What's wrong with having Daughter/s?

Hi ladies,

came to know a website that actually help couples to determine what sex they want for their baby.


http://cute1008.genderpred.hop.*********.net/?tid=860

Try this website. It free

My friend tried and she says quite accurate.
She is now 7mths pregnant and she is expecting a boy, just as she wish.

go on and try it.
 


I have a baby girl. My in laws wanted a baby boy. So did my parents. Personally I didn't really care as I wasn't so keen on a baby to begin with. However after the little brat was born they grow on you like a weed in a garden. Nowdays I'm ok. I'm more worried when she grows up. I hope she meets nice people esp when it comes to boys. Being a guy I know what mischief we can get into. I think i might send my girl to a nunnery. Esp after reading a lot of the messages on this message board. I'm a guy and even I get depressed with some of your stories. It's really depressing.
 
There are people out there who, for some reasons like genetic diseases, would not and prefer not to have a son.

I do not understand some species of humans that could actually say things like "You must have done something 'bad' to conceive a daughter".

What is the problem with having a girl anyways? All choose to have boys then wait for some smart alec scientist to invent something to make guys conceive? Using whose egg then?

China and India have high rates of female infanticide. A few more years down the road, they will also face population shortage. So the smart alec scientist got to emerge soon.

All in all, humans still come out from a woman, to put in crudely.
 
hi all

my first born is a gal too n i'm v happy to have her. deep down, i noe my MIL n hb wld love to have a boy. anyways, i agree with Maple Babies's view. girls are and can be even more capable than boys.:) if i have another bb, i do hope she's a gal. :p for nw, 1 is gd enuff for me.
 
i have two girls and everyone in the family just love them to pieces, be it from my side or the husband's .. what i don't understand is how some colleagues and friends of mine can tell me to try again, maybe can get a boy the third time round .. first of all, i'm not this procreation machine who's sole purpose is to make babies, secondly if i did try again and don't get a boy, does that mean i have to repeatedly try and try again until i get one - who's going to bear the expenses for upkeep of the kids?

some people only know how to talk .. i listen in one ear, out the other
happy.gif
 
cuclainne,

answer is yes. My auntie had 6 daughters and finally they got a little boy on the 7th. So i would classify her as a pro creation machine.

If life was fair, we would all not work and live in penthouses and drive ferraris. Unfortunately life is not fair. In most families they want to see at least 1 boy.
 
but it's not my family or my husband's family who is asking for a boy leh .. it's others which is why make me angry, girl not good enough apparently .. argh!
 
If everybody in the whole world wants a son, then very soon we will be extinct. lol

I don't understand the logic behind those comments. Maybe its because they want a girl but got a boy?
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i think its very old fashioned thinking to want a boy more than a girl. its just a very silly carry on the family name nonsense.

these days, opportunity is given to girls to excel in our society. in fact, if you have a daughter you gain a son-in-law. in the end, daughters normally end up coming back to look after the parents. if you have son, be prepared to let him go. i've seen it in many families.

thank goodness my parents are the modern type. my cousin's not so lucky. her mom still keep saying that a boy can survive better in desperate situations - i always remind her that the research shows that that women are the survivors and they can live longer in difficult situations. men check-out earlier.

i have 1 girl (elder) & 1 boy. i really don't mind all girls :p but this way i have no stress from in-laws.
 
This is a interesting topic. To share my story. I am on the other hand always been teased by having 2 boys. My MIL always says "girls are better, bla, bla.." And i always reply to her that I love my boys with all my heart and never thought of having a girl for a moment. Many of my friends are all having boys. Some of them are craving to conceive a girl. Hahahaha.. one of my friend already have 3 boys and is now trying for 4th one. She says she will not stop until she get a GIRL.
 
Although my in-laws seem not to mind but when ppl ask they would respond in a very shy mannners that their grandchildren are girls.

Hey what is wrong ... with out girls around how to give birth to him.
 
I was being curious & 'naughty' so i asked my mama & papa, and they prefer girls.. hahaa...

but ultimately, their priority is bb is in good health..
 
Healthy and happy bb is most important, not the gender!

