(2009/09) September 2009 MTBs
- Thread starter jenifur
- Start date
pamelia
Member
<font color="#6600ff"> Hi Mommies, I'm back!</font>
After battling with Kairi's fever and cough.. I got hit by the H1N1 2009 and was almost made to stay in hospital because I had a stupid persistent fever of 40.2degs. Staying in the hospital for almost half a day on their extremely uncomfortable bed caused me to be unable to do anything as I was weak and shivering on 4 bags of drips. Unable to do anything means unable to pump. When I insisted on going home. The next day I got greeted by RED ( You know what ) So there, Supply dipped and now I have to buy SANITARY PADS!!! ARGH!
After 2 weeks of wearing the stupid hot mask to sleep, carry Kairi and everything I do ('cept shower ) Now I am fully recovered after my continuous visits to CDC and I am discharged ( I don't have to go back anymore ) And I am IMMUNE to H1N1! Wee~~~
Up till now I have no idea how the hell I would have caught it. And it really was a scare for me. I was really worried Kairi would have caught it from me or I had caught it from her.
Now I am a bacteria intolerant freak. I carry a small bottle of dettol disinfectant with me wherever Kairi and myself goes to, and I spray and wipe anything Kairi may be in contact of ( baby high chair, table ) Yes I know the air would be filled with bacteria too, But I try my best to cut it down.
Falling sick is no joke. >.< The fear of passing it to your baby is there, Yet you can't leave your baby alone and away from you.
After battling with Kairi's fever and cough.. I got hit by the H1N1 2009 and was almost made to stay in hospital because I had a stupid persistent fever of 40.2degs. Staying in the hospital for almost half a day on their extremely uncomfortable bed caused me to be unable to do anything as I was weak and shivering on 4 bags of drips. Unable to do anything means unable to pump. When I insisted on going home. The next day I got greeted by RED ( You know what ) So there, Supply dipped and now I have to buy SANITARY PADS!!! ARGH!
After 2 weeks of wearing the stupid hot mask to sleep, carry Kairi and everything I do ('cept shower ) Now I am fully recovered after my continuous visits to CDC and I am discharged ( I don't have to go back anymore ) And I am IMMUNE to H1N1! Wee~~~
Up till now I have no idea how the hell I would have caught it. And it really was a scare for me. I was really worried Kairi would have caught it from me or I had caught it from her.
Now I am a bacteria intolerant freak. I carry a small bottle of dettol disinfectant with me wherever Kairi and myself goes to, and I spray and wipe anything Kairi may be in contact of ( baby high chair, table ) Yes I know the air would be filled with bacteria too, But I try my best to cut it down.
Falling sick is no joke. >.< The fear of passing it to your baby is there, Yet you can't leave your baby alone and away from you.
babiesmeme
New Member
Whats up, baby? : oh gosh, i am sssssooooooo sleepy......caden slept at 2am and wake up at 5am for milk, I wake up at 630am to prepare for work zzzzzzzz. He has been crying non-stop from 12 midnight right till 1plus am. Give him his fav toy he dont wan, play with him don wan, drink milk dont wan, biscuits dont wan, water dont wan everything dont wan...pacificer dont want, rock him, sayang him also dont want, help help!!!.in the end we obseve he keep on pushing his milk bottle to the left side of the mouth and we put jin feng shan on his gum, then he slowly eh eh eh,both of us tap him and he slowly fall asleep. Is he teething, he got two below already. This is the first time i experience, we are really clueless
pamelia
Member
<font color="#6600ff"> Rach, Just my two cents worth</font>
Financing a Housing loan is no joke. Hard as it may be after sticking to Rayanne for so long. ( Or Rayanne sticking to YOU for so long )You'd have to leave her to be independent without you around.
My hubs told me. Either you be attached to baby now and struggle for the future, Or you struggle and work hard now... And we'll all have a better future.
Kairi's really sticky... Sticks to me so much she doesn't even want her Daddy to carry her. But I just dump her with others when I really have stuff to do. Cry her lungs out she will when I just turn around and walk away from her, But I can't possibly get ANYTHING done if I were to pacify her all the time. Don't spoil her too much. Looking at my lil bro and how spoilt he was... Up till NOW. I don't wanna end up being on the verge of bursting a blood vessel with a spoilt kid to be a slave to.
I believe to spoil to a certain limit. Once you overdo it, our clever babies are sure to climb all over us. LITERALLY.
If your BP's aren't earning you much and you will be facing increasing housing expenses ( Esp when Rayanne grows older ) I think you should only do it when you have the extra free time. Organizing sprees and BPs are pretty time consuming. If you can divert the time spent on BP's and sprees on probably your main line. Guess it would be a better financial route to take?
Financing a Housing loan is no joke. Hard as it may be after sticking to Rayanne for so long. ( Or Rayanne sticking to YOU for so long )You'd have to leave her to be independent without you around.
My hubs told me. Either you be attached to baby now and struggle for the future, Or you struggle and work hard now... And we'll all have a better future.
Kairi's really sticky... Sticks to me so much she doesn't even want her Daddy to carry her. But I just dump her with others when I really have stuff to do. Cry her lungs out she will when I just turn around and walk away from her, But I can't possibly get ANYTHING done if I were to pacify her all the time. Don't spoil her too much. Looking at my lil bro and how spoilt he was... Up till NOW. I don't wanna end up being on the verge of bursting a blood vessel with a spoilt kid to be a slave to.
I believe to spoil to a certain limit. Once you overdo it, our clever babies are sure to climb all over us. LITERALLY.
If your BP's aren't earning you much and you will be facing increasing housing expenses ( Esp when Rayanne grows older ) I think you should only do it when you have the extra free time. Organizing sprees and BPs are pretty time consuming. If you can divert the time spent on BP's and sprees on probably your main line. Guess it would be a better financial route to take?
homeangel120
New Member
Hi mummies..just browse through the posts...interesting topics today...hehe
Itsy, corrine..my hubby also the same..while i m busy cleaning, fedding baby..he will be busy playing his game!! haiz..at time i nag, at time i jsut ignored. Sometimes he will help to bath the baby, then i will do the necessary "touch-up" work!
Btw, Itsy..you staying around the Buangkok MRT area isit? Atrina or Aspella? I m rushing home everyday since last week, so that i will have the chance to bring my baby walk walk in the neighbourhood area. Am wondering if we meet before?
Enxuan, We have the same dream! I have been dreaming of quitting my job recently and start a small business. Was thinking what should i do? property agent? some BP? toy rental? etc...But still dont have the courgae to quit my job!!
Itsy, corrine..my hubby also the same..while i m busy cleaning, fedding baby..he will be busy playing his game!! haiz..at time i nag, at time i jsut ignored. Sometimes he will help to bath the baby, then i will do the necessary "touch-up" work!
Btw, Itsy..you staying around the Buangkok MRT area isit? Atrina or Aspella? I m rushing home everyday since last week, so that i will have the chance to bring my baby walk walk in the neighbourhood area. Am wondering if we meet before?
Enxuan, We have the same dream! I have been dreaming of quitting my job recently and start a small business. Was thinking what should i do? property agent? some BP? toy rental? etc...But still dont have the courgae to quit my job!!
pamelia
Member
<font color="#6600ff"> Babiesme</font>
Probably more teeth emerging and cutting causing discomfort. Crankiness is something we can't really do anything about in a baby. But at least we tried.
Bear with it, It'll last no more than a month. XD
It's gonna happen on and off though. :3
Probably more teeth emerging and cutting causing discomfort. Crankiness is something we can't really do anything about in a baby. But at least we tried.
Bear with it, It'll last no more than a month. XD
It's gonna happen on and off though. :3
corinne> i have assigned tasks for my hubby to do for my baby. he will wash baby's clothes every tues n fri nite, hang them, n i will fold them, pack his sch bag. everyday after wk he will wash n sterilise all the bottles/pumps, den while i pump, he will feed baby and pack the sterilised bottles. if baby cant finish his milk, den i will continue feeding baby after i m done with my pumping. but hubby seriously refuse to change baby's diapers. dunno why, but he will wash his stained clothes
but as for housework, he only washes the clothes. initially is i vacuum floor, he mop, but now he din mop for long long time. grrs. but still he oredi got alot of things to do la. so i close one eye sometimes
prettymums> usually i lose, n i will end up clearing the dust -_-
lina> hehe. feel so much better, n ya. i think with a job, i can better provide for de family in case anything happens to my hubby's job
but as for housework, he only washes the clothes. initially is i vacuum floor, he mop, but now he din mop for long long time. grrs. but still he oredi got alot of things to do la. so i close one eye sometimes
prettymums> usually i lose, n i will end up clearing the dust -_-
lina> hehe. feel so much better, n ya. i think with a job, i can better provide for de family in case anything happens to my hubby's job
chellechelle
Active Member
<font color="ff0000"><font size="+1">Sept babies playgroup #2 </font></font>
Date: 28th May, Friday Vesak Day
Time: 1pm
Location: near Buangkok MRT
There is free parking at neighboring blk.
