(2006/01) Jan 2006 MTBs

Re: Weaning
Guess u have to be "heng xin" to do it. It took me abt 1 month to get thru it with the help from my mum & hb. The longer u continue, the harder to wean. We tend to give in cos their cries will hit our soft spot. I only succeeded 2nd time round cos I was more determined to wean E off my breasts. Thats when I start to enjoy some nites of non-interupted sleep after 1 yr of bad sleep. Haahaa. Its when I started feeding him FM for the last feed, that he learnt to sleep thru the nites. So it kinda help him sleep better too. Good for him & good for me.
happy.gif
 


Re:Finances
looks that this is the topic of the day. My parents are also financially independent and does not take $$ from me. Thank God for that and I look up to them as an example. As for my ILs, my hb gives them a small token sum every month to cover food etc. The huge one will come from his sis who earns huge amount of $! Maybe not huge to some, but its really huge to me lah. $6-7k per month..

Anyway, hb and i has a joint-savings acct where we dump our bonuses into and use for big expenses like window grilles, meg's medical etc. Every mth, hb is responsible to put $ into joint-savings while i put $ into meg's acct.

But recently i decided i should open my own savings acct. JUST IN CASE hb should leave meg and me, I don't have $ problem. Not that i foresee that happening, but we never know such stuff. So i tot, beta protect myself first. :p
 
Re: Own savings acct

Actually it's advisable to have your own acct. Coz if your spouse should pass away before you, the joint acct will be frozen and it could take some time before they let you take any money from it again. So better have your own savings acct for unexpected situations like this. My hb told me to put some money into my own acct every month in case of such situations. Then at least I can be assured of having some money to tie over the period.

And your joint savings acct will go to the estate. If your hb had written in the will to distribute some of his assets to his parents or whoever, a portion of the money in the joint acct will be included if it's not specified in the will. If you cannot prove that you contribute any amt to the joint acct, they can distribute the entire sum. scary.
 
Mashy,
Oh i see, actually i was thinking more of if he runs away with another woman, not about passing away. :p Anyway, good to have own savings no matter wat.
 
mummies
thanks for your advise on the dental appt. I think I have an infection near the molar and gum is swollen. Gng to see dentist on Monday... hope no need to extract any tooth.

Re: Maid age...
Thanks for all the info.
Ytd... happen to know from a colleague her ILs is giving up their very good maid, and she is considering to take the Ils maide and make arrangement for her current maid (who is also quiet good, take care of her daughter from 2mths till now abt our bb age)...
I have express interest to take over if she is giving up since she comment the maid is good and can speak English.

We have talk to MIL abt getting maid, tho she still complain abt having bad maid but at the same time I seems to be able to hear her relief that someone will be in to help with house work.

SO now praying for good news from my colleague to confirm which I can take over.
 
savings accounts
My husband also say better not to have a joint account cuz like wad Mashy says, if anything should happen to either party, the account will be frozen. That's why we're keeping our accounts seperate. However, we have each other's account numbers and pins so we can draw money from each other's accounts.

What really upsets me was when we were so low in cash during that time, his father still asked for money from him and I had to borrow money from my dad as a result of the sudden shortfall. My parents are very well managed financially but I feel bad having to borrow from them. Besides, my FIL chose to "retire" early at 55 and "shake leg" at home and depend on my MIL and husband to support him. He has a sum of pension money but I don't know what happened to this money. He's always using the word "filial" to extort money from my husband to support his gambling habits. Many times, I have argued with my husband over this issue but unless his dad kicks, it'll never be resolved.

durianlover
I can fully understand what u mean but be prepared to fork out huge sums of money (possibly twice of what u're giving them now) to give ur ILs. Whether u agree to it or not, if Roy is the filial type, they'll still win the battle and it'll be more stressful on Roy if u're not helping to support the family financially. I've learnt that life is never fair. If u have lazy parents who would rather pass on financial burdens to their children than to work, you don't really have much choice, unless Roy is prepared to lose his parents by refusing to give them money. Don't make it become a "either me or your parents" issue. Just remember, if u need to work to help pay your ILs, you're helping Roy, not helping ur ILs.
 
Rachel
You have NOT spoiled our day at all pls dun say that!! Glad that you have poured out your concerns. I agreed totally with Mashy who has summed it up very well. I started off in the insurance line doing sales but never succeeded simply because I was not thick skin enough, eventhough I am a firm beliver in it. I would tell everyone i meet the importance of insurance but when it comes to asking them to sign on the dotted line, I was never persistent enough cos somehow I always felt ppl might think I am merely pushing for my own sales rather than for their benefit. After a while, I realised I am never a sales person, and am much happier being deskbound. In your case, you never try, you'll never know so just GO. Worst come to worst you are back at home being a FTSAHM, which is what you are right now right? So nothing much to lose. Alternatively, if you are just looking to supplement abit of income, can look for those part-time halfday admin jobs (this would be option should i decide to become SAHM one day)? You can also still do freelance graphic design here at SMH, for both babies as well as wedding photos? Hope all our feedback would ease your decision making little bit more... GOD BLESS!! =)
 
SY/Mashy,
Haha...Sometime i can't even strike 3 numbers across all 4 rows of my numbers. Even more unlucky.

