wasabi126,
I agree with what you wrote in the last paragraph. Just because porn is common nowadays doesn't mean it's all right to watch porn. Money making is what supports a lot of vices nowadays. Moral values go down when pple focus on how to make more money, and there is a lot of deceit in this world which a lot of pple are not aware of.
I see things differently from you in terms of marriage. I understand marriage is about supporting each other through obstacles, but my husband has never done that for me emotionally during my 2 pregnancies. My heart has died when I know of his betrayal, as I hv tolerated his neglect for 5 years, and I hv seen how selfish he is. My love for him was dying slowly during the 5 yrs, as he continued to neglect me and not taking my words seriously. I believe a person can still survive alone, after what I hv went through. I simply cannot forgive someone who does not appreciate me for what I hv done for him during courtship and marriage, someone who could not uphold the responsibilities of a husband and father, someone who chooses gambling to destress himself, instead of talking to me. He got addicted to gambling and I found out accidentally by glancing through his bankbook, and recent addiction to sex though he has stopped visiting prostitutes now.
I hv always been communicating to him but he is the one who thinks communication is unnecessary. I didn't handle my marriage well either, hence the failure. Living with someone who cares abt his needs first, and think the things he do for me is good enough to sustain the marriage. Ignoring my feelings, despite communicating to him nicely over many occasions. I was taken for granted many times and I am tired of pleading him to listen to me. There is a time frame for the marriage to be repaired, when the chance is gone and my heart has died, there is no way that it is going to be revived.
I treat him as a provider and father to my 2 kids, and nothing else. It took sometime to accept the fact that he has betrayed me and I hv to live with it for the sake of my 2 kids. Only time can heal my emotional pain but the scars will always be there til the day I die. I no longer cared for him, and I feel much better than those 5 yrs. We are just 2 individuals living under the same roof, fulfilling our duties as parents to our kids.