Food: If you guys wanna bring food then bring lor. Else I'll prepare drink and some snack.
Attendees...
Rach (Will try to make it) - 1 adult?
Kiki - 1 adult
Shirley - 1 adult?
Melissa - 1 adult (hubby can only confirm nearer to date)
Sheryn - 1 adult
Bernice - 1 adult
princessxiaomei - 1 Adult
waiwai (tentative) - 1 adult
kaira - 1 adult
Ling - 1 adult
joopz - 1 adult
milkyway - TBC
Ling - will try to join in
Date: 28th May, Friday Vesak Day
Time: 1pm
Location: near Buangkok MRT
There is free parking at neighboring blk.
Food: If you guys wanna bring food then bring lor. Else I'll prepare drink and some snack.
Attendees...
Rach (Will try to make it) - 1 adult?
Kiki - 1 adult
Shirley - 1 adult?
Melissa - 1 adult (hubby can only confirm nearer to date)
Sheryn - 1 adult
Bernice - 1 adult
princessxiaomei - 1 Adult
waiwai (tentative) - 1 adult
kaira - 1 adult
Ling - 1 adult
joopz - 1 adult
milkyway - TBC
Ling - will try to join in
Hello mummies.
How are you?
I'm still at office laze a bit
Now, I'm going through the MS stage.
But luckily not as bad as the first time.
Recently, I really have a big headach with my gal.
She has been super cranky. Stick to me and wants me to carry her all the time.
At night, she will wake up almost every hour and cry. Cos she need my attention.
She has been like this for almost one month (since the day that i realise pregnant).
I'm not sure is it bcoz she is teething that causes her crankiness.
But my mum said that, it could be the old folks saying, "zeng chong". Fighting for attention or favourtism.
Mummies, how did you managed with the child while you are pregnant?
Really need some advise.
I'm feeling "xin ku". Esp I'm having MS now. Got exhausted very easily.
How are you?
I'm still at office laze a bit
Now, I'm going through the MS stage.
But luckily not as bad as the first time.
Recently, I really have a big headach with my gal.
She has been super cranky. Stick to me and wants me to carry her all the time.
At night, she will wake up almost every hour and cry. Cos she need my attention.
She has been like this for almost one month (since the day that i realise pregnant).
I'm not sure is it bcoz she is teething that causes her crankiness.
But my mum said that, it could be the old folks saying, "zeng chong". Fighting for attention or favourtism.
Mummies, how did you managed with the child while you are pregnant?
Really need some advise.
I'm feeling "xin ku". Esp I'm having MS now. Got exhausted very easily.
babiesmeme
New Member
Pam: stupid us we should have know earlier that he is teething and gave him the jin feng shan! blur us!
Date: 28th May, Friday Vesak Day
Time: 1pm
Location: near Buangkok MRT
There is free parking at neighboring blk.
Food: If you guys wanna bring food then bring lor. Else I'll prepare drink and some snack.
Attendees...
Rach (Will try to make it) - 1 adult?
Kiki - 1 adult
Shirley - 1 adult?
Melissa - 1 adult (hubby can only confirm nearer to date)
Sheryn - 1 adult
Bernice - 1 adult
princessxiaomei - 1 Adult
waiwai (tentative) - 1 adult
kaira - 1 adult
Ling - 1 adult
joopz - 1 adult
milkyway - TBC
Ling - will try to join in
jiahui - TBC
Time: 1pm
Location: near Buangkok MRT
There is free parking at neighboring blk.
Food: If you guys wanna bring food then bring lor. Else I'll prepare drink and some snack.
Attendees...
Rach (Will try to make it) - 1 adult?
Kiki - 1 adult
Shirley - 1 adult?
Melissa - 1 adult (hubby can only confirm nearer to date)
Sheryn - 1 adult
Bernice - 1 adult
princessxiaomei - 1 Adult
waiwai (tentative) - 1 adult
kaira - 1 adult
Ling - 1 adult
joopz - 1 adult
milkyway - TBC
Ling - will try to join in
jiahui - TBC
happytobemum
Member
Just to share a story with you mummies..
My mom ever told me that my Dad has never helped to take care of me and my bro when we were kids. He usually go out play games with friends. At times, he did spend time playing with us, but he never helped in feeding us, rock us to sleep, bathe us or change our diapers.
When my son (his grand-son) was born, my dad was so excited that he got himself so involved. He helped to carry my son, feed him, play with him, help my mum to bath him, rock him to sleep and even change his diapers!!! Haha.. The power of "grand-son".
Anyway, as for my hubby, he is quite good lor. He will "auto" help to take care of my son. From sterilizing bottles to carrying my son to sleep. But the thing is hor, he will tired himself out at the end and then nag and complain that I never take care of my son -_-'''''''''''''''
Do I consider myself lucky or unlucky? haha!
My mom ever told me that my Dad has never helped to take care of me and my bro when we were kids. He usually go out play games with friends. At times, he did spend time playing with us, but he never helped in feeding us, rock us to sleep, bathe us or change our diapers.
When my son (his grand-son) was born, my dad was so excited that he got himself so involved. He helped to carry my son, feed him, play with him, help my mum to bath him, rock him to sleep and even change his diapers!!! Haha.. The power of "grand-son".
Anyway, as for my hubby, he is quite good lor. He will "auto" help to take care of my son. From sterilizing bottles to carrying my son to sleep. But the thing is hor, he will tired himself out at the end and then nag and complain that I never take care of my son -_-'''''''''''''''
Do I consider myself lucky or unlucky? haha!
happytobemum
Member
babiesmeme, pam > Is it safe to give bb jin feng shan? I am not familiar with traditional chinese medicine, not sure what is inside the ingredients?
infinity_star
Member
~maelyn~
My dad sounds like ur dad! He seldom take care of us when we were young.. n asked my mum to stop working n b sahm to take care of us when my sis is born.
Now he is super gan chiong over his grandson (my son), always will come n fetch me fr my hse to his hse... like to play with his grandson n not forgetting taking pics n videos! He will be so looking fwd to seeing his grandson every wk.. Hahaha... My mum say now old already, thinking oso change. : )
My dad sounds like ur dad! He seldom take care of us when we were young.. n asked my mum to stop working n b sahm to take care of us when my sis is born.
Now he is super gan chiong over his grandson (my son), always will come n fetch me fr my hse to his hse... like to play with his grandson n not forgetting taking pics n videos! He will be so looking fwd to seeing his grandson every wk.. Hahaha... My mum say now old already, thinking oso change. : )
infinity_star
Member
<font color="aa00aa">men and housework</font>
My hubby is a super tidy person.. he will nag at me or "scold" me sometimes if I didn't tidy up the place. He can stand abit of dirt but generally he likes clean as well. I like my place to be clean as well n I can't stand it if I see the kitchen n toilet dirty.. I will hv this eek Yucks feeling.. Over time, hv learned to close 1 eye after preggie as no energy n time to be so detailed in cleaning. Mil is using kitchen most of the time, I will clean up after her to minimise conflicts... Was thinking of getting an hourly helper to clean my hse twice a mth but hubby say kiv first.
ON bb matters, Initially hubby will help to pack bb bag when go out... After few times, ended up I am packing.. He will change diapers n feed but if bb poo... He will ask me to change his diapers cos he said I am more detailed in cleaning his bum -_-'''
Then when he's feeding bb, if my boy throw tantrums, he will gladly pass to his mum!
My hubby is a super tidy person.. he will nag at me or "scold" me sometimes if I didn't tidy up the place. He can stand abit of dirt but generally he likes clean as well. I like my place to be clean as well n I can't stand it if I see the kitchen n toilet dirty.. I will hv this eek Yucks feeling.. Over time, hv learned to close 1 eye after preggie as no energy n time to be so detailed in cleaning. Mil is using kitchen most of the time, I will clean up after her to minimise conflicts... Was thinking of getting an hourly helper to clean my hse twice a mth but hubby say kiv first.
ON bb matters, Initially hubby will help to pack bb bag when go out... After few times, ended up I am packing.. He will change diapers n feed but if bb poo... He will ask me to change his diapers cos he said I am more detailed in cleaning his bum -_-'''
Then when he's feeding bb, if my boy throw tantrums, he will gladly pass to his mum!
potbelly_burp
Member
Grandfather
same for my dad. He was busy working when my bro n I were young. Now he's super gan cheong over my daughter. Play with her, feed her n even sing her lullabyes!! I just joked with my bro that it's the 1st time I've heard my dad sing in the last 30 years!!
