(2008/06) June 2008

Babyjo
I agree wif Cactus. Any reluctance/resistance, dun force them to stay. U will get bite back.

Also, Filipino maid n Indian workers like to use "relative death" as an excuse for themselves to fly back to their country. So if u hear this often, u knw they wnt to go back already.
 


<font color="ff0000">maids*

its alot on luck i can say no matter phil or indo maids.. for my family &amp; me myself.. we all got phil maids and so far ok oso..
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my first maid who is a first timer here finished her 2 yrs contract taking care of my ger from NB to 2 yrs old and now currently is a new one who has 4 yrs experience in Singapore before and oso doing well with me, i changed to choosing an experienced one this time round coz i have 2 kids already so a first timer might not be able to handle tat well i assumed..
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getting and bringing a maid earlier before we delivery oso can get her mentally prepared of wat is going to happen here and oso to monitor her oso and in case her attitude fails den u can ask for replacement without panicking if it affects u or not.. good working attitude is impt.. do work slow can always be improved as time goes along
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<font color="ff0000">cactus*

confirm can do online, get the link from the agency and all u have to do is get ur singpass ready den once u have passed, jus print out the cert and fax over to ur agent
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<font color="ff0000">babyjo*

no point keeping a maid once a problem like this arise, coz deep down inside, the trust is broken and both of u dun feel the same like before already and moreover the contract is 2 yrs.. u got to face her for a long long more period so get someone u are comfy with.. it wil be better
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Crystal
Guess wat, i got the Disposable Underpad at 10 for $6, size 75cm X 75cm. I get it from Rehab Mart and the website is www.rehabmart.com.sg where u can see where the outlet is. I went to the Balestier one.

Also those who want to get any Blood Pressure Omron, its selling at $95 there. Its a place where lots of medical equipments can be found for the older generation.
 
Regarding the online course, does anyone know if the course runs often? and the procedure?

Is it choose maid already, then take exam, then maid comes over? or must take exam first, then choose maid, then maid comes over?

Does the exam results have an expiry date? For example, I study for it now, do the online course now, but get the maid next year?
 
This is the 2nd time liao. The first time when we notice that something bad abt her character, we really send her back to agency for them to tok to her. Then she told the agency that she in unhapi with my elder daughter bcos she always shout at her. Beside this, she is also unhapi that we keep her passport and work permit, bcos her sister told her that it shld be kept by her instead.

Then the agency told her no matter hw naughty the child is, she shouldn't show her temper to the children and stare at them angrily ( i caught my maid did this to my gal a few times, then my girl also complaint to me). I did tok to my maid, if the child is naughty must tell me. Then the agency told her children can't ctrl their temper and they dun understand things, so as an adult she shld gv in instead.

Then regarding the passport n work permit, the agency told her is compulsory that ive to keep it. Then the agency told her this will be her last chance, if nt we will send her back to them again.

Now she is givng me this problem, yet my hb n I still wann give her the last chance. I dunno whether will she learn.....my heart tell me i shld change since i really dun like her now
 
<font color="ff0000">its not a course, its jus an online test so its MCQ.. for me is chose maid already den agent gives me link den i take test lor.. u can take the test before u choose a maid oso can if u are certain u are getting a maid soon so will not waste the test fees
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and nope i doubt have expiry coz i took the test when i had my maid 2 yrs ago and when i hired a new maid late last yr, i did not have to re-do any test again
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<font color="ff0000">babyjo*

in regards to passport &amp; work permit, in actual MOM ruling, passport is the property of Phillipines so we cannot keep it &amp; work permit is like an ic to them so they have to keep it with them at all times.. BUT wat my agent taught me is that passport, jus tel her we SAFEKEEP for her.. and for work permit.. we keep the orignal oso for SAFEKEEP but make photocopy &amp; laminate it nicely for her to keep one copy lor.. tat is wat i did
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coz like if they need to remit money thru Western Union or watever remittance co.. some of them request to see their work permit for identification...</font>
 
cactus / felicia,
my MIL also sa-ma sa-ma as yurs lar. everything also say can cope. tat's y i ve so much pain in settling my confinement issues which until today, has not been settled yet. reai will be one of those cases of "boat come to the pier, then find a way" type liao.
 
morraine,
thks. u veri lucky got gd maids. i stil cant decide on filipino/indo maid.

crystal,
hb not sign-on. he goes japan is coy send. then co-incid wif reservist after he's back. so its nearly 1mth away fm hm liao. haiz.. i choose not to go back hm cos mum wil nag alot, then choose mil not to come cos no freedom. i already watch alot of rented TVB serial nw liao. tink by then not enough new dramas for me to chase. hahaha.

babyjo,
aiyo, heard liao me aso scare. i aso wun noe how to deal wif troublemakers. if too gd to them, they climb over u, if strict to them, scare they vent anger on bb/steal things/complain. veri difficult ah.
 
