Single & attached/remarry?

[WonderNwonder]

be tan,
Thanks for your reply. Just to let you know, i have clarify with him and he mentioned he will never give me a damn even i am going to die because i am not the one whom is able to give or help him in his business, so i believe you have my answer and his reply.
I have been single for years, so i dont need to rush to search for a partner. I don't mind trying to have a friend (i told him to give us 3 months to know each other better, but he insisted to be together. Maybe guys do not want to spend a single minute to do the wooing, as they may feel it is a waste of time if not able to be together.) whom claim himself as a good guy. All these while, i will be facing work, sleep, kids and ipad and i don't bother to know to know anyone out there.
Bathing is a habit which is intact and in built. If i can't accept his habit, how can i accept to have him in my life? I dont expect my partner to change his character nor habits, as i believe being together has to accept what he/she has.
I hope he did not come and approach me because i know due to his "unique" habits, i can't tolerate nor i want to hurt him by telling him the truth. Sorry to say that.

 

[pixie ng]

I have been single for years, so i dont need to rush to search for a partner. I don't mind trying to have a friend (i told him to give us 3 months to know each other better, but he insisted to be together. Maybe guys do not want to spend a single minute to do the wooing, as they may feel it is a waste of time if not able to be together.) whom claim himself as a good guy. All these while, i will be facing work, sleep, kids and ipad and i don't bother to know to know anyone out there.
Bathing is a habit which is intact and in built. If i can't accept his habit, how can i accept to have him in my life? I dont expect my partner to change that.

i totally agree with you!
if you are happy living with your son, and your life is always been wonderful without a man, why need to "force" yourself accept a man that fails your criteria..
if really want to accept a man, he better worth being with...
if a man dont even bother to woo you, i think after together, he also wun put in much effort in the relationship.. then why want to add a burden in your life?

 

[WonderNwonder]

Pixie,
In fact, during the 2 weeks being together, i realised he loves to throw temper on and off and keeps on saying he is always right and i am always wrong. He will use his strength to hit me painfully which i never come across such guy in my life before. He also loves to ask me to pack food and he will come and collect the food from me which i dont understand why cant he get the food after work himself. (Just pass him the food and leave)
Dont you think such attitude is very bad? Making use of me to pay for his food? (He complainted KFC is very expensive.) Always no money in his wallet and said need to go atm every time he meets me. (Just for your info, we only eat in hawker centre and i pay for my kids and my food. He will asked me to pack for his mum and i pay.)
At that moment, i am confused because i have lost touch "in love" for quite some time, and this guy character and temper really ponder me. I really thought that nowadays guys are rough and demanding which in the past, they are not acting in this way. Maybe century changed the guy attitude, until i chatted with a guy. I explained to him all the things happened between us and he told me,"Women are meant to be pamper and love!"
From then onwards, i am sure the world did not change the guys, and is the guy i choose is weird. He did not know how to shower love to ladies, so i have choose the wrong one, so i decided to end happily.
All these while, i have been telling him to be friends and see how it goes, but he said that he wants to "book" me down, so no guys can be with me. I am not complaining, but just telling what i have been facing, or maybe i did not place him in my heart first, so he treats me in this way.

 

[pixie ng]

understand...

previously i was also single for a long period of time, and my buddies (2 male close friends) told me I'm too choosy hence no one dares to woo me. My expectation is too high, and female gets older means drop in "value".. i told them i dont care how people generalize women who is older than 30yrs old. i dont care how i was perceived as no value still hang myself high to sell.. if the guy cannot meet my expectation, no way i'm going to lower my expectation., i happy with my life, have a job, have a house, and happy with my life. if accept a guy who doesnt meet my expectation, he will just be a burden in my life. so why i want a burden with my life... anyway the conversation just ends in i'm a "typical singaporean woman"

when my partner chase after me, i slap him with my long list of expectation. if he can manage it then we talk about going further. if not, just remain as friends. lucky he is really an awesome guy and we end up very well together. he loves me, respects me and care for my everyday life...

just take your time to look around, date around, and most importantly open your heart to let people in..

 

[WonderNwonder]

Pixie,
Glad to hear we belongs to the same category and i am sure you are better than me by knowing what you want in life.
I am quite tired and scared of guys because when they are real or fake, i can't tell...that's the stupidness in me.
Anyway, i am happy that you get what you want.
All the best.

