Sending maid back - Pls Help

[sankan]

Hi

I have a filipino maid. Her work was ok so i renewed her but her phone is getting out of control. She is all the time on the phone an's for 2 -3 hrs at a stretch. Night she will be on the phone from 10 till very late at night but sometimes even till 1 am. And her loud giggling and all that is really really annoying me. Also another big problem is that for anything and everything she will ans back. She thinks she is equal to me. Cant question her regarding work, if i ask her to cut back her phone she will shout at me like anything. I am really had more than enough of her. For anything and everything she will shout at me and demand that i transfer her out. I treat her very very nicely. she has 4 meals a day all i ask her to do is reduce the phone. Which she cant do and she will immideatly ans back. What is the MOM rule? Can we refuse to sign the transfer papers. We told her u go back home as we dont want to transfer u.She says lets see if i will go into the immigration or not. she is getting only 400$ plus 2 off right now.(And this was what she asked me and we gave her and also told her we will give u a bonus if she finish her contract) I think her plan is to just get out of my house and she thinks she will get a good salary.. But for me its like using me. And for what asking her to talk less on the phone..

Anyone in my similar situation where the maid refuses to go back? What can we do? IF i get the ticket and then she refuses to go inside then? We are very clear on one thing, we wont sign the transfer paper..

Thanks a lot for ur help

 

[chaye]

Hi Sankan
You got this maid from an agent ? You can actually go back to the agent and ask for her advice on how to go about doing it by sending her back directly to Philippines instead of letting her do a transfer ! Your maid is obviously doing it on purpose to make you angry and letting her go.

Nowadays the maids are very clever. They post themselves that they are available for transfer on the internet websites. Some expat who needs maid urgently they will go for these maids and they are paid better.

 

[sankan]

HI Chaye

Thanks for your reply. When I tried her, we didnt use the agents help. Anyway the firt time around the agent was pretty useless and we realised that they are only interested in trying to get money either from you or the maid.

Now a days the maids know that we are at the receiving end. Can u imagine my maid has a FB and has over 300 friends.. They know all the rules and they also knw that all MOM rule are favourable to them. Haiyzz

Still trying to figure out what is to be done..

 

[chaye]

Hi Sankan

I just checked with my friends. You can actually login to MOM website and cancel her work permit from there. Buy her a 1 way ticket back to Phil and only inform her on the day of her departure day to ask her pack her things and head for airport. That's how my friends treat those irresponsible maids.

My maid has a FB account too ! I can see from her FB when and what time she login to udpate her status. They can easily get a prepaid 3G sim card and login to FB using hp easily.

I am also looking for a transfer maid as my maid's contract is ending in sept. I have also, from the internet, saw a few maids asking for transfer and when I text them they are able to reply me almost immediately. One even ask me to switch to watsapp so that she can fwd me her fotos ! They are very advance nowadays !

 

[mysticwife]

Hi Sankan, go and check with MOM on what you can do..Don't let your maid bully you for nothing. This is one shit in the field. You can not rely on Maid Agency as well as most of them is aiming on what they can earn from employer and the maid.

 

[sankan]

Chaye - I know we can cancel the WP and do all that but what if at the last moment she refuses to go.. THe moment i tell her u ve to pack and leave in 5 mts she will call 100 difft people and then that. She has told me on my face when she asked me i want to transfer i told her no u go back she said No i dont want to go. I told her by MOM rule we can cancel u and send u back she said 'let me see how u will make me go, let me see if u succeed to get me to immigration". That is scary right. She has more friends in singapore than i had in my entire life and she knows all the rules..
I wanted to call MOM and ask them the rule but scared they will black list me or say that i ve no choice but to transfer..There are no rules for yapping on phone, boyfriends (bigamy as u already have a hus) and back answering. Are there?

Coffee -I dont have an agency cos when i renewed i just renewed her directly (Agency is only interested in money and they dont help u at all atleast mine was not even interested in counselling her when she had boy friend issues sometime back. They were like u change her. Change means money, effort to retrain etc etc). She said she will behave etc etc so we renewed her. And in just a mth, all promises collapsed..

