups, papaya soup n bu yao tang. Same like L54321, everytime baby cries is feed feed feed. I told her every 3 hrs feed but she refused to wake her up when it's time, claiming baby refuses to wake up. In the end, I hv to wake her up.
Honestly with a baby around, even with CL, there are alot of things u hv to do on ur own. Example when CL is napping, cooking, cleaning hse, she has no time for baby. If ur hub can take one month leave, it would be the best solution.

Another story I would like to share is, I've seen with my own eyes my cousin CL bouncing the baby up n down. Even though she's holding her head, she shld be doing the bouncing herself instead of bouncing the baby.
 
I'm consider lucky, the confinement lady i hire very good, really thumbs up :) Feeling joy during my confinement time, but when baby full moon i feel upset
 
I agreed wth littledot3 that reviews is never a guarantee. Review will,forever remains as an review.

I have two boys and I hired my two confinement nanny through this forum. Two nanny, not because the first one was no good or the same sort, but because the first nanny I hired 3 years ago was already fully booked when I called her.

Both of the nanny I hired was ok I would say. I have no major complains. In my case, both my nanny suggest I should substitute my baby with formula milk. Although very much I like to fully breast feed my baby but I agreed with her because it was true that my milk was too little then, I waited for about a week before I give in to her, but baby was crying a lot and jaundice level was very high, even my PD say I should give formula milk to my baby.
I have no issue with giving formula milk to my baby, so there was harmony in the house. She feed the baby at night, and I get enough sleep. No issue.

I suppose whether one is happy or not with their nanny or helper at home, a lot depends on one's expectation as well. And also, if two person can somehow come to an agreement when a disagreement occur. One may not be happy with a particular nanny or helper, by other family might find her good?! That is why in Singapore there are so many maids being transfer from one family to the other everyday!

The other reason why I never take the reviews here too seriously or have high expectation is because, for some reason we only get one side of the story,always! So, really, how can we have high expectation or even guarantee ? Haizzzz...:(
 
i think each to his own. like what Jasmine mentioned, each review is based on his or hers expectations and perception. no 2 person can have the same experience.
 
Will be first timer .. But I also don't feel like having nanny .. But I made some enquires .. The sales rep say until so scary .. What at night will always wake up .. No rest .. Health not good .. Etc etc. .. Anyway it is around 2.6k per 28 days stay in ..
 
Koala-Mummy said:
Will be first timer .. But I also don't feel like having nanny .. But I made some enquires .. The sales rep say until so scary .. What at night will always wake up .. No rest .. Health not good .. Etc etc. .. Anyway it is around 2.6k per 28 days stay in ..
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er..sales rep confirm will scare you.. if not how to earn your money?
baby will wake up every 3hrs or so for milk, this is quite common. health is all depend whether do you know how to take care of yourself. if you don't, you definitely need help.

for me, i have confident that i can take care of myself because i have been living alone for several years before married. i done my reading, research and wrote plans for my confinement food (give to my parents so that their maid can cook for me. my hubby just go collect the food). wrote plans what to do with my twins, etc. my hubby also took a month leave to acc me on the first month.

if you do not have any idea how to go about it, it's best to hire help.
 
pixie ng said:
er..sales rep confirm will scare you.. if not how to earn your money?
baby will wake up every 3hrs or so for milk, this is quite common. health is all depend whether do you know how to take care of yourself. if you don't, you definitely need help.

for me, i have confident that i can take care of myself because i have been living alone for several years before married. i done my reading, research and wrote plans for my confinement food (give to my parents so that their maid can cook for me. my hubby just go collect the food). wrote plans what to do with my twins, etc. my hubby also took a month leave to acc me on the first month.

if you do not have any idea how to go about it, it's best to hire help.
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Thank you :)
 
pixie ng said:
er..sales rep confirm will scare you.. if not how to earn your money?
baby will wake up every 3hrs or so for milk, this is quite common. health is all depend whether do you know how to take care of yourself. if you don't, you definitely need help.

for me, i have confident that i can take care of myself because i have been living alone for several years before married. i done my reading, research and wrote plans for my confinement food (give to my parents so that their maid can cook for me. my hubby just go collect the food). wrote plans what to do with my twins, etc. my hubby also took a month leave to acc me on the first month.

if you do not have any idea how to go about it, it's best to hire help.
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HELLO! Congrats!
 
pixie ng said:
i think if you hired malaysian confinement lady will be much cheaper. my colleague told me arnd SGD2.1K

personally i will not hire confinement lady because i do not like to stay with people, especially strangers. even my friends i also dun like them to come my house. so abit of socially impaired thing i guess. if hire someone to come nag and control me at my "territory", 100% i will ganna post natal depression... i pregnant with twins now, so most probably my partner will take 1 to 2 weeks leave for the beginning to help. then after that, would be all on my own.

you have a maid of your own plus ur hubby can work at home, i dun think you need confinement lady. unless you really need all those traditional tips on confinement.
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Definitely need. One woman didn't get a CL for first birth and was so traumatize; second birth first thing she did was secure a CL. She went through birth without epidural so she's the strong type yet she realized she needs CL more than epidural.

Those people talking down on CL is cause they want to save money so justifying their decision here. First time moms don't even know when and how often to feed and bathe babies.
 
Koala-Mummy said:
Will be first timer .. But I also don't feel like having nanny .. But I made some enquires .. The sales rep say until so scary .. What at night will always wake up .. No rest .. Health not good .. Etc etc. .. Anyway it is around 2.6k per 28 days stay in ..
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As a New Mom ...
The trick is DONT be a Super woman .... .be selfish for ur self and baby's sake .
There's 3 very important things you must focus on...

