(2008/06) June 2008
- Thread starter avoros
- Start date
Ellysia,
not necessary for u to follow the recommendation strictly. U shld take your child's cues. For me I give alot cos after seeing his pee & poo & milk feed ok then I just continue liao. Sometimes he can drink up to 200ml too if it's a hot day but I try & give only 20-30ml each time, cannot give 1 shot cos wait too bloated (this applies to adults too) then cannot drink milk/eat cereal.
Ritzy,
like wat i mentioned a child has short memory until 2yrs but if u want to change any habits the earlier the better cos it'll take us lesser time too. ^_^
Shimin, if u have pacifier then u try to give it to him when he cries at nite & c how's the reaction cos mayb he just wants to suck for comfort. But if the pacifier drops out when he sleeps then please dun put it back. BTW, have u checked is it tummy got wind? If got wind also will cry, u observe & c whether he bends his legs towards his tummy when cry.
not necessary for u to follow the recommendation strictly. U shld take your child's cues. For me I give alot cos after seeing his pee & poo & milk feed ok then I just continue liao. Sometimes he can drink up to 200ml too if it's a hot day but I try & give only 20-30ml each time, cannot give 1 shot cos wait too bloated (this applies to adults too) then cannot drink milk/eat cereal.
Ritzy,
like wat i mentioned a child has short memory until 2yrs but if u want to change any habits the earlier the better cos it'll take us lesser time too. ^_^
Shimin, if u have pacifier then u try to give it to him when he cries at nite & c how's the reaction cos mayb he just wants to suck for comfort. But if the pacifier drops out when he sleeps then please dun put it back. BTW, have u checked is it tummy got wind? If got wind also will cry, u observe & c whether he bends his legs towards his tummy when cry.
3am thingy: Athan will normally wake up around that time too & everytime i will latch him but last nite I realised mayb he's hot so after i change position for him & pat him for <1min & he went back to bed until 6am this morning for his 1st feed. He then went back to bed until 8am.
Veniz, Jan, Babycupid & Angel, Thanks for all your advise last nite. I'll dreamfeed him again tonite but this time maybe just 140ml & hopefully can last him until morning.
Veniz, Jan, Babycupid & Angel, Thanks for all your advise last nite. I'll dreamfeed him again tonite but this time maybe just 140ml & hopefully can last him until morning.
Thanks for your replies! I am trying to BF till she doesn't want it anymore like my DS (he bit me till I bleed).
Re: Pacifier
Yup, I agree. Its easier to wean off the paci then the thumb. When the time comes, just ask your kid to throw the paci into the dustbin and say goodbye to it.
Re: Night Feeds
My girl also wakes-up at nite to drink milk. So far, its 12 plus, 3 plus, 7 plus. I make sure that I keep nighttime care low-key (eg: dim lights, a soft voice and a rocking chair from Ikea)
Cactus - Yup, like yourself, I don't have a schedule for Gianna either. When she needs to feed, I will BF. When she needs to sleep, she will signal (rub eyes) and gets cranky. Just have to ensure that she has her lunch and dinner.
BabyCupid - Some babies are like that...just like my #1. When i complained to the consultant at ParentCraft (1st time mom mah), she said no worries coz your kid will know when to sleep when he needs it.
Thanks for sharing your precious pixs! So cute!!!
Re: Pacifier
Yup, I agree. Its easier to wean off the paci then the thumb. When the time comes, just ask your kid to throw the paci into the dustbin and say goodbye to it.
Re: Night Feeds
My girl also wakes-up at nite to drink milk. So far, its 12 plus, 3 plus, 7 plus. I make sure that I keep nighttime care low-key (eg: dim lights, a soft voice and a rocking chair from Ikea)
Cactus - Yup, like yourself, I don't have a schedule for Gianna either. When she needs to feed, I will BF. When she needs to sleep, she will signal (rub eyes) and gets cranky. Just have to ensure that she has her lunch and dinner.
BabyCupid - Some babies are like that...just like my #1. When i complained to the consultant at ParentCraft (1st time mom mah), she said no worries coz your kid will know when to sleep when he needs it.