And before he left for his china tour with my mum he snapped a lot of photos of my daughter with his Hp. I asked him what he's doing. He said, "I'm taking photos of Yihui so that I can look at them when I miss her when I'm in china." then he n my mom left for their trip. Didn't even take his own daughter's (me) photo. Sigh.
same for my dad. He was busy working when my bro n I were young. Now he's super gan cheong over my daughter. Play with her, feed her n even sing her lullabyes!! I just joked with my bro that it's the 1st time I've heard my dad sing in the last 30 years!!
And before he left for his china tour with my mum he snapped a lot of photos of my daughter with his Hp. I asked him what he's doing. He said, "I'm taking photos of Yihui so that I can look at them when I miss her when I'm in china." then he n my mom left for their trip. Didn't even take his own daughter's (me) photo. Sigh.
hanabiwaiwai
Active Member
Enxuan:
same idea as u... how i wish i can start a small business... hope to find some partners who share similar interest
Jiahui:
take care... my #1 was quite sticky to me when i was pregnant with #2. i could not carry her when tummy grew bigger, so most of the time hubby carried her, i would just sit down and play with her. hang on there...
same idea as u... how i wish i can start a small business... hope to find some partners who share similar interest
Jiahui:
take care... my #1 was quite sticky to me when i was pregnant with #2. i could not carry her when tummy grew bigger, so most of the time hubby carried her, i would just sit down and play with her. hang on there...
chellechelle
Active Member
<font face="segoe print"><font color="#FF6666">HB Brown Rice Cereal</font>
Any mummies wana take over? I've got a BRAND NEW tin - Exp: 30 Jan 2011. I've ordered this tin bef lettin my gal try out n she doesnt like it at all. Have given away the old tin. Letting this go at $7. Please let me know if u want, I can bring to the playgroup "if i can make it".. =P
Else, collection from my place in Bedok.
</font>
Any mummies wana take over? I've got a BRAND NEW tin - Exp: 30 Jan 2011. I've ordered this tin bef lettin my gal try out n she doesnt like it at all. Have given away the old tin. Letting this go at $7. Please let me know if u want, I can bring to the playgroup "if i can make it".. =P
Else, collection from my place in Bedok.
</font>
peanutbutter
Active Member
mummies,
seeing the discussion thread here today, i want to recommend a great article in the straits times yesterday from a swedish statistician providing an alternative explanation that our country's low fertility rate is due to gender inequality. meaning that women don't want to give birth because men don't provide enough support. that was such an enlightening article. i made my husband read the entire article, had a discussion with him on the main points of the article, and he thought it was very very well written too.
for my case, i am a FTWM and both my toddler and baby go to childcare during office hours. outside of office hours me and my husband care for them on our own except for weekends when we cheat by bringing them to my mum's place where we get home cooked food and free babysitting services =) none of us here on the thread (or anywhere else in the world) can excel in the areas of work, family, children, self all at the same time. something has to give. so i feel that all of us have to agree with our better half what has to be compromised to ensure that the family unit stays sane. as for me, to ensure that we maintain our sanity, we do zero cooking, zero ironing and zero cleaning of the house. means the children have to eat out every day with us, nobody gets to wear well pressed clothes to work, entire family lives in a messy and dirty house 6 out of 7 days in a week (the house is only clean when the part time cleaner comes every tuesday). despite all of these, i'm happy with my arrangements because both of us get to work (we like what we do at work) and get to spend time with the kids. my husband's always bitching about how tough it is to care for two kids, how he has no life at all. but after reading yesterday's article we agreed that in a couple of years time when we look back at this hectic/messy period of our lives, we know that we would not exchange this for any other arrangement because the boys will be very close to us, plus grow up the way we want them to.
seeing the discussion thread here today, i want to recommend a great article in the straits times yesterday from a swedish statistician providing an alternative explanation that our country's low fertility rate is due to gender inequality. meaning that women don't want to give birth because men don't provide enough support. that was such an enlightening article. i made my husband read the entire article, had a discussion with him on the main points of the article, and he thought it was very very well written too.
for my case, i am a FTWM and both my toddler and baby go to childcare during office hours. outside of office hours me and my husband care for them on our own except for weekends when we cheat by bringing them to my mum's place where we get home cooked food and free babysitting services =) none of us here on the thread (or anywhere else in the world) can excel in the areas of work, family, children, self all at the same time. something has to give. so i feel that all of us have to agree with our better half what has to be compromised to ensure that the family unit stays sane. as for me, to ensure that we maintain our sanity, we do zero cooking, zero ironing and zero cleaning of the house. means the children have to eat out every day with us, nobody gets to wear well pressed clothes to work, entire family lives in a messy and dirty house 6 out of 7 days in a week (the house is only clean when the part time cleaner comes every tuesday). despite all of these, i'm happy with my arrangements because both of us get to work (we like what we do at work) and get to spend time with the kids. my husband's always bitching about how tough it is to care for two kids, how he has no life at all. but after reading yesterday's article we agreed that in a couple of years time when we look back at this hectic/messy period of our lives, we know that we would not exchange this for any other arrangement because the boys will be very close to us, plus grow up the way we want them to.
peanutbutter
Active Member
for those who are interested, i found the article posted on someone's blog ... http://thotspeak.blogspot.com/2010/05/finally-something-worth-reading-in.html
So sian n tired today I just wanna complain!!!
How do SAHM deal with facing baby 24/7?
Mummies look fwd to nite time when HB comes back n hopefully give a helping hand...
To have some minutes off to unwind n take a breather..
Yet HB is back frm work hoping to rest after a long day n callng for mummy every other minute cuz baby wants this n that... WhEn thngs not done, mummy get blamed.. Scolding.. Stares..
I just wonder and even feel that life would have been better being a single.. Nobody to report to, account to, can do whatever we want, anytime of the day...
Now I'm no longer I, can't do what I want, worse with a kid..
Totally controlled by the kid...
What am I living for??
Trying n doing my best n yet stil get blamed n scoldings...
Do I deserve that???
How do SAHM deal with facing baby 24/7?
Mummies look fwd to nite time when HB comes back n hopefully give a helping hand...
To have some minutes off to unwind n take a breather..
Yet HB is back frm work hoping to rest after a long day n callng for mummy every other minute cuz baby wants this n that... WhEn thngs not done, mummy get blamed.. Scolding.. Stares..
I just wonder and even feel that life would have been better being a single.. Nobody to report to, account to, can do whatever we want, anytime of the day...
Now I'm no longer I, can't do what I want, worse with a kid..
Totally controlled by the kid...
What am I living for??
Trying n doing my best n yet stil get blamed n scoldings...
Do I deserve that???
Sheryn> sorry, sometimes I feel she's a burden...
Maybe I'm stck with her for too long I'm getting insane...
She has never left my sight for more than 30min all her life...
She has never travelled anywhere 200m frm my place without me.... I've never left home without her....
I'm going crazy...
Maybe I'm stck with her for too long I'm getting insane...
She has never left my sight for more than 30min all her life...
She has never travelled anywhere 200m frm my place without me.... I've never left home without her....
I'm going crazy...
chellechelle
Active Member
<font face="segoe print"><font color="#FF6666">rach...</font>
i see something similar.. but if u can imagine my life... u may feel better lo...
im with my gal everyday 24/7 like u with rayanne... but diff is my hb as always away like most of u would know... even back till when i was still preggy.. he's always out of town. The most recent, he came back in apr aft 3 months in Korea n he's in cairo now for abt 2 weeks...
I've gotta settle almost everything on my own lo... Besides caring for Jaelle, I have to run errands, settle my own meals(except dinner cos my mil would cook now), wash(Jaelle is still on ebm; so gotta wash pump, bottles etc), laundry(every alt day), clean house(whenever possible)... these are some of the things ba... and like u all know, if babies get cranky.. thats it!
a lot of u mummies still can look forward to the end of the day to see ur hb.. but i can only look forward for weeks n months just to see him. even when he's back, i still have to handle lil things like.. changing her diaper.. reason? Daddy cannot handle le.. she's too active! Even when I was cooking, n she poops.. hb came to me to ask if i was done... Jaelle needs to change... i tink all of us here would say, he cant help to change ma???!!! right?
As for my gal, she is really V ACTIVE ah... she cant stay still! many have carried her n its one tough job.. cos she likes to turn here n there.. n fyi.. not just the head but whole body hor.. lying in bed with her also kena tortured.. she really has a fetish for my hair.. kept pulling n pulling. and cos she like to stand n she uses any part of me to so.. all v painful leh...
INSANITY? yes.. im very close to it most of the time... </font>
i see something similar.. but if u can imagine my life... u may feel better lo...
im with my gal everyday 24/7 like u with rayanne... but diff is my hb as always away like most of u would know... even back till when i was still preggy.. he's always out of town. The most recent, he came back in apr aft 3 months in Korea n he's in cairo now for abt 2 weeks...
