**How soon can we TTC after going through a mis-carriage?**

M

mitchlim_tan

New Member
Hi Ladies,



I am actually form MTB May 2011 thread but after my visit to my gynae today, I will not be able to join those lucky ladies there. I have to go for an evacuation on Monday to remove my 'baby'. I am at 6wks 5days but strangely doctor can only see the waterbag and not the baby which is not supposed to happen. She took my blood to confirm things and results will be out on Sat however, she has given me heads up that the chances are very high that I need to go through an evacuation. Very upset and dissappointed but pulled myself through with the encouragement of my hubby.



I have accepted this fact and will look at the positive note of keeping myself well and TTC again soon.



Any ladies out there whom have gone through this and eventually conceived again? I just wanted to know how long do we need to wait before TTC again? Appreciate you can share your views and experiences here on this new thread.



Thank you

 


Hi Michelle,



I've not been through this before, but I've got friends who have. Basically, what I understand is that you can TTC as soon as you feel you are ready again, as some ladies take a while to get over the loss.



I've heard that some ladies do a mini confinement to "bu" back their bodies and some may wait 1 or 2 months before TTC.



Since you are seeing your gynae again on Sat, why don't you seek her professional advice? I believe that will be the most assuring.



Good luck to you in your next TTC journey and pregnancy!

 
Michelle, i heard from gynae that have to rest at least 3 mths... this is for the body to recover and also wait for the period to come and be stablise first.. wait for the doc to confirm first... if confirm "bad news", firstly need to "bu" first... cook the confinement food to eat, like sesame, ginger, etc.. can ask yr mum whether she can help to cook or order confinement tiggkit... give yrself some time to rest and when your body is ready (physically & mentally), can try again... all the best to you and try to relax during this period...

 
Anastasia / Auroa



Many thanks for the advices, my doctor also told me that about 2-3 months; maybe I am abit kancheong since age is catching up so trying to conceive and hoefully to make it for delivery next year.



Anyways I think best to be fit rather than going thru more problems later...



Many thanks.

 
Michelle, I TTC again after my 1st normal menses after delivering my boy ( I lost him due to no hb at 19 weeks). My Gynae gave me a green light to try again after 1st normal menses and if I am emotionally ready...



Jia You!!!

 
Michelle,



U hv an oblight ovum which I hv before during my so call 2nd pregnancy after my elder boy was 7 mths old. I rest for abt 6 mths before I tried again and now i am 30 weeks pregnant and gng to due in Nov.



Actually, if u read up the net, this is a pretty common thing juz tat it is usually found out before 3 months so mayb tat y people hardly talk abt it. Btw, I am 35 yrs old this yr le...



Dun stress urself....juz rest well, for me I did nt do any mini confinement tat time....coz dun noe hv to do mah...heehee...



;-)

 
Ling, thanks, will jia you [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



Mitch / Diana, thanks for both your notes, makes a lot of difference to hear positive comments. Diana, yes I have oblight ovum, I spent the past 2 days checking and researching on the net and indeed many out there have this (though not all that common). I will likely need to do the evacuation on Monday (though part of me is still thinking if I should wait since there are ladies who actually waited and eventually get to see the baby after 10 weeks or so but again it could be dangerous, sigh !!) So for now just waiting to be able to keep myself well again so can TTC. I am 39 this year so the numbers are stressing me abit [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif].... oh and congrats on your 30wk baby now, am sure you're doing well (happy) [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



Take care ladies..

 
Hi Mitchelle,

You need to take gd care and rest atleast 2-3 mth before TTC. Try to get relaxing massage.

 
Hi Michelle,



I have my D&C in Mar2010... My doctor advice me to rest for 3mth as to make my body recover & make my womb strong! Remember to do a mini confinement...



Take Good care... I know is not easy for you... But do remember you are not alone....

 
Hi Michelle! I had a D&C in March too, but I am currently 18 weeks preggers and experiencing a healthy pregnancy. I basically conceived in mid- May again- about 2 months after I had my D&C.



So take heart, I am sure God will bless you again soon. =)



I know it is not an easy thing to go through, but know that it is not your fault in any way and keep your thoughts positive.



This was my blog that kinda captured my thoughts during my pregnancy, when I found out about my miscarriage, right until after my D&C.



http://inmemoryofweebabe.blogspot.com/



Hope you find comfort and encouragement in it whatever your religious beliefs might be. =)

 
And yes I did do a mini confinement of about 2 weeks. It is most helpful. =)

 
I was on TCM and drinking only chicken essence. And I lost my baby in mid sept, conceive again in early Dec same yr.

