IVF with KKH (Tan HH)

baby_sparkles said:
rachelt: then u shall insist with the review doc to seek ur own doc's opinion.. see what they say.

babydusty: congrats!!! we are close cycling buddies then. my FET is fri :) KKH practice is thaw and transfer on the same day, which i prefer too. im afraid my embbies cannot survive in lab for too long
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i think in nuh they thaw a day before. how many u going to thaw? i have only one frozen, really hope it survive. so scary!
 


Baby sparkles, yes I fell sick during stimms and also the tww... But still. BFP so don't think it affects.

But. I am back to the ivf gp again... Just lost my baby. Going for d and c on Mon and will probtry a fresh cycle in Jul... Jiayou to those in tww now! :)
 
baby_sparkles said:
hi mei: what happened??! so sorry to hear that :(
no HB or BB didnt grow? did you previously post a msg on ur low HCG?
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Bb stopped growing. Also no heartbeat. Yup my pregnancy started off with low HCG..
But Tan HH was very nice and understanding... Do u know if he will be the one to do d and c? Don't want like a random MO to do cuz it is a sensitive procedure...
 
hi_mei, hope u r feeling ok. take care...dont worry, my tcm says it will be easier for those who've bfp before to strike again. Will join u in jul! :)
 
Thanks all for the encouragment :) will just have to pick myself up and try again. At least I know I can be pregnant even though it ended early.

Baby sparkles how was ur FET today?
 
baby_sparkles said:
Hi mei u saw my link to my blog ?

It was a long long wait today but managed to fet two expanding BL.

Can only pray and hope for the best now as I have abit of phobia
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hopefully @baby_sparkles everything gonna be alright. u just have to pray and stay safe for now.

my ET will be on tuesday. me too phobia since we have a history of mc.

how many hospitalization leave does kkh give u?

can i read ur blog too baby_sparkles ???
 
Hi babysparkles, i read ur blog. V inspiring! How are u feeling?
Hope u strike this time round. It is a v gd thing u can put in BLs!
 
Hello! I will be returning red eggs to Zhu Sheng Niang Niang at Shuang Lin Temple tomorrow noon (4 May). Please collect if you want :) Babydust!
 
Hi ladies, I'm supposed to start stim today but I opt to postpone till next mth as Dr Tan will be away for my ER and ET.
Very disappointed as I've been waiting for this day to come and now got to wait for another month.
Anybody cycling with me in jun??
 
happy_mtb said:
Hi ladies, I'm supposed to start stim today but I opt to postpone till next mth as Dr Tan will be away for my ER and ET.
Very disappointed as I've been waiting for this day to come and now got to wait for another month.
Anybody cycling with me in jun??
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@happy_mtb.. Me! Me! *raise hands high up*
Dont be sad or disappointed.. Take it as a blessing.. Maybe your body need a little more time before the session starts :)
 
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baby_sparkles said:
thanks hi mei.. i rested quite abit over the weekend and yest. im back to work today..
generally alright but i keep looking for implantation spotting :(
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Hi baby sparkles, implantation spotting happens to a minority of ppl... Did it happen for the cycle that bfp last time?
Btw I was wondering if u knew where to get cheap ovulation strips? Cuz I find the ones at watsons v ex. To better plan the ivf cycles.
Stay calm and cool at work :) don't stress. Saw fr ur blog ur BLs were good :) good sign alr.

sarah2012 said:
Hi ladies,

Just started stimming. Today is day 2 of injections. Wonder if I need to steer clear of uncooked food like sashimi and oysters from now on? Thanks!
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Think it is ok to eat as long as it is clean. But dun eat after ET.
 
Hi mei, cheap ovulation strips can buy from qoo10. Oni $1 plus per strip. Heard review quite gd. I bot the pregnancy strip to test before.
 
baby_sparkles said:
i got all my HCG and OPK sticks from qoo10. very cheap and good..

himei: yes i had implantation spotting during the Dec bfp. light pink spots on liner and when i wiped.
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Thanks kim chi ger and baby sparkles. Think I will go get from qoo10.

Baby sparkles, Every cycle is different. Some have implantation spotting one cycle but not the next. Try not to symptom spot and hope for the best :)
 
Hi all I was wondering if any of u considered taking half year off work to concentrate on ivf?

I am considering it if my next cycle fails. Feel that my job is stressful, involves a lot of walking, etc. To give u an idea of the stress, I will wake up at 3am every night thinking of work.... And every time I go on HL its like damn stressful having to manage things when u are not physically in the office. Taking time off mb will help.

However, got these few considerations that keep me from it:

1. Loss of income. Really a lot, esp for half year and ivf is so ex.

2. Scared I start to overthink things when left alone=more stress.

3. My promotion and career track prob badly affected after this.

4. Hb not happy as we need to repay housing loan. However, I have enough savings to cover my share for a yr.

Sorry for the long post...but really in a dilemma....
 
hi_mei said:
Hi all I was wondering if any of u considered taking half year off work to concentrate on ivf?