I've gotta settle almost everything on my own lo... Besides caring for Jaelle, I have to run errands, settle my own meals(except dinner cos my mil would cook now), wash(Jaelle is still on ebm; so gotta wash pump, bottles etc), laundry(every alt day), clean house(whenever possible)... these are some of the things ba... and like u all know, if babies get cranky.. thats it!
a lot of u mummies still can look forward to the end of the day to see ur hb.. but i can only look forward for weeks n months just to see him. even when he's back, i still have to handle lil things like.. changing her diaper.. reason? Daddy cannot handle le.. she's too active! Even when I was cooking, n she poops.. hb came to me to ask if i was done... Jaelle needs to change... i tink all of us here would say, he cant help to change ma???!!! right?
As for my gal, she is really V ACTIVE ah... she cant stay still! many have carried her n its one tough job.. cos she likes to turn here n there.. n fyi.. not just the head but whole body hor.. lying in bed with her also kena tortured.. she really has a fetish for my hair.. kept pulling n pulling. and cos she like to stand n she uses any part of me to so.. all v painful leh...
INSANITY? yes.. im very close to it most of the time... </font>
<font size="+1"><font color="0000ff">ling,</font></font>
very soon I'll join u in the chores.. Except with my HB still in town... But sometimes I wish he isn't.. Not so stressful for me...
Dun sound that right, but well at least no bicker, quarrels n argues cuz of Rayanne..
Sometimes I wonder who's more impt to him?
Am I a slave or maid who's just entrusted to care for the baby cuz no one else is trustworthy??
Am i supposed to feel honored???
I just wanna be treated like a wife, a mother n a human.....
very soon I'll join u in the chores.. Except with my HB still in town... But sometimes I wish he isn't.. Not so stressful for me...
Dun sound that right, but well at least no bicker, quarrels n argues cuz of Rayanne..
Sometimes I wonder who's more impt to him?
Am I a slave or maid who's just entrusted to care for the baby cuz no one else is trustworthy??
Am i supposed to feel honored???
I just wanna be treated like a wife, a mother n a human.....
chellechelle
Active Member
<font face="segoe print"><font color="#FF6666">rach...</font>
well, with or without hb ard, he also like to say me tis n that cos of Jaelle de lo.. but also cos he always not ard, i tink he has started to realise that he cant blame me that much.. Im alone lo.. only a pair of hands leh..
I do feel the way u do also n many times in fact. But everytime i see her smile/ makin progress.. it melts my heart lo.. Like all my grumbles disappear.. Many times, I would just hope to feel loved n appreciated but its tough for my man lo.. those words are more ex than gold n diamonds to him.. even an auto hug from him would make my day.. but i just dun get any... sigh...
Im sure Ray loves n dotes on u.. Just need some balancing ba.. between ur family, ur job n sideline.. I personally feel u may be takin in too much... I believe u like to org things.. but U ARE ONLY HUMAN... </font>
well, with or without hb ard, he also like to say me tis n that cos of Jaelle de lo.. but also cos he always not ard, i tink he has started to realise that he cant blame me that much.. Im alone lo.. only a pair of hands leh..
I do feel the way u do also n many times in fact. But everytime i see her smile/ makin progress.. it melts my heart lo.. Like all my grumbles disappear.. Many times, I would just hope to feel loved n appreciated but its tough for my man lo.. those words are more ex than gold n diamonds to him.. even an auto hug from him would make my day.. but i just dun get any... sigh...
Im sure Ray loves n dotes on u.. Just need some balancing ba.. between ur family, ur job n sideline.. I personally feel u may be takin in too much... I believe u like to org things.. but U ARE ONLY HUMAN... </font>
i am also very impressed with sahm like ling cos u really take care of baby alone 24/7. although i am also somehow in rach's position (same job) but at least cos of jacob's doting grandparents, i can always throw him in either my parents or in laws' hse almost every evenings so at least i hv some time to wind down. even doing simple stuff like washing dishes ALONE at home can be liberating! i m enjoying myself now cos i can see his development at home and while i need to see my clients sometimes, i can drop jacob with my mum or ask her to come over. in a way, i think my clients are the ones who are neglected! then when i have some free time, i do a bit of bp for haha fun! i may wanna put jacob in ifc but those 2 days a wk kind so tt i can do a bit more work and for him to have more activities cos he is getting bored at home and he tires of toys/stuff quite fast. for me this arrangement seems like perfect! gg ifc to recee tmr!
as on hubs, he was so nice when i was preggie! he would even wash my underwear cos not convenient for me to squat and hahahaha help me wear clothes esp bottoms cos i would lose balance sometimes. did quite a lot of hsework and doted on me a lot. but after i delivered hor, dun dote on me so much liao! i love it when he is on term break for his course cos he will have more time with us. i do agree with gerald, men really need SPECIFIC instructions. tell him straight and things get done. for us, his duty quite simple, only help me wash bottles, pump and wadever is in the sink every morning. sometimes he will help to fold clothes, he loves to bath with jacob so tt's his job. but like itsy, etc hubby i need to literally walk ard the hse to collect the mess like clothes and diaper. i will also remind him to do hsework lor, like how long has he not touched the vacuum cleaner etc. sometimes he did complain lar, cos he is tired from work. so i asked him, "will u come home and still be expected to do work?" he said no, so i told him, "yah lor u also need a break from work right? i have been looking after baby for the whole day, i need a break too!" so he got the pix. during his sch term, i tried to do all baby's stuff and hsework so tt he can concentrate on his studies and work so when term break comes, i will apply for "long leave"! yeah! 1 more sem to go!!! on the whole he likes cleanliness more and actually complained tt i m messy! but he also dun really like part time helpers cos he dun like the idea of a stranger in the hse. so tt's y he helps in cleaning the hse. when he on form hor, he cleans really well lor! no complaints one. i m the kind who will mop ard the furniture, but he will lift and push everything aside and do a thorough job! but... er.... very long nv do liao. tt's y i niao him tt day!
jia you all mummies!
as on hubs, he was so nice when i was preggie! he would even wash my underwear cos not convenient for me to squat and hahahaha help me wear clothes esp bottoms cos i would lose balance sometimes. did quite a lot of hsework and doted on me a lot. but after i delivered hor, dun dote on me so much liao! i love it when he is on term break for his course cos he will have more time with us. i do agree with gerald, men really need SPECIFIC instructions. tell him straight and things get done. for us, his duty quite simple, only help me wash bottles, pump and wadever is in the sink every morning. sometimes he will help to fold clothes, he loves to bath with jacob so tt's his job. but like itsy, etc hubby i need to literally walk ard the hse to collect the mess like clothes and diaper. i will also remind him to do hsework lor, like how long has he not touched the vacuum cleaner etc. sometimes he did complain lar, cos he is tired from work. so i asked him, "will u come home and still be expected to do work?" he said no, so i told him, "yah lor u also need a break from work right? i have been looking after baby for the whole day, i need a break too!" so he got the pix. during his sch term, i tried to do all baby's stuff and hsework so tt he can concentrate on his studies and work so when term break comes, i will apply for "long leave"! yeah! 1 more sem to go!!! on the whole he likes cleanliness more and actually complained tt i m messy! but he also dun really like part time helpers cos he dun like the idea of a stranger in the hse. so tt's y he helps in cleaning the hse. when he on form hor, he cleans really well lor! no complaints one. i m the kind who will mop ard the furniture, but he will lift and push everything aside and do a thorough job! but... er.... very long nv do liao. tt's y i niao him tt day!
jia you all mummies!
Rach
Same as you,since birth of Ian, he never leave my side. The only long break I got was 3hrs when my mum looked after him so I can go for a haircut. Other than that, I have only 10 min of ME time a day when I bathe. Very frastrating esp when I wait and wait for hubby to return hoping for some rest but he'll always return late and after dinner continue with his paper work. I just keep reminding myself that no one is going to benefit if I blow my top. He got to work, Ian got to be taken care of, so I have to do it lor. Take a deep breathe and think of all the good times, cute thing Rayanne does and u will feel better. Sleeping helps too. Maybe u slow down on ur bp?
Hahah Wait till u get ur own place. Household chores is a killer! Tot I just did laundry, another basket fills up. Tot I just vac, then I see hair on the floor! Neverending ah! Hubby asked why I have to go supermarket every weekend, wah then what? Grocery will fly to our house issit?! Haha
Rach, dun be too upset lah. Talk to ur hubby when u r feeling better, let him know how u feel and try to work out some arrangment so u can take a break too. Get them to babysit so u can go out for a few hrs. I tell u, the 3 hours of freedom I had sound pathetic but that was when I felt liberated! First time in my life, I felt this way! U should try it.
Same as you,since birth of Ian, he never leave my side. The only long break I got was 3hrs when my mum looked after him so I can go for a haircut. Other than that, I have only 10 min of ME time a day when I bathe. Very frastrating esp when I wait and wait for hubby to return hoping for some rest but he'll always return late and after dinner continue with his paper work. I just keep reminding myself that no one is going to benefit if I blow my top. He got to work, Ian got to be taken care of, so I have to do it lor. Take a deep breathe and think of all the good times, cute thing Rayanne does and u will feel better. Sleeping helps too. Maybe u slow down on ur bp?