While many moms in the forum say that PILs give them pressure, sometimes I find the bias has rubbed off on them to the point that they discriminate against their own daughters.

I was at a cafe some months ago and a mom at the next table (1 son and 1 daughter) asked if mine was a boy. I said yes. And then she said, in front of her 6-yearold daughter, "Mine is also a boy" (referring to her 2 year old).

I was quite confounded by her remark and felt sorry for the girl as she was clearly trying to get her mother's attention by trying to sit with her.

I sincerely hope all moms not to repeat the mistakes of the generations before by treating your own daughters as though they are 2nd rate. we are females ourselves and shouldn't inflict the same double standards we accuse the older generation of.
 
Having girls are good for the mommy but not for the daddy ba! hahahaa.. Cuz u noe la, the surname thing...

I had prefer gals all the while. Cuz even if they married off still got mommy (provided that we did treat her well since young !!)

I am not so of the surname thing except if that family needs heir for their big companies as not to let the fruit of labour go to other surnames!

Well, I guess i'm into a very materialistic thoughts here!
 
I can understand if you have a big business consortium and need males to succeed and prolong the tree. But in this century where takeovers, quick sales and talented staff are everywhere, a company needs more than just same-surname males to survive.

Unless, of course, some are hoping can claim 'more' shares by contributing more grandsons to their PIL... I really feel scared thinking of how early some children are introduced to domestic politics.

I say again, kids should have their best (and most) fun from birth till 4 years old!!! Truly hope parents spare their kids from adults' stress and politics.
 
What's wrong with having girls? I have 2 gals, 3yrs and 4.5yrs. I always wanted a gal...when i know my #1 was a gal, i was so happy...i imaging she is Miss Singapore (yes, i did), intelligent and have a HB that will call me mummy also. But too bad, my #1 came with special needs, i was so sad. We tried for #2...i was so happy when the gynae told me was a gal (although hb a bit disappointed, but he is ok with it). Although i don't give a high expectation for my #2, but now she is cute and intelligent.

As for my FIL...think he is totally disappointed...cos his girlfriend's grandson was delivered 2days before my #2, he went hospital visit them but not me, he pay everything and celebrate the grandson 1st month but not for my daughter...anyway i don't give a damn...my gals belongs to me and my Hb not him.
 
Yalor, what's wrong with having girls? I always wanted a girl. When my gynae told me that I would be having a boy, I almost wanted to cry! I was that disappointed lor...

But I try to curb myself since then as I dont want my boy to think I dont like him. He is probably the greatest achievement I will ever have.
 
There is indeed a stigma if you have all girls.

If you already have 1 girl & the 2nd one is a boy, the response will be immediately congrats congrats.. if the 2nd one is a girl, the response will be - oh congrats, you can try for a 3rd one for a boy..

its really.. hmm

I have 3 daughters - so you can imagine the amt of pathetic looks I get from relatives, friends & they keep telling me to try for a 4th one which will surely be a boy..

Ya, when I have the 1st and 2nd one which looks like boys when they re babies, all the aunties, ah ma commented ya, the next one surely boy.. even doctors cant guarantee - .... speechless....
 
Fir Ave: It's sad that in the 21st century, people can still be so thoughtless in comments (and not care for how the post-natal mother feels)! People who ask others to keep trying for boys are perverse I suspect. Keep your head high and don't let those strange looks bother you. What matters is that you love your kids and do your best as a mother/wife
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nwsaday it is better to hv gal than boy lor....olden days people prefer boy coz boy carry down the surname/bloodline and are supposed to take care of the parent when he is old.

but in these days, it seems tat most of the time it is the daughter taking care of the parents than sons lor. juz tink this way, when a couple patoring, the bf will buy supper for the gf family de rite but hardly the other way round ma....

then also abt carrying the surname/bloodline, surname yes lor...but bloodline nt necessary lor..coz my son follow my blood group instead of hb one lor....hahaha...tat y i keep teasing hb tat my son shld follow my surname le....

and actually both me and hb prefer gal lor...

