Dear ladies,
I just want to share my story so that I can encourage and spur anyone on on this long and arduous IVF journey.
It actually took hubby and I 6 gynaes before we could BFP.
After all the gynae-hopping and spending countless sum of money, we finally landed up at CARE.
How I chanced upon CARE was I believe, a sheer blessing from God.
One day while channel surfing, I saw a show which featured Pierre Png. In that show he was infertile and he walked out from CARE despondently after the gynae told him about his inability to father children.
Subsequently, CARE was the lab which enhanced my hubby’s sperm during our last failed SO-IUI. Boy I must add, my SO-IUI cost me an exorbitant $4k… it however ended in a failure.
After 12 months of hoping, prayer and copious tears, we finally found out hubby’s serious sperm issue. He has low sperm count with only 1% normal forms and borderline motility. This means his chance of fathering a child is significantly lower than a normal couple, who has 25% of a chance to conceive per month.
When I met Angela, she spent almost 2 hours going thru the details with us.
She urged us to try SO-IUI again but we refused. We were very adamant as we were sick and tired of waiting in anticipation and in nothing.
On the same evening, I was started on Gynera, a birth control pill. This was the first step to the whole IVF journey.
If not for this forum, I would not have found out how dedicated CARE is.
The support from all you sisters was invaluable. Even though we have never met, the camaraderie and support were strong!
The IVF journey was really an onerous path for me.
Every stage I would be worried about something.
Eg: When Angela first scanned me, she suspected I might have endometriosis. Thankfully Dr Paul Tseng said otherwise and even assured me that everything was fine.
Subsequently I was given jabs to suppress and then I was spotting on and off.
At one juncture, I thought I have to cancel the cycle due to my poor response. However, Angela and her staff were always there to respond to my questions, whether if they were via emails or phone calls.
During stimulation, I responded too well to the drugs and was worried my lining was too thick. I remember Pandawife, Gan and Grumpus assuring me numerous time that the measurement was ok. I still remember sitting at Starbucks in a daze, imagining how the cycle has to be abandoned due to my over response.
The fear continued from ER to ET. I was a potential OHSS candidate with 33 eggs harvested. I have to be put on albumin drip immediately after my ER as I was very bloated. I recall not being to sleep, walk or eat post ER as I was swollen like a huge balloon.
Post ET, I was put on albumin drip again. Albeit having transferred 3 grade one embies, my mind was plagued with fear of failure and anxiety. The same day I had diarrhoea. It continued for about 4 days after ET.
During my 2ww, if you could read from my previous posts, I became one hypochondriac… as if the journey was not stressful enough, I imagined failure as the results of this IVF.
I was obsessed with bloating/ non-bloating and believe me, I was not the best company to be with as I was pretty sullen and miserable.
I overly scrutinized my body for signs and symptoms and cried myself to sleep fearing how I would “fail” the eventual blood test.
Through out this perilous path, my hubby, my aunt, Angela and Ning from CARE and you ladies have been my wonderful support. Especial thanks to Karen who delivered Immunocal to my place and we bonded over short chats, Pandawife and NM’s countless messages, Grumpus’ timely reminders, hoping and iloveshoes and ineedmiracle’s funny posts!
God has been merciful and gracious too.
I never believe I would see a positive sign on a pregnancy kit after 3.5 years of marriage, but I just want to say, miracles do happen.
I prayed for a while to seek God’s agreement and discernment to embark on this journey, as IVF was something being frowned upon by my church.
I concluded that God and Science work together for one purpose – to heal and to treat.
I hope it will be an exciting journey for me and for all who choose this.
I believe, somehow, we will be rewarded. In God’s time we will all be mommies.
Thank you my dear sisters for being with me.
You are the greatest!
(ps: Sorry for the super long post!)