Im in the midst to decide whether to send her back.....bcos human are like this. later get the worse one how?

But i really dun like her. My hb and MIL wanna keep her bcos her work is gd.....but im opposite as i know attitude and character cannot change over time
 
Babyjo,
If the maid gives you prob within 3 months, I suggest you bring her back to the agency. I do not know what is your agency's T&amp;C. Do they give you replacement. Dont wait for another few months, then you are due soon and are in the mercy of the maid.

I think salary for indo and filipino are only a difference of $20. Without day off is $330 for indo and $350 for filipino. Both have their good and bad points. Indo -less communicative, can vomit blood sometimes when talking to them as they will say 'yes' when they dont understand. Food is another problem, as they cant eat pork. Filipinos - good thing they understand abit of english, but not necessarily good command. They are more naughty, will talk back. My current filipino, quite talkative, and will show face when scolded. Took advantage of my in law's kindness and ask them to buy phone cards for her without telling me as I will deduct from her salary. Will tell me sob story about her kid back home to ask for hp. Worst is quarrel with my BIL then make up story abt him. Going to send her back once I chose a new maid.

mrswrx,
best if u can make out a schedule as to what they need to do and communicate to them. No hp, but they do have their way to get hold of one. I know my previous indo maid got a hp from her friends before they went home.

feifei,
My glucose test result is 7.8
 
crystal/ cactus,

I think our concern now is how to let our MIL said the word 'surrender'. But certain things, we cannot let it to be last minutes action , else we'll in deep trouble.
Crystal, is better you firm up ur confinement issue asap as now oledi in late March. If i remember correctly, ur c-sec schedule is on mid May, rite? Then left only with 1.5mths leh.
 
feifei,
dunno leh, thats what it said on the paper. My test is the draw blood test, not prick test nor urine test.
Now, I do self prick test, twice a week, 7x a day.
 
tf,
i think i saw u wif someone in pants..hehe..no lah..i can remember how u look from the 1st class mah..so easy to recognise u during the fair lor..hehe..
 
TF,
wow, tat's a bargain u ve. ve went thru the website...thanks!
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if i pass by either e one at balestier or paya lebar, then i get from either one lar. for now, i make do wif my 10pcs pack 1st...


BabyJo,
IMHO on the maid's issue, i would send the maid back to agency now n get a replcement cos i c no point in keeping her on any longer. the trust b/w 2 parties are broken &amp; agency had warned her oreadi previously but this stills happened. in yur n yur hb's absence, u wld not know wat she would do to yur dd n yur nb (few mths down the road). best to change now than ve an axe over yur head.

RE: Maids
hb n i will oni hire one (at our expense cos SIL/BIL sure dun wan pay) end of tis yr or beginning of next yr shd i rtn to workforce. we intend for her to stay at MIL's place as bb will be there in the daytime. at the same time, the maid will help my MIL wif hsewk n looking after the 2 older nephews, etc. maybe once a wk, hb n me will bring back to our plc to do cleaning as we dun like having a stranger at our place - no privacy.
 
Maids,
Do go and choose your maid now if you are free. Documentations takes abt a month plus, and if the maid you chose fail the test, will be even longer.

Babyjo,
Man sometimes think that we woman are too fussy. They will always say chin chai lah,when we complain and want to change but, will complain to us when the maid iron his shirt badly, din wash car properly.
 
babyjo,

Agreed with oth mummies, that you shld change the maid immediately. A leopard will nvr change its spots!

Last time, my mom's neighbour got a maid looking after her 2 gers and 1 boy. The ger oledi in primary school and the boy is about 4-5 yrs old. As they found the maid got attitude prob, and send her bak to agency a few times and even threathen to send her bak to Indo, but she begged them. So they accept her again. But who knows, few mths later, her attitude problem became worst and had an argument with the neighbour. Later tat afternoon, her son was admitted to hospital as the maid scalded the son when prepare bathing water for him. According to maid it was an accident but who knows. And when the maid was send for investigation, the neighbour found some chicken bone wrapped nicely in cloth hidden in the maid room. Not sure was it some black magic or wat but it was oledi quite scary seeing all that.

I'm not trying to scare you but you nvr know what your maid will do when they are angry.
 
bizznow.. no lah, hubby is normally quite thrify so quite kind of him to offer.. he prob see me very upset with my figure now...


muffin, how come 7.8 need to take sugar level every day? my first reading was 4 plus, then 6 plus and finally ended at 7 plus also.. gynae said i pass the OGTT test.. hmm
 
Cactus,

But if you let ur MIL take care of the bb till 8mths, it might not be easy for ur parent to take care after that coz by then bb oledi started to recognise faces. So, the best to change caregiver is around 6mths or earlier.
 