As long as u feel ready u can TTC.

 
Hi Michelle



Juz wan to say Jia you.. In the same boat as u..in fact one step behind.. Am awaiting the final diagnosis for blight ovum.. I was also a May 2011 mummy =)

 
Geri, I read your blog, very well written and to some extend some parts of it relates to my thoughts. Thanks for sharing and indeed I find comfort and confidence in wanting to TTC again. God Bless and keep well [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



Hopefully, thanks for sharing, your timing mentioned is almost like mine... I just did my evacuation today.



Raerae, thanks and Jia You to you too... given that I am one step ahead, I can share with you what I went thru. My bloodtest eventually showed that my HCG levels were dropping and I went thru the procedure today. Let's stay in touch, it would be nice to comfort each other and also to remind each other that we can still do it again.



All ladies out there, do keep well !

 
Michelle: Hmm i havent gone for any blood test coz my gynea was to go for a dating test. Coz we dun really know when i ovulated and just to be make sure the timeline as i just stopped breastfeeding when i fell preggie. Do tell me abt the procedure..which thread will u be?

 
Hi Raerae,



Sorry to hear about your news. I'm from the same month thread as you in 2009, though I'm not very active, only post once in a while.



Hope you keep your spirits up and jia you too! I also just stopped breastfeeding and I'm TTC #2, but no luck yet. I've not gotten my menses at all, so I think chances are low. Anyway, you take care and all the best to you!

 
Hi Michelle,



Me too, was in the similar boat as you. Had my D&C in April'10. Emotions aside, My mum insist that i do a confinement so i did, had TCM tonics and really watch what I ate.

My gynae also ask me to rest for at least 3 months,however i discovered I was preggers in the 3rd month.

My gynae wasn't very hoping then, put me on hormonal pills for the whole 1st trimester, now i'm into my 14th week and it's going well for me.



Keep the faith! the rest will fall in place soon!

 
Raerae: I went for my procedure on Monday, the doctor calls it an 'evacuation'. I was there in the morning at 11am as the doctor had to insert two tables in me to open my cervix and after the insertion I had to wait for 3 hours before she can perform the evacuation. I was then sedated at about 2.20pm, as soon as the nurse inject the medication into me, it took only like a few seconds before I felt groggy and the next thing I knew, I am up at 4pm. Everything was over. I am now on a mini-confinement, ordered food from catering which turned out quite good, expensive though. I am fine emotionally although there are times I feel the pain just thinking that my pregnancy fell thru the cracks. Physically, things were okay following the 2 days after the procedure however today I had bad cramps all day, kinda worried so hoping the cramps will just go away. Anyway, husband and I have agreed that we should try again therefore appreciate all those ladies who have given me encouragement through this thread.



Tres: Awesome that you're preggers again, though I don't know you having just met you here, I feel happy for you [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] Hmmmm... talking about TTC, I was hoping to even try it earlier although my doc mentioned about 3 months before I should start trying so part of me is thinking that best is to follow advices to minimize any problems but part of me is like feeling 'kan-cheong' hoping to try earlier to achieve good news [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
hi michelle, sorry to hear the bad news from u. me too, i had d&c last mth, after no heartbeat from baby, after d&c my bleeding lasted 2abt 2week, and for the first week i try not to take painkille, but the cramp is like hell, so end up i have to take it on time. If not i wont even able to walk. I visit my doc 2week after my d&c, by the time my bleeding only stopped the day befor, but my doc say i'm ready ttc anytime. I ask him abt the wait 3 mth advice. But he say Don have to wait. Just normal. Don stress... anyway Till now its been 1mth after my d&c, i did ttc, but don think i'm preg-_-" not tat lucky ba, but mens is not here too. Kinda confuse. Donno wat to do...

 
Hi Michelle,



I'm surprised abt me being preggers so fast, it wasn't plan and in fact I wanted to wait for 3-6 months to heal but it came as a surprise to us.

So far it's being fine till my next check up!

BUt frankly, I'm still paranoid, keep ressuring myself as long as there is no bleeding, half the battle is won!! ;-) Still praying hard & keeping my fingers crossed!

ps: Dun think we have met coz I just join this forum. Thanks for your well wishes tho!



Eve: Dun stress, just take some tonics and watch what you eat these few weeks then your body should be fine liao!

