A depressed breastfeeding mum here..............

[Ployrin]

hope someone can advice or help me out here..

my boy is 15 months now, has been fully breastfed since day one. both my and my hubbys' parents have passed away, we basically learn most of the childcare techniques via our neighbor or Google (yes google...)

i rarely get more than 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep since my baby is born. every 2 hours he will call for my breast. i thought things will get better when he grows up but now i am at my wits end.

i feel i am a bad mother/parent because even though i am a full time SAHM, i cant really take good care of my boy, every month he will have flu/cough/vomitting and visits to the PD is also taking a toll on our finances.

my husband works in a regional role and there are periods of time where he wont be at home, we have a helper at home though, but when it comes to sleeping time , my baby will only cling onto me.

we tried to let the baby Cry It Out, but nothing seemed to work

for the past 3 weeks , my boy hasnt eaten more than 3 mouths of porridge , he will just spit out whatever food we offer him, even his favourite snacks or fruits.

prior to that, he can finish one normal rice bowl of porridge within 20mins . the problem is i dont know who to go to, my relatives are all overseas or dont have children yet, my husband is an orphan so he doesnt have any relatives he knows.

i feel like jumping off the window and maybe my boy will be in better hands.

 

[Kumorin]

hope someone can advice or help me out here..

my boy is 15 months now, has been fully breastfed since day one. both my and my hubbys' parents have passed away, we basically learn most of the childcare techniques via our neighbor or Google (yes google...)

i rarely get more than 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep since my baby is born. every 2 hours he will call for my breast. i thought things will get better when he grows up but now i am at my wits end.

i feel i am a bad mother/parent because even though i am a full time SAHM, i cant really take good care of my boy, every month he will have flu/cough/vomitting and visits to the PD is also taking a toll on our finances.

my husband works in a regional role and there are periods of time where he wont be at home, we have a helper at home though, but when it comes to sleeping time , my baby will only cling onto me.

we tried to let the baby Cry It Out, but nothing seemed to work

for the past 3 weeks , my boy hasnt eaten more than 3 mouths of porridge , he will just spit out whatever food we offer him, even his favourite snacks or fruits.

prior to that, he can finish one normal rice bowl of porridge within 20mins . the problem is i dont know who to go to, my relatives are all overseas or dont have children yet, my husband is an orphan so he doesnt have any relatives he knows.

i feel like jumping off the window and maybe my boy will be in better hands.

Pls dun do anything rash or ur hubby, ur boy, ur loved ones will be heartbroken.

Although I dun have children yet and not in the position to give u parenting advice, there r many mummies here who wld be able to share their experience and give tips on handling children. The gals here r very supportive so u r not alone and I'm sure u can chat with them.

Take care gal

 

[april_stanley]

hope someone can advice or help me out here..

my boy is 15 months now, has been fully breastfed since day one. both my and my hubbys' parents have passed away, we basically learn most of the childcare techniques via our neighbor or Google (yes google...)

i rarely get more than 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep since my baby is born. every 2 hours he will call for my breast. i thought things will get better when he grows up but now i am at my wits end.

i feel i am a bad mother/parent because even though i am a full time SAHM, i cant really take good care of my boy, every month he will have flu/cough/vomitting and visits to the PD is also taking a toll on our finances.

my husband works in a regional role and there are periods of time where he wont be at home, we have a helper at home though, but when it comes to sleeping time , my baby will only cling onto me.

we tried to let the baby Cry It Out, but nothing seemed to work

for the past 3 weeks , my boy hasnt eaten more than 3 mouths of porridge , he will just spit out whatever food we offer him, even his favourite snacks or fruits.

prior to that, he can finish one normal rice bowl of porridge within 20mins . the problem is i dont know who to go to, my relatives are all overseas or dont have children yet, my husband is an orphan so he doesnt have any relatives he knows.

i feel like jumping off the window and maybe my boy will be in better hands.

Have you brought him see PD due to lost of appetite? Sometimes maybe growth sprout... ur baby addicted to ur nipple liao..