HI ladies,

Today i am on leave le. To rest and relax and relieve work stress. Tinking to go back office will be pressurize by my boss again, sianz.

Mog,

Ok in this case i also ask her around 32 weeks, which is my next appt.

muffin,

How come yr results so low? Mine is 115 and gynae said is ok leh.

cactus,

It is like tat one. At some time we tink it be good tat our parents take care but sometimes we worry it will tire out our parents.

Just like my MIL now worry she cannot take care and want my parents to help out, but knowing my parents situation I will prefer MIL to take care reason being MIL has a better environment.

Anyway later i tink no use worrying now, will do when the situation come.. maybe if bb is guai and cute, MIL and my parents will both like him so much muhaha.

I suggest to hb once tat i considered to stay at home to take care of kids or do a part time job when kids grow up, if we are going to have no.2. hb dun tink our financial circumstances allow.. which is a fact too. Well, i guess see how again.
 
cactus,

BB start to recognize face around 6mths. I plan if need to switch people, maybe shd bring bb over to the other parent often close to switch over period.
 
Felicia, Ellysia:

Yes, I also read that bb's start to recognise faces around 6 months. but I think it's okay to wait till about 8 months cos bbs only start having preferences about 9 months. And I plan to bring bb back to my parents' place over the weekends from 2nd month onwards (as in stay at my parents' place over the weekend so that they learn to look after the baby too. Further, I will be working part time and I will be caring for the bb at night and most of the day (except between 1pm and 630pm when I'm at work or when I"m travelling to/back from work). So, I think it's still okay. It's not like I'm leaving bb in my MIL's full time care 24/7.
 
Ellysia,

if you are contemplating stay at home, or work part time, now is the time to do it. When the child starts P1, it is often too late... Just a thought for you.

I prob won't be working part time for long, esp if my parents can look after our bb well. I'm not the type to remain at home!
 
good afternoon...
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ellysia...
have a good break today...
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babyjo...
i agree wif the rest. if the situation wif her now (without baby) is already so bad, it wld be worse when the baby comes along. the worst kind of maids are those who can act smart and do not give their employer a due amt of respect.

btw... are u all starting to have trouble sleeping at nite? i'm in my 27th week already and now having probs cos i feel so heavy. i didnt sleep well last nite... cos no matter which side i lie on, my leg will feel achy and painful e.g. if i lie on my left, my right leg will feel achy.
 
soybean, I'm feeling okay at night, except that I tend to wake up 2 or 3 times to go to toilet. Also, I need to be careful how I get up from lying or sitting up position, cos my hips tend to hurt. I'm told it's a result of our loosened ligaments as our bodies prepare for delivery.
 
soyabean,

i have to wake up 2-3 times every night, even though i try not to drink water b4 i go to bed, its very tiring in the morning, I am now 28weeks
 
mrswrx,
my hb also not sign-on but from navy unit, so tat's y ict also kenna ve to sail. thanks goodness his current company dun need him to travel overseas so much, if not i know i sure die. which serial u at wif yur tvbi now? i on the "gentle crackdown II"...

BabyJo,
if character sucks, cannot be changed one...if work sucks, can still improve overtime. no one is perfect, definitely not maids but given the choice of having a problemtic maid vs lazy maid, i rather ve a lazy maid than compared to one wif attitude / character flaw. it is an issue of lesser of the 2 "evils". try to convi yur hb n ve both of u convincing yur MIL later. all the best...
 
<font color="ff0000">mrswrx*

pray more before u select the maid! *lol*

finally got hold of my pupsik sling! all thanks to TF!!!
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cactus,

I dun like to stay at home.. prefer to work. I just tot once bb gets to 18mths and can attend playgroup, it be ok bec we can fetch him to and fro to childcare centre. But once he got to Pri school and sec school, dun want him to go back to empty house so best if parents can take care until we knock off from work.

My mum has been full time housewife since i am born, so i dunno how working parents do it. Always see my colleagues taking leave to monitor their kids during exam period. Then everyday call back home to ensure they are doing their homework etc.

Anyway it is just thinking too far ahead.

soyabean,

Yes having problem sleeping, keep turn left and right to and fro cos if squash tummy too much, will feel pain and bb will kick also.

I am now 30 weeks.
 
Recent 1 week suddenly my appetite increase a lot. Become hungry v fast, i tink maybe cos left 10 more weeks for me, so now will become hungry v fast.

few days ago i ate dinner liao still feel hungry, i have to eat another meal. hb see liao also tink scary.

And the feel of my bb movements have change ored. Now i can feel him moving and shifting positions and pushing my tummy hard, also sensitive to music and voices.

Just measure my weight and at 65KG now, shd be around 8-9KG gain since pregnancy.
 
crystal,
i watchin few serials nw. 1- the seventh day (abit romance comedy), 2- D.I.E, gu ling jing tan(detective), 3- tai chi. heehee.. i usually rent dvd cos vcd needa change every ep. lazy n dun wana bend down too often.
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i finished gentle crackdown.
 
