(2011/03) Mar 2011

bbaiden: It's really terrible. Let ur hubby handle, and u try ur best not to be too emotionally affected by this horrible episode.



Is the maid still with you (cos u said agency still want u to keep her for 1 night)? Search her body and her bags to ensure that she didnt steal anything. And dont pay for her salary for yesterday.



After this episode, I don't think the agency will keep her in S'pore to be a transfer maid (if yes, bless the next employer). If send her back, you are not obliged to pay for her airticket, since she didnt complete her 2-yr contract with you. I think you still have 2 FOC change of maids bah, have to decide whether to stay on with this agency or not. Though it maybe quite difficult to get refund. If move on to another agency, have to pay everything again.

 


bb rabit

no wonder we didnt see u yesterday leh....hugs you must have been going crazy with all the drama all day long



allets

i realised i got gynae checkup at 4 leh! do you think i can squeeze this outing in? abit rushed...but should be able to lah! but then again, must see how much i have cleaned and unpacked (my new place) by thur night. if still too messy/too much to do, i will skip the outing...



Mummies Outing (join if you can make it!) :)

Time: Next Friday, 10 Dec (mayb after 1pm?)

Location : Town?

1. Allets

2. caecilia

3. limlim

4. pixiepixel

5.

 
Airmex- U are wrong!! I sent her to the agent lodging and i need to pay 14 buck per day for her upkeeping!!!! Me gg to argue and not pay, since she run away, not i send her away.

The agent told my DH, need to find her a new owner within 14 days. I also blessed tt person! The agent also tell me tt if no one wann her, i have to pay for her airticket! WTH. This is the last time tt i m using agency which pay all UPFRONT. My last agency all better than this.

 
BBaiden: I think under the contract (hope it's the same contract that we employers sign), we are obliged to pay boarding fees (but there's a limit). But we are NOT obliged to pay air ticket under contract law. Dont pay this stupid agency wrt airticket, they are just trying to smoke their way and cut back their losses. Also, take back the maid insurance refund (since it's < 6 mths)

 
Chen- U can PM me if u wann to know. They mite be good for simple case, not for such complex issues. Yest 1st time i got so many police in my house, me making report, searching for maids on our own, if limited and bite and pieces of info.

 
My agency also tried to pull the stunt with me, asking me to pay the air ticket for my previous maid (with us for 8 mths). I firmly said no as we should have no responsibility since we had transferred her out of our service. The agency also LL...

 
Anyway, cool it.. cool it..



let hubby handles the matter, just remind him not to bow to pressuring tactics, as longa s $$ is with you, the agency cant possibly forcefully dig out more $$ from you.

 
airmez

u should be our official maid contract/do's & dont's/advisor....

i hereby appoint u..............................

 
AirMez,



we're not obliged to pay air ticket? How come 3 mths ago my sis sent back her maid and the agent insisted that we need to pay the maid for air ticket.. and said is in the rule and regulation.

 
Airmex- That wat i did wif my last agency. Anyway, they also agree. They made the maid paid.

I told my DH abt wat u said. He said he will settle wif him, as long as i can calm down n be less stress.

 
I thought we are not obliged to pay the maid's air ticket since she did not finish her contract with us? I just stood very firm, f*** the agency upside down for giving me lousy quality and trouble for changing/retraining maid. The agency bobian in the end, and said ok.

 
boymum: your sister's maid was with your sis for 2 years and completed her contract, izzit? Then 好来好散loh, I paid the air tickets for my maids in the past.

 
Airmez,



that's what i thot also.. how come we need to pay them for not finishing the contrac with us?? i thot the air ticket is the 'bonus' for them if they end their 2 yr contract with us. But, the agent said another way round, said is our responsible and it's in the rules and regulation. So end up, my sis just get the budget air ticket for the maid to go home.

 
no.. only 7 months nia!! cos she's such a violent maid.. make funny things and even fight with my maid for nothing.. end up, police case and she fainted in the kitchen and sent to hospital.. So, my sis immediately sent her back to agency. Damn scarry.. dun even dare to keep her for one more day!!

 
haiz, toking about stress hor, recently i oso quite stressed...



let me state that im:-

1. preggy

2. hiring new maid

3. arranging new childcare centre for my #1

4. renovating/shifting into my new house



so many things to handle rite...

and most of the time, im all alone doing all these stuff. imagine next wed-fri, im cleaning the new house and unpacking cartons, moving furniture ALL ON MY OWN coz hb started new job and cannot take leave.



worst thing is now living with mil. she very grumpy n moody recently, and she treats me vs treat her children very obvious. she will ask my hb if he wants to eat or drink this but never asked me...even though im preggy...get scolded by her easily but she never scold my hb etc kind...jialatz rite



i feel so alone, recently...

