(2008/09) Sep 2008


Mei: Cute cute cute! Are they for your little one? Do you know how we can launder these toys to keep them relatively dust free? Cos I've got toys too...but they've been collecting dust. Can send to laundry shop?

Lovebug: it's not a pleasant situation to be in at all! But like the other mms/MTBs here have suggested, do look for a CL or at least get some food catered. Trying out the trial food is not a bad idea cos you never know how you may take to the food. even having a CL doesn't guarantee you will like the food but she will definitely provde help in terms of bb caring.

Will you have some friends who are able to come by to help you on a rotation schedule? Or what about asking your parents and in-laws if they can take shifts to help you with household chores e.g. laundry, boiling water for you to bathe etc? HOpe you find a workable solution soon!

From what i know, ML can be broken up but only for the third month. But do check with your office administrator. They should have all the info. Plus, some Ps are really nice, and they can make exceptions.

as for your q abt whether confinement is necc, it really depends on what you understand by it, and your personal beliefs. Some ppl really believe in the traditional Chinese confinement - no bathing for X days like Zoe tay kind. Some are moderate in this. Some others like my SIL didn't take confinement food, just balanced diets. She even cared for her bb herself, laundry and all from the second wk on cos i think she was more stressed by external help than helped. So it is up to you - what you are comfortable with, what you need and even, financial considerations.

And don't you mean, you can cook tt is why you are more fussy? You are home ec teacher, sure will have higher expectations!

L'l CY: Oh! Didn't know your domestic helper left! No wonder you are sooooo busy! babies can't do much? Then good la, mummies can do more! Hahah.


Storeberry: Could it be that you're sitting too long? I get backpain if i sit too long.

Alabone: Long time no see like that! All that walking around in classes is good for you! Getting exercise! Unlike me...sititng in front of laptop most days. hehe.
 
Crayonshin: Thanks for info!

Cloud: Smells nice ah? You tried? Soapy or not? hehe. I think shall go buy a travel set and trial it first. I like J&J bb stuff but not so sure abt Top-to-toe cos it looks so dry. I like the J&J baby milk bath and sleepytime ones. But the idea of using separate shampoo puts me off wanting to use them.

Flos: Any idea how much Mustela bb bath and shampoo costs per bottle? Did you get yours on discount?
 
storeberry
My hubby cut out the designs the day before & we finished sewing & stuffing the bear the whole of yesterday evening, around 4 hours.
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shazz, alabone & xuanting
Thanks! I am so on the ball over this doll making project now.. will make more!
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SarahMay
Yup.. making all these dolls for my little one. I intend to buildup a collection.
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Most toys can be machine washed.. or you can send to the laundry shop... I know the laundry shop at Tampines Mall basement provides this service.
 
hello sarahmay - I started my 28th week this week. I am conscious (actually my hubs is more than me) whether there are movements throughout the day but no time to count la. Like I also do not practice the kegel religiously. WHERE GOT TIME? :D

Limay - my baby is 1.4 kilos. I think he is going to be slightly on the bigger side. Do you find yourself gaining more weight now that we are starting our 3rd tri?

Flos - ur HR very bad la. If u can cham siong with your boss, HR doesn't watch who is in and out so as long as ur boss is ok, u shouldn't need to submit / justify anything to HR right?
 
storeberry,
I have accepted yr invite in Multiply
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shazz,
thanks for taking the trouble to post the spree stuff to me. appreciate
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flo,
like u, we dont take any family loans. Paid for the entire wedding, house reno (ex and new hse), car etc ourselves. I believe in depending upon ourselves for the things we want in life. I am just happy that my parents keep the money for themselves so that they can have a stress-free retirement. I still contribute monthly to my folks..small token but its heartfelt
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welcome back wingkei, did u have a good trip?
 
cloud,
i also bought tollyjoy nappy liner and nappy diaper. cheaper than pigeon and feels quite soft..
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lovebug,
u reckon ur hubby can help cook the confinement food? eg. steamed fish, soup, red dates tea (simple dishes)? Do you have siblings or relative who would help out for a mth?
 
Thanks, bacon&egg. Let's just say, I try to have as good a time as I can, under the circumstances, and with so many restrictions. I am not even allowed to look at birds on the streets!

Ava was right, it IS hard to fall in love again with ILs there. I have to admit that there are times that I felt so redudant.
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I thought they may have been happier without me there. My hubby took care of his parents mainly, make sure they are comfrotable, try to find food that they like to eat, etc. He would walk together with them way infront of me, and talk to them happily, and kept asking them to pose for photos. I really felt like an extra. It was so frustrating that I gave up taking photos and I think his mom noticed, so after that, whenever he took photos of them, she would ask us to stand in position and take back for us. Otherwise, we would probably not have any photos together for this trip. haiz....
 
