! Advice maid lied about returning back

[shop4stuffs]

Mymaid is due for renewal in nov 10. she told me early this yr she willcontinue with me but mid last mth she told me shes not. now i asked her again as i relly hope she can continue due to familarity.

can anyone advice me what should i takenote incase she just lie to me coz afraid of bad treatment etc?

not sure if its coz of my scolding or pay that she want dont want to continue liao. i felt its scolding but when talk to her she say nobody take care girl and shcl bus expensive so seems like telling me salary. but she told me dont wnat continue is the day after i scolded her but she kept denying its due to scolding....

i hv been feeling down lately coz of this issue coz on onehand ihope she stay but on the other i do not want to let her win else next time she will climb over my head. i have a 4mthold bb and 2yr old toddler in cc and 4mth taken care by maid.

 

[tncelia]

Mostly properply is the pay problem.Or she got better loubang.Or u can ask her indirectly weather she got better loubang outside isit?

I aso wondering weather to let my maid take care my 2nd wan which i will give birth next yr Jan?If not i cant go to work but i also scare she cant cope with it.And aso her contract end next yr June.

 

[bear27]

I think once ur maid wants to leave, no point asking her to stay, especially after you talk to her and she still dun sound keen.

It will be worst if she finally agree to stay, and u pay for airticket and other stuff. Then she go back and refuse to return. Then you waste the money and have no maid at all, and have to rush about trying to hire a new maid.

Since now she already inform you, then isn't it better to start looking for a suitable maid slowly? 'This is just my opinion lah. Cos I am in similar situation too, my current maid is great with my kids and they are all very attach to her, but I rather be prepared than to be caught unprepared if she decided not to return after returning home. I think that will be worse than retraining a new maid when I hv time nwo.

 

[judy_lsk]

Agree with YK

Your this maid may change her mind anytime.

Btw, i think it's due to both factor. Both scolding & salary.

 

[jazz2]

i am also facing a dilemna of whether to change my 4 years maid. cos i am expecting no 2. and u know, after 4 years, too familiar. She is always showing black face ...etc.

 

[sugarmummy]

Hi lovely girl,

Why dun u change ur maid? U said u dun let her touch ur girls, erm.. this way u'll let them feel u despise them n build hatred in them towards ur family, thats very dangerous.

There're nice maids out there too. I always believe to treat them like they r one of our family members n they'll treat u nice too. Laziness everyone also have, we ourselves sumtimes do laze, maids r human too. They shld be treated like a human. Everyone err right.

 

[sugarmummy]

I cant stand a maid like this too. If im u i wld have change her aldy. I have got some bad experience before, i agree not all maids r good, so just change the bad ones. I have a previous one who just came for 2 days, she slept halfway can scratch her private part so loud untill she woke my other maid(old bird) up n my old maid scream at her n wake her up ask her to go n wash her hands cos they have to make milk for my babies in the middle of the night. Immediately i changed her away the following day. So, those mummies who let ur kids slp with only the maid, u wont know what's happening in the middle of the night.

 

[penguins4u]

Actually not all maid is like that. Got good n bad ones. I'm also contemplating whther to hire a maid. I'm worried of the issues u all mentioned

 

[ratna]

Most important about hiring maid is do you think they comfortable to work with u? If not, there is no point to keep her. Or is she willing to work for you? If not, high salary or even better treatment only extend for short period.

 

[helloagain]

bad maids better send them back.. good maids better retain (can do some brainwashing, offer higher salary or extra perks/gifts, less scolding).

Its a matter on how u define "bad" and "good".. showing "black face" isn't a bad maid, it matter most is what are your priorities, y do u need a maid in the 1st place? can the other flaws be "close 1 eye"? If she can do her chores properly, then she is good. IF she doesn't take her work seriously, u better change. My 2nd maid is like disnetmummy, apologise,kneel down, cry then few days later, all the crap come out again, so its pointless. Most "old bird" will show "black face" but i feel if they can still deliver their job well, just let them be.. a good maid who can do all her chores as instructed is hard to come by, sometimes to retain them we must make them happy somemore but of course must still show u r the boss but also can't scold too much. they happy, they will continue to work, if not, when they leave, u will regret bcos u don't know what kind u gonna get the next one (what if the newcomer is a lier, kids-abuser, dirty etc?)

 

[helloagain]

shop4stuffs - if i'm u, i will try to brainwash her on y she shld stay on to work (eg money, familiarity with current employer is better than a new employer, etc) and try to offer her a better pay or offer other addition perks like gifts, gold etc. if she still want to go back, then u got no choice but to let her. its better that she is honest with u on whether she's coming back ornot then lie abt returning, u will end up wasting money and last min without maid!

 

[shopaholicmanic]

for me, if the maid wants to go bk, let her or else she will complain in future.
However, if you want to retain her, you would have to increase her pay as she wld if she was to go to another family.

For children, i still find filiphinos better. When getting 2 maids, it is best if they are of different nationality so that they will not be the best of friends and you'll know what is going on at home etc..

For me, I take care of my children with my filipino maid and the indonesian takes care of the h/h chores. When I pay their salary each month, I'll sit them down individually to ask them for comments and feedback. Vice versa, I will give them feedback.

 

[oneboyonegirl]

Do not give them their pay in full
Retain the money
eg. insurance
eg. Air tickets
Hold the money and if they return they can hv the money back

 

[erne]

Hi, lovely gal,
sadly to hear/read the conversation between you and the MOM. If there are other choices,I think nobody want to hire a maid. hear too many stories, I have changed three maids early this year.