so much to handle



mummies who know me well will know that i am actually very positive and mentally strong. but these 6mths of activities draining me leh...nowadays i get defeated easily



heng my sanity still in check, can come into forum and chat, forget about the 10 thousand tasks i have on hand...



if you all ask eh ask ur hb to help lar...my hb very dense n tut tut kind so he can only listen to me ranting LOL and i dont trust him with all the coordination....ask him to do 2 things he can do 1 and forget about the other. in the end screw up things. might as well i do. it proves really...man cannot multitask...



i tell him the stuff im taking on hand, he listen liao oso stress, let alone do it!!



ok end of rant

 
boymum: wah, also soo drama ah... then, I'm afraid ur sister kenna kedok liao loh. My current agency asked me for $100+ for maid's airticket home, dunno why so cheap, skaly just send her to Batam, and ask her to journey back hometown via donkey. Anyway, none of my biz lah for tat previous maid.

 
Ya.. if finish 2 years, we, employer most willing to pay them.. my previous 2 maids also i paid for them, cos first one finished 2 yrs and second one finished 3 yrs with me.. of cos, i'm very willing to pay them as they make their efforts to work and that's what they deserve for in their hard work.

 
so my point is, who is living in the west, got maid to spare me for 1 day (wednesday & need her for 4hours only) to help me clean up?

heehee i pay good money..........keen?????



my maid (share with hb's siblings) stationed at mil place. my mil dun want to pass her to me coz lots of tasks for maid to do daily...



got maid oso like no maid like that one leh

 
pixie: get a part-time maid. One-off type. Last time the rate is $10/hr (think shld ve increased). Cos sharing of maids is illegal in s'pore, unless the other employer doesnt mind, and keep it hush-hush. But u neber know the stupeed maid, cos the maid may turn around and complain to the embassy that work overload (even though she has been compensated with 'angpao' $$).

 
airmez

yah im amazed too at the amount of stuff. and i need to work, boss is on long leave, more responsibilities. got #1 to take care of when i reached home....

heng moved house liao. coz previously i still need to juggle housework!

 
Airmez,



ya. drama for the silly maid!! We found out, she has 5 handphones with her in my sis's house.. and everyday she'll just stay at home with my sis's baby. We also dun know how can she managed to get so many hp from outsider!!! Power right?? hahaha.. my sis said.. what kind of BIG business she's doing and need 5 hp???!!!

 
cant comment abt maid since i dont have 1.



pixie - how abt hire a hrly maid? i know an auntie who comes to my current house twice a mth to do housework. think is $10 per hr. i can ask my MIL to check if she is available if u r interested.

 
airmez

i got my usual china mama p/t cleaner. thing is, she is not very clean. her standard dropped liao. i rather not get her to my new place. coz after she left i have to "pick up her leftovers" u get what i mean?



i know its illegal...haiz...talking about this; u reminded me, my mil say check with my maid if she is keen to pop by next weekend to help me or not. havent get back to me....

 
bbrabit: try to not be so stressed and leave those diff issues to your hub?





pixie: wah...u are also a superwoman, not easy handling so many things without help..

 
won_mummy

keen!! its next wed. as many hours as the auntie can....

i know these hrly aunties all booked up very fast one leh

most impt...clean or not?

mine is clean until...close 1 eye still passable!

what for ask her to come over rite

 
2ks

thanks for the encouragement...

can you imagine, my hb was ZZZZZzzz while i was still packing late into the night last week....winner hor.



i need 1 month worth of MC :p :p :p

 
pixie - ok. called home le. MIL not in, will call auntie later to check. hmm...auntie cleaning is good. except that she a bit rough. lol. she is not working de. young grandma, work part time for extra income only. sms u later once i have updates.

 
pixie, december is festive month, try to relax and enjoy... hee.



gosh, domestic helpers can really be problematic. I shall try doing w/o one for as long as possible. rach's one coming today, hope her's good and that we're not frightening her.

 
aiyoh, BB rabit, hope you are ok and feeling better!



hmm.. as for air ticket w maid (if youare sending her back, I think you are obligathed to pay roght BUT BUT if she runs aways or do anything funny, you can argue not to pay ba!



Pixelpixel, dun overworked yourself too ah! If need, I also got a contact for the China part time cleaner $10/hr. SHe cleans well but ironing sucks.... but I'm ok with her, I will call her as & when I need her. PM me if you want her contact ba!



Airmez: Since you are the maid guru, do you think it is neccessary to have a miad agency as the middle person when I'm enagaging a transfer maid?

This maid has been w my granny for 5 years, no experience in bb but I'm willing to take her, as she seems alright? Hb doesn;t want to pay agency fees for the transfer, so we are thinking of doing ourselves @ MOM, your advice?

 
Pixel ,



Take it easy... YOu are capable that it is why everything u handle.



