Hb heart is broken now. Since our son was borned, I neglected him, didn't really care and sit down talked to each other. He said my words are so harsh and sturborn. Many time I know I juz frustrated when my boy keep cling to me and I still need to work, take care of him and home. I crushed my own marriage life and I am lost..feel like want to disappear in this world now but my son need mummy. I want to salvage my marriage, can u advise me?
Hubby is heart broken now 老公说他心碎了
- Thread starter lei2chua
- Start date
bluzcorner
Member
I noe how u feel cos my job is very taxing n I hv 2 young gals. Do hv some couple time wif ur hubby. Juz hv a simple dinner date or a movie date.
try to get some help in taking care of your son - parent's help, nanny etc to relieve you of some pressure and time. once that happens you'll have some time and energy to care for your hubby.
Like what bluzcorner and stefan have suggested, go for couple dates - be it a simple dinner or movie. Don't be unduly worried for now.
All the best.
Like what bluzcorner and stefan have suggested, go for couple dates - be it a simple dinner or movie. Don't be unduly worried for now.
All the best.
My dear hb quoted "I can't feel anything but I am still alive...".
I don't know what to do now? He said he need time, need to be alone and ask him not to worry about him. Just ask me take care of myself and son. Now his career and our marriage life make him very stress. I cried and heart pain because I don't who can help me and counsel me.. I have nobody to talk to now even my close friends and family.
I don't know what to do now? He said he need time, need to be alone and ask him not to worry about him. Just ask me take care of myself and son. Now his career and our marriage life make him very stress. I cried and heart pain because I don't who can help me and counsel me.. I have nobody to talk to now even my close friends and family.
moorspa7
Member
Lei2chua,
Give yr hubby time to sort things since he is stressed out by work and marriage. Tell him that you will be there for him when he needs you. Give him the space that he needs, he could be hurt emotionally and you need to show him that you treasure this marriage and willing to wait for him til he is ready to talk.
You can still show him concern like cooking his favourite food or favourite drink etc. Show him concern and give him space at the same time. Correct the mistakes that u made in the past and be patient. He still loves u but he is too stressed out now. When he sees that u are sincere to work out this marriage, he will be more receptive to you. Be patient and understanding, and don't worry. Be positive and do what you can to improve yrself. Jia you !
Give yr hubby time to sort things since he is stressed out by work and marriage. Tell him that you will be there for him when he needs you. Give him the space that he needs, he could be hurt emotionally and you need to show him that you treasure this marriage and willing to wait for him til he is ready to talk.
You can still show him concern like cooking his favourite food or favourite drink etc. Show him concern and give him space at the same time. Correct the mistakes that u made in the past and be patient. He still loves u but he is too stressed out now. When he sees that u are sincere to work out this marriage, he will be more receptive to you. Be patient and understanding, and don't worry. Be positive and do what you can to improve yrself. Jia you !
Hi all, Yesterday i was browsing thru e net and found this
about marriage
http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/3-things-i-wish-i-knew-we-got-married
especially the last part "marriage can change e world"
jiayou!
about marriage
http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/3-things-i-wish-i-knew-we-got-married
especially the last part "marriage can change e world"
jiayou!
feelingblessedprincess
New Member
Lei Lei: Something major happened? Marriage life is bourne to suffer with a new addition. Arrange quality time such as lunch/dinner dates to relieve the couplehood.
Mayb you can try calling those foc counselling hotlines like the ones I had google below. Hope your hubby job will get better.
Anything do voice out here or somewhere. Dun jus keep to yourself. If not one will go crazy =(.
Family Service Centre: 1800-838-0100
Family Counselling Service (Family Life Society) - For anyone who requires marital, family & youth counselling.
Tel: 6488-0278 (9:00am - 5:00pm Tue, Wed, Fri & Sat)
(9:00am - 9:00pm Mon & Thurs)
Anything do voice out here or somewhere. Dun jus keep to yourself. If not one will go crazy =(.
Family Service Centre: 1800-838-0100
Family Counselling Service (Family Life Society) - For anyone who requires marital, family & youth counselling.
Tel: 6488-0278 (9:00am - 5:00pm Tue, Wed, Fri & Sat)
(9:00am - 9:00pm Mon & Thurs)
mismulu
New Member
Lei Lei,
I had been through that. My husband complaint that I didn't care about him, never show care for him, that I only care about my son. And I got frustrated with him when he wanted to chat with me or wanted to get intimate with me. I was anxious that my son would wake up from nap and I had not finished the housework. Work stress and lack of sleep did not help. Lots of quarrels and tears.
But Love will pull you through.
I learned to relax and let go. Leave the clothes unfold, do simpler cooking or eat out and rearrange my time and priority.
Your husband is also trying to adjust. Allow him to help out in taking care of your child, so that he doesn't feel left out.
Relax and let go of unneccessary worries. The house can be dirty and messy, what is important is the people living in it are happy. Give him more hugs and kisses. He just need to know you still care about him.
He definitely yearn for your attention, and that means he loves you A Lot!
I had been through that. My husband complaint that I didn't care about him, never show care for him, that I only care about my son. And I got frustrated with him when he wanted to chat with me or wanted to get intimate with me. I was anxious that my son would wake up from nap and I had not finished the housework. Work stress and lack of sleep did not help. Lots of quarrels and tears.
But Love will pull you through.
I learned to relax and let go. Leave the clothes unfold, do simpler cooking or eat out and rearrange my time and priority.
Your husband is also trying to adjust. Allow him to help out in taking care of your child, so that he doesn't feel left out.
Relax and let go of unneccessary worries. The house can be dirty and messy, what is important is the people living in it are happy. Give him more hugs and kisses. He just need to know you still care about him.
He definitely yearn for your attention, and that means he loves you A Lot!
heatherwhite
Member
Lei Lei,
You can always share your worries here, I believe all of us here are willingly to lend our ears to you. Is good to give those counselling hotlines a call (Ashlee has done the search on their hotline for you), there are good counsellers to help you too.
Jia you and cheer up ok. Be strong.
You can always share your worries here, I believe all of us here are willingly to lend our ears to you. Is good to give those counselling hotlines a call (Ashlee has done the search on their hotline for you), there are good counsellers to help you too.
Jia you and cheer up ok. Be strong.
babiesmeme
New Member
I am sure every household goes through this. I am no exception. I see myself quarrel with my husband over small little thing, feeling that he is picking at me that he no longer loves me or care about me. Sometime we said nasty words to each other that hurt us deeply. Sometime i will hide at one corner to let out my steam and cry. We will leave each other alone. Then I think back why i married this guy, those happy memories we have before and after marriage when we have our little darling son, slowly i realise all these small little things is worthless to quarrel with. I will always remind myself how my husband love my son and take care of the family.
readingmum
New Member
I'm sorry to hear about your difficulty. It would be great if you could get a few friends ore relatives to help babysit once in a month or twice in a month so that you can spend them to rest and also spend time with your hubby. Take care.
ai_sakura
Member
Sorry to hear about this. I too think it's important that you make time just for hubby too. It is hard with the kids around but just as it is important to be a mother, so it is to be a wife. Just one or two hours being alone together can work wonders..
Also, I think it's important to have me-time for yourself too. We aren't robots that just give and give.. need time to recharge and relax our own minds and bodies.
Ai @ http://www.sakuraharuka.com
Also, I think it's important to have me-time for yourself too. We aren't robots that just give and give.. need time to recharge and relax our own minds and bodies.
Ai @ http://www.sakuraharuka.com