Flos
I'd listen to Lanolin if I were you..she is a HR queen.

Wingkei
welcome back...! As Bacon & Egg said, at least ur MIL a bit more zi dong than your hb! hahaha...maybe can try to get her to talk to your hb...
 
bacon&egg, only bought 1 set of clothes cos hubby din wanna buy. And MIL was not very supportive of buying too. I was the one who insisted on buying that one set.

Well, now my hubby uses the excuse that my MIL treats me SO nice, I have to treat her nicer. I really wonder what he wants? For me to hug and kiss her everytime I see her, how much nicer does he want me to be? Just came back from trip and we already had our first argument.
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<font color="119911">Mei (meie) - ha, the bear is equally cute! I am sure ur baby will love it
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wingkei (wingkei) - welcome back! Where did u guys go for the 1 week holiday? Sounds like ur hubby is really a mama's boy - seems like he is married to his parents rather than u!

MATERNITY LEAVE:
Mommies - do check if this is calculated as a full 3 months. I asked my HR, and it turns out that for us, its just 84 days (inclusive of weekdays &amp; public holidays), which works out to less than 3 months. So for my case, I am delivering on 30th Aug, but adding 84 days brings me till mid (not end) Nov. Taking another 20 days of annual leave (clearing from last year) &amp; will only go back to work around Xmas time.</font>
 
Ava, I think that will be a bit difficult.

Anyway, I wonder, when you all go out with your hubbies, do you walk together with your hubby or does he walk way ahead of you? And when taking cabs, etc, he will take the front seat, leaving u alone behind?

I am so frustated with him. He would always walk way ahead of me, even during the trip. I always feel that if someone just snatched me from behind, or if I fall down, he wouldn't know. There was once I fell, that was before I got pregnant, and he really didn't know. That was how far ahead he was walking.

Then now, he is blaming me that I would like him to walk with me and sit with me on the backseat of the car. He says that it makes his parents feel like strangers, that I don't like to sit/ walk with them, etc. What kind of logic is that? I really don't get it.
 
Bigtoes, I went to Oz for my one week holiday. I agree with you! Sometimes, it makes me wonder why he wants to get married if he's such a mummy's boy. He should not have gotten married and just take care of his parents.
 
Bacon: For KS, it's a bit troublesome cos they only accept US-issued credit cards. You got to use a concierge service. And choose Borderlinx cos it's free. CWG charges a 5% fee.

Open the Borderlinx account here..

www.borderlinx.com
 
wingkei
Welcome back!

My hubby will always walk hand in hand with me, even when we go out with his family, we'll always walk together. I mean, how can your hubby blame you for such a request? It shouldn't even be a request in the first place.. I feel so unjust for you. He doesn't know how fortunate he is, you are already so patient with him.
 
Wingkei
My hb does tend to walk ahead of me, esp now that I'm super slow...and when I am handling my son. but I just remind him la..i think a bit tiring for him to walk slowly...cos I'm usually a fast walker and know how tiring it is to walk slowly if it doesnt come naturally.

hehe sometimes if I am really frustrated (esp when left alone to handle son) I will purposely walk even slower till i am out of sight...then he panics and comes back to look for us...lol...
 
wingkei
Ava's idea is great.. just disappear behind a wall or something.. he's sure to panic &amp; come looking for you when he turns back &amp; realizes you've disappeared!
 
wingkei (wingkei) - i guess ur hubby is one of those traditional MCP types...sorry to say that...what is the point of getting married if he loves his parents more than his wife &amp; seems to care more for their welfare? He actually reminds me of the hubby to Zoe Tay's character in the 9pm chinese show now on at Channel 8.

I guess u just have to be strong &amp; have ur life revolve around other things (baby, friends, your own family) &amp; not let his attitude eat into u. *hugs*
 
Oh yes, and he's already planning for a trip with his family for next year already! Then what about my family? Are they like non-existent? He has not seen my parents for a month already, nor eaten with them for a month, and yet totally didn't ask about them.

Then when we came back, he told me we are having dinner with his family, and of course I went along. He chose a nice restaurant because he said that I can't really stomach coffeeshop food now. Then I told him we will need to celebrate Father's Day with my father and he immediately said, we can go to eat at the coffeeshop. I told him but I can't stomach coffeeshop food now, and he was like, it's not you who are eating, but your parents. Isn't that like double standard? Just because it's his family, we have to go somewhere nice to eat, but it's my family, we have to eat at just any coffeeshop. And he totally has no qualms about paying for the expensive dinner but whenever it comes to my family dinner, he will grumble a lot about paying even when I offer to pay.
 
