sally,
actually c-sect is not that bad, no need to be scared. now when i think back i know i am ok with having to go thru another c-sect again for any of my future deliveries.
the actual c-sect procedure is not scary or painful at all (at least for me lah) cause you are under anasthesia so you really can't feel anything.
it's just the recovery is quite painful and takes a longer time than a natural birth. because of the stitches, i found it VERY painful and almost impossible to move at all, let alone get up and walk the 1st 2 days. but then the gynae & nurses will encourage you to get up and walk the next day (approx 24 hrs aft delivery) so no choice you gotta do it.
the next morning aft the delivery, i could not get up at all to go anywhere, so the nurses will sponge-bath you in the bed, then you have to wear that catheter & urine bag thingy to pee lah. but by the 2nd day they removed the catheter so if you need to pee no choice gotta walk to the toilet lah. and if you wanna bathe also gotta go toilet and bathe.
i tell you, punyalah seksa when i have to get up and walk! luckily i took my gynae's advice and bought that tummy girdle thingy, cause it REALLY helps ease the pain when you wear it. and i can't stress enough the importance of having your hubby with you at the hospital practically 24/7, because you will need his help to get you out of the bed, help you undress in the toilet/bathroom, help you dress, and help you back into bed.
when you need to BF baby or eat your meals also, you will need his help. basically when you have had a c-sect, you will need somebody there with you at all times, cause physically you are just unable to do alot of things on your own.
i remember when i walked ard the hospital during my stay, i observed all the other women who just gave birth, and i told hubby that i can tell straightaway who are the ones who gave birth naturally and who had c-sect! cause the ones who gave birth naturally are all walking like normal, and those who had c-sect are walking SOOOO slowly, with their hands either on the tummy or on the back!
when you have had a c-sect, it is advisable to stay at the hospital for 3 days at least. i chose to stay for 4 days, but only because i wanted to be sure that i had gotten my BF right and that my milk SS dah come in, then i go home. i was VERY tempted to stay for 5 days, only because we were treated so well there and it did feel like we were on holiday (hubby stayed with me)! haha!
as for recovery at home, i would say it does take quite some time. for the 1st mth or so, i can't really get up once i am in a lying position (because the stomach muscles macam all dead like that) so gotta push/pull myself up. sometimes hubby also gotta help me up. then cannot do anything strenuous at home at all. even for post-natal massage, i waited 2mths aft delivery then i had the massage, because my gynae didn't allow it. he said minimum must wait 2 mths (altho some massage ladies will tell you 2 wks can massage already), because he said altho the stitches outside dah heal, but the ones inside may not have healed completely, so if the massage lady salah urut, the inside stitches may rupture.
hottiemama,
oh dear...i hope you start to feel better very soon...
my advice to you is, don't think about the c-sect experience too much or dwell on it. what's done is done, just be thankful that your bb was delivered safely, & is now healthy. and just start to enjoy him!
for me, i admit i did think about some of the comments i've heard other moms say before, abt how wonderful it was experiencing the birth of their babies, etc. and then i compared it to having a c-sect delivery. but it was only for a split second, and i NEVER allowed myself to dwell on it any further.
to be honest, i think it's really a load of rubbish lah, if ppl say that you are a good mom only if you deliver your bb naturally. this just doesn't make sense to me.
i mean, seriously, the bond a mother feels with her bb can't be measured just by the birth experience alone right? i think there are soo many more opportunities for mother & bb to bond aft the delivery, and sooner or later it will happen. i am living proof of it. yes, i definitely did not feel the bond with my dd the 1st few days, nor did i feel any maternal instincts kick in, but then aft we got home and i started taking care of her, tog with my mum and hubby, the maternal instinct just kicked in and the bond was formed. if you see me and my dd now you can definitely see how close we both are and how attached she is to me. that's why i am not bothered at all abt my c-sect experience and how i felt the 1st few days. what's impt is that the bond my dd and i have now is VERY strong, and that matters more.
alamak, so long-winded lah i ni!! anyway, basically, what i am trying to say is, don't think abt it anymore. period. just start to enjoy your bb now, and the feelings and bond will come naturally.