FirsItly : make sure you feed urself well and drink lots .. so u can feed ur baby .

SeCondly : ask pp not to visit fr the first 2-3 weeks ..because you and ur hubby and baby needs time to get aquianted and get into a routine .. eat :feed :change sleep : eat feed change sleep ..... Repeat Xxx times .

LASTLY & most importantly ... Remember from this day on ... you do not have DAYS Or NIGHTS .
Ur on call 24/7 ..
.SOOOOOO sleep when baby is sleeping . Does not matter it's day or night . I know babies are cutest when they are asleep but that does not mean u have to keep looking at them instead of sleeping with them .
Don't try to squeeze in floor moping / or laundry ... that can wait .
Eating and Resting ur body and mind is very important for a nursing Mom .
Like any machine ... Ur body can not function or produce milk if it is overworked or tried .

Once u and baby gets into a routine.. all will be WELL!!

Congrats ladies .. stay happy and don't stress .
 
In my humble experience, i dont have maid or cl. I was on csect. First time mummy.
I managed to cope well so far. Hb got 2 weeks paternity leave. For the first week i leave it to hb to take care of baby at night. We bottle fed the baby. I chose to feed baby with formula milk at night as my milk supply not much to pump. Second week, i start to slowly taking care of the baby at night.. to be prepared as hb is going back to work in a week time. My MIL helped me to send over food for myself and hb every single day. So I did not order any confiment meal from outside.
Taking confinement lady is up to individual. If u think u need it and have no issue in terms of financial, go ahead with it. If not, im sure u will be able to settle it without confinement lady.
Every baby is different. My baby is quite easy to take care during the first month. Eat, sleep, change diaper.. usually within a fixed schedule, about every 3 hours. Once my baby reach 1 month old, pattern all change. Sleeping, eating, pooping no longer like the first month. It is more tiring now.
 
I would rather engage confinement delivery service, and take care of my new born myself with my HB and mother.
This way I don't have to worry about marketing, cooking arrangement; don't need a total stranger stay in at my house.
 
The CL will do the marketing. It's part of the job scope. She will hand receipt over to show how much was spent. CL also in charge of cooking. I'm particular about the cooking skills as I'm quite a foodie, so will ensure she can cook well. Her job also includes brewing Chinese herbal soups for confinement needs at least one soup per day. My CL whatsapp me the photo of a list of herbs to buy, she told me to just get the confinement package at medical hall for 30 days I can show the medical hall towkay the whatsapp photo.
 
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Had 2 babies, one in 2014 and another in 2016. Both I engage CL bcos inexperienced, mom + MIL also nv offer to cook confinement food, think they duno what needs to be done.

Never regret getting CL, as a newly delivered mom rest is really important and the changes and weakness is the body is the worst that I have experienced. I appreciate that the CL cooks nutritious meals for me, take care of baby day and nite, so I can nap and rest and focus on making milk.

For my 2nd confinement, CL was much better than the 1st, my HB loves her cooking and yes she cooks dinner for my HB which is not supposed to be included. My no1 was a bustling 2-yo so when CL took care of no2, I had peace of mind to interact with no1 and spend time w him. I even went on dates w my HB as we know such 1-1 time wld be hard to come by in the future.

If financially you can afford it, get a CL. I paid $2.7k and I thot it was expensive. Then I realized she works 28 days, 24hrs... each day less than $100, each hr less than $5 lor... it's worth it. I even extended her service.
 
Candymoshi, yours sounds good.
Yep after giving birth, mommy is weak. Chinese traditions believe that mommy must have adequate rest during that period, besides teaching, CL assisting is another pair of hands doing the critical work of taking care of baby while your body recuperates for 30 days. With a good CL, you won't need to do anything. Just eat, and rest/sleep nia. Breastfeeding is already quite stressful in itself, especially if there are problems with latching or milk production. I cannot imagine managing that, while taking care of baby, meals, all this in my state after giving birth!
 
The problem is that there are many CLs out there lacking in professionalism..its not a regulated industry..if one can have mother/in laws help (proper help and not just come and play with baby) + hubby is hands on..actually that is very enough.

A lot of ppl have helpers nowadays, and that's even added help with washing of things and cooking.

The main things to settle are
1. food (cooking and marketing )+ cleaning up after the meals
2.cleaning up (including washing of things like baby bottles etc)-alot of washing
3.taking care of baby in the night.

its true that the reviews here may not totally help entirely (as every one personal preferences are different)
eliminate all those with bad reviews, and you still need to call through all those" recommended" ones. I did video calls with mine, and watsapp her often before meeting her.

I had a CL for my first.. couldn't provide her a room to herself--that caused much Friction (even though verbally she said ok before coming)--complain too hot, aircon couldn't blow to her side, no privacy..etc..

When one gets a CL--have to be prepared for some bad and some good. (but for me, cant' really imagine getting MIL to help though, won't there be conflicts too...)
 
Agree that there are a lot of CLs that are lacking professionalism in what they are supposed to do. Sometimes, hiring a CL can end up being more trouble than help.

It will be good to find CLs that are recommended by your close friends and families.

However if you are unable to find one, then probably you need set the tone right from the start, be aware of the roles and tasks that the confinement nanny will have to execute during the confinement period like:
  • Cook and prepare nutritious confinement meals
  • Baby supplies sterilization
  • Baby bath, bedding, and neonatal care
Here is a good to follow CL guide that can help with asking the right questions, roles of a CL to set the expectations and tone right from the start.

Hope this helps!
 
if u have someone to cook, bathe ur bb, u r fine. i bathe my bb after 3 days. my mil lives with us so she cooks n i don't want another stranger in the house to argue with my mil. :p
 
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