Your hubby thinks that u can handle loh. Sometimes have to remind them u need help..

 
bbrabit, wah such drama ytd, you must be traumatised.. sayang! Although i don't have a maid, i agree with airmez u should not pay for the airticket leh, cos the maid caused u so much trouble and even made your granny go hospital - in fact i think the agency should give u some form of compensation lor!! In any case, do relax and let your hb handle it. Bb more important. And dun worry too much abt bb not kicking - my gynae says when we r moving around, bb like the rythmic motion and won't kick. When we r sitting or sleeping, no motion then bb will kick (like how new born babies prefer to be carried and rocked when they r crying?) So think ytd cos u moving around so much that's why she never kick lor. :)



Pixie, wah u also another overloaded preggie. Break down the 1001 things u gotta do into smaller tasks and get your hb to help (maybe with a checklist so he cannot use as excuse that he cannot multitask?). Think of your lil one inside and your new beautiful home soon, it'll all be worth it! :)

 
Sorry Pixel, never get to read the end of yr message. ..



I do agreed men cannot multitask. My hubby also. In the end, better do things on our own..



But sometimes i think they purposely dont it properly.. When my mil is around, my hubby do everything.. Without my mil, my hubby just dont do anything at all.

 
pixel: if my hubby does that, i will swipe his cc and buy myself something...wahahaha...

then i tell him, its my reward for multi tasking..



i can understand how u feel lor...cos when i was renovating my house, i also the one juggling everything...but that time not pregnant la..

but at least if appt during office hours, he can sneak to house to check la..

that is my only consolation...

 
tweety

^5

if my mil is at home, he will let my mil take care of #1

but if he is alone with #1, then he will take care of my boy...

i think men cheat all the time on chores :)



audrey

yes, im reaching the end of journey. after end of next week, i should have 1 major item off my mind, yay!!



2ks

unfortunately, i very independent until (like what tweety said)....my hb dont know i need help. so my cc all under my own name. we seperate our finances. but come weekend, all the eating out i dig from his pocket heehee...

so...this weekend i must eat something good again... on his tab kakakakaaa

 
Tres: I did it myself once (but that's agesssss ago) without the agency help. I found a maid in indonesia with my indo fren's recommendation. My fren helped me with the fixing of her passport (i dunno anything abt this part). I just went to MOM and Tanjong Pagar (forgot go there for wat) and insurance thing. Instructions by MOM were very clear. I remembered the whole thing was quite manageable. Since your maid is already in S'pore, I think should be quite easy bah. Call up MOM to see what needs to be done.

 
pixiepixel: same...i also think i am quite independent...i managed most of the things at home...hubby only know how to ask...

men are very straight...my hub just follow what i do...if something crops up, he ka lang ka bok...

irritating... just not flexible when come to household stuff..

think cos they rely on us

 
hubbies CAN do things one... give them a to-do list and a deadline. Dun let their blur or puss-in-boots look fool you. They are just taking the easy way out. Dun fall into the trap of 能者多劳！！ [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
Since we are able to delegate work to our male subordinates in office, then it mean we can train our hubby in the same way. Of course, attitude less professional, more feimine/helpless lah...

 
AirMez, $100+ for maid's airticket home, dunno why so cheap, skaly just send her to Batam, and ask her to journey back hometown via donkey.



Been laughing over this over and over again!!



BB, let your Hubby handle, he dun wan you to feel so stress out le.

And time being with this maid out, I think you can have some peace for now.

How is your Ah Ma then?

 
Hi pixie,



agreed with Airmez, hubbies can do things de.. but maybe you just need to be patient with them, let them handle 1 task at a time. give them specific instruction like this box of things, arrange them into this room, clear the rubbish in the kitchen etc.



but your expectation cannot be too high lah.. standard passable can liao.. than when you got more time on hand, then slowly rearrange loh.. the most impt is to clear all the boxes of things into their respective location (so that you wun feel so many things to do). after that than slowly rearrange loh..



if your hb give you the "i dunno how to do attitude", tell him the house belongs to both of you. He should contributes and help!



than when you clear all the things liao, you will feel much better.. after which, demand a wonderful treat from your ah lao.

 
BBRabbit, i feel for you.. at this stage you gotta take things easy as u are preggy now.. dun let tis matter affect u badly.. hope ur grandma is fine..



Btw mummies, i've checked with Strip there is no special rate for a big group of us doing Bwax.. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]

 


yo mummies

thanks for the tips

actually my hb started off from dunno anything to doing something. it really took me a long long time to train him. he was the same as his bro (twins). i see his bro now (still never changed) and him, i see a vast difference.

my ah lao can never match my expectations when it comes to the household but at least he improved a lot liao. but still, quite tut tut and ka lang ka bok....

 
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