Accordingly to my gynae, best is to have your at least 3 mths of menses so that your womb lining will be even for the foetus to nest onto it. Let nature take its course, there is always medical helpebhind to boost the preganancy. Take it easy & Take care!

 
Hi Michell,

I am sorry about your loss. Today is the first day i am using my computer after a D&C.

I went to my first preg check up at KKH on 13 Sept and the ultrasound technician told me that she found no heart beat and my baby was only measured 5.7 weeks while i thought i was abt 8 weeks preg. I felt numb and cried alot. I want to seek 2nd opinion so i go back to my gynae who delivered my first child, Dr. Benjamin Tham @ TMC. I visited his clinic on 20 Sept morning and had another ultra scan. He said he found nothing but the sac and i actually was internal bleeding. He give me two options, to go for a D&C or take induce abortion pill Cyotec. He said its not good for me to wait nature take it course coz i was already bleeding. I choose the 2nd option and left. I felt devastated, i was awake that night and i know i can't do it, i feel very bad and guilty, we wanted this baby so badly. The next day i go back to Dr. Tham's office, I had a D&C and discharged at the same day. I believed that you have experience kind of grieving during the week just like me. Thanks God i have my hubby and my lil' boy's support and comfort at this difficult moment. I was surprised to know many mommies out there experienced the same loss.My doctor ask me to rest and wait for at least another 2 months for my womb to be healed, he said this is v common and ask me to think abt brighter side. I know i still need time for my grief but i also put on hope like all of you. Again i am sorry and please take care Michelle. *Hugs*

 
Bodor, u must take care, and jy.... its really hard to take it, i seriously hate ppl keep asking mi not to talk and think abt, as i felt tat, its easy to say, but not easy to do...& i rather face it then avoid it...



time can make u feel better...but one awhile i believe will still think of baby. but.. anyway, u still have ur hub & boy with u... so u are not alone...



we shall all jy together!

 
tres, thanks, i will let nature take its course...



ur baby is a march baby i believe? i actually a march/apr mum too, but its ok... i will jy! :D u must jy too!

 
Hi Michelle,



Take it positively first. When emotionally ok and health feel better go ahead.

I had a mc on April 2010. Upset for a start n I have e sane case as you. See water bag but no foetus. I have sever bleeding too. So gynae do e blood test too n confirm no baby.



I had a mini confinement at home. Took Ginger wine n chicken essence too. After 3 months and in July 2010 I am preg again. Now 13weeks n bb is ok too.



My advice is build back your health first before TTC. End result is positive.



Jia you & take care yeah [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
Hi Michelle, I was from the May 2011 thread too. I guess I am in the same situation as you. At 7 weeks 4 days, we went for our second scan. In anticipation to see the water bag and foetus, we saw nothing but the waterbag though it has grown to the size it should have been. The gynae I was seeing was so unsympathetic and just said:"oh, ur baby can't be seen" and signalled for me to get up from the bed.

When we wanted to sign the package, his nurse advised us

not to (later we realized that it was the Gynae who gave instruction to her not to let us sign).

The same night and the following day, I had spotting and went to TMC to see him. We spent more than $300 on him for another scan, his consultation fee and duphaston tablets. His only words to us were:" since the baby can't be seen and you have spotting, it's 90% chance u are going to have a miscarriage. This is why I did not let u sign the package last nite. Do you gave questions to ask me?"

After chking with my tcm physician, she recommended that I go for a progesterone injection as the effect of duphaston will not be able to stop the spotting immediately. Seeing that the Gynae was in such a rush and so unsympathetic, we went to see another Gynae for the injection. Thinking back, we regretted seeing our first Gynae and we finally understood why his clinic has so few patients.

Now we are praying hard that we will see the baby in 2 weeks time. Though we know that the outcome leans towards a blighted ovum, we hope for a miracle to happen.

 
HI Michelle,



Thanks for sharing. I am kind of still waiting coz my gynae is out of town and now i am seeing a substitute gynae.



Currently going for another scan tmr. ALTHOUGH the dr says we will most prob not see any heartbeat. It is just to decide if we should let the body handle the miscarriage itself or do a d/c. I am so impatient already!



For me, emotionally it was much easier than alot of you coz mine was a complicated pregnancy. I had twins: 2 babies in 1 sac it turns out will be a bad pregancy. as in the end the babies will outcompete each other. Nevertheless, it is God,s will and like the rest of the mummies say, the next try will be positive



Jia you!

 
Hi ladies,



Would like to ask those who had done a d & c or evacuation procedure. How much does the procedure cost and what is the recovery period (as in how many days of medical leave required)?