I am considering it if my next cycle fails. Feel that my job is stressful, involves a lot of walking, etc. To give u an idea of the stress, I will wake up at 3am every night thinking of work.... And every time I go on HL its like damn stressful having to manage things when u are not physically in the office. Taking time off mb will help.

However, got these few considerations that keep me from it:

1. Loss of income. Really a lot, esp for half year and ivf is so ex.

2. Scared I start to overthink things when left alone=more stress.

3. My promotion and career track prob badly affected after this.

4. Hb not happy as we need to repay housing loan. However, I have enough savings to cover my share for a yr.

Sorry for the long post...but really in a dilemma....
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Hi mei. I went thru the same dilemma as u. I never thought ttc is such a hard journey. I never thought I needed more rounds of ivf.

But I also knew time wasn't on my side. The earlier we do, the better. I also have a very stressful job. Multiple deadlines, impossible missions, tasks that you cannot say do too.

I eventually decided to ask for 7months no pay leave. Enough to try 2 cycles.

I have a blog that documents my thoughts and consideration of applying npl. Iamcircles.blogspot.sg

if u ask me, I felt that my npl was a right choice. My tcm doc also said my pulse had been better since I stopped work. As if I was allergic to work.

Money wise, yes I am depleting my savings. All the kkh visits and medicine and tcm doc reviews are paid by me. No allowance from hubby one. A bit duh la. But money can earn back. As long as stabilise fast fast, I will go back to work to get my vitamin M back.
 
hi_mei said:
Hi all I was wondering if any of u considered taking half year off work to concentrate on ivf?

I am considering it if my next cycle fails. Feel that my job is stressful, involves a lot of walking, etc. To give u an idea of the stress, I will wake up at 3am every night thinking of work.... And every time I go on HL its like damn stressful having to manage things when u are not physically in the office. Taking time off mb will help.

However, got these few considerations that keep me from it:

1. Loss of income. Really a lot, esp for half year and ivf is so ex.

2. Scared I start to overthink things when left alone=more stress.

3. My promotion and career track prob badly affected after this.

4. Hb not happy as we need to repay housing loan. However, I have enough savings to cover my share for a yr.

Sorry for the long post...but really in a dilemma....
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Hi @hi_mei.. Maybe good to talk to ur hb and come to an agreement.. Else oso very jia lat.. Cos if dont agree you'll be lagi stress?.. here's what i think and what DH and me will be doing.. these are things we've agreed upon before we even went think if IVF..

1. are you not using the govt co-pay scheme for ur IVF?.. heard might not need to pay out anything in cash.. for our case..
-- we are only left with 1 year as i'll be 40 next july.. so we're gonna make use of this co-pay scheme for our procedure..

2. start a new hobby or restart your hobby or things u like to do in the past..
-- i used to love doing cross stitching.. i might just go back to doing it during my TWW to distract myself..

3. we cant have the best of everything i guess.. must weigh which is impt for you.. if bb is something you both really wan.. if so.. i think it's a small sacrifice..
-- i'm thinking of retiring once i have my bb and done utilizing my maternity leave.. both DH and me agrees that bringing up our own kid will be more satisfying and also we can inculcate the right values to them.. it's a journey of no turning back.. once they're all grown up.. we'll miss the best part of their growing up..

4. i dont really know how to reply on this.. but to share on my own personal "action forward".. our new place will only TOP next year.. the housing loan will kick in and with bb and also the high possibility of me quitting.. this will have to fall on my DH's shoulders.. and we've also agreed.. if the burden is too heavy for DH, i'll find a part time job to help with the 家用..

I recently met a gf on the bus after work.. she told me she really feel like quitting her job and be with her 3 kids.. i asked her why not since her hb's got a stable career and all.. her reason was she's living veri comfortably now and getta bring her children on holiday thrice a year.. and she dont feel like giving up her current lifestyle.. and my reply to her was.. if she's willing to sacrifice, she cant complain she's missing out on her kid.. and she nod in agreement and sadness..

I think ultimately it's up to the couple.. and the key is to be contented and live within our means.. we decided we wont buy a car.. we'll take public transport as this will ease almost S$2k off our belt.. with that amount.. we can do alot more stuff with the kid.. these are things that's hard to decide especially here in this little island where everything is so darn expensive.. but if there's a will there's a will.. that's my thoughts and 3-cents worth :)
 
Ladies.. Are your company's ok with you taking so long NPL?.. I know mine if take so long NPL come back might have no job.. I take MC and A/L oso kena question lor.. No privacy.. Quite sickening..
 
rachelt said:
Ladies.. Are your company's ok with you taking so long NPL?.. I know mine if take so long NPL come back might have no job.. I take MC and A/L oso kena question lor.. No privacy.. Quite sickening..
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Not every company is so supportive, but it is an increasing trend. Mostly it would be an intense discussion between you and your boss. There was a forum sister who had difficulty too, her boss told her that he didn't support her decision to undergo IVF cos she will have to take MC and AL and he wanted her to work full time so he would not need to find a temp to replace her.
 