 

[elaineko]

We have changed the maid two times since end of last year, which are the 1st one was ex-Singapore (last for 2.5 mth) and 2nd was transferred maid (old maid last for 1 mth) and yet we cannot keep them as they cannot meet our expectation. Therefore, we returned them to the agency (without panelty). Finally, we got a transferred Filipino maid (different agency) who work in Singapore for 5 yrs and now she work with us for almost 2 mths. We are very happy her.
If you don't have in-laws at home to watch the maid, my recommendation is to hire an experiance maid (pay more) to take care of housework, cooking and/or kids.
We also put our kids at infant & childcare center during working hours and pick them up after work.

 

[erne]

my in-laws will go back home next year. I am also thinking of sending my 2 years girl to childcare.

 

[chelz_mum]

Hi Lovely Gal,

May I know how does your maid looks like?

Does she has alot of pimples & pimples scars on her face?

My maid is also transferred maid. He name is Sumiati from Indonesia Lombok. My maid has been trying to borrow S$2K from me of course I keep rejecting her request

She told me her previous employer enganged her to look after Ah Mah. The Ah Mah passed away, thats why her employer returned her to the agency.

I employed her early August 2010.

Thanks

 

[chelz_mum]

Hi Lovely Gal,

My maid - Sumiati also always show black face to us... does she has alot of pimples??? I am very worry that I got your maid.... She is looking after my newborn with my MIL at home.

She has the same name with yr maid, same habit (eat alot, only want to eat good food, keep showing black face, I scolded her 2x, same thing she also kneel down & cry, caught lying many times, always take afternoon nap, etc)

I am very worry that I got your maid

(

 

[happyface1]

Well, Let me share my maid story. So far, within 7 yrs of marriage, i got 4 maid and out of 4 , 1 is so difficult to get along- feeling like slapping her type. so I have change back to my preious agency where the 3 good maid are with me. None of them stay with me due to some reason.
Mostly a change of envirnment and better salary out there - Hong Kong.

My current one is bad in the first few month - i believe is home sick. She Steal my HP and my HB HP call home and spending $200 .. Nevertheless, I told her if she had a problem, she had to tell me. Dont make this trust break. Thus , deduct her salary during her stay with me. I did not scold her and didn't expect her to do all the home hold stuff. Her main job is to take care my 3 childrens age 7, 3, 19mth. to bring them to school. It better to say that I am very nice to her as CHing Chai in hokkien. I pay her outfront when her home need the Money and tell her all the reason for advance pay. She understand.

While childrens asleep, she will clean the house. She cook and wash cloth too. She is make to act like a mother of the 3 of my childrens. I am to concentrate on my job instead, else no income. Hopefully, she will stay with me the next 2 years which end next yrs march 12.

 

[alicia80]

Feedback on Foreign Domestic Worker’s Conduct

An Foreign Domestic Worker (FDW) is expected to comply with Singapore's rules and regulations. The Government takes a serious view of FDWs who break the law or misbehave themselves.
For Penal Code-related Offences
If a Foreign Domestic Worker (FDW) is suspected of committing an offence (e.g. theft, child-abuse/elderly-abuse, threatening/harassing employer/family members, bringing strangers into her employer’s house without her employer’s consent) under the Penal Code, the employer should:
• Make a police report immediately; and
• Email a scanned copy of the police report to [email protected]. Please attention the email to Controller of Work Passes.
For Violation of Work Permit Conditions
Employers can provide feedback on their FDWs via email at [email protected]. The feedback should be attention to the Controller of Work Passes.
MOM will review the feedback given and take the appropriate action against the worker. The Ministry will only place the worker on an employment ban if she is charged and found guilty of an offence under Singapore laws, including offences under the Penal Code and the Employment of Foreign Manpower Act.

 

[bumblebee22]

AI, thanks for this info. I always have the thinking maid in SG here is really big. Didn't expect got such law for them to obey.

 

[babybee32]

Hi ladies,

Jts : My neighbour's maid who is taking care of a elderly recently bought a Bangalore back to the house a night. The old uncle happens to be awake at that time saw it n quickly call his daughter over. A police report was made and after a few hours , the police actually tell them that they can do much with this as the maids address was under the same address that she invited the bangalore over. It is funny as according to the police they wont be able to charge the man nor the maid. In the end , the owner can't do anything but to let the Bangalore off n send the maid home the very next day using their own hard earn money. Haizzzz... How sad ..

 

[happyface1]

Wow, that is really too much....

I hear my helper tell me that the maid has a date in the block downstair their block in the day time with the children she is taking care .

Send her home straight after that..

 

[sofiaquiroga]

I have never heard of this thing before? I ever wrote to MOM since my maid lied to me and ran away home they just said since its nothing to do with stealing etc hence cannot do anything.

cabin beds

 

[mehui]

Safer to send maids back once they start to vacillate over staying/leaving and also if they're using this to bait for large increase especially if they know you cannot do with them!

 

[stuartwild]

Go back and bring the grain next, but instead of leaving the chicken with the ... He gives a bellboy $5 to return to them but the bellboy is dishonest and gives ... After hearing the advice they jump on the camels and race as fast as they .... A prisoner is told "If you tell a lie we will hang you; if you tell the truth we will shoot you.

Cabin bed|Cabin Beds|Children's Rainwear