Thanks for sharing your precious pixs! So cute!!!
teragram
Active Member
Mag,
Are u using the cry-it-out method for Athan? I just saw this no-cry sleep something something book on amazon. Very tempted to get cos it promises getting the bbies to sleep without any crying! Sounds challenging! hehe.
Shimin,
Ur boy is waking up at 3am everyday? I know this qn has been asked already but did u over-stimulate him before he sleeps at night? How long does it take for him to fall asleep again?
Are u using the cry-it-out method for Athan? I just saw this no-cry sleep something something book on amazon. Very tempted to get cos it promises getting the bbies to sleep without any crying! Sounds challenging! hehe.
Shimin,
Ur boy is waking up at 3am everyday? I know this qn has been asked already but did u over-stimulate him before he sleeps at night? How long does it take for him to fall asleep again?
teragram
Active Member
JP,
Oh-oh, my boy's not taking paci now and sucking his fingers instead. Is it too late to intro paci now? Is it a must?
Yah, i know some of my colls swear by the cry-it-out method but i dun think i have the heart to do it.
Oh plus now i know it doesn't work for all babies.
Oh-oh, my boy's not taking paci now and sucking his fingers instead. Is it too late to intro paci now? Is it a must?
Yah, i know some of my colls swear by the cry-it-out method but i dun think i have the heart to do it.
Oh plus now i know it doesn't work for all babies.
This is something I read from BabyCenter about the CIO Method:
Step 1
Put your baby in his crib when he's sleepy but still awake.
Step 2
Say goodnight to your child and leave the room. If he cries when you leave, let him cry for a predetermined amount of time. (See "How long should I leave my child alone?" below.)
Step 3
Go back into the room for no more than a minute or two to pat and reassure your baby. Leave the light off and keep your voice quiet and soothing. Don't pick him up. Leave again while he's still awake, even if he's crying.
Step 4
Stay out of the room for a little bit longer than the first time and follow the same routine, staying out of the room for gradually longer intervals, each time returning for only a minute or two to pat and reassure him, and leaving while he's still awake.
Step 5
Follow this routine until your child falls asleep when you're out of the room.
Step 6
If your child wakes up again later, follow the same routine, beginning with the minimum waiting time for that night and gradually increasing the intervals between visits until you reach the maximum for that night.
Step 7
Increase the amount of time between visits to the nursery each night. In most cases, according to Ferber, your baby will be going to sleep on his own by the third or fourth night — a week at the most. If your child is very resistant after several nights of trying, wait a few weeks and then try again.
How long should I leave my child alone?
In his book, Ferber suggests these intervals:
* First night: Leave for three minutes the first time, five minutes the second time, and ten minutes for the third and all subsequent waiting periods.
* Second night: Leave for five minutes, then ten minutes, then 12 minutes.
* Make the intervals longer on each subsequent night.
Keep in mind that there's nothing magical about these waiting periods. You can choose any length of time you feel comfortable with.
Step 1
Put your baby in his crib when he's sleepy but still awake.
Step 2
Say goodnight to your child and leave the room. If he cries when you leave, let him cry for a predetermined amount of time. (See "How long should I leave my child alone?" below.)
Step 3
Go back into the room for no more than a minute or two to pat and reassure your baby. Leave the light off and keep your voice quiet and soothing. Don't pick him up. Leave again while he's still awake, even if he's crying.
Step 4
Stay out of the room for a little bit longer than the first time and follow the same routine, staying out of the room for gradually longer intervals, each time returning for only a minute or two to pat and reassure him, and leaving while he's still awake.
Step 5
Follow this routine until your child falls asleep when you're out of the room.
Step 6
If your child wakes up again later, follow the same routine, beginning with the minimum waiting time for that night and gradually increasing the intervals between visits until you reach the maximum for that night.
Step 7
Increase the amount of time between visits to the nursery each night. In most cases, according to Ferber, your baby will be going to sleep on his own by the third or fourth night — a week at the most. If your child is very resistant after several nights of trying, wait a few weeks and then try again.
How long should I leave my child alone?