I went for a scan again this afternoon. At 8 weeks 3 days, we could only see the water bag with no baby in it. While waiting for a final scan scheduled next week, we are mentally prepared that it is a blighted ovum. Just like to inform my boss on what to expect as I m currently on hospitalization leave for bed rest till the scan next week.

 
Chocolate_Soh, my d&c cost me $1035 (with GST). My clinic told me I could use medisave but I did not since I had insurance (if use medisave, you pay about $240 in cash). I kinda recovered the next day meaning, no pain but was still bleeding, the bleeding ofcourse gets lesser and lesser and eventually after 9 days (today is the 9th day), the bleeding stop. I had my procedure on Monday and the doctor gave me MC the whole week until Friday (I was back at work on Thursday). Please take care, don't feel too bad about it (I know easier said), I do still feel the emotional pain but on the other hand, looking forward to heal and start TTC again. Oh and after 10 days of the procedure, you will likely need to go back to the doctor to do a scan to ensure everything went well, so am going back tomorrow.



Raerae, hope all is well, whatever you choose, just monitor your own body, anything un-usual, call/go visit the gynae immediately. I am no expert myself but going thru this experience I learnt much more about pregnancy.

 
Cynthia, congrats and nice to hear that baby is doing well. I read alot of reviews and hear many people telling me to try again (don't give up) which is something I would hopefully try for. Will share more as I move along... thanks for sharing, its a positive sign for people like me [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] By the way I also did a mini confinement for a week, catered confinement food and stop taking cold drink ever since.



Eve & Bodor: I guess as what everyone is saying we should try not to stress and take things easily; So let's give each other encouragement to go through this ok [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] Take care and keep well.

 
Hi Michelle,



Million thanks for your detailed info about what to expect for the d & c procedure. It is greatly appreciated.



No doubt we will be sad about the loss, I feel that at least we have done our best, as in trying for the baby and eventually conceived. Let's hope for much better luck in our next pregnancy as I did research on blighted ovum that it is unlikely to happen twice.



Hope your scan today shows all is well.



Take care.

 
Eve > My MCed baby is suppose to be due in Oct'10. With my current pregnancy is will be due in Mar'11!



To the rest, just take care and think positive!! After MC you will be very fertile, so can try again soon!

 
Hi Michelle & Ladies



I have a chemical miscarriage in May'10..and gynae ask me to wait for 3 months before tcc again.

Can understand the pain you ladies have gone through. I even stop visiting the forum after the lost cos i feel really very devastated.

Even though for me..my baby is not even form yet and i miscarried him.

After months, i feel better now..and my hubby had been very encouraging.

I am now tcc again..just started last month.

Hoping to recieve good news soon too.

Hope we all will be blessed with a healthy baby!! [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
chocholate_soh: most welcome, happy to provide and share as much as I can, which is why we are all here. Scan went well, doctor saw a fibrod but said nothing to worry about, it is small and had nothing to do with my MC. You take care and keep well.



Hi Victoria, nice to see you joining this forum, hope this thread will give you confidence as some ladies shared their sad experiences but then later on had happy news too. I am hoping to be like them so like all others said "jia you". Hmmm.. I am on the waiting to TTC period so hope to join you soon [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



To the rest of the nice ladies here, have a good weekend and rest well.



Cheers,

Michelle

 
Hi All, also from the May 2011 thread.. I noe Michelle and Chocolate_soh was from there too.. Chocolate_soh, rem we supposed to have the same EDD? so sad to hear all your stories, i tink you have to go through it before u really can understand the pain...

we visited the gynae at wk 8 day 2 last Tue. Gynae also told us baby didn't grow much and has no heartbeat.. as this is our first child and we had also been ttc-ing for some time, we were really devastated at first.. No matter wat logic or nice words we heard, it couldn't go into our minds.. Have calmed down a bit more this week. Waiting to do a detailed scan this Wed before deciding what to do...

 
min21: I know exactly how you feel, stay strong and keep focus simply because you need to build back your health and strength to TTC again... keep well and take care.

 
Hi michelle: Thanks for ur support n advice. i am going for my D/C tmr.. Kinda anxious ..for me i think it is abit better emotionally as my pregnancy would have been very complicated. So God is still good to have let this happen and prevent me from more heartaches.



Like u say, we will learn and move on,its an experience but good that we can share. Asking "why" will not help. for all the other ladies, feel encouraged that so many others have successful pregnancies after a MC.



