I just want to share my experience and lessons learnt months ago.It's a long post but hope it'll help mummies out there[IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]
I worked in a company from Trainee up to an executive employee for 3 years plus.3 months Into the third year, I found out that I was pregnant. I then told my HR after 3 months into the pregnancy because I had just transferred from accounts to MICE department begining of the year and was now taking more MCs due to early pregnancy ailments and doctor's visits and upsetting my new dept head.HR then told my HOD and I was given less workload, cut off all site inspections, and later, under the disguise of unsatisfactory performance, my performance appraisal was bad and my probation was first postponed, then terminated and I got transferred to Security dept to handle admin. My HR director dared me to go to MOM, saying that internal transfer, as long as the nature of the job and benefits are the same, even if you are not agreeable, the law will still be on their side.
During that time, I was very depressed. I wanted very much to resign and I know it will be much better for baby also, as the company is known for this kinda wicked acts and they will not stop giving me a hard time until i resign.i was unwilling to take on the new role they assigned to me as that was not wad i wanted when i joined the company.However, my DH wasn't earning a good pay and we would be super tight if I lose my job.But in the end, i still left.Who knoes wad would have happened if i stayed on. i may have more money to spend, but the un happiness may reflect in the mood of my baby, and be with her for the rest of her life. What if i got over stressed and lost her?Money and baby, i chose baby.
Now, 4 months after her arrival, no paid maternity leave although i worked for a long time before my pregnant days with this company, but I have no regrets.I must say we are indeed very short of money.But without money we can survive. If i lose her then over earning more money, i would definitely regret for life.Money can be made, spend wisely and you'll be ok.You learn prudence along the way and the tough times makes your stick closer together and weather it out!i believe we'll laugh at the memories when our kids are grown ups and we're grey.
But i have this advice for mtbs in this predicament.You can have the cake and eat it too.After you divulge your pregnancy to anyone, prepare yourself mentally to take things easy and place baby over everything else. At the end of the day, you didn't wanted baby for the money, but you wanted money for the baby.get your priorities right. if you dun focus on the job and your expectations in it, then you will not be upset by it, wadever happens.until you are sure the company still treasures you and you can still do your part for the company, just do your best in tasks assigned to you, the lighter the job the better, don't expect wad is initially offered. Go to work happily everyday, until the end, if they terminate you, take a deep breath, make sure you get the termination letter, then pack your things and go.If that is such a company, it's good to know it early so you do not pin your hopes high working in the company.When things turn ugly, just be practical and not emotional or sentimental about anything.if they know feelings, they wouldn't do wad they did.the bottomline now is, you must get the maternity benefits.after you pack your things and leave officially. Ask your HR about the 2 months paid maternity leave.The reason you only bring up after you have officially left is so that they will not eat their words and u-turn their actions in a bid to make that part worth - they might as well use you since they're payign you for it - then you'll be in for a longer time of bearing with their nonsense.at this point, you just need them to deny you maternity benefits. Best is to have the issue documented like email or conversation with time, who said wad and word for word jotted down and witness(people around)you can get a friend or your hubby to follow you to the company.You'll have a use for it when you approach MOM later.no need to let them know.just proceed. if possible to stay on,treat their actions and words like kids, don't take it to heart.After work, forget about everything, go home and hug hubby, go shopping, watch movie and do wadever makes you happy.Later on when bay arrived, no more time for these activities already[IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] it will do you good if you can earn your way to birth of your child.Becos the money will be impt.That is, however, unless you honestly can do it without affecting yourself and baby, getting depressed all day and night over wad they do or say, i left becos i cant. if that's the case, leaving is the best option. You will not regret. My baby girl is easy to look after because she feels happy and secured, just as i was after i resign, albeit living on maggie and bread for 2 meals followed by a proper nutritious and balanced dinner daily throughout my pregnancy. Her temperament is good because without the influence of others and their stupid actions, i can decide whether to be happy or not.She is healthier than most of babies her age- she's more than a 75% baby!You do need quality food so my proper dinner made up for everything needed for the day!Afterall how many meals you eat a day are healthy?sometimes, not even the dinner is nutritious and balanced.The most important part of the human body is the brain - the state of it determines the wellbeing of the other parts.So happiness is the most important food for baby - being loved and support by DH and the excitement of the new arrival is enough to keep me busy and happy!More so if you're expecting a boy!during my pregnan days, i read in a medical journal that estrogen levels can overpower testoterone levels when mummies get too emotional and upset all the time and girls dun produce testosterone, so wad will that do to the baby boy when his testosterone levels diminishes and no replacement for it?He becomes more feminine than he should be!!dun expect things to turn out well if things has started to turn for the worse.Everyday you go back to the company to work is a bonus, an opportunity to exercise and keep fit before you're stuck at home from the point you're out.All in all, be happy, be confident, be prepared, be healthy and all the best to mommy and baby!i'm sure everything's worth it.Afterall, you may not miss working after baby arrived[IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]Trust me*wink!*Safe delivery and take care!!