In his book, Ferber suggests these intervals:
* First night: Leave for three minutes the first time, five minutes the second time, and ten minutes for the third and all subsequent waiting periods.
* Second night: Leave for five minutes, then ten minutes, then 12 minutes.
* Make the intervals longer on each subsequent night.
Keep in mind that there's nothing magical about these waiting periods. You can choose any length of time you feel comfortable with.
Bleh & Fennie,
how i trained Athan to play on his own when he was 5mths is i'll put him in bumbo seat & pass him his toy then i'll sit abt 1 foot away fr him & just watch. STRICTLY NO TOUCH. I din play wif him but I just told him to play his toy on his own, mummy will b here to watch then I'll keep quiet. Over time i'll move further & further away until he can play wifout me in his line of vision but I make sure to check on him every 5mins just to assure him that i'm still around. I did the same thing when I started his Jumperoo 3wks ago too, he can stay there alone in the living room for min 30mins to 45mins just playing while i'm in the room/kitchen/bathroom. During the Xmas party, cos there were not many ppl so I left Athan on the playmat to play alone while I busy walking here & there & chitchatting wif Felicia & Sandra for >30mins. Pls take note that if surrounding too many ppl, then bb won't want to play alone cos too noisy.
Tera,
Ya i'm using cryout method. Maybe u try crying out method first & if cannot work then u can consider get that book. Hehe... Actually I discussed this cryout method wif my child psych lecturer & she said it's normal fr bb to cry badly initially but after that, everything will b normal already.
how i trained Athan to play on his own when he was 5mths is i'll put him in bumbo seat & pass him his toy then i'll sit abt 1 foot away fr him & just watch. STRICTLY NO TOUCH. I din play wif him but I just told him to play his toy on his own, mummy will b here to watch then I'll keep quiet. Over time i'll move further & further away until he can play wifout me in his line of vision but I make sure to check on him every 5mins just to assure him that i'm still around. I did the same thing when I started his Jumperoo 3wks ago too, he can stay there alone in the living room for min 30mins to 45mins just playing while i'm in the room/kitchen/bathroom. During the Xmas party, cos there were not many ppl so I left Athan on the playmat to play alone while I busy walking here & there & chitchatting wif Felicia & Sandra for >30mins. Pls take note that if surrounding too many ppl, then bb won't want to play alone cos too noisy.
Tera,
Ya i'm using cryout method. Maybe u try crying out method first & if cannot work then u can consider get that book. Hehe... Actually I discussed this cryout method wif my child psych lecturer & she said it's normal fr bb to cry badly initially but after that, everything will b normal already.
Cactus - Its good to be back!
Ya, also make sure to keep the nite time low key. This will ease the baby towards dreamland. I remember my DH kept playing wz #1 coz he comes back late most of the time. Aiyoh, headache...#1 just cannot go to sleep. As for #2, its low-key nites all the way.
Tera - This is just my opinion coz my #1 takes the paci and my cousin's kid sucks his thumb. #1 is 2 yrs old now and he will only ask for his paci when he wants to sleep. But for my cousin's kid, he will suck his thumb 24/7. Some of the mommies from my #1 group also use the "big boy now, throw away paci act" and it worked.
soo - I really depends on the kid. I have 2, so I can compare. My #1 can't even sleep on the bed/cot/pram/whatever. He needs to be carried and rocked. But that stopped when he turned 8 months old. As for my #2, much easier. Once I rock her to sleep coz she loves to sing with me I can just place her on her bed and no complains.
Tera - This is just my opinion coz my #1 takes the paci and my cousin's kid sucks his thumb. #1 is 2 yrs old now and he will only ask for his paci when he wants to sleep. But for my cousin's kid, he will suck his thumb 24/7. Some of the mommies from my #1 group also use the "big boy now, throw away paci act" and it worked.
soo - I really depends on the kid. I have 2, so I can compare. My #1 can't even sleep on the bed/cot/pram/whatever. He needs to be carried and rocked. But that stopped when he turned 8 months old. As for my #2, much easier. Once I rock her to sleep coz she loves to sing with me I can just place her on her bed and no complains.