 

[whitewindy]

Hi,

Think you can make a trip to the police station / philippines embassy to escort them back to philippines by force if she wants to end it in an ugly way. Can check first before proceeding.

 

[whitewindy]

Try to record down what she says to u.

In case she report u abuse her or what.

We never know these maid will do what to us.

She is threatening u and please do not transfer her as she might cause other employers a big headache.

Dunno if u can sue her since she is threatening u.

 

[chaye]

U can also apply to MOM to blacklist this maid.

Perhaps you may also want to share with the mummies here what's your maids name so that they will be weary of this maid.

 

[sankan]

Thank you guys.. Will call up the respective people to see what needs to be done. Anyways she has been behaving little better for the last few days (phone is still there but limited to an and night). This gives me some time to decide what shld be my course of action.

I cant blacklist a maid for ans back or talking on the phone(My hus asked me to voice record her ans back so we ve proof but so far i always forget).

 

[tempo4me]

Sankan,

I think that is the difference between filipino maids and indonesian maids. But nowadays indonesian maids are also getting smarter.

May I know any outcome of the situation? I would like to know more.

 

[twinnybabes]

Hi Sankan,

I have a few experiences on hiring maids as I have small kids and both me and my husband are working. Maids now are really not concerned with the quality of work that they do but rather on their personal agenda such as using the phone (all the imaginable tricks just so they can sneak and use the hp!), having fb account (i don't even have one!), playing dumb & ignorant when during the interview, they will claim they know how to do things.

Just last May, we have decided to send back our maid to the Philippines as we found out that she's been doing some unacceptable things. We bought the ticket, asked her to pack her bags that day and accompany her to the airport.

I think in your case, you can buy 1 one-way ticket, go to a police post (don't let her know you're doing this) & talk to a police and tell them you're sending a maid back home but you are concerned that she could turn violent or hysterical and might try to run away so ask the police if they can escort her till she pass by immigration.

Have at least 1 or 2 recorded conversation of you & your maid answering back to you that you can't send her home & refuse to go to airport etc...so you can show the police that she can be harsh.

I have since replaced my maid but the next 2 maids are also terrible, 1 with psychologiacal problems, and the current is also a hp addict (in fact, she prioritizes her handphone more than her duties), fb addict and talks back when I point out something that she's not doing properly... I am now again, for the 3rd time in the process of changing maids.
What a headache!

Goodluck! Send her home asap!

Btw, I'm a Filipino and I can't seem to understand why even though we're from same country, some of the Filipino maids behave that way.. they seem to be more interested on personal things rather than earning money for their families as what they will initially tell you during the interview. No matter how good you treat them, make them comfortable inside the house, they usually eat more than we do, they still doesn't know how to show appreciation. End of the day, employers suffer the hassle of dealing how to get rid of them plus the $$ involved in replacing them..

 

[pooja]

Hi There,

i got a horrible maid last time.So we just booked her 1 way tix without telling her.Then we cancelled her WP.On the day of her departure we informed her to pack her bags 2hrs before the checkin time.She created troubles again and asked us to call police as she talked with some agencies and told that she dont want to go.

Later we did call police and she was not moving and we had her flight in next few hours. we recorded everything in CCTV. After the police came in saw the special pass just ending on that day with tix. they adviced her to wind up her things but she was pleading them that she wants to stay back,They told her ITS EMPLOYERS CHOICE AND NO ONE CAN DO ANYTING.
Then she packed up.Dont hand oer her due salary and passport and tix till the immigration.Record when you give and take signature.Police said to us that not to agitate the maid or provoke by saying any nasty thing which will make her run away......

Police didnt come along they just came and warned and left.At airport we asked the staff their that she is not cooperating and they told her sternly to behave and we did early check in for her.

It was very stressful process but we were relieved to send her back.

