In love with a married man

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Confused90

New Member
Hi, I would like to have some clarification here. Hope yall can help me out :’)

Long story short. I just found out not too long ago that current bf is married. (Found our 1 yr after we have been tgt, going to be tgt for 2yrs soon) He told me himself due to some incident between us. Said that he was looking for an appropriate time to tell me, scared of losing me etc. Therefore, he didn't told me.

Apparently he told me he is going through a divorce with his wife. Wife is a PRC. I’m just curious how long does it takes for him to be divorce. Because recently i just found out that he tried to apply PR for her. If they are going through divorce can he still apply PR for her ?

Told me on dec they are going through a divorce. Will finalised probably end of this year which is near. Saw the PR application which was filed on apr.

I know i should be asking him directly about this but i just cant bring myself to it. Would like to know how long does it takes for a divorce to finalise between a Singaporean and PRC. Is he still able to apply PR for her on apr even though he told me they are going through divorce on dec. He told me they do not have kids. I’m not trying to doubt him but i jus need some assurance. Thanks in advance
 


he might be lying to you. if he is applying PR for her, its take quite awhile to be approved.
the authority will also need to call him for interview and he had to declare that they are married.
he is likely lying to you
 
No, she would not be granted PR if they don't remained married as she required a Singaporean sponsor. So, he is likely lying to you and had lied to you for the past 1 year before you discovered his marital status. Given the above that he is capable of lying, you should doubt him.

If he loves you, he should have been upfront with you. If he was capable of real love, he wouldn't cheat on his wife with you.
 
Dear Confused90

In the 1st place why you did not suspect anything tt he is a married man but till 1 yrs later?

It’s not too late to wake up!!!! This asshole is enjoying the best of both world ... dun be silly.

Rubbish!! When is appropriate time to confess to you??!! If he is serious about the relationship with you he would had already proceed the divorce the PRC last yearbut why is he applying PR for her lately???? The answer is very obvious rite??!!

Wake up gal!!! He is cheating on his PRC wife there’s a likelihood that he might cheat on you in the near future

Not forgetting you are a 3rd party who wrecks person marriage. I guess you might be in your 90’s...STOP investing on a cheater...CUT LOST... MOVE ON AT ONCE
 
Confused90 said:
Hi, I would like to have some clarification here. Hope yall can help me out :’)

Long story short. I just found out not too long ago that current bf is married. (Found our 1 yr after we have been tgt, going to be tgt for 2yrs soon) He told me himself due to some incident between us. Said that he was looking for an appropriate time to tell me, scared of losing me etc. Therefore, he didn't told me.

Apparently he told me he is going through a divorce with his wife. Wife is a PRC. I’m just curious how long does it takes for him to be divorce. Because recently i just found out that he tried to apply PR for her. If they are going through divorce can he still apply PR for her ?

Told me on dec they are going through a divorce. Will finalised probably end of this year which is near. Saw the PR application which was filed on apr.

I know i should be asking him directly about this but i just cant bring myself to it. Would like to know how long does it takes for a divorce to finalise between a Singaporean and PRC. Is he still able to apply PR for her on apr even though he told me they are going through divorce on dec. He told me they do not have kids. I’m not trying to doubt him but i jus need some assurance. Thanks in advance
Click to expand...


He is an opportunist. You should query him, point-blank, in the face. You are in the upper hand, hence deserve all queries to be answered.

The point here is he is having the best of both worlds. Your man is sleeping with her the very moment he is not with you. Time to wake up and stay sensible and rational. HE IS MARRIED. your ideal guy is not available for your family to accept him.

'Scared of losing you...".. is a sure catch phase that makes anyone feels everything is worth waiting for... btw the common phases/excuses a married guy keeps his lover by his side are as per you mentioned and more.

as for the application of PR... it can be done at any stage of Dv.

if u think he is the right one for you, push for his Dv. Your youth is wasted unless he is showering you w lots of $$$$... ok fine.., $$$$ can heal/coverup some part. Ultimately wouldn't solve the issue.

btw aft DV, he may end up half-broke.. he may need financial support from you... are you ready to support a person who claims to love you by mouth and not from the heart? reminder: for 12mths, 365days, there isn't a day he chooses to come clean til you find out...

you have 6mths' wait. I suggest u wait it out. Anyway now ccb aso can't go out find another one. stay rational.
 
Hi,

Sorry to thread on this topic.

I'm in a somewhat similar situation, except that when I got together with him, they were already in the process of filing for divorce pre lock-down.

However, due to the lockdown, he told me that the lawyers have put everything on hold as everyone is working from home and priority is given to those who are already in the interim/final stage.

I'm kinda in a dilemma now as they are still living together, although in separate rooms and things are not going anywhere due to the lockdown.

I know I shouldn't get myself involved with a "yet-to-be" divorced man but things happened and emotions have been invested.

I'm just not sure how long I should wait out there and staying rational during this period is becoming a challenge.
 
Nah lovefoot case seems more reasonable. So when you say your married lover going through the process of filing for divorce, you mean is uncontested divorce? or already seperated long enough ?
 
axioms said:
Nah lovefoot case seems more reasonable. So when you say your married lover going through the process of filing for divorce, you mean is uncontested divorce? or already seperated long enough ?
Click to expand...
It is in the process of filing for divorce but the wife is counter claiming the reasons even though she was the one who wanted the divorce so I guess is considered contested? But prior to her raising the divorce, they have been sleeping separate rooms for a long time
 
lovefool said:
It is in the process of filing for divorce but the wife is counter claiming the reasons even though she was the one who wanted the divorce so I guess is considered contested? But prior to her raising the divorce, they have been sleeping separate rooms for a long time
Click to expand...
Instead of all those talk, make him assure you with action. Ask him to move out of the house.
There are many who lied when he is exposed and keep on saying it’s in the process of filing for divorce.

Anyway if the wife is the wife is the one who initiate then there shouldn’t be any reason for contested divorce
 
hi the prc lady won't let it go that easy. she married for some future not for divorce. this is plain planto enjoy ...more the merrier.

suggest u give ultimatums and speak directly to the wife if possible. donot blv instoriesif such a episode is out
 
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