Hi JP, the Ferber method was mentioned by Baby Whisperer too & the concept came fr Psychology theorists.
Frankly we can condition/uncondition anybody if u use the right method consistently. If u ladies want to try to change any habits for your child, can try for 3 days to a week like wat I suggested to Angel last nite abt the yaolan.
Frankly we can condition/uncondition anybody if u use the right method consistently. If u ladies want to try to change any habits for your child, can try for 3 days to a week like wat I suggested to Angel last nite abt the yaolan.
My sincere apologies to all mummies if I'm boring anyone wif this conditioning method. Just thot of sharing my experience. Pai say pai say..
Tera, the beginning is always the hardest. I almost gave up when I saw the way Athan cried the 1st nite but thank God it improved. The best part was my mum was in the room wif me & she was tearing cos she cannot tahan c/hear Athan cry until so cham.
Tera, the beginning is always the hardest. I almost gave up when I saw the way Athan cried the 1st nite but thank God it improved. The best part was my mum was in the room wif me & she was tearing cos she cannot tahan c/hear Athan cry until so cham.
Mag - Serious? You want #2 so fast? We were thinking of waiting till our #1 turns 3-4 before we TTC for #2. Alamak, God had other plans. Like Cactus, wear rubber also kena. So, the age difference between my 2 kids is 23 months. Thankfully, my son loves his sister very very much. So, kisses and hugs and no pinches and punches. THANK YOU GOD!
Mag, are you currently breastfeeding? If you are breastfeeding, and if you want to try for #2 soon, here's a tip. if your supply drops a little, don't increase your pumping frequency. I was told that around the time we ovulate, our supply will naturally drop. If we allow it to drop, we WILL ovulate. but if we increase the pumping frequency or duration, we will not ovulate. I posted some info about estrogen/prolactin balances some time yesterday on this.
Cactus - Whoever suggested that *slap**slap* coz you are NOT a bad mother. It really depends on the baby. I was watching a documentary about Babies and its proven that even 1 day old infants have different characters (born with it, as they say) and that's why some babies are easier to handle compare to the rest.
Cactus - Hope you don't mind me saying this ~ please "pu" yourself coz my friend's mom told her (she was also PG with #2 when her #1 was only 7 mths old) that a woman's body needs at least 2 year to get back to her healthy self after birth. So, besides coming over to my friend's house to cook delicious food for her, my friend also went to the TCM to seek help to "pu" herself. Her 2nd PG was also smooth sailing.
JP, I seriously dun mind having No.2,3,4 or even 5 if God wants me to . My hubby also fine wif the idea if we can handle financially & got helpers.
Cactus,
ya I'm still breastfeeding but cos I'm a SAHM so dun pump, I just latch. I think I belong to the category of EHTC(Extremely Hard To Conceive) group cos i tried fr 21yrs old until 27 then conceived for No.1. I thot I might b preggie again cos no spotting for Dec & tested this morning but negative. U really fertile lor. Lucky u, hope u'll have a smooth pregnancy.
. My hubby also fine wif the idea if we can handle financially & got helpers. Cactus,
ya I'm still breastfeeding but cos I'm a SAHM so dun pump, I just latch. I think I belong to the category of EHTC(Extremely Hard To Conceive) group cos i tried fr 21yrs old until 27 then conceived for No.1. I thot I might b preggie again cos no spotting for Dec & tested this morning but negative. U really fertile lor. Lucky u, hope u'll have a smooth pregnancy.
mag: so athan woke up at 6am this morning for his morning feed ah? so u going to try the dream feed tonight again?
ellysia: at 1st i onli give ard 40ml of water but sheryl constipated leh n everyone said should drink more water so now i give 2x of 40ml = 80ml loh.. but she will struggle la.. but i distract her with toys then she can finish le..
ellysia: at 1st i onli give ard 40ml of water but sheryl constipated leh n everyone said should drink more water so now i give 2x of 40ml = 80ml loh.. but she will struggle la.. but i distract her with toys then she can finish le..
feliciarosey
Active Member
<font color="aa00aa">Mag,
I really impressed with your method. It really need lot of patience and determination.