Hahah Wait till u get ur own place. Household chores is a killer! Tot I just did laundry, another basket fills up. Tot I just vac, then I see hair on the floor! Neverending ah! Hubby asked why I have to go supermarket every weekend, wah then what? Grocery will fly to our house issit?! Haha
Rach, dun be too upset lah. Talk to ur hubby when u r feeling better, let him know how u feel and try to work out some arrangment so u can take a break too. Get them to babysit so u can go out for a few hrs. I tell u, the 3 hours of freedom I had sound pathetic but that was when I felt liberated! First time in my life, I felt this way! U should try it.
princessxiaomei
Active Member
Hi mummies,
On and off i am able to read the thread but by the time i want to type something, i have to log off to attend to my baby. I have so much so much so much to say. I can't even blog that much. So much had happened too. To make most of you feel much better.... i should share how i have been coping.. and how my life has been going on...
*Don’t bother to read if you dislike people complaining… and I will be typing according to how I feel right now… it might be rojak as my mind is really rojak!)
Like Enxuan, my hb works with SAF. His working hour is the most terrible one... one course after another... endless course i should say! During each course, most of the time he can't come home.. else come home at midnight, leaving the house even before the sun is out which is around 5am? He sleeps not more than 5hours a day. Some of the weekends, he has to report to camp for duty or whatever, which means he won't be back home. I don't get to see him often. Neither does his son get to see him often. He has so many buddies.. one group often call him and ask him out.. due to work, he rejected. When not at work, less busy, he would be with them... over this matter, i have quarrelled with him million times until i give up! The very last quarrel - a very big fight - make me give up on this issue totally! Baby and I hardly get to spend quality and quantity time with hubby……. Yet my hb will always say one thing in a very sarcastic manner… “My parents very pitiful, cannot get to see baby. This day this day we go back to my parents’ house.” The way he says this is sibei sibei sibei sarcastic okay! Even when he’s the one busy, he will want me to bring baby from my house to my mum’s house and to his parents’ house. Just like tomorrow, he wants me to bring baby back (last week he was busy never go) on my own (he’s on course thus knock off very late). I said that baby is still unwell and you want me to go out of the house? I didn’t go out since last week when he fell sick… then he got pissed… saying sarcastic remarks…. I kept quiet and he knew I wasn’t happy. Quarrels start again! End up, I told him, afternoon I am meeting my family for a belated mothers’ day lunch.. evening I will go to your parents’ house… he was shock that I am going to meet my family… and wants me to go to his parents’ house on my own… and wants me to be early! Since he is so busy with work, he already had not much time with baby… so usually I would hope he will shower for him during weekends and spend much more time with him… but seemed like my weekends are like my weekdays.. not much difference.. just that I see my hb’s face! I give up… I don’t even want to ask him to shower him etc…. he once said to me during a big quarrel : “You aren’t working, you’re the mother, I have to work so hard… your responsibility is much more than me in looking after him….” I got a shock! Aren’t our responsibility equal? Another one he said which makes me so hurt: “Baby don’t really want me is because of YOU. Every time we quarrel, you complaint bad things about me to him…!” It’s always ME ME ME! I’m always the one at fault, I don’t know why. I was so hurt and depressed… I kept myself at my own house with my baby… rejecting all friends… and one fine day he stomp out of the house…. Never came home… I was crying so badly… I brought my baby down and tried looking for him… but he left… I waited and waited till 12am, tried calling him but he kup my phone and then switched it off. Next few days, I just stayed at home with my baby. Now I have my own place, not much conflicts with in laws as in the past as I don’t see them often.. and I hack care too… so I have to help to do housework…. I make it a point to sweep daily… try to ‘mop’ the floor 2-3 times a week… I even tried to cook even though I don’t really know how to…. I tried my best to lighten my hb’s ‘workload’ at home…. But he doesn’t seemed to appreciate. Many of my friends said that I treat him too good.. I didn’t even pump my milk – asking him to feed and wash and sterilise bottles! He only need to look after him 10-15mins when I am bathing…… that’s all! But he still get fed up when he’s in a bad mood. Even when I am typing here, I am feeling so upset that my tears kept rolling down. My baby is such an active baby… crawls around, pulling everything down, putting things into his mouth which can or cannot fit into it, flips like roti prata when I try to change him,…. He’s extremely active.. even my PD says so! Many times I have to watch him or carry him while I do housework or cook… I haven’t complaint to him for being tired… I did so much… for what? I love my baby, I love my hb… so much that I sacrifice all my time for them… end up my hb take me for granted. I totally give up. I have no idea what to do to make him understand and appreciate for who I am and what I do for him. Looking after active baby by yourself ain’t easy but I know I can do it. I have to do it. To add on, my baby had been falling sick since he’s 2mths old… sick 2-3 weeks, recover 1 week, sick 2-3 weeks, recover 1 week till NOW.. going to 8mths old…. Sick and teething at the same time, tires me so much… his sleep is disrupted all the way! Cranky, unwell…. I am the one looking after him by myself. I felt like a single mom, just that my title is MRS. Why my baby fall sick easily…. Despite breastfeeding him all the way….. I only knew it last week when I brought him to the PD.. he has sensitive airway! Past few times he fall sick is because of my cousin, my nephew, my niece, my uncle… pass here pass there…. I avoid them but sometimes they it’s really hard for them to avoid us. Feeding medicine and sucking his mucus is a torture to both of us…. He would cry and struggle so badly… end up he only take in less than half the dosage. With these, my relatives pressing me to work so that I can unload my hb’s financial burden which I also agree. But again, due to some problems, I cant work yet. I am really tired. Very tired. I desperately need a listening ear, a shoulder to cry but I don’t have time for this. I am keeping everything inside. Not I want to, is I don’t have a chance to do it. Few times I type negative thoughts in my facebook, my hb’s KPO buddies will call him ask him.. YOU QUARREL with her? What happen? Etc etc….. and my hb will come and scold me… can’t I type what I want in my facebook? I really don’t know what to do. Already have so much problems in my head, and I am really very unlucky… some of you would know what my hp died on me a month ago.. within the next few days, my laptop crashed too.. now my camera! These 3 items are my top most precious as I use them daily. And it’s not cheap items… to me, its not cheap. I felt so frustrated.
Sigh.
Back to my baby’s issue.. since he has been so active and when I am trying to cook, he kept crawling to no-no area…. And its so dangerous and tiring to keep coming to and fro from the kitchen to living room to look after baby and watch over the fire! And I thought of getting a playpen… then my hb says what for! Expensive yet he might not want to be in it… then I said borrow from my cousin, he said not very good cos of some family issue. Wah lau… really angry… I guessed my hb and I really have to talk but he just don’t have time to do it…. Hais… and soon he might be posted overseas for 4-5 months!
24 hours a day, i don't even have 20mins for myself to do things i want do like facial, surf the net, shit! If baby naps long, i get it if i'm done with cooking/housework. Imagine he never naps few times, nt even 5mins! i live my daily life just fr baby and hb... none fr myself..
I might hv to swallow my meaLS, irregular meals yah... shower pee poo in a rush!! everything in a rush.... most of the time!!!!!!!!!!
Oops! My baby coughed till wake up now!
Those who read through, I thank you for your time and “ear” and “eyes”. And hope that with some of my problems stated above, can make every one of you feel much better and more blessed..
Hope that what i type here will be kept as private in here...... none of my own friends or hb's friends can know such things happen or else my marriage will really tear apart. I am willing share it here so that all of you can feel much better when think of my situation. Thanks, i trust all of you.
On and off i am able to read the thread but by the time i want to type something, i have to log off to attend to my baby. I have so much so much so much to say. I can't even blog that much. So much had happened too. To make most of you feel much better.... i should share how i have been coping.. and how my life has been going on...