CL,
Okie...i will check and transfer to you later.
 
toto
Haha same here. I bought before a few times but I only striked consolation prizes like 3 times before : once during my ROM, once during my wedding and once on my birthday.
 
Hi Rachael,

Nothing to be ashamed of in MLM. IT's just another career.

I was very tempted to go into one before i was preggy with Megan. But i find that i have to go for seminars every monday and friday, the rest of the night to meet potential clients if i want to establish myself. So i find myself spending more time away from my child. I foresee this to go on for at least two years before i can sit back see the income coming in and cutting the hours.

Maybe for you it is not too bad. You can start off with a few hours each day. But like the rest said, you may required hubby to look after dylan while you see clients in the evenings. So you need your hubby's support.

My ex company close down and i was out of job. One week later i discover i was pregnant! Was super worried cos we had just spend most of our savings on wedding, house etc. Thank God i got a pert time job at SIA to supplment the income. At least it pays for my insurance etc plus i was paying for my grandma;s maid.... i can't possibly ask my GM to pay herself so my savings depleted.

It is amazing how God provided thou. I was constantly worrrying but God never fails. Help came from relatives and friends by hands me down clothes, we discover we can claim medical thru hubby's company etc. It was also then that i realise we can rely on huuby's income and get by.

end up i was a SAHM for six months. I don't enjoy that kind of lifestyle because i still feel insecure in not saving as much as i can. Cos there are fixed payment on my side even if i don't work - insurance etc. Plus i don't enjoy being home all alone all the time as hubby works late.

And of course due to the financial constraint, i can't splurge anytime i want, cannot go for spa etc.... i start to pity myself and take it out on hubby. He is nice thou, he said he will give me money if i want to go but knowing how little we save every month, i reject.

Like ak, maybe i am not the very domesticated type. i enjoy working and having the income myself. Utimately, whatever your decision is, the most important thing is to be happy with your decision. Only that can you be happy and as a happy mum, Dylan will benefit be it you work or as a SAHM.
 
Tefal Kitchen set
I am interested to get one.....anyone knows whether sale still on? Mamachan....you going to buy? Can help me get one cos I will be busy doing exams this week....... but only if you're going to get one!
 
re: maid
mummies,
thanks for your advise and comforting words.

SSF, think it could be the post-natal blues kicking in. I was quite weepy for a while. Btw, my CL doesn't bathe, change nappy for bb. She only cooks. dunno if I'm too weak or just plain stupid not to ask her to help bathe and change nappy for the baby in the 1st place. Infact she did change nappy once and that was the only time I asked as the maid was out and i need to feed Keenan lunch. And even then, she did not even realise the baby's shirt was wet with urine!! Also, hb prefer me to handle Declan myself when it comes to bathing.

CL, yes, I'll def be there during playtime. But diff to draw a line between play and feeding/nappy-changing cos maid will play and sing to him while she bathes or changes his nappy. They are like best frens.

re: hands free bra
CL, how do you do it? Is the hole quite small so that it can hold the funnel? Which brand is it? Maybe I can go get one too.

re: bf
slinky, think Ariene is taking more than enough BM. Keenan takes 3 x 260ml = 780ml of FM per day. You are still the BM queen here la with your stash of frozen BM in their very own special freezer!!
 
denmy
Hee hee. U still remember the picture? Now not so much already la. I cleared away 1 deck of the freezer to store Ariene's frozen food cubes. My maid is still throwing away bottles of EBM every month when she run out of space to store the new milk to be frozen. Dunno why just cant finish all the milk. I asked her to defrost milk for cooking but still got so many bottles. I thought I pump just enough for Ariene to drink daily but the frozen supply just keeps building up. Good thing is when my supply is low, she'll defrost the EBM to feed Ariene otherwise, she seldom defrosts the frozen milk for her cuz there's enough freshly pumped ones in the fridge.

As for confinement lady, ur CL sounds like she's quite terrible leh. Aren't they supposed to be experts in taking care of babies and how can she let him soak in his urine stained shirt? What else is she doing to ease ur load other than cooking? Ask ur maid to "learn" how she cooks her confinement food and fire ur CL since she's not doing her job. They're not cheap right?
 