Sometimes i'll just 'surrender' especially i'm tied down with lots of works to be done.
Only recently YuJie started to get naughty, keep wanting ppl to carry. If we put her in the walker, and some books, toys, teething etc on her walker, she'll only play for the most 10-15mins, then she'll start screaming for us to carry her. As long as we carry her, she'll keep quiet.
The most frustrated thing is she'll make noise if we carry her while sitting for 10mins only. Then we have to carry her and walk around the house.
So now, i'll leave her on the mattress and put some toys beside her and tell her 'mummy is going to do something 1st, so you must 'guai-guai' play urself'.
Then when she start screaming, i'll go to her and repeat the same words. So far the longest timing she's able to play herself is about 30mins.
Re: sleep routine
I'll let YuJie lied on the mattress with pillow stuck beside her (prevent her from flip as once she flip, she'll start to make noise as she din know how to turn back). Then i'll dim the light and tell her 'mummy have something to do, so u sleep urself'. And then i left the room with the door open a bit only. Then will come to the room to check on her later on. So far, it works well except when she's too tired due to lack of sleep in the day and start to get cranky.
From my experience, nvr nvr make eye contact with them when go to check on them, else they'll start to scream for your attention. </font>
I really impressed with your method. It really need lot of patience and determination.
Sometimes i'll just 'surrender' especially i'm tied down with lots of works to be done.
Only recently YuJie started to get naughty, keep wanting ppl to carry. If we put her in the walker, and some books, toys, teething etc on her walker, she'll only play for the most 10-15mins, then she'll start screaming for us to carry her. As long as we carry her, she'll keep quiet.
The most frustrated thing is she'll make noise if we carry her while sitting for 10mins only. Then we have to carry her and walk around the house.
So now, i'll leave her on the mattress and put some toys beside her and tell her 'mummy is going to do something 1st, so you must 'guai-guai' play urself'.
Then when she start screaming, i'll go to her and repeat the same words. So far the longest timing she's able to play herself is about 30mins.
Re: sleep routine
I'll let YuJie lied on the mattress with pillow stuck beside her (prevent her from flip as once she flip, she'll start to make noise as she din know how to turn back). Then i'll dim the light and tell her 'mummy have something to do, so u sleep urself'. And then i left the room with the door open a bit only. Then will come to the room to check on her later on. So far, it works well except when she's too tired due to lack of sleep in the day and start to get cranky.
From my experience, nvr nvr make eye contact with them when go to check on them, else they'll start to scream for your attention. </font>
There was just once, about 1 month ago, Matthew sucked his fingers to sleep.. he was sooo tired. just zonked out on mattress in well lit living room in the evening!
Then on 2 occassions, after we rock him to bed, he suddenly woke up (within 1 hr). It was dim. bedroom. we ignored her. and pretended to sleep.. He made alot of night, like talk to himself, but not cry. Then he kept quiet.. then sucked his fingers intensely. then after a while, no more sound.zzzz already.
But we've not been able to repeat these ocassions loh... not as good boy as little YuJie
Then on 2 occassions, after we rock him to bed, he suddenly woke up (within 1 hr). It was dim. bedroom. we ignored her. and pretended to sleep.. He made alot of night, like talk to himself, but not cry. Then he kept quiet.. then sucked his fingers intensely. then after a while, no more sound.zzzz already.
But we've not been able to repeat these ocassions loh... not as good boy as little YuJie
feliciarosey
Active Member
<font color="aa00aa">cactus,
I'm not sure if she can understand but i think she most probably was bored with my repeat and repeat sentences , 'lor soh' mummy, so she oso dont bother to scream liao. hehe....
But for the sleep routine, i have been trying to trained her when she's few mths old. Initial stage, still need to carry and do 'human swing' to get her to sleep, then slowly no more human swing, just pat pat on buttocks. So now upgraded it to 'sleep on her own'.
But as for the carry part, i'm still trying, coz it does not work all the times.</font>
I'm not sure if she can understand but i think she most probably was bored with my repeat and repeat sentences , 'lor soh' mummy, so she oso dont bother to scream liao. hehe....