*Don’t bother to read if you dislike people complaining…
and I will be typing according to how I feel right now… it might be rojak as my mind is really rojak!) Like Enxuan, my hb works with SAF. His working hour is the most terrible one... one course after another... endless course i should say! During each course, most of the time he can't come home.. else come home at midnight, leaving the house even before the sun is out which is around 5am? He sleeps not more than 5hours a day. Some of the weekends, he has to report to camp for duty or whatever, which means he won't be back home. I don't get to see him often. Neither does his son get to see him often. He has so many buddies.. one group often call him and ask him out.. due to work, he rejected. When not at work, less busy, he would be with them... over this matter, i have quarrelled with him million times until i give up! The very last quarrel - a very big fight - make me give up on this issue totally! Baby and I hardly get to spend quality and quantity time with hubby……. Yet my hb will always say one thing in a very sarcastic manner… “My parents very pitiful, cannot get to see baby. This day this day we go back to my parents’ house.” The way he says this is sibei sibei sibei sarcastic okay! Even when he’s the one busy, he will want me to bring baby from my house to my mum’s house and to his parents’ house. Just like tomorrow, he wants me to bring baby back (last week he was busy never go) on my own (he’s on course thus knock off very late). I said that baby is still unwell and you want me to go out of the house? I didn’t go out since last week when he fell sick… then he got pissed… saying sarcastic remarks…. I kept quiet and he knew I wasn’t happy. Quarrels start again! End up, I told him, afternoon I am meeting my family for a belated mothers’ day lunch.. evening I will go to your parents’ house… he was shock that I am going to meet my family… and wants me to go to his parents’ house on my own… and wants me to be early! Since he is so busy with work, he already had not much time with baby… so usually I would hope he will shower for him during weekends and spend much more time with him… but seemed like my weekends are like my weekdays.. not much difference.. just that I see my hb’s face! I give up… I don’t even want to ask him to shower him etc…. he once said to me during a big quarrel : “You aren’t working, you’re the mother, I have to work so hard… your responsibility is much more than me in looking after him….” I got a shock! Aren’t our responsibility equal? Another one he said which makes me so hurt: “Baby don’t really want me is because of YOU. Every time we quarrel, you complaint bad things about me to him…!” It’s always ME ME ME! I’m always the one at fault, I don’t know why. I was so hurt and depressed… I kept myself at my own house with my baby… rejecting all friends… and one fine day he stomp out of the house…. Never came home… I was crying so badly… I brought my baby down and tried looking for him… but he left… I waited and waited till 12am, tried calling him but he kup my phone and then switched it off. Next few days, I just stayed at home with my baby. Now I have my own place, not much conflicts with in laws as in the past as I don’t see them often.. and I hack care too… so I have to help to do housework…. I make it a point to sweep daily… try to ‘mop’ the floor 2-3 times a week… I even tried to cook even though I don’t really know how to…. I tried my best to lighten my hb’s ‘workload’ at home…. But he doesn’t seemed to appreciate. Many of my friends said that I treat him too good.. I didn’t even pump my milk – asking him to feed and wash and sterilise bottles! He only need to look after him 10-15mins when I am bathing…… that’s all! But he still get fed up when he’s in a bad mood. Even when I am typing here, I am feeling so upset that my tears kept rolling down. My baby is such an active baby… crawls around, pulling everything down, putting things into his mouth which can or cannot fit into it, flips like roti prata when I try to change him,…. He’s extremely active.. even my PD says so! Many times I have to watch him or carry him while I do housework or cook… I haven’t complaint to him for being tired… I did so much… for what? I love my baby, I love my hb… so much that I sacrifice all my time for them… end up my hb take me for granted. I totally give up. I have no idea what to do to make him understand and appreciate for who I am and what I do for him. Looking after active baby by yourself ain’t easy but I know I can do it. I have to do it. To add on, my baby had been falling sick since he’s 2mths old… sick 2-3 weeks, recover 1 week, sick 2-3 weeks, recover 1 week till NOW.. going to 8mths old…. Sick and teething at the same time, tires me so much… his sleep is disrupted all the way! Cranky, unwell…. I am the one looking after him by myself. I felt like a single mom, just that my title is MRS. Why my baby fall sick easily…. Despite breastfeeding him all the way….. I only knew it last week when I brought him to the PD.. he has sensitive airway! Past few times he fall sick is because of my cousin, my nephew, my niece, my uncle… pass here pass there…. I avoid them but sometimes they it’s really hard for them to avoid us. Feeding medicine and sucking his mucus is a torture to both of us…. He would cry and struggle so badly… end up he only take in less than half the dosage. With these, my relatives pressing me to work so that I can unload my hb’s financial burden which I also agree. But again, due to some problems, I cant work yet. I am really tired. Very tired. I desperately need a listening ear, a shoulder to cry but I don’t have time for this. I am keeping everything inside. Not I want to, is I don’t have a chance to do it. Few times I type negative thoughts in my facebook, my hb’s KPO buddies will call him ask him.. YOU QUARREL with her? What happen? Etc etc….. and my hb will come and scold me… can’t I type what I want in my facebook? I really don’t know what to do. Already have so much problems in my head, and I am really very unlucky… some of you would know what my hp died on me a month ago.. within the next few days, my laptop crashed too.. now my camera! These 3 items are my top most precious as I use them daily. And it’s not cheap items… to me, its not cheap. I felt so frustrated.
Sigh.
Back to my baby’s issue.. since he has been so active and when I am trying to cook, he kept crawling to no-no area…. And its so dangerous and tiring to keep coming to and fro from the kitchen to living room to look after baby and watch over the fire! And I thought of getting a playpen… then my hb says what for! Expensive yet he might not want to be in it… then I said borrow from my cousin, he said not very good cos of some family issue. Wah lau… really angry… I guessed my hb and I really have to talk but he just don’t have time to do it…. Hais… and soon he might be posted overseas for 4-5 months!
24 hours a day, i don't even have 20mins for myself to do things i want do like facial, surf the net, shit! If baby naps long, i get it if i'm done with cooking/housework. Imagine he never naps few times, nt even 5mins! i live my daily life just fr baby and hb... none fr myself..
I might hv to swallow my meaLS, irregular meals yah... shower pee poo in a rush!! everything in a rush.... most of the time!!!!!!!!!!
Oops! My baby coughed till wake up now!
Those who read through, I thank you for your time and “ear” and “eyes”. And hope that with some of my problems stated above, can make every one of you feel much better and more blessed..
Hope that what i type here will be kept as private in here...... none of my own friends or hb's friends can know such things happen or else my marriage will really tear apart. I am willing share it here so that all of you can feel much better when think of my situation. Thanks, i trust all of you.
princessxiaomei
Active Member
Pamelia: u r immuned to h1n1, guessed baby and i too! He gt it wen he was nt evn 3 mths old! Glad u r well now! (;
Rach: i believe ur hb earns more than my hb.. N u wil hv sm savings too. I hv borrowed abt 30over thousand frm my aunt and we hv to start paying her. Both of us indeed facing financial probs and struggling w it.. I cant send baby to ifc too due to $$ n i find it mad to send cus if i send him der, meanin i m gg work.. N i wil b workin in a presch! And my salary wun b high.. Paying sch fees is higher than wad i draw.. So i m mad if i send rite! Haha.
Stay calm. Smile. I guess i am in the worst situation as compared to most of u.. Bt i jux hv to walk and see how as e day goes by.. Hv to force ourselves to b positive else evrytin in our head ia negative.. At least u gt to earn sm $$ frm BP.. I earn nth and cant earn anytin.. And u can go out so often bt nt fr me. I hv to help babysit at my mums hse etc.. Evrytin i do isnt fr myself.. I totally hv no me-time. Even wen i shower,i muz rush!
Stay happy!! 加油！
I already give up... Though i still hope for miracle to happen!! Hoping my financial, my prob w hb,... Will improve!!! I just hv to force myself to b happy.. No choice!
Goodnight! Tml gonna rush frm one hse to another hse to another hse jux bcos everyone wants to see my baby!
Smile (; be strong ok!
Rach: i believe ur hb earns more than my hb.. N u wil hv sm savings too. I hv borrowed abt 30over thousand frm my aunt and we hv to start paying her. Both of us indeed facing financial probs and struggling w it.. I cant send baby to ifc too due to $$ n i find it mad to send cus if i send him der, meanin i m gg work.. N i wil b workin in a presch! And my salary wun b high.. Paying sch fees is higher than wad i draw.. So i m mad if i send rite! Haha.
Stay calm. Smile. I guess i am in the worst situation as compared to most of u.. Bt i jux hv to walk and see how as e day goes by.. Hv to force ourselves to b positive else evrytin in our head ia negative.. At least u gt to earn sm $$ frm BP.. I earn nth and cant earn anytin.. And u can go out so often bt nt fr me. I hv to help babysit at my mums hse etc.. Evrytin i do isnt fr myself.. I totally hv no me-time. Even wen i shower,i muz rush!
Stay happy!! 加油！
I already give up... Though i still hope for miracle to happen!! Hoping my financial, my prob w hb,... Will improve!!! I just hv to force myself to b happy.. No choice!
Goodnight! Tml gonna rush frm one hse to another hse to another hse jux bcos everyone wants to see my baby!
Smile (; be strong ok!
<font size="+1"><font color="0000ff">ling, cookies, itsy, princess</font></font>
thanks for sharing n it dud make me felt a little better...
We're all human n we will get down sometimes... We are not steel... N it's kindda comforting to know we have similar frenz who can empathize with us... So we dun feel alone...
Ling, I always tell ppl n HB that I'm a multi-tasker n perhaps u are right... I'm multi-tasking too much.. But that's cuz I need the $$.. Every cents count that I'm home n not out working... Even 4pairs of sock at $10 can last me a day if I'm not out..