Mamapanda,
Here's a pic of the Tefal set:

805083.jpg


It has:
1) 1 x chicken
2) 4 x cakes
3) 1 x eggplant
4) 1 x tomato
5) 2 x cups
6) 2 x plates
7) 3 x ladles
8) 1 x pot
9) 4 x cereal boxes (mini)
 
RE: Saving Account and Joint Account

I have both saving account and joint account..I do agree with Tracy....
And think we must have our own saving account to protect ourself..
happy.gif

And for joint account....so far my hb contribute 90% more than me as I seldom contribute ....:p

RE: Financial burden

I give MIL allowance for taking care of Gracie....
My parent and parent in law are financially independent. My mum is housewife and my dad still got his own job, as my father in law just retired.
So far FIL never ask $$$ from us even MIL go holiday also from her own pocket or FIL pocket.
And they help me and hb a lot as utilities and house phone bill all by FIL. Even sometimes they will help me to buy 2 tin of milk powder for Gracie or vitamin and refuse to accept our money.
FIL always encourage us to do some investment and retired early with got not financial burden.

I'm not from those rich family althought a lot said Indonesia chinese is RICH,,,but that is not true at all. But at least can survival ....with not much worry..

I went thru a lot " KHU RE CI " when I was studied here...Ohhhhh...can your imagine being chase by your own relative and lock you outside the door without get your cash and your luggage
sad.gif
and beat by your own cousin and cannot complain to your dad and mum ........and a lot more...need to smile in front of your parent, And ditched by exboyfriend....that is me.

Now I hope my daughter will have a good education ....
 
i think the tefal kitchen offer is until yesterday for cardmembers....

denmy

sounds terrible. How come this CL doesn't do anything other than cooking? Like that you might as well cater.
 
denmy - dun get too stress out and must really relax lor. wow ur CL seems underwork lei. only cook no need to look after bb. so shiok! i think u shld ask her to relief you at times so you can have more time to rest and play with your kids. get ur hb to help out too if required.

mamapanda - quite a nice set. it has a standing kind of looking stove. silver in colour with all the pots and pans and hanging utensils. all in silver colour too. can make sound too. i showed hb yesterday tat my forum frd get that and he say 'wah look so high end!' haha...so gian to buy for caleb but i know he will give me the look. i think its a good buy coz the last set i bought for caleb which is not so sart is already 29.90 after offer. so this tefal kitchen set is definitely a steal!
 
Denmy
I just wear those nursing bra with the clip. I just unclip put the funnel adjust properly and clip it back leh. Have been doing this for both kids leh.

Tracy
Nice pics. Good buy leh. Help wenny and esther bought yesterday but too small for my Charmaine liao. I think the special buy $39 should be during preview sale. I can check it out tonight at Robinson and post though.
 
ai yoh,

Denmy..
so sorry i should have ask my CL to help you the last time..
she is really good leh.. why dun you jsut her your CL to wake up from her idea and start working..
 
Ha ha Denmy
Dun bother lah. Declan going to be 1 month liao CL going to get lost soon so just leave on happy note but dun have to give big big Ang Bao since she go thru motion
 
Denmy,
oh dear, the post-natal blues thingy? I was into it too and cried continuously for no reason for almost 2 days. Take a break, do something you enjoy for a day. That should help relieve some of the blues.

Isn't a CL supposed to cook, change diapers, feed baby, rock baby to sleep, wash baby's clothes by hand, wash mummy's clothes by hand if requested??
 
tefal set
Erm... is it a toy set for kids or is it a real kitchen set? It looks real to me.. Sorry if my question sounds stupid.. If its a toy set, I want it too! Been wanting to get Ariene a nice kitchen set
 
RE : Tefal Set
Wah....realy ipressive toys. Wanted to popby yesterday but stuck at Isetan. Juz waiting to enter carpark took us more than 30mins.

RE : Finances
We started joint account before we got married. Then we used the money to reno and wedding....Now we contribute a regular amt monthly and whe bonus time, I'll "tax" my hub accordingly. The good thing is my hub is not particular with how we spend our money and I'm the money faced 1. heehee...Usually I decide on wat can be charged to joint account. I wld try not to let him hv too much saving as who knows what kinda stuff he wld buy for his car.

My ILs are also financially not stable and my only BIL is not helping much either. When my FIL was still alive and the doc asked us if we wanted a pacemaker which cost 10k. I'm really stuck as we wld only be the one expected to fork out the money as my BIL has ZERO savings. For his funeral we paid most of the bills and my BIL din mention anything after that. I once casually explained to my MIL that we r tighter now with kid and we dont earn as much as she thinks. The problem is she thinks we earn alot and save alot and shld fork out as much as we can without considering any other factors. She's those type that spends everything and saves nothing!

