sorry4kids
Member
Hi all, here is my story to share with u all... Need advice...
my husband is 12 years older than me, im with 3 kids 6,,4 and 9mths.
He's a drunkard, he cant live without beer,he drinks,gamble and smoke. He take his salary daily(Taxi driver). If he ok (meaning he don't drink) he'll give me allowances(daily) if he's drink with his friends, i wont get any.(cause he love paying for other).
During my maternity leave, he gamble on world cup and lost alot of money and borrowed from 3 loanshark and 5 legal moneylender and the worst is that i was force to take a 4k loan. Which i havent even clear till nw. Monthly at $360. Right after borrowing he told me,im testing u to see if u'll help me if im in trouble and say if i win tonight, i'll pay u back 1 shot which he did not as he lost even more.He was in more than 10k debt. That night he go bersak after he lost, i was been harrased to sell the house which i cant as its less than 5 years. when i refuse to sign anything (he told me to sign something to sort of sell the house once it reach 5years). He chased me, tenant, kids and helper out of the house. Stayed at my mum in law house temp. When he finally cool dw abit, we moved back hm but after i still refused to sign the house, he blew his top and threw a beer btl at the living room, my sis in law then called the police. Police and ambulance came as they thought im hurt. I moved out again but to my bro in law place this time round. Manage to move back after 2 weeks after my bro in law helped him clear some of the debts.Im financially very tight as im paying for the maid,insurance and all the kids expenses (childcare,milk powder,diaper,meals,insurance etcs...)I take back around 1.3k only monthly after cpf.His taxi has been towed back so many times by different company as he don't pay his rental.
To him, if he have $ he give me if not let it be... but i cant handle this anymore...recently he got very drunk and got himself into big trouble again,accident. Again, no taxi, no $... Need advise, i noe divorce is what everybody will suggest. But i need to know more. Will i get my kids for sure? House? If i don't get the house, where m i suppose to stay with my kids? 2011 dec then will reach 5yrs for my hdb flat. cause if i sell b4 5 years, hdb will take back the house. i went to legal aid but not approve.I mean if i divorce him nw b4 dec 2011, will hdb take back my flat? Or only after divorce is finalise (meaning court approve) then hdb flat issue will be discuss?
Btw, i kept pestering him to pay the loan, he can even say u got no prove.Luckily i got keep all the msg... i got PPO and maintences is at $1.5 per mth. However he didnt pay, everytime he got drunk he will bang real hard at my door(we sleep in different room). He even say he'll declare he don't work if i bring him to court re: maintences issue. Isnt it unfair for women if guys can just claim they don't work??? Im at my dead end nw, no saving yet got to pay for maid as she look after my baby when im at work. I just need him to be out of my life then at least i can still rent 1 more room out. He insisted in sleeping in another room as he says baby will disturb his sleep as he need attention to drive... If he get out of my life with no chances in my life i will be so relief...
my husband is 12 years older than me, im with 3 kids 6,,4 and 9mths.
He's a drunkard, he cant live without beer,he drinks,gamble and smoke. He take his salary daily(Taxi driver). If he ok (meaning he don't drink) he'll give me allowances(daily) if he's drink with his friends, i wont get any.(cause he love paying for other).
During my maternity leave, he gamble on world cup and lost alot of money and borrowed from 3 loanshark and 5 legal moneylender and the worst is that i was force to take a 4k loan. Which i havent even clear till nw. Monthly at $360. Right after borrowing he told me,im testing u to see if u'll help me if im in trouble and say if i win tonight, i'll pay u back 1 shot which he did not as he lost even more.He was in more than 10k debt. That night he go bersak after he lost, i was been harrased to sell the house which i cant as its less than 5 years. when i refuse to sign anything (he told me to sign something to sort of sell the house once it reach 5years). He chased me, tenant, kids and helper out of the house. Stayed at my mum in law house temp. When he finally cool dw abit, we moved back hm but after i still refused to sign the house, he blew his top and threw a beer btl at the living room, my sis in law then called the police. Police and ambulance came as they thought im hurt. I moved out again but to my bro in law place this time round. Manage to move back after 2 weeks after my bro in law helped him clear some of the debts.Im financially very tight as im paying for the maid,insurance and all the kids expenses (childcare,milk powder,diaper,meals,insurance etcs...)I take back around 1.3k only monthly after cpf.His taxi has been towed back so many times by different company as he don't pay his rental.
To him, if he have $ he give me if not let it be... but i cant handle this anymore...recently he got very drunk and got himself into big trouble again,accident. Again, no taxi, no $... Need advise, i noe divorce is what everybody will suggest. But i need to know more. Will i get my kids for sure? House? If i don't get the house, where m i suppose to stay with my kids? 2011 dec then will reach 5yrs for my hdb flat. cause if i sell b4 5 years, hdb will take back the house. i went to legal aid but not approve.I mean if i divorce him nw b4 dec 2011, will hdb take back my flat? Or only after divorce is finalise (meaning court approve) then hdb flat issue will be discuss?
Btw, i kept pestering him to pay the loan, he can even say u got no prove.Luckily i got keep all the msg... i got PPO and maintences is at $1.5 per mth. However he didnt pay, everytime he got drunk he will bang real hard at my door(we sleep in different room). He even say he'll declare he don't work if i bring him to court re: maintences issue. Isnt it unfair for women if guys can just claim they don't work??? Im at my dead end nw, no saving yet got to pay for maid as she look after my baby when im at work. I just need him to be out of my life then at least i can still rent 1 more room out. He insisted in sleeping in another room as he says baby will disturb his sleep as he need attention to drive... If he get out of my life with no chances in my life i will be so relief...