 

[sorry4kids]

Hi twinny, I'm also having some issue with my Phil maid.
We treat them as one of us, sharing whatever we have and even buy her a set of tv so that she can watch after work. But seems they do not cherish or appreciate what they have. I have Phil colleagues and I respected them. Seems like we really have to treat maid as lower class ...

 

[twinnybabes]

Hi sorry4kids & other mums,

I'm actually working night shifts since the transfer maid joined us (the hp addict). That was exactly 2 months ago and until now she is so dependent on my mom, from cleaning the house to cooking to washing and to almost every house work you can think of! My mom can only do so much as I have a 7 month old baby. Of course if this is the case everyday, my mom would be left with no choice but to do most of the maid's duties because she feels that a lot of time is wasted from teaching someone who is not even willing to learn!

As for me, after my shift is over at 8am, I get home by 9am and still has to wait till 11am to pick up my kids from school (as I don't think I can trust her to do this based on her work attitude). I can only take a few hours sleep then I'd be off to work again by 530pm.

I can understand if she is very loaded, that she claims she's confused (with God know what) but the fact that she doesn't cook, doesn't go to the market (we do this coz the 1 time we asked her, she bought all the almost-spoiled fish, vegetables, etc, doesn't even send off & pick up kids.. how can she not learn even to change quilt cover for goodness sake..really terrible.

She only looks out at my 4 yo twins while they eat
their lunch/dinner, prepare them for school and do a bit of cleaning coz our house doesn't have a lot of furnitures, twice a week washing (using the machine), once a week ironing. And she has the nerve to complain that she gets tired from doing these tasks.

The most frustrating part is, the agency can't give us a replacement as there is no available helper yet for transfer or new. I don't want to wait for a fresh one as it usually takes 2 months processing and I can't wait that long. I just want her out, but I can't do anything at the moment coz I'm working.

Oh I'm so sorry I vented my anger in here

Anyway, goodluck to us. May we find the right "one" and then we can put an end to these horror maid stories

 

[sankan]

My Update- My maid ran away this morning (or shld i say walked out this morning).
Last week We wrote to MOM regarding what to be done with her and they told us that we can send her back. ( we waited for MOM reply cos she kept saying we cant send her back and we were scared MOM also says so. But they were clear, send her back but we wont help u in the repatriation) So yest night my darling hus decided not to ill treat her and gave her a head start by telling her we r sending her back. Told her we will tell u when later. She said ok, as long as it is your money. Story finished.. This morning she asked me for 15$ to buy card as she wants to call her mom and tell her abt her arrival. I told her to talk to my hus. When she approached him, he asked what card is it and that he will get it for her. She got agitated and started shouting and asking for money. My hus said no he will get the card. she immediately threated him saying if u dont give me money i will make ur life miserable.. My hus said do what u want but i wont give u money as it is obvious that u want the money for something else and not to buy the card. She went to kitchen and called or smsed someone then She just went out put on her sandals and walked out. He went behind her to check, she was downstairs on the public phone for a while and then she just walked out.
It been abt 5 hrs now. My hus went to police, they said they will not file a report and asked him to come back at night. Why they wont file a report cos when they called her mobile it was ringing (she didnt pick up) that means she is reachable it seems and hence they wont take a report at this point of time.

Really lost what to be done. BTW, her work permit was cancelled yest night and we have already got ticket for her but she doesnt know this..

Somebody must be helping her as she walked out in rags and just her mobile phone & little bit of money she had with her ( dont knw how much she had).

Unnecessary tension. I told my hus to tell her only the day she was to go but he feared she would run away or give problem like Poojas..

In singapore the maids r allowed to do whatever they want without consequences. We r good to them, they illtreat us and still no body can do a thing. She threatened to make our life difficult and then walked out. We couldnt do a thing...

