Miscarriage advice
- Thread starter Roxybury
- Start date
Twinkledust
Member
I am so sorry for your loss. Have u seen a gynae to get everything checked?
I went to kkh emergency as I was bleeding at night. They couldn’t see anything on ultrasound so I did blood test and was asked to go back 2 days for another blood test to determine the level in Hcg level. Sadly it dropped. But they didn’t wanna diagnose as miscarriage and asked me to go back for a 3rd blood test in 2 days. How many visits to the gynae can they confirm it’s a miscarriage? This is so excruciating. It’s been 4 days and I’m still bleeding 
I went to kkh emergency as I was bleeding at night. They couldn’t see anything on ultrasound so I did blood test and was asked to go back 2 days for another blood test to determine the level in Hcg level. Sadly it dropped. But they didn’t wanna diagnose as miscarriage and asked me to go back for a 3rd blood test in 2 days. How many visits to the gynae can they confirm it’s a miscarriage? This is so excruciating. It’s been 4 days and I’m still bleeding
Hi,
So sorry to hear this.
i went through miscarriage too, twice. The feeling of brokenness is unbelievable. So i totally understand your fear, sadness & frustration at the moment. Maybe you can approach a private gynae to get it check out as soon as possible. I remember the first time i went because i was bleeding, dr schedule me to come back for another check in a week time, second check up, they probe in gently to see the uterus, my uterus lining was already collapsing so the dr did tell me straight away that the pregnancy is no longer viable. It is better this way i feel, than to drag and dread going to the bathroom every single time.
hugs to you!
I also miscarried my first baby at 12 weeks just a few days short of the second trimester milestone. It was discovered at the 12 weeks scan, the ultrasound lady then told me the baby has shrivelled, was not growing and has no heartbeat. We were so devastated, I remained heartbroken for a very long time. We could already see the distinct shape of our baby, and had been making plans for the future with the baby. In the end, we had to make the painful decision of going through a D&C. During those few months thereafter, it was an indescribable cocktail of emotions comprising of jealous, envy, sadness and heartbroken-ness whenever I see pregnant women and remembered the poor baby that we were not able to bring to earth. However, there is nothing we can do and it is definitely no one's fault for the miscarriage. Rest well and prepare for your next pregnancy.
Thank you all for your replies. I feel you guys. I hope no one has to go through this process. Thank you for sharing your experience with me. Let’s continue fighting and not give up. I believe there are many women out there continue to have successful pregnancies after miscarriage.
Meanwhile, I will go to another gynae tmr and hopefully time will heal
Meanwhile, I will go to another gynae tmr and hopefully time will heal
Yes Roxybury, you will definitely have successful pregnancies after miscarriage. I went on to give birth to two sons thereafter. However, after one experience with miscarriage, it's inevitable to feel more anxiety on your subsequent pregnancies.
Thank you so much for giving me hope! I’m so happy for you!
❤May I ask if u did anything different from the first?
I did many things different, but I think one of the most significant difference was I also took TCM medicine for my subsequent pregnancies.
Another thing I did different was to prioritize pregnancy over career. In my first pregnancy, which ended in miscarriage, it was a threatened pregnancy from the start as I started spotting not long after discovering I was pregnant. The doc gave me hormone injections and ordered me to go on bed rest. However, I had many projects in progress and had multiple deadlines, hence I rejected doc suggestions to go on bed rest. I didn't know whether it will make any difference, but for my second pregnancy (I continue to have spotting issues), I forced myself to go on one month bed rest and literally put my work aside. Plus TCM medicine, my spotting issues stopped after one month, and I successfully delivered a full term baby at 38.5 weeks
That’s exactly what I did as well. I continued to work non stop after finding out that I was pregnant as well.
Thanks for your advice May I know which TCM med did u take?
For my first son, I went to TCM clinic at Blk 517 Jurong West St 52 as I was spotting and staying in the West then. For my second son, I went to Dr Tan Siew Buoy at 38 Upper Cross Street as I was trying to conceive and managed to conceive taking her medicine, hence I stayed with her to stabilise my pregnancy.