Because I've already dumped my capital on the goods, watever I receive is considered my allowance... With sprees, the cents I earn can't pay for anything much but better than n cent at all... Since I'm home n "doing nothing," mightas well do something... I'm a very helpful person By natur. N since young, I'm the kind that will help classmates buy things cuz I always happen together things cheaper where I stay...
Now as I'm typing I rem makng five stones to sell for 50cents when I was in primary school.. I would ask my Mum for cloth n measure n cut n put green beans inside n sew them myself... Guess I'm a entrepreneur by nature too!! Lolx....
Anyway, ya... N the points charge to my CC helps to offset $10-$20 of my singtel bill.... Some ppl just wonder what spreeiss earn?? Cents n points Lo... Not like hundreds of bucks each time... Really cents... Sometimes $1plus... Alot meh?? Unless doing many many batches maybe $10-$20... But it's rare..... But I LIKE doing it n feeling useful...
But maybe I need a break sometimes.. But when I stop, cents also stops... So I just continue to do Lo.....
But soon I probably gotta stop n start packing for my house n unpacking when we shift... Sian... Hate doing that....but for the sake of our own place, maybe it'll all be worth it...
N in that time, gotta think how n where to find money....
Princess, I got no savings... 0!!! Only debts to service... Since wedding till now, haven't lead a debt free life... Hope n pray this kind of life will be over soon... But with renov loa. N installments, think another 5 yrs ba.... Sigh....
At least HB is working very hard like mad now for our own place... He's running 4 sites simutaneously n still meeting new clients.. He leaves home 8-9am n won't be back till 11-12am most of the time.. In fact almost everyday... Only certain days, he'll make arrangements to spend time with us then we get to go shopping or watch movie... Else I hardly get to see him much... Maybe 1hr a day when he's back cuz I'm still sleeping when he's up... N sleeping on the same bed is not counted...
Sigh... 家家有本难念的经。
thanks for sharing n it dud make me felt a little better...
We're all human n we will get down sometimes... We are not steel... N it's kindda comforting to know we have similar frenz who can empathize with us... So we dun feel alone...
Ling, I always tell ppl n HB that I'm a multi-tasker n perhaps u are right... I'm multi-tasking too much.. But that's cuz I need the $$.. Every cents count that I'm home n not out working... Even 4pairs of sock at $10 can last me a day if I'm not out..
Because I've already dumped my capital on the goods, watever I receive is considered my allowance... With sprees, the cents I earn can't pay for anything much but better than n cent at all... Since I'm home n "doing nothing," mightas well do something... I'm a very helpful person By natur. N since young, I'm the kind that will help classmates buy things cuz I always happen together things cheaper where I stay...
Now as I'm typing I rem makng five stones to sell for 50cents when I was in primary school.. I would ask my Mum for cloth n measure n cut n put green beans inside n sew them myself... Guess I'm a entrepreneur by nature too!! Lolx....
Anyway, ya... N the points charge to my CC helps to offset $10-$20 of my singtel bill.... Some ppl just wonder what spreeiss earn?? Cents n points Lo... Not like hundreds of bucks each time... Really cents... Sometimes $1plus... Alot meh?? Unless doing many many batches maybe $10-$20... But it's rare..... But I LIKE doing it n feeling useful...
But maybe I need a break sometimes.. But when I stop, cents also stops... So I just continue to do Lo.....
But soon I probably gotta stop n start packing for my house n unpacking when we shift... Sian... Hate doing that....but for the sake of our own place, maybe it'll all be worth it...
N in that time, gotta think how n where to find money....
Princess, I got no savings... 0!!! Only debts to service... Since wedding till now, haven't lead a debt free life... Hope n pray this kind of life will be over soon... But with renov loa. N installments, think another 5 yrs ba.... Sigh....
At least HB is working very hard like mad now for our own place... He's running 4 sites simutaneously n still meeting new clients.. He leaves home 8-9am n won't be back till 11-12am most of the time.. In fact almost everyday... Only certain days, he'll make arrangements to spend time with us then we get to go shopping or watch movie... Else I hardly get to see him much... Maybe 1hr a day when he's back cuz I'm still sleeping when he's up... N sleeping on the same bed is not counted...
Sigh... 家家有本难念的经。
happytobemum
Member
Princessxiaomei > I trully salute your strong Endurance and Perseverance! Jia You Oh!!
potbelly_burp
Member
I salute all the 24/7 sahms out there, ESP those who hv to manage alone. It happened to me during my maternity period. No wonder mothers get post natal depression from the sheer amt we hv to do. I've learnt to let go and lower my standards. It makes life easier for me and the ppl around me.
My friend told me that a lot of couples face marriage problems because of children. When a child is born it automatically becomes the center of our universes and spouses get neglected. This is inevitable. However our children will grow up some day and live their own lives whereas we only hv our spouses who will be with us when we grow old. So we need to treasure each other.
For couples who are facing problems you may want to go to marriage counsellors. They do a great job as a 3rd party because sometimes we r too involved in our own woes to see the problems that others are facing.
At the end of the day, why care about what others like relatives think? If we are going to be unhappy to go out of our ways to please them then don't bother. Life is short, live to make ourselves happy. There are simply too many ppl in the world to please and there's no end to it.
All mothers out there, jia you!!
My friend told me that a lot of couples face marriage problems because of children. When a child is born it automatically becomes the center of our universes and spouses get neglected. This is inevitable. However our children will grow up some day and live their own lives whereas we only hv our spouses who will be with us when we grow old. So we need to treasure each other.
For couples who are facing problems you may want to go to marriage counsellors. They do a great job as a 3rd party because sometimes we r too involved in our own woes to see the problems that others are facing.
At the end of the day, why care about what others like relatives think? If we are going to be unhappy to go out of our ways to please them then don't bother. Life is short, live to make ourselves happy. There are simply too many ppl in the world to please and there's no end to it.
All mothers out there, jia you!!
peanutbutter
Active Member
princessxiaomei and rachel,
being a SAHM and being financially stretched is really no joke. hopefully "ranting" here on the forum occasionally will help you gals release some stress.
princessxiaomei,
maybe 18 months onwards can consider sending your boy to childcare. cheaper by then, and you can also teach at the same school he is attending. think this was one of your plans when you were pregnant right? marriage counselling is actually a viable option for you to consider because you can use the marriage counsellor's help to convey to your husband that you dislike bringing baby to your in-law's place on your own, you dislike husband sacrificing the little weekend time that he has on his buddies. but your husband might have a fit if you suggest the counselling idea to him lah.
being a SAHM and being financially stretched is really no joke. hopefully "ranting" here on the forum occasionally will help you gals release some stress.
princessxiaomei,
maybe 18 months onwards can consider sending your boy to childcare. cheaper by then, and you can also teach at the same school he is attending. think this was one of your plans when you were pregnant right? marriage counselling is actually a viable option for you to consider because you can use the marriage counsellor's help to convey to your husband that you dislike bringing baby to your in-law's place on your own, you dislike husband sacrificing the little weekend time that he has on his buddies. but your husband might have a fit if you suggest the counselling idea to him lah.
chellechelle
Active Member
<font face="segoe print"><font color="#FF6666">Thanks cookiezz n itsy...
To rach n princessxiaomei...</font>
Its really no easy tasks at all but will always have to try n tell ourselves "im not the worst.. n will nv be cos there is always others facing more difficulties. Not gloatin but like princessxiaomei... she's is facing so much alone.. so what's mine? I really peifu her. Now i remember those days when we were still preggy n both princessxiaomei n i would grumble abt our hb's being away all the time.. n like u, our babies are so active! its really v tirin to look aft them hor? Jaelle's pd said the same too.. very active! gotta take extra care when lookin aft them...
as for rach, u like what ur doin so much but if it causes conflicts then its not worth it lo.. use those time spent organising to bond with family will make us happier lo.. hb will grumble less also.. Im not sayin to stop totally but control n balance within ur means...
We all jiayou together ya? *hugz*</font>
To rach n princessxiaomei...</font>
Its really no easy tasks at all but will always have to try n tell ourselves "im not the worst.. n will nv be cos there is always others facing more difficulties. Not gloatin but like princessxiaomei... she's is facing so much alone.. so what's mine? I really peifu her. Now i remember those days when we were still preggy n both princessxiaomei n i would grumble abt our hb's being away all the time.. n like u, our babies are so active! its really v tirin to look aft them hor? Jaelle's pd said the same too.. very active! gotta take extra care when lookin aft them...
as for rach, u like what ur doin so much but if it causes conflicts then its not worth it lo.. use those time spent organising to bond with family will make us happier lo.. hb will grumble less also.. Im not sayin to stop totally but control n balance within ur means...