Anybody encountered this? what is to be done? My hus said he will go back to the police post at night.. Cos the work permit is cancelled she is an illegal here. Unnecessary tension all for 15$. Even if we had given that she may ve used that to run away.. Dont even know what she is thinking..
If ur a run away maid can she be banned from entering singapore??

Sorry for the rambling.. lost as to wht to do..

 

[mommy1009]

This thread comes timely. I am facing the same maid from hell. I do not wish to transfer her as I don't want even my worst enemy to go through the pain of having this maid.

I just want to get the tix, send her to airport and off she goes. She was savvy enough to take refuge in JB before joining my family. I don't even want to save the money and get her across the causeway. I don't want her to cry wolf that I dumped her in Msia instead of getting her air tix for her return.

I am afraid she will turn nasty the moment i tell her i am sending her off. So I am going to tell her only on the very day we are sending her to the airport.

I never knew they could counter threaten us, the employers. I will tape down the conversation with her and ensure sufficient evidence are collected on recording.

Biggest nightmares to working mothers.....

 

[g2006oct]

Yes I'm also facing the same hell from P maid! She spoilt my 8 years iron, fight/argument with my 8yo DD. She told me she doesn't know she can't step on my antique table to reach the window. (She's big, abt 70+kg on 152cm tall). She buys what I use e.g lotion etc. She claimed she has backache, fingers numb,leg n shoulder pain BUT she could squad to tie my girls hair with her painful legs!
She lies, even tell my DD not to tell me she (maid) has spoilt my DD toy's parts. Her true answer is always shown on face (expression) instead from her mouth!

Same as mommy1009, I will send her back (sun) to P via another agent. (I suspect d agent i took her from, betrayed me). I wouldn't want any other families suffer what I had. It's a sin to keep her here....

 

[sophie_79]

i have bad experience with maid too . I had Indonesian maid , i suspect she's mentally unstable. She steal things, money and destroy things (e.g scratch my fridge with a pen knife) . That time she just finshed paying the loan and left a balance of $60 . We send her back to agent , and the agent says she want to charge us lodging fee . I say no way , this maid is crazy i will not pay for that and argued. In the end , the maid agency agree to deduct from the maid remaining salary. after a few months , the maid dad call and sms us , saying that they want to complain and say the maid still have a few thousand salary with us. this is totally insane.

 

[pixie ng]

my parents used to have an Indonesian maid too.. run off one day.. my aunt who live next doorm saw her leaving with a indian man.. so my parents went to report police after she MIA for few hours.. at night, she did return home but we send her back to the agency immediately...

so far our philipines maid is very good... she been taking care of our family since her 20s... then she went back to philipines to marry and have a family.. but after money spend finish, she came back singapore to look for us again.. lucky our previous maids all got problem, so we re-hire her again.. now she already 40s le..

 

[Tang79]

Referring to Sophie's post about the complaint she rx from the problematic maid's father. If anyone encounter or can share what happened after that? Am planning to send back mine but was somehow threaten by maid agency that I will be sue by maid back in Philippines.

 

[Mermaid1972]

Hi,currently i have indo maid.but very stubborn n always ans back.already with us for 4mths.still got outstanding with agency bout 3mths.but i really cant stand with her.can i send her back straight to hometown?i dont want to ryn her back to agency.can anyone help me how the procedure?

 

[Tang79]

Hi,

Sorry to hear that you encountered maid issue.

What I did is to go the terminate the maid's work permit online, then buy air tix, inform her on the day, settle whatever outstanding salary and ask her to sign that there is no other outstanding money matters, then send her to the airport directly and see her walk through the custom.

You can refer to mom website for a better idea.
http://www.mom.gov.sg/passes-and-pe...ic-worker/employers-guide/sending-an-fdw-home

Hope this help!

 

[mummy_nag]

Hi all,
Happen to find this place.

I've got a helper from Myanmar to help take care of my dad who got stroke last Mar.

The thing is she also addicted to hp, will be on the hp whether she at home or out. We didn't limit her for this but she's getting worse. My mum says she was in the hp late at night when after my dad slept.