Fir Ave, i noe wat u mean....and the other way round which i encounter wen people noe i carrying boy last time, their reaction is like wow, then some even comment "wow, u beri li hai, 1st one already boy" and i was like Y lor...muahaha
 
Hi Diana,

Me too! People said I could ‘take it easy le’ since my first pregnancy was a boy. I was like “what nonsense u talking!?”…

My mum used to say this – having a girl is like having an expansion pack – some day, you will get an additional son (i.e. son in law). But having boys will be the opposite – some day, your boy will ‘disappear’ (cos busy with gf liao mah)… How true… But I think to a certain extend, it also depend on the girl. Like my sister in law (Brother’s wife), she is very close to my family and in a way, it shaped my brother’s ‘behaviour’. I mean, she helps to influence my brother to also focus on his parents, instead of just her parents.
 
Not only the older generation is 'son-crazy', even younger generation like us is. I remebered that my male colleague gave a big congrats to my another colleague whose wife was carrying a son. When I said I was carrying a girl, he didn't give me such a big congrats lor!

I personally prefer a boy so that hb can be the one entertaining him, bring him to toilet etc. Haha. Also, like what Samantha said, 1st one son can take it easy liao and can stop at one. Now ppl keeps asking when I want a 2nd one to try for a 'hao' (good) word in Chinese. So irritating! Heh!
 
jiayi
i thought these days older generation seems to acknowledge girls are "better" than "boys" ie they are the ones whom will take care of old folks but boys will side with wifes?
 
Hi banquez_suez,

My in laws are okie with either boy or girl. Ironically, it's some of my male colleagues who r in their 30s who die die wants a boy. I guess it depends on each family's background. Their parents prob want grandsons.

Generally, most of my friends prefer girls.
 
hi all,

when i expecting twin (both girls) got a friend told me dun be upset... and tell me to take it easy with this double blown. As she expecting a boy....can't believe someone i am so close and helping her can say such a thing and behave like a coldblood person.......
 
Fir Ave,
I totally understand how u feel!!! I have 3 girls 1, 4 and 6. With 3 dd and no maid, i do not bother to dress up very much, so in a way look younger than my age. I often get stares when out bcos pple think that me & hubby must be some young, brainless couple who dunno how to think and plan and stuck with 3 kids.
Some will cast a symnpathetic look, others will break out a forced smile and say, "wa, so young 3 kids already. Govt sure like u"
Those who knows me, will tell me to try for a 4th one.
Now me and hubby are house hunting for a place near a primary school of our choice. I really cannot tolerate it when owners/agents give u the , "are u sure u can afford it look."
Apologies if i am ranitng out of topic.
 
well there are alway such idiots at every corner of the world, no point getting upset wif such people de....

when they are old and their son hv no time for them while your gals are accompanying you to shopping etc then they will know lor...
 
hi..Yes they r idiots..
my mil even said, 1st bb HAVE to be BOY and the rest just give birth to gal or boy as I LIKE! then my sil adds on.. Yes, mummy will give u $$ if u give birth to BOY!!
Wat kind of world is this?? treat us DIL as give birth machine??? duno they know that we cant decide on the sex of bb, its THEIR SON in control!!
 
poogle,

how ur r/s wif ur in laws? can u jokingly reply them by telling your hb infront of them saying, "dear, u hear it hor, u muz jia you coz the gender is control by you not me....
 
diana,
r/s.... v normal.. no special things to talk abt.. I already tired of talking this topic w them.. now everything my hubby will ans them, i just :X.
 
Mum In Law say 1st MUST be a boy or all boys...

My Hubby and his brother also want girl so MIL say my hubby is the eldest cannot give birth to girls only must have boys...

Girl is usless never carry surname of the family... I was like so upset at her comments...

My husband like Girl but to us boy or girl we also like... Still our kids mah.... Even both are Girls I also like

Girls have parents in their heart even after they get married... Boys will not return to their parents' house to visit them only follow wife nia...
 
Diana,

Tell ur in law tat hving boy or gals is in god will and in ur hb control....

anyway, dun nid to care, as long as u hv ur hb support can le....
 
So long never come into this thread.