I shared my story on another thread, let me share here as well : Right after my wedding, my immediate superior called me into a meeting room and told me he wished I would postpone my family planning, as he wanted me to lead a project at the time. Stupidly, I agreed, and only started trying 2 years later at almost 33 after the project is completed. It took me almost 1.5 years to finally conceive at age 34+. During this first pregnancy, I worked so hard and even disregard my gynae's advice to go on bed rest, as I was overwhelmed by work and trying to meet multiple deadlines, despite my spotting issues (during that time, I didn't seek any TCM help). Unfortunately I miscarried my first baby (still makes me sad whenever I think about my unborn baby). During my performance review that year, my immediate superior informed me I was penalised for not partaking in certain projects, which was due to my pregnancy at the time (though I miscarried thereafter). Imagine my anger and disgust after hearing that from my superior! Totally lack of humanity and compassion. I vowed never to place career first thereafter, and was pregnant again 1 year later after that miscarriage. Once the doc confirmed and seen the gestational sac, my hubby ordered me to go on bed rest, and I literally went MIA (of course after informing my boss and HR about my month long hospitalization leave). When my boss tried to call me and find out why, I ignored his calls and didn't inform him of my pregnancy till 3-4 months later. He was obviously pissed and berated me for not informing why I went on HL as people were asking him. However, I maintained this is my personal life and I do not wish to share till I'm ready. For my subsequent pregnancies, as I shared in my earlier post, I seeked TCM help from Jurong West clinic and Upper Cross clinics. Both are good and require to brew herbs. On top of that, my mentality took a 180 degree change. I tried to relax and always emphasized on taking care of myself first before work.
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Wow you have come a long way! After reading your story, I’ve become more enlightened. You’re right, I should prioritise my pregnancy over work.
Thank you for sharing your story, I’m soo glad things turned out well for you!! Really appreciate your advice. I’m feeling better now. At least I know I can still try again.
I will visit the TCM you mention so I can heal my body faster. Thank you sooo much!!!
Every single person I know who miscarried went on to give birth to healthy babies. So don't worry and hope to hear good news soon!Twinkledust
Member
Thank you for sharing your inspiring story!
After this loss of mine, despite it being a mid term termination due to baby abnormalities, i also concluded that business and money can wait. Nothing else is more important than a healthy baby and happy marriage.
Thank you sooo much!!!
Hi Twinkledust, you definitely had it harder than me. It must be painful to have to make the decision to terminate a mid term pregnancy. The pain of losing a baby, which we have been carrying inside our bodies, is beyond heartbreaking. You are such a strong lady, it is incredible to see you encouraging others to be positive even when you have gone through such a traumatic experience. Jia you, I am sure you will have your rainbow baby soon!
Twinkledust
Member
Yes it was the most difficult decision i ever made but i know it is the best decision for the baby. But i did not have it harder than u, every loss is as painful no matter the circumstances.
After grieving over it, i wanted to just bury this part of me and never talk about it again because of the society we are in where miscarriages are never ever discussed. And i realised the support system we have in SG is so different from other countries where miscarriages are discussed openly. So i wanted to share my experience and let other women going through the same to know that they are not alone.
This is also part of my recovery stage : being able to talk about it.
I hope one day my rainbow baby will come when the time is right.
You are so right. It seems like everyone was so afraid to talk about miscarriage, perhaps they didn't know how to broach the subject and are worried of evoking sadness. This is also the reason why I wanted to share my experience, I hope anyone with similar experience can find some solace knowing someone has gone through the same pain, but eventually had their miracle babies thereafter.
Twinkledust
Member
Roxybury - have u seen a gynae? Hope all is ok for u.
Hello! Yup I’ve seen a gynae on Mon, it’s confirmed a miscarriage. My HCG dropped from 1000 to 300 within 2 days. After a few days of spotting, I started bleeding heavily with huge clots before it tapered off. Gynae said there was no gestational sac to begin with. Means the embryo didn’t even develop, no sac as well. That eased the pain a little.
Hi, can I check how the D&C process put to sleep or ?
From what I know which the doctor shared it to me 2 months back
its a very short operation just to remove the tissue inside.
u may google it for more info
Yes, that is correct.
BlueRedLane
New Member
What's the profile of your immediate supervisor? If he is single, divorcee or married with no kids, he will never understand our difficulties.