For days my dad don't go to day care centre, she wakes up late as my dad, leaving my mum to do all the stuffs.

For days my dad go centre, she's supposed to help my mum doing the house work, but today, she just change and follow my dad to centre. She told my mum nothing to do at home!!! Lol!

I think the truth is, she doesn't want to do anything and in centre she doesn't need to!

We've been nice to her and we do not limit her on the meal amount.
During cny, she sits at the table to eat with the old folks where leaving some folks having no seat!!

I'm angry with her deciding to go to wherever she likes. Last week, we told her she can go off on the second day of cny, but she decided to go on Mon, cos she said she want to send money going but that Sunday the place that help them transfer money is closed. So she want to go on Mon.
Would like to send her back cos she's been telling my dad she's going back to get married after 1 yr, and she's just past 6 month.

My worry is, if only inform her to pack and go on the very day and she refused to, she might do something in the car when I'm driving. What should I do? Or should I get a grab??

 

[milogal88]

Hi all,
Happen to find this place.

I've got a helper from Myanmar to help take care of my dad who got stroke last Mar.

The thing is she also addicted to hp, will be on the hp whether she at home or out. We didn't limit her for this but she's getting worse. My mum says she was in the hp late at night when after my dad slept.

For days my dad don't go to day care centre, she wakes up late as my dad, leaving my mum to do all the stuffs.

For days my dad go centre, she's supposed to help my mum doing the house work, but today, she just change and follow my dad to centre. She told my mum nothing to do at home!!! Lol!

I think the truth is, she doesn't want to do anything and in centre she doesn't need to!

We've been nice to her and we do not limit her on the meal amount.
During cny, she sits at the table to eat with the old folks where leaving some folks having no seat!!

I'm angry with her deciding to go to wherever she likes. Last week, we told her she can go off on the second day of cny, but she decided to go on Mon, cos she said she want to send money going but that Sunday the place that help them transfer money is closed. So she want to go on Mon.
Would like to send her back cos she's been telling my dad she's going back to get married after 1 yr, and she's just past 6 month.

My worry is, if only inform her to pack and go on the very day and she refused to, she might do something in the car when I'm driving. What should I do? Or should I get a grab??

You can check with your agent and they can arrange their runner to send her back for a fee. I think it ranges from $80 to $100. Else you can check with other maid agencies (if you do not want to go back to your own agency) if they provide repatriation service.

 

[arsenalgirl]

Hi all,
Happen to find this place.

I've got a helper from Myanmar to help take care of my dad who got stroke last Mar.

The thing is she also addicted to hp, will be on the hp whether she at home or out. We didn't limit her for this but she's getting worse. My mum says she was in the hp late at night when after my dad slept.

For days my dad don't go to day care centre, she wakes up late as my dad, leaving my mum to do all the stuffs.

For days my dad go centre, she's supposed to help my mum doing the house work, but today, she just change and follow my dad to centre. She told my mum nothing to do at home!!! Lol!

I think the truth is, she doesn't want to do anything and in centre she doesn't need to!

We've been nice to her and we do not limit her on the meal amount.
During cny, she sits at the table to eat with the old folks where leaving some folks having no seat!!

I'm angry with her deciding to go to wherever she likes. Last week, we told her she can go off on the second day of cny, but she decided to go on Mon, cos she said she want to send money going but that Sunday the place that help them transfer money is closed. So she want to go on Mon.
Would like to send her back cos she's been telling my dad she's going back to get married after 1 yr, and she's just past 6 month.

My worry is, if only inform her to pack and go on the very day and she refused to, she might do something in the car when I'm driving. What should I do? Or should I get a grab??

Yeah get a runner.....either that or get a Grab and make sure you sit beside her and watch her....
One more piece of advice- no more Myanmmar maids most are not interested to work and here 'princesses' here for an extended holiday....
They also do not behave like helpers....and since you mention she works for your parents- she probably expects them to treat her like their 'kid'....oh well...