But for the sleep routine, i have been trying to trained her when she's few mths old. Initial stage, still need to carry and do 'human swing' to get her to sleep, then slowly no more human swing, just pat pat on buttocks. So now upgraded it to 'sleep on her own'.
But as for the carry part, i'm still trying, coz it does not work all the times.</font>
Cactus,
actually I was snapping at my hubby very often too eversince I finished my confinement & had to take care of bb most of the time. I blew it last wk & had a showdown wif him cos I think he's frustrated too as he couldn't treat me wif proper respect anymore. I self reflected & found that i'm at fault too that our relationship turned out this way due to my overtiredness as I kept snapping at him. That's y i decided to change my boi's sleeping habits so that we both could have enuff rest & save our relationship. Nobody likes to b snapped at so b4 all the snapping takes a strain in your marriage, mayb u 1 2 try & c if u can do anything.
Pump: Hehe.. actually I lazy to pump lor altho I have 3 of them. I dun want to stress too much on conceiving liao, just going to leave it in the hands of God.
I'm just 1yr younger than u but I married very early (ROM 18, Custom 21). My hubby old man liao, our gap is 8 yrs. That's y b4 I got preg wif No.1, I told myself & hubby that if I dun get preg by the time I'm 30 then i will take precaution liao cos by then my hubby will b 38 so probably no more stamina to help me take care of bb. Hehe...
actually I was snapping at my hubby very often too eversince I finished my confinement & had to take care of bb most of the time. I blew it last wk & had a showdown wif him cos I think he's frustrated too as he couldn't treat me wif proper respect anymore. I self reflected & found that i'm at fault too that our relationship turned out this way due to my overtiredness as I kept snapping at him. That's y i decided to change my boi's sleeping habits so that we both could have enuff rest & save our relationship. Nobody likes to b snapped at so b4 all the snapping takes a strain in your marriage, mayb u 1 2 try & c if u can do anything.
Pump: Hehe.. actually I lazy to pump lor altho I have 3 of them. I dun want to stress too much on conceiving liao, just going to leave it in the hands of God.
I'm just 1yr younger than u but I married very early (ROM 18, Custom 21). My hubby old man liao, our gap is 8 yrs. That's y b4 I got preg wif No.1, I told myself & hubby that if I dun get preg by the time I'm 30 then i will take precaution liao cos by then my hubby will b 38 so probably no more stamina to help me take care of bb. Hehe...
Felicia, correct correct! That's the method that I used too & really cannot eye contact. I always like gui gui sui sui just to check on him during his playtime & sleeptime. Even when he wakes up fr nap, I dun go in straightaway to pick him up, I always drag abt 5mins(no cries) or 1min(cries) & greet him & ask him if he slept well/comfort him. When he smiles/calms down, i'll pick him up.
Bleh, this is wat i did for my son's bouncer problem
http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/cgi-bin/forumboard/show.cgi?tpc=578191&post=6647157#POST6647157
This is wat i suggested to Zuen for car seat problem
http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/cgi-bin/forumboard/show.cgi?tpc=578191&post=6647601#POST6647601
I decided to pat him on my chest 1st just to let him get used to having no movement during sleeptime & also to give him security b4 I upgrade him to patting only on mattress. Now he can fall asleep within 5mins of patting & 1min after he closed his eyes, i'll put him on the mattress but continue patting & chanting. Even tho he'll open his eyes & eh eh a bit, he managed to get back to sleep again & BINGO!!
http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/cgi-bin/forumboard/show.cgi?tpc=578191&post=6647157#POST6647157
This is wat i suggested to Zuen for car seat problem
http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/cgi-bin/forumboard/show.cgi?tpc=578191&post=6647601#POST6647601
I decided to pat him on my chest 1st just to let him get used to having no movement during sleeptime & also to give him security b4 I upgrade him to patting only on mattress. Now he can fall asleep within 5mins of patting & 1min after he closed his eyes, i'll put him on the mattress but continue patting & chanting. Even tho he'll open his eyes & eh eh a bit, he managed to get back to sleep again & BINGO!!