MichNg said:
Not every company is so supportive, but it is an increasing trend. Mostly it would be an intense discussion between you and your boss. There was a forum sister who had difficulty too, her boss told her that he didn't support her decision to undergo IVF cos she will have to take MC and AL and he wanted her to work full time so he would not need to find a temp to replace her.
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This kinda boss really low EQ.. But I'm glad the new EA takes care of PMEs.. We've always been on the losing end with no support from the govt.. If not for the 70% of unjust termination on pregnant ladies and the govt wanting locals to multiply, think we'll still be bullied by coys..
For my coy.. Tho my boss keeps asking me to get pregnant and he seems ok when I told him I'm going for IVF.. Certain things he said still does sound negative.. When I told him there'll be HL after ER.. He says not necessary.. Why must take so long.. Blah blah blah.. But i heck it :rolleyes:
 
baby_sparkles said:
actually if the bosses or companies do not approve HL or IVF or NPL for such reason i think it is a co. not worth wasting our sweat for. Govt is pro baby pro family, so how can employers not be pro too?? When i told my boss i had a MC and will take some time away from office, he said ok take as long as u want and come back when u are ready. my management also said the same thing to me..

but till now im not sure if my co actually approves a IVF HL. ive not tried but dun wish for them to know too. i just took a HL and stated other women related reason.
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baby sparkles, you are right and this is an increasing trend of awareness in women in singapore, which I am grateful. But sadly, there are some companies, industries and bosses which do not prescribe to such idea as they are driven by $$$ still.
Also, in the end, the boss can still say, you can take all the HL, AL, MC, UPL etc that you want but your work will still be your responsibilities, your deadlines and reports / projects still need to be met, etc. It is very sad, but true.
 
baby_sparkles said:
actually if the bosses or companies do not approve HL or IVF or NPL for such reason i think it is a co. not worth wasting our sweat for. Govt is pro baby pro family, so how can employers not be pro too?? When i told my boss i had a MC and will take some time away from office, he said ok take as long as u want and come back when u are ready. my management also said the same thing to me..

but till now im not sure if my co actually approves a IVF HL. ive not tried but dun wish for them to know too. i just took a HL and stated other women related reason.
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@baby_sparkles.. i agree with you.. not worth it right..
but like what @MichNg says.. corporate companies are somewhat money driven.. so to them.. us being on HL/ML just means they'll needa get some1 to cover and pay 2 salaries.. so some might just axe off one of the heads to cover the cost ba.. anyway.. dont care la.. we just concentrate on producing our next generation..
 
I have a friend, currently on maternity leave.... very worried that her job will be taken away before she goes back. Another friend in Australia, was told 1 week before returning fr maternity leave that she don't need to go back, no severance pay, no notice period. Corporate life can be so cruel.
 
MichNg said:
I have a friend, currently on maternity leave.... very worried that her job will be taken away before she goes back. Another friend in Australia, was told 1 week before returning fr maternity leave that she don't need to go back, no severance pay, no notice period. Corporate life can be so cruel.
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We count ourselves fortunate.. EA covers and makes sure we do not suffer unjust dismissal during pregnancy and ML.. At least till we finish our 4 months ML we're safe..
 
I also don't know if I should tell my abt my IVF plan. I just took 2 weeks of HL for lap surgery. If tell him abt IVF and the potential annual leave and HL I'm gonna take, it will surely affect my appraisal.
I have a colleague who went on ML.. was supposed to get promoted. But when came back, no promotion. Questioned the boss. Reason boss gave was she was on ML, 4 mths of absense, cannot justify for promotion. But how abt her other 8 mths of hard work? :mad:
 
Unless u are the super career woman type, I think most of us here just want a healthy baby more than anything else. So heck the promotions etc.
Side note, I'm seeing Dr Tan for the first time tmr. Anything to take note / bring along?
 
Hlixian said:
Unless u are the super career woman type, I think most of us here just want a healthy baby more than anything else. So heck the promotions etc.
Side note, I'm seeing Dr Tan for the first time tmr. Anything to take note / bring along?
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That's true, although my boss didn't agree with me on that. Of which just caused me to lose respect in him la.
 
Thanks circles, baby sparkles and Rachel for yr advice. Ya i kinda decided that mb I won't take the NPL route but I will ask to step down from my current management role. Too stressful and too much responsibilities. At least there is still money coming in tho with lower pay. i am about to utilise my last co-funding for the next cycle. If fail again need to pay full amt.... :( So need to save up because I think my hb is not happy our $$ is flying away cuz of baby making. Even for the d n c I just did, he asked whether can just wait for natural miscarriage cuz the d n c costs 2000 plus... Haiz luckily discovered my company got insurance coverage for that.

Regarding companies... Many of them are not v pro family I feel. When I was younger and all my friends applying for first job, some of them were asked outright, "do u have a bf?", "u intend to marry and have kids?" My friend replied no to all and got the job. If it is an SME I can understand cuz they are really surviving by the hook, but bigger coporate firms should be more understanding. As if the 10-12h work days are not enough....
 


@Hlixian, have u confirmed to do IVF or still researching? Dr Tan will patiently explain / answer your questions, but for me, he kinda expect me to google things myself sometimes..... dunno if good or bad.
 
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