 

[tifflim]

understand...

previously i was also single for a long period of time, and my buddies (2 male close friends) told me I'm too choosy hence no one dares to woo me. My expectation is too high, and female gets older means drop in "value".. i told them i dont care how people generalize women who is older than 30yrs old. i dont care how i was perceived as no value still hang myself high to sell.. if the guy cannot meet my expectation, no way i'm going to lower my expectation., i happy with my life, have a job, have a house, and happy with my life. if accept a guy who doesnt meet my expectation, he will just be a burden in my life. so why i want a burden with my life... anyway the conversation just ends in i'm a "typical singaporean woman"

when my partner chase after me, i slap him with my long list of expectation. if he can manage it then we talk about going further. if not, just remain as friends. lucky he is really an awesome guy and we end up very well together. he loves me, respects me and care for my everyday life...

just take your time to look around, date around, and most importantly open your heart to let people in..

I totally agree with you. Everyone has their own imaginary partner in life. As a woman, we have to sell our self high so that people will look up to us. It doesn't really matter if we are getting older by age or not, as long as we are firm with our decisions, desires, needs and wants. Someday or other, I am sure like what you have found the right guy who bought you together with your expectations, the same way there are other guys that will buy us. I don't really believe that we should sell our self cheap or minimize our expectations as we are getting older as we still hold a beauty of woman with good brought up. As a woman here, I am proud to sell myself high and I am also hoping to get a right life partner who is able to support my decisions, accept the way I am, and meet my expectations, desires and dreams.

 

[tifflim]

Pixie,
Glad to hear we belongs to the same category and i am sure you are better than me by knowing what you want in life.
I am quite tired and scared of guys because when they are real or fake, i can't tell...that's the stupidness in me.
Anyway, i am happy that you get what you want.
All the best.

WonderNwonder - I understand that you went through many scenarios with man and I would feel pity that you had bad experiences with them. However, I will strongly say that Not all Man are from the drain, there are good man with good morals out there. "You have to fish till you get your big catch". If you want a fish but don't dare to fish, you will never be able to get a good catch. There will be many scenarios that you will come across in life. But to overcome it, you have to be strong and willing to stand strong to fight the battle. The more you are scared, the more panic you will be and the more silly mistakes you make whenever you try to catch hold of a fish that you catch. Guess why? The minute this guy say his lovey dovey stuffs, you will tend to trust him because you are panic, you don't know whether is he a good catch or not. So you tend to give him a chance. But trust me, when you are cool and relaxed, you will tend to be firm. The more firm you are, the more better you know which man you want to choose and I am really sure that you will get a good catch.
So basically, what I am trying to say is Don't Give Up! Keep trying! Don't be afraid! Just be firm and strong! Just be the way you are, and you will get yours soon! All the best....!!!

 

[tifflim]

be tan,
Thanks for your reply. Just to let you know, i have clarify with him and he mentioned he will never give me a damn even i am going to die because i am not the one whom is able to give or help him in his business, so i believe you have my answer and his reply.
I have been single for years, so i dont need to rush to search for a partner. I don't mind trying to have a friend (i told him to give us 3 months to know each other better, but he insisted to be together. Maybe guys do not want to spend a single minute to do the wooing, as they may feel it is a waste of time if not able to be together.) whom claim himself as a good guy. All these while, i will be facing work, sleep, kids and ipad and i don't bother to know to know anyone out there.
Bathing is a habit which is intact and in built. If i can't accept his habit, how can i accept to have him in my life? I dont expect my partner to change his character nor habits, as i believe being together has to accept what he/she has.
I hope he did not come and approach me because i know due to his "unique" habits, i can't tolerate nor i want to hurt him by telling him the truth. Sorry to say that.

True enough, bathing is a habit that intact and in built in us since young and bathing is something that we really need to do twice a day at least.
Habits that you cant accept in life, you can try changing but if he still doesn't heed to your sayings than I would rather say being together and unable to accept is just wasting your time and effort.

 

[pixie ng]

I totally agree with you. Everyone has their own imaginary partner in life. As a woman, we have to sell our self high so that people will look up to us. It doesn't really matter if we are getting older by age or not, as long as we are firm with our decisions, desires, needs and wants. Someday or other, I am sure like what you have found the right guy who bought you together with your expectations, the same way there are other guys that will buy us. I don't really believe that we should sell our self cheap or minimize our expectations as we are getting older as we still hold a beauty of woman with good brought up. As a woman here, I am proud to sell myself high and I am also hoping to get a right life partner who is able to support my decisions, accept the way I am, and meet my expectations, desires and dreams.

then again what you sell yourself = what you really are la...
like those people who is really materialistic and want to take short cut to a more privilege life is another story...

personally i dun sell myself high, i sell myself as what i am.. just that some people perceived as high because they did not achieve what i have achieve in my life

 

[tifflim]

Personally what I really feel that selling yourself the way you are is what that matters most. Not selling yourself high when you are don't fit into the category. I meant we have to have our own value and respect, that's what I eventually felt that selling ourself high.