Mei, I would love to do that too. I tried it a few times before and only got scolded by him. Maybe I should let him watch that show to SHOW HIM how he is like. He blames me that his mother treats me very nice but I am not treating her nice enough. That I am still treating her or his family like strangers. But I really wonder how is wanting him to walk or sit with me making his family out to be like strangers, you get what I mean? I thought it should be normal for a hubby to want to walk or sit with his wife. He said I should feel proud that his parents want him to sit infront in a car/cab but sometimes, his mom has to ask his father to go sit infront just so that he will sit behind with me, if not, he will ALWAYS go sit infront.

If it's just once or twice that these things happen, I don't mind, but it's every time, even when we go out with his friends.
 
wingkei,
next time, just take the front seat and refuse to budge! :D

i used to offer front seat to my FIL too..out of respect..he always refuse..so after a while, it becomes a standard for the PIL to take backseat. As for walking with hubby, we would walk hand in hand..but when my hubby is carrying or walking our pet, he would walk in front cos i cant keep up with their pace. sometimes my hubby would also "forget" to hold my hand, i usually fuss over it and tell him if he dont hold me now...and he is old and fragile, dont expect me to hold him!! hee..
 
father's day,
shouldnt be saying this but cant help it..
just go without yr hubby lah..tell him he is not "needed" in all future family gatherings with your family. Same for his family..u will attend when u r avail. *evil grin*
 
bacon&amp;egg, I shouyld probably do that. Or else, if the car is too full, I would just say I will find my own transport. ;p

My hubby usually doens't hold my hand, I would have to initiate it. I don't know why I got so frustrated this time. I think it's because of the way he IS blaming me. I was so happy when he volunteered to sit behind with me. It was the first time he ever did that! Then after that, he had to spoil everything.
 
cloud (lovelycloud) : I got Tollyjoy cos it's cheap and when I got Bumwear from the Motherhood fair, they were using Tollyjoy too, and it's indeed quite soft like bacon&amp;egg said.

wingkei: welcome back! hmmn, sometimes my hubby walks faster than me, leaving me behind too. There're also times when I'll walk ahead of him too! haha ... it doesn't bother me actually. When we were on holiday, with church friends and all, I was walking alone most of the time, cos he had to be the last guy, to ensure no one in the group is left behind. When we travelled with his parents, during our proposal trip, he was also looking out for places where his parents can eat. I think they're just being filial, he probably thinks you're capable of taking care of yourself while his parents are not, perhaps not used to the food, the culture, language, as easily as we youngster can adapt to. Dun take it to heart. Just learn to "kan kai yi dian" lor ... and I think you'll be happier. Just focus your attention on your little one for now. =) Start counting his kicks and all, be surprised by his movements etc, to keep yourself occuppied.
 
SarahMay: I only got the Derma-cleansing gel for both hair and body. It's $26.90 before 20% discount. I'm just trying it for the NB, after that I'll switch to another cheaper brand
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Lanolin: Really? U r in HR? Good!! I think it's my boss who got HR to start checking on all those with high MC rates...

And btw, u dun need TIME to practise kegel lah...u can do in on the way to work, at your desk, when u r watching tv at home...that's what the TMC antenatal instructress told us
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lovebug: I also want to ask the same question as xuanting. You teach home econs and dunno how to cook?!!! That's amazing...What did u study in uni? I'm very curious what courses MOE home econs teachers took in uni.

Mei: You really can sew, man...SOooooo adorable! good job!

bacon&amp;eggs: u too? The minute I got married, I'm on my own, spending only my &amp; my DH's money.

wingkei: u r back from your vacation!!! How's everything going? Still bickering? Chill out, girl. Go buy your stuffs before the GSS ends...

Are your in laws the filthy rich kind that your mommy's boy DH must suck up to until they ...(no offence)? Some husbands act like yours because they want to remain in their rich parents' good books. They'll tend to neglect u (esp if u r unemployed/earn little and dun exactly come from a well-to-do background that he can bank on, i.e. must 'burden' him for the rest of his life) and place higher imptance on their own folks. Debunk my theory if i'm wrong
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hi morning ladies,
been a long long time since i posted. has been reading silently. saw so many sprees and so tempted to buy,but will be getting hands down from frens for my baby gal, so must control.
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re : carseat
those having no. 2 , how u plan to place 2 carseats in yr car? is it safe to place e older kid in front? also my boy will be turning 3 when meimei arrives, can he start to use booster seat already?
 
oh, any1 shop for maternity pads and disposable undies for after birth already? why to get better deals? also pigeon breast pads too.
 