So annoying when people tell us to try for boys. If we want another child, it's because we want another child. Not because wanna try for boy lor. I delivered a boy in Oct last year and people tell us we "bo tio liao" (my elder 2 are girls)!! Aiyoh!!!!!! Cant stand it!!

Even if 3rd one is a boy, it doesnt mean my girls mean any lesser to me. They are still the darlings who hubby and myself dote so much. Thankfully, hubby is always very supportive and is fine with either gender. Both of us just hope the kids will be healthy and happy.
 
Jaslyn, wah, your friend is so insensitive! What double blow? Machiam 1 girl is sad enough, now double sad is it? Duh!!!

Double happiness cannot meh?

Honestly, I feel angry hearing such comments. A child is a blessing and we as parents will be happy to conceive. Nothing sad about it, so there's really no "blow". All we want is just for our child to be healthy.
 
I'm the lucky one. I have 3 girls, neither my MIL or my hubby's grandma said anything in front of me. I did received comments from other relatives or aunties on the streets, but comments from these pp won't bother me.
I have wanted a boy initially thus try for the third one, coz' my hubby's the only son and only grandson!! also, a boy can help to carry heavy things!:p But i'm very contented with my 3 gals, for one, i can watch barbie with them. Can't imagine myself watching transformers or ben10???
 
Happen to saw this thread but wondering if still active..

I have 2 princess leh. Expecting #3 now.
Feeling very stress whereby seems like nobody can understand.

Everyone keep asking since they know I am preg. Is this a boy? What if girl how? Friends & relatives are like keep asking and will say they pray for me to be a boy.

I know their good intentions but e feeling is not very good. Girl or boy still my children right. As long healthy most importantly right? All can share their clothings right?

Sometime I felt I am lying to myself on these. I do hope for a boy no doubt I am not super traditional BUT just wanted a difference. THough hubby say girl never mind BUT I can see from his face.. he hoping for a boy.

Now I am only 14weeks.. still ages to see if boy or girl. Somehow felt its a girl... mother sense is the most accurate right...
 
tell yourself that so long as they are healthy, the rest are secondary...hope u will feel better!
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i think u rather have 2 girls than 2 boys right? i have 2 girls btw.
 
when i was pregnant with my first child, on the day before i went for my 20th mth detailed scan, my father-in-law said this "give us good news ok?", i was completely shocked!!! I mean,isnt being pregnant good news enough??? I know what he meant...he wanted a boy as his first grandchild. I was indeed very stressed during the scan. Turned out my baby is a GIRL!!

There's NOTHING WRONG with having girls. But being asians and maybe traditional,we no doubt would like to have a boy too at least. I felt exactly that way too. It's like the pressure would be off once we hv a boy.

A friend of mine has a girl, her only child. When she was pregnant, her husband told her the baby had better be a girl. And he went on further to say if the baby is a girl, she will get whatever she desires after birth!! Her husband simply adores girls!! Nice!
 
hi, i'm also mom to 2 gers, when i tell ppl this, usually they will tell me to try another boy for my 3rd pregnancy. I would love to have a 3rd bb but the problem is we have no one to help take care the bb & i don't wish to leave the bb under maid's care. Also with the kind of attitude of most ppl out there, they will give me those pity look if i were to be pregnant with a 3rd bb ger. Usually those already with 2 gers, 3rd one will be ger too , isn't it ?
 
hi luckibaby

i see alot of couples with 1st two of the same gender, wif the 3rd a different gender.

but i really think people will envy those with girls, hee.

i have 2 girls too.
 
hi luckibaby,

i tried but no luck coz i have endometrosis. which is why i feel that my children are very precious and would like more.

whose looking after your children now?
 
hi luckibaby, mine are 4 and 2.

u mentioned u didnt want your bb to be taken care by maid. but last time, who looked after your girls?
 

Hi Luckibaby,,

The 3rd child may not necessary be the same gender. I hv 2 girls and my 3rd is a boy. My elder girls are super close, they play and do almost everything together. For instance, if one doesnt want to stay over at my mum's place for a nite during sch hols, the other will not too! They hv a 2 yr age gap, by the way. I love those sisterly feeling. I never had a sister and did wish how nice if I had one.
 
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