Rather than 1 sided, make it an effort from both side. It would be easier as your hub is willing to work on the marriage.
Segregate it into 2 issues.
Issue 1, himself: yes, he has to be very very assuring. In terms of actions, words, etc. He has a good fatherly attitude, etc
Issue 2, you and him: if it's an EMA, he was in pursue of something that he lacked in his relationship w u.
One of the foundation to good marriage is healthy relationship w spouses. You may want to concentrate more on him. If u find it difficult to do so, it might reflect your waning love on him. you may want to do a self check.
As hard as it maybe to be betrayed and stay w the person who betrayed u, since u hv made the choice, giv it a shot.
If u felt short changed over the decision (to stay), then just leave. No issue. The issue here is 'have u tried?'.
Only time will heal. Yes, u hv bn hurt. Hence u will embrace, become stronger and move on.
Learn to love him again. With healthy relationship, everything will fall in place.