flos,
since O level, i have been paying for my own stuff. I would work part-time weekends to pay for my education. My hubby is diff, his folks paid everything for him even his vacations..so after we know each other, i had to re-educate him that we should spend our own money and leave the parent's monies for themselves.
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milkmilk
booster seat: depends on his weight. I'd think better to get booster with 5-pt harness...Nania (at Robinsons) has one that's not too ex..we think we shld have gotten that for our son instead of a normal booster actually...
 
avalyn, i didn't know booster has 5pt harness, u've more info on this nania brand seat n how much does it cost? we've 1 normal booster which came free when we bought the 1st carseat, but after trying on, like not very secure, cos e seat will move when the car breaks.
 
wingkei, somehow i agreed to with bacon&amp;egg.. there is once, my husband was so angry with my family and requested to opt out all my family events.. and i returned the same to him.. i opt out all his family events.. but soon he gave up, cos his family will asked him when am i, etc etc.. and when he told me, i just tell him.. the same questions i got from my family.. what to do... heee... and when my mil asked me, i just tell her in front of my husband, is he dont like to attend mine family's event so we aggreed no family outing for us.

as for places to go/eat.. usually is my husband decided and paid for his family and i decided and paid for my family... so we dont have any issue here..
 
milkmilk,

The best deal for pigeon breastpad so far that I know of is to buy from Bangkok! ~S$8-9 for a box of 60pcs.

The booster seat with harness generally takes a child from 15kg onwards. It's not the age but the weight/height that matters. Definitely NOT advisable to put carseat in front seat. We will be having 2 car seats and hence, looking around for a another car.

BB Bath / Shampoo:
Whatever brand u buy for NB, my advice is to get non-rinse ones which can be used for on both hair/body. I am getting lactacyd.

Raspberry Tea:
U can get it from Moms in Mind. It's the same showroom as Little Dreamers. http://www.momsinmind.com.sg/herbalteas.html
 
Lok: But the Pigeon breastpads (60pc pk) are selling at $8.90 in SG right now too.

Why non-rinse? I dun dare to let NB use non-rinse on hair and body. Gives me a feeling it's not cleaned. It's nice to immerse bb in a tub of hot water, isn't it? My DH and I love hot baths and hot springs!!! I hope my bb will grow up to love water like us as well...cos I want to take him to Bali to swim...

Car seat: Nania...the lion, the witch and the wardrobe can all sit?!! LOL

bacon&amp;eggs: u r very indept indeed
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Mine is opp. Parents paid so much for my everything before marriage until I got sooooo paisey...after meeting my DH, we decided we should be reliant on ourselves. Heheh!
 
flos,

The pigeon breastpads in SG are sold in 36+6 packs. Have not seen the 60pcs pack in SG. Where did u see them?

NBs are not that dirty anyway! Non-rinse are easy to manage. TMC recommends that too. When they get a bit older, u can switch to other brands.
 
shazz, thank you.
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Yeah, I know he's being filial, but sometimes, I find he is over doing it. To the extent that I feel I am an extra. And he is only concerned about his parents' needs, I feel like an afterthought. Espcially now when I need to watch my diet.
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bacon&amp;egg and von, thanks for the suggestion. I would really love to try it, but I don't know how. I've already told him before that I know he doesn't like to go to my family gatherings so I don't mind if I go alone, but no, he doesn't allow it. I am NOT allowed to go to my family gatherings alone.

I would like to decide and pay for my family too, but he also doesn't allow it. He will decide the place, cannot be somewhere too expensive. His theory is that even though I pay, I'm still depriving our joint resources. But yet, I see him always going to restaurants with his family and never saying anything. Then when I make any comment, he will say that I am being calculative.
 
Flos, yes, I'm back! Yes, and still bickering. I know, I want to go buy my stuff before GSS ends. My hubby can't make it so I told him no problem, I will find someone to go with me and he says no, I have to go alone. Girls always like company when they go shopping, isn't that normal? He says I am not independent enough, so must go shopping alone!

No, they are not. But I find my hubby overly dependent on them. For instance, even buying groceries, like when we are at the supermarket, when I wanted to buy some veg, he will say, no need, we can get from his mom. I was like, why do we even need to get veg from his mom? Can't we just buy ourselves? Oh yeah, he wanted his mom to do confinement for me because his mom told him she will pay for all the herbs. It's not like we are really that desperate that we need his mom to pay for the herbs, etc. If given a choice, I would rather pay for everything myself.
 


ava: how come Nania is only $150. What a steal!!! Robs selling them?

lok: i thot the one i bot is a 60pc pk one...i must go back and check.
 

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