My parents r total opposite. I was so embarrassed that my dad asked me if i needed financial help wif my FIL 100 day prayers as my MIL kept calling mom to complain. I told my hub that he shld tell his mom to stop calling my mom as it paints a very bad picture of his son.
 
Denmy,
Yah i thought its in their "job scope" to bathe and change diaper? They r to help with all baby related stuff right? Not very professional of her.
 
Denmy
Wow, your CL sounds terok man! Well, she'll be leaving soon, and as Chicken Little suggested, no need to give her such a big ang bao at the end of it all. Just pay what is due (though it might seem not worth it).

Tefal Kitchen Set
Haha, looks good, very tempted to get, haha, but my hb not for the idea. More toys = more mess. heeee, he's still pretty much happy with his boy, so long we play "soccer" with him can liaoz.
 
re: CL
ya correct. CL is supposed to do cooking, washing up, feed baby etc. but my smart alec hb told the agent we just need her to cook me confinement food and family dinner and make sure the food is nice. The fact is she can cook nice family meals and soups. And will help carry baby when bb cries and I am doing something else. So cannot say much lor. Anyway she leaving in 2 days liao...
 
re: tefal set
wow.. looks good! and it's so cheap!

denmy
sound that your confinement period is quite stressful. agree with Tracy that a confinement lady shall be handling bb portion which include bath, wash clothes, change nappy. just for cooking doesn't worth the price paid leh.
and since you have the confinement lady and maid to help up, probably it will be good if you take a short break from all these and even go downstair to have a stroll would be able to relieve some stress.
happy.gif


take care!
 
tefal kitchen set
I just called robinson's children department. They still have stock for the kitchen set. Its 39.90 and I reserved one set for myself already. If u're going down tonight, it should still be available.

chilles
I understand how u feel and what u mean. I also try to hint to my FIL that we're really quite tight so he can stop asking my husband for money to support his gambling habits but he'll throw in words like "not filial", "pay back time for bringing him up", etc. I really don't know how much longer I can withstand this abuse before I explode.

As for spending on cars, I think my husband and yours can be good friends. My husband's tyres costs >1k to change each time and he feels really lousy nowadays cuz he cant buy stuff for his car. he's been eyeing on things like a roll-bar, strut bar, etc (which can cost few hundred to thousand cuz they need to be imported from japan) since we got his car but I feel that he blames me for not being able to afford it because I was not bringing enough money home while I was working part-time.
 
RE: Tefal Set
Looks nice leh.. Jamie has got one already, else would buy this for her. The one that I have bought from Toy R Us has got sound and light too. Frying and Boiling sound from the stove. Kids now really have got nice and interesting toys compare to us.
 
mamapanda,
haha...yah...next time got gathering, I'll surely bring my hub to chat wif yours so that he wldnt be bored. Usually he will discuss with me if really gonna cost alot. But when he's in the mood, he wld buy!!! He changed the stereo, speakers, tyres, rim, tinted, "sprayed" some farni coats etc..he's also eyeing some stuff but yet to find the right tine to "strike"!

I dont usually hint my MIL but she always call my mom. Its a weekly affair that my mom has to hang the fone as she's really stressed. My FIL once got a sum of money and bought himself a rolex cos we din want him to spend the money for Xav's 1st month celebration. He din need one and i wasnt happy abt it. But its his money. What can i say right.
 
Chillies, Mamapanda
My hb oso one car accessories freak. Aiyo a stupid small colt he oso can put in all sort of rubbish. Already no boot space still need to put a woofer there. Ha ha but since Aden arrive, he got do a bit of control. But then again, his hands get itchy on Hp and other gadget. But it is his money so I just bochup.
 
CL, MamaPanda,
Hi 5! He also has a woofer and took us so much space in boot. He bought that behind my back. One day, i wanted to put things and opened...tata...!!

Oh yes...he also had this gadget that he holds the open key and the boot will open by itself. He also rewired the lock in such that once he stepped on brake, the car will lock by itself.
 
Ha ha Denmy

I have to check leh. I no more Bf liao mah. Otherwise you wear one I can show you how oso or we can meet somewhere before the Hi tea.
 
RE : Tefal Set
I called but was told its selling at $59.90. $39.90 was during the members sale only. Who was saying abt buying at $49???
 
Hi Denmy,

I can understand how you feel. I went thru the post natal depression when i had megan too. Cos i felt i don't have time for ashley anymore. Felt so sad. Yet when i spend time with ashley while hubby look after megan, i feel sad for megan cos she dun have my 100% attention, unlike when ashley was born. Either way i also feel sad. Ha Ha.

Give your self a break. The children will know that you love them very much and will always be there for them. We are mothers but we are also human being. NOt superwoman or wonder woman.
happy.gif
 
chillies, wenyl,
i bought this Tefal set at $49.90 from Metro. As you can see from date of pic, bought it quite recently in end April.
 


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