 

[timmerin]

hi, i m also a sahm wo support. i can identify w u because my hubby travels frequently n i regularly do solo parenting. basically not much me time/life. i breastfed till 2.5 years n my boy didnt sleep through the night till 2 years old. i didnt have maid till one month ago. i think u can bring to pd to check your baby out. he could be teething because i remember my boy went through something similar but i dont remember it being as long as 3 weeks so could be something else. i kept on breastfeeding my boy whenever he wanted... yeah i feel like my boobs are very used. it can be unbearable at times. but it will gradually lessen. u have endured for 15 months so its just a few more months before ur boy will gain more independence and u will be amazed at the changes in ur boy n u will be proud n happy that u made it this far.

 

[betc]

I think ur having depression. I had that kind of thinking when I had my elder girl. I wanted to throw her down. Luckily hb is very supportive. I'm also a SAHM for the past 9 yrs without any help. My younger girl is already 3 yrs old.

It will be good for u to go out with mommy friends with their children, chit-chat with them. Don't always stay at home. Or u can also just bring her child out, to the playground nearby. Just go for a walk. Have some fresh air. U will definitely feel better.

 

[sane]

U have already done your best by bf him fully for 15 months.

Maybe u want to intro him to bottle feeding, u can still pump out and asked your helper to feed him, then slowly intro him to fm.

Perhaps he is sick of porridge, why not u intro him to more varieties of food like spaghetti, noodle, rice to enhance his appetite?

Don't let bm take a toll on u and hinder u from enjoying motherhood.

 

[timmerin]

agree with betc, good to chit chat w mummy friend or hubby. for me i chit chat w mummies i meet outside or w my old friends who are mummies n with my hubby as well as w family members. they may not b able offer physical help but they can give u pretty sound advice n encouragement. my baby also frequently fall sick in the past but after they turned 3/4 years old n above it wont be so frequent like once a month... from what i observed w my boy

 

[deebee]

Hi Ployrin, I have 2 children aged 3 and 6. All I can advise you is, that children grow up very quickly. Don't feel too bothered by the issues you are facing now (unless they are life-threatening, of course). Speaking from my personal experience, it is just a phase and most of the problems will pass (ESP eating issues!). My older child used to be a fussy eater as well. Don't like to try new foods, only take chinese dishes with rice/porridge. Only when she turned 3 then started to accept things like noodles, spaghetti etc. I even bought a book on teaching children to eat well back then. If you would like to have it, send me your mailing add and I can send it to you for free

Oh yes, the frequent sickness is common. My child used to have prolonged coughs until she will throw up too. It's their weak immune system. It got better after turning 2.

Lastly, remember - it's ALL a phase and everything WILL get better! You can google and fret about it all you can, but i think you are better off spending the precious time enjoying your precious one. And you are not a bad mommy, you are the BEST mommy your baby can have

 

[jade88]

Hi Ployrin, it could be also that he is teething. So no appetite. My baby spit out all food during that phase, then he had all sorts of constipation issues, can go without poo for 8 days. When finally came, poo cannot come out I had to help him out. Very stressful indeed. My youngest is now 4, and I can honestly tell you, it only gets better. There were dark phases, cos like you I had to parents or in laws help. Everything learnt from Google as I was never exposed to kids before. I remembered crying a lot when I was overwhelmed, it was unbearable at times and depression crept in. But as my kids grew older, things got better and having experienced it, I can assure it will slowly get better. I shudder when I read your experience cos it brings back the time when I was struggling alone, pregnant and a toddler and no helper. It was very tough on top of that I had dogs. So my whole day, washing poo and pee for babies and dogs alone can take 2 hours. It was a lonely experience as hubby was busy with work travelling.
Hopefully this phase pass by quickly and he will start eating his solids regularly again. Please surround yourself with positive thoughts some relaxing music at home and find something that will take that stress slightly off. Give yourself a pat on the back, it's not easy being SAHM.