We all jiayou together ya? *hugz*</font>
chellechelle
Active Member
<font face="segoe print"><font color="#FF6666">michelle...</font>
tho' im alone, im still considered ok ba.. im tryin to stay positive... i churn the time spent on having -ve thoughts to pend for his return instead... life gets goin n better for me this way... </font>
tho' im alone, im still considered ok ba.. im tryin to stay positive... i churn the time spent on having -ve thoughts to pend for his return instead... life gets goin n better for me this way... </font>
<font color="0000ff">sandwich</font> thanks for highlighting the article; very good read, indeed very true to our society. i've posted the article in my facebook
must ask my hubby go and read
<font color="0000ff">Rach</font> I understand what you are going through as I did experience this when i was staying at home taking care of Kate. I got so frustrated with facing baby 24/7, doing household chores, cook dinner and to top that up, hubby coming home wanting to "REST" and not helping out with baby until one day, i sms-ed him (while he was out having fun with his colleagues on a friday night)and told him "if you dont come home now, I will pack my bags and walk out of the house"!
Since then we talked things out and he's a little more "auto".
Things got better when i started working (better for ME, mentally and emotionally as i have more ME time at work), and physically better too (at least not loosing anymore weigh)
One day, during our homegroup meeting, we had this couple sharing on roles of wives and husband and it was then when all of us poured out our woes and he then, realised that we both work to put food on the table, both pays for home loan etc...so baby is a shared responsibility too!....I can see the change in my hubby since then, now he hangs clothes automatically when the washing machine stops, at night he wakes up to cradle baby to sleep (while i continue sleeping, heheh!)
<font color="0000ff">Ling</font> I salute you!! Not many people are made to be SAHMs...and for your case, WITHOUT help somemore!! (and you are still NOT complaining...
)
<font color="0000ff">Rach</font> I understand what you are going through as I did experience this when i was staying at home taking care of Kate. I got so frustrated with facing baby 24/7, doing household chores, cook dinner and to top that up, hubby coming home wanting to "REST" and not helping out with baby until one day, i sms-ed him (while he was out having fun with his colleagues on a friday night)and told him "if you dont come home now, I will pack my bags and walk out of the house"!
Since then we talked things out and he's a little more "auto".
Things got better when i started working (better for ME, mentally and emotionally as i have more ME time at work), and physically better too (at least not loosing anymore weigh
) One day, during our homegroup meeting, we had this couple sharing on roles of wives and husband and it was then when all of us poured out our woes and he then, realised that we both work to put food on the table, both pays for home loan etc...so baby is a shared responsibility too!....I can see the change in my hubby since then, now he hangs clothes automatically when the washing machine stops, at night he wakes up to cradle baby to sleep (while i continue sleeping, heheh!)
<font color="0000ff">Ling</font> I salute you!! Not many people are made to be SAHMs...and for your case, WITHOUT help somemore!! (and you are still NOT complaining...
<font color="ff0000">sandwich,</font>
Thanks for the article. I couldn't agree more of some of the main points the professor mentioned. Your government didn't make the right policies to encourage childbirth. Wonder if any of those policy making people read this article? And it's also our society, it takes a long time for people to change thier mindset.
<font color="ff0000">Rach,</font>
I was wondering how much money you could make by organising BP/spree. Now you said it, then it's really not worth it lor. I am very sure your time is a lot more precious than just the few cents or bucks. Take a break from the BP/spree. Have a good talk with your hub. Work out a plan for the family. You family is you+hub+Rayanne, and not hub and you+Rayanne. Work out something for the family. Like what sandwich said, being a SAHM and being finincially stretched is really no joke. If you have the choice to change the situation, you should try it out.
<font color="ff0000">Itsy,</font>
For grocery shopping, I have just started to use the NTUC online services. Just within a few clicks, the goods will be sent to your house! Delivery fee is only $8, which I think is worthwhile, cos I will order all those bulky and heavy items. With 2 kids now, it's almost impossible for us to do grocery shopping, esp for bulky and heavy items. Just like when we are at work, when we cannot handle something, thinnk "OUTSOURCE"! Options are aplenty out there!
<font color="ff0000">princessxiaomei,</font>
It's really hard on you to have to take care of your boy alone without your hub around and had to face the issues of your ILS, for me, I won't survive 1 month, you are a great woman, who does so much for your family! You have to overcome your problems, no one can help you, but yourself!
I know your baby is active, but hey, isn't it good to have an active baby? Active baby learns faster and develops faster and hence are brighter, if you can provide the right environment for him to learn. My #1 crawled everywhere when he was 7 months and started walking at 10 months. I never thought that it's a bad thing woh. As long as you put all those dangerous stuff out of his reach, then it's okay, let him explore, you continue to do your stuff and check on him once a while.
For meal time, I always let my kids join in our meals. So I schedule my bb feeding time into ours as much as possible. So when we are having meal, I will feed her cereal/puree concurrently. Women are good in multitasking, aren't we? At least you have a meal more properly without having to pour it in. You can give it a try!
<font color="ff0000">RE: Housework</font>
Again, whenever you feel your can't cope - OUTSOURCE. We started to engage a part time helper to come to help once a week. Help to free up our time so much! And no more nagging! Since I was pregnant with #1 till I was pregnant with #2, my hubby was the one who did all the heavy duty housework, he didn't complain that much, but just that I felt those precious weekends can be used on our kids instead of doing all the dirty housework. So I got a part time helper in. Have been great for us so far!
Thanks for the article. I couldn't agree more of some of the main points the professor mentioned. Your government didn't make the right policies to encourage childbirth. Wonder if any of those policy making people read this article? And it's also our society, it takes a long time for people to change thier mindset.
<font color="ff0000">Rach,</font>
I was wondering how much money you could make by organising BP/spree. Now you said it, then it's really not worth it lor. I am very sure your time is a lot more precious than just the few cents or bucks. Take a break from the BP/spree. Have a good talk with your hub. Work out a plan for the family. You family is you+hub+Rayanne, and not hub and you+Rayanne. Work out something for the family. Like what sandwich said, being a SAHM and being finincially stretched is really no joke. If you have the choice to change the situation, you should try it out.
<font color="ff0000">Itsy,</font>
For grocery shopping, I have just started to use the NTUC online services. Just within a few clicks, the goods will be sent to your house! Delivery fee is only $8, which I think is worthwhile, cos I will order all those bulky and heavy items. With 2 kids now, it's almost impossible for us to do grocery shopping, esp for bulky and heavy items. Just like when we are at work, when we cannot handle something, thinnk "OUTSOURCE"! Options are aplenty out there!
<font color="ff0000">princessxiaomei,</font>
It's really hard on you to have to take care of your boy alone without your hub around and had to face the issues of your ILS, for me, I won't survive 1 month, you are a great woman, who does so much for your family! You have to overcome your problems, no one can help you, but yourself!
I know your baby is active, but hey, isn't it good to have an active baby? Active baby learns faster and develops faster and hence are brighter, if you can provide the right environment for him to learn. My #1 crawled everywhere when he was 7 months and started walking at 10 months. I never thought that it's a bad thing woh. As long as you put all those dangerous stuff out of his reach, then it's okay, let him explore, you continue to do your stuff and check on him once a while.
For meal time, I always let my kids join in our meals. So I schedule my bb feeding time into ours as much as possible. So when we are having meal, I will feed her cereal/puree concurrently. Women are good in multitasking, aren't we? At least you have a meal more properly without having to pour it in. You can give it a try!
<font color="ff0000">RE: Housework</font>
Again, whenever you feel your can't cope - OUTSOURCE. We started to engage a part time helper to come to help once a week. Help to free up our time so much! And no more nagging! Since I was pregnant with #1 till I was pregnant with #2, my hubby was the one who did all the heavy duty housework, he didn't complain that much, but just that I felt those precious weekends can be used on our kids instead of doing all the dirty housework. So I got a part time helper in. Have been great for us so far!
<font color="ff6000">ling</font>
sorry! cant meet u today cos hub's got sth on so i cant go my mum's place le! will contact u again!
on active babies, mine also! sigh he fell from his cot 2 wks back and the cot was on the highest setting somemore. he was learning to pull himself to stand for the first time and he could master it so well tt he over stretch himself while trying to grab stuff from the cupboard nearby. luckily he is ok if not i will not forgive myself. now his new muse is the ikea plastic tub. will put him inside and flood him with toys and keep him occupied for a while. haha safe and good! dunno he will be "fooled" for how long!
sorry! cant meet u today cos hub's got sth on so i cant go my mum's place le! will contact u again!
on active babies, mine also! sigh he fell from his cot 2 wks back and the cot was on the highest setting somemore. he was learning to pull himself to stand for the first time and he could master it so well tt he over stretch himself while trying to grab stuff from the cupboard nearby. luckily he is ok if not i will not forgive myself. now his new muse is the ikea plastic tub. will put him inside and flood him with toys and keep him occupied for a while. haha safe and good! dunno he will be "fooled" for how long!