Ellysia,
Yes I am those who call my son almost everyday to make sure he does his homework, he is in P2 this year, and not automatic, so I am worried, he wont listen to my helper(maid) and think she doesnt know how to help him with his homework, sign..sometimes he doesnt even finish his hw by the time i get back to work, and I have to sit with him to do his hw.
You are already in your 30weeks and only put on 8-9kgs, I am in my 28weeks and already put on 8-9kgs, envy u
 
ellysia...
yeah... its as if heavy tummy not enuf... baby kicking and moving vigorously in the mid of nite isnt helping too... hey... 8-9kg at 30wks is a very good gain...
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ur diet is reali helping.

like u, i oso cannot foresee myself being a SAHM. =p but for me, this time round, i MIGHT decide to extend my leave beyond the 3 mths if i manage to do a good job in bfg.

cactus...
do u drink alot of water b4 bed? so far, i can still sleep till morning wifout having to go loo. but i think not for long... keke....
 
felicia,
wait for our MILs to say "surrender"? is like waiting for sun to raise from west in my opinion. they can be reai stubborn, or at least mine is.

i gave up on my confinement being firm up liao. the oni concrete thing is hb be taking a 1 week leave after i left hospital to stay at hm n help out, tat would bring me to day 12 of my confinement period where i be prepared to be left alone. MIL is very certain she can manage to come over in day time (with the 2 boys in tow) to clean, cook n bath bb &amp; rtn back home at nite daily from day 12 of my confinement period onwards. think one of her SIL (hb's auntie) did tell her tat sure she cant manage but like those "face-loving" elders, she dun wan pple to say she oni look after daughter's sons (the 2 boys) &amp; not look after son's new borne daughter lor. *shake head* then at one point in time, she declare to me confidently tat once she open mouth to ask, another one of her SIL will sure come n do confinement for us. guess wat now? 2 days ago then sheepishly told hb n me tat tat relative avoiding her calls since she spoke abt the confinement issue...i told her dun push oreadi but she wun listen. hb says to let his mother be lor...wat can i say? say anymore or think abt it longer, i sure drive myself to pre-natal depression, so i dun think abt it lor. prepared to DIY confinement wif hb's help.

soyabean,
nothing out of the ordinary for me other than normal leg cramps, n waking up 3 times or so nitely for loo visits...
 
ellysia and cactus...
hehe... both ur weight are lighter than mine!! :p i gained 6kg so far... for 27 weeks... and my weight now is 67kg!
 
soyabean,

how did you managed to only put on 6kg for 27weeks?, I am the heaviest, pre pregnancy 70.5kg, now already 79kg, die liao
 
soyabean, I don't drink alot of water before going to bed leh... I just have a small bowl of soup for dinner. I don't drink anything else after dinner. Dinner is about 7pm. Also, I sleep in aircon room, so I would assume I would lose some water that way too.
 
Fennie
Me too 28 weeks as of last Friday....not sleeping well...

As for maid, me praying hard b4 selecting the gd one and don't feel too convince abt the maid biodata
 
mrswrx,
the 7th day - is it the one that has kevin cheng? and the girl has cancer?? i watched 2 episodes when i was in HK and liked it a lot. But it looked like a sad show. Also, they were about to show Gu Ling Jin Tan (it looked like an interesting show as well). Was intending to watch those during my ML.
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Fennie,
I also quite heavy, close to 71kg now. If that makes u feel better, hehe.
 
crystal...
jus curious, u taking a fair bit of cold drinks? i was taking quite abit... then i realise i tend to get leg cramps more often at nite... so now i cut down the cold drinks i take...

well, if worse comes to worse, u can consider ordering those confinement tingkat... then u wldnt hv to worry abt having someone to come over and cook for u. other housework, ur husband may be able to do some after workhours. or get a part-time cleaner to come in a few times a week to clean up. i believe that there are ways to work it out.
 
Crystal, actually don' tneed to wait for our MILs to say surrender. All that needs to be done is for our hbs to tell their moms that they are doing a very lousy job at child caring! Then okay already. That is our backup plan.
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Honestly, that's going to be the truth lah.. cos my MIL is not the best caregiver. she's not very hygienic..and she is quite selfish - she would rather watch tv or sleep until very late than to keep an eye on my SIL's son. She leaves the maid to settle the toddler.. and I've seen the maid just leave the boy alone..
 


Danryan,

I am 28weeks as of yesterday(sunday), having hard time in the night, having to wake up so many times,so tired in the morning

earlier on I asked if you got anything for baby from your malaysia trip, nto sure if you replied, cos i wasnt ard during lunch just now, i thought of going there but afraid of the jam
 

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