!!!!!!!!!! Anyone can help to advise? Divorce Issues

[aladin]

Please help.
My sister is in the midst of divorcing her husband(found out has mistress but no evidence) now.
Got few hiccups/question:-
1) My sister has sort of argument with her own lawyer. Reason is due to the bil put a lock at the martimontal house. My sister called up her lawyer saying what if she needs to get her things. The lawyer asked my sis get the key from him. But my sister refused and says thats her own house and she has the right. The lawyer then says 'then who ask u to move out!'...

Question 1 : Can my sis change the lawyer? File in Feb 2010 this year. Any cost involved?

2) The husband requested for joint custody. He is willing to pay 1k for the son (10yr old).

Question 2: What is joint custody? If we dun want joint custody, does it mean we cant get 1k?

3) We would like to limit the access and overnight stay because the son doesnt want to see the father.

Question 3: Can we seek family counsellor for third party opinion to acccess the boy and let the judge knows? Because we dont want to create stress (esp suicidal) for the boy esp now he is v happy and doesnt want to see his father anymore.

 

[sunshineg]

All your questions are more appropriately answered by your sister's lawyer.

About getting into the house to get her stuff, the most practical way is to ask her husb for the keys.

Qn 1: of course your sister can change lawyers. She will have to pay all the costs incurred by the current lawyer, as well as his fees to date.

Qn 2: joint custody
this is where both parents will agree on all major decisions for the child, e.g. school, religion etc. It is a separate issue from maintenance of the child (the $1k)

Qn 3: counsellor
It is possible to request for a counsellor and for the counsellor's opinion to be submitted to the court.

for Questions 2 & 3, you may want to read the Family Court's website FAQ - http://www.ifaq.gov.sg/subcourts/apps/fcd_faqmain.aspx

just follow the link above and type in your query.

hope this helps...

 

[fab_mum]

hi,

qn 2.
joint custody mean both parents gets to decide together major decision. eg: go wat school, religious.

care & console is who the child gets to stay with/ take care by. (usually judge in favour of mum, esp child in tender age)

& $1k is not ur bil want give then give, dun want give then dun give de. lawyer will fight for ur sister's rights. the amt is judge by the court, be it $1, $1k or $10k.

 

[aladin]

Thanks sunshineG and fab_fat

My sister received a call that the lawyer has called the other lawyer to seek for mediation.

Maybe its negotiation of terms i suppose.

 

[fab_mum]

hope all goes well for ur sis.
infidelity is aldy hard to cope. moreover kids are involved.
the least one can do is the minimise the neg effects & get a reliable lawyer.

 

[pizza123]

Any1 have any idea whether a mother is guaranteed care n control of very young infant? I'm a housewife n he is a professional. Is there such thing as split care n control?

 

[miorei]

pizzagal,

u may wish to consult legal aid or visit the nearest family service centre to find out more.

 

[marjassg]

pizzagal, normally no split care and control as it will confuse the child

 

[whiteclover]

i gone thru two mediation sessions. no result. ended up now in the pre-trial conference & waiting for hearing date. Let the judge decides lor... since both parties cannot compromise

And you mentioned the kid is 10 yrs old, to my understanding and what i read fm articles relating to custody care and control, the child's wishes can be heard and granted so long the mother is "normal" (no drug addiction, gambler, etc).

Sad to hear that alot of women... hving the same fate like me. But i do hope there is justice and judge will grant all bbs to natural mothers who are willing to care for the child. (of cos not for abusive mother or father)

Surrogate mothers cannot never replaced the natural mothers...

 

[health]

Dear Friends,

I am not really going thru Divorce yet but really wanted to go ahead with it...
My story is quite confusing so perhaps i leave it to another day...

Why i am here is i really need sound advice regarding custody.
I hv a note hinting my wife do not want the custody of the kids, can i use this note as evidence to get full custody ?

Below are the EXACT words from the note -

"i hope tat u can think over wat i had mentioned earlier, about the separation/divorce letter. i hope we can settle things nicely. i do not wish to let this thing turn out ugly, so to benefit the kids. <u>as for the kids, i m willing to let u have them, since u wan them. but i will greatly appreciate if u could let me visit them often and bring them over to my place once a week, maybe overnight. </u>Well, I strongly believe u can take care of them so much better dan i do, esp i hav a very bad temper.

I also strongly believe, by signing the letter will benefit us and will be much much better for us to face each other again."

So friends, do you think i can get custody based on the bold and underlined statement ?

 

[penguins4u]

Seriously speaking, I dun think this sentence would help you in your case. Did you record them using phone recorder? cos it's going to be your words against hers.
Best is consult a lawyer.

 

[extremepower]

Of course mediation is a good initial choice. haiz.

 

[foliage]

Singapore women's charter generally protects the ladies. If your to-be-ex wife does not want custody of the child, I believe you dun hav to fight for it. However, first priority will always be given to mum for kids under 10. In your case, it seems that joint custody will be the best option. However, its best to consult lawyer before any negotiation to know your respective rights. Even if the kids may be awarded to you or held in joing custody, u may still need to pay her monthly alimony.

 

[froggie12]

Wellness,

In this case, you wife is asking for a join custody (in which the kids will be with you and she will only visit only during weekends).

You have to prove that the note is written by your wife and that it is not written under threat. If not, it is completely useless...cos she can suddenly want the custody and tells the court that you threaten her with it.

Best is both sign a written note, get friends to sign as witness and this will be accepted by the court that she does not wants the custody. This is helpful if she suddenly want their custody.

However, best is get the lawyer to draft and sign it infront of the lawyer.

Hope this helps.