Let's cont to come in here and encourage one another! We are nv alone =)

 
Hi Min21,

I am going for my scan tonite too. Hope to see a miracle. Was actually thinking of hvg a d & c or cypotec to remove the baby if we still don't see it today.

After hearing from my hb abt what happened to his friend's wife in her 3 previous pregnancies, we have decided to take a gamble and wait till week 13 or 14.

In her 3 previous pregnancies, she was diagnosed with blighted ovum and she suffered from heavy bleeding. For the second baby, they took a gamble and waited till the end of the first trimester where their baby boy finally appeared. Their boy is now a healthy 3-year old and very active.

I hope this miracle will happen to those couples who still cherish hope. There is a website containing stories of many ladies who are misdiagnosed with miscarriage - www.misdiagnosedmiscarriage.com

Reading those stories keep our hopes high though they don't change the outcome of our pregnancy.

 
Hi chocolate_soh, how is it?

Yest when we saw the results of the 2nd scan which was the same as the first, I was determined to move on. However, a colleague's call this morning made me waver again.. She said gynae also did not detect her bb heartbeat at wk 6, was too small and told her to remove immediately. However, she waited and her baby is now a healthy one.. Though our stories is slightly different, this made me so confused. After a 2nd scan done by a different team, what is the chance that bb is really fine? Trying to call the gynae now to see if its ok to let bb remain in the body..

 
min21,



I m going for my d& c next week. My previous scan still showed no baby and the sac has also stopped growing. Having bleeding and spotting everyday even though I m taking progesterone tablets thus hb n I feel there is very little hope. Might as well move on so tt we can tic again soon.



How many weeks r u in now? R u hvg any m/c symptoms? If not, I feel tt there is no harm waiting for another 1 or 2 weeks more to confirm tt the baby is not growing. At least if eventually u got to remove the bb ( touch wood), u know tt u hv done ur best n won't regret in ur decision.



Hope a miracle will happen to ur bb. Take care.

 
Sorry, min21. I m so blur to hv forgotten tt we are supposed to hv the same edd so u shd now be 9 w 6 days.

Do keep us updated on ur decision.

Wishing u all the best.

 
Hello chocolate_soh, I've done the D&C on Mon 11 Oct.. Have started bleeding since last Friday and after talking to the gynae, decided not to take any further risk. Gynae mentioned that heavy bleeding is no good for mum and it could further complicate the D&C process.. Thus he asked that we go to A&E on mon and he will do the op.. As the op was done late afternoon, had to be warded for a night.. now am back at home resting..

My hb also wanted to wait initially.. i tink he really can't bear to let our bb go n he also feels no harm anyway.. I felt so bad when i said i wanted to do the D&C and move on..

Hope u take care also.. sometimes am thinking if the pregnancy had gone on fine, we would have been in our 10th week already!

 
Hi Min21 N Choco Soh



How is everything? Hope that you both are resting well..I had my D/C a week ago..Had a mini confinement for a week ...



Do take heart to heal emotionally as well as physically =) My dr told me tat most of the time, blight ovum usu is due to extreme defects or chromosomal errors. and the fact tat u conceived is encouraging coz means our bodies are alrite =)



Jia you to all...

 
Hi min21 and Raerae,



I did my d&c on 12 Oct. The night before, as I finished my progesterone tablets, I started bleeding heavily with clots. It got worse in the midnite with bad cramps and contractions.

Cldnt get to sleep and went to the toilet to chk on my soaked pads every half an hour. Was thinking of going to A & E but in the end did not since my d&c is scheduled on the next day.

Struggled thru the night and when I woke up in the morning and stepped out of bed, I felt a heavy clot dropping on my pad. Was so shocked to see a big clot (looks like pig brain and sticky tissues on my pad). Sorry if too much info. Only then I realized I passed out my water bag. At Ty time, my bleeding got much lighter than the night before.

When we went to the Gynae, I told him Ty I hv miscarried naturally and he did a scan for me and we saw tt only the placenta was left and I still had to go thru the procedure.

After the procedure, the bleeding was also manageable but cramps still continue. I feel pain in my vagina and my stomach especially when I cough. Anyone feeling the same after the procedure?

Pains from the procedure aside, I feel better in terms of the closure. My hb n I look fwd to trying again after my 2nd normal cycle starts. We are not going to wait 3 months as recommended by the Gynae as we feel tt we r emotionally ready and I will be more fertile only in the first 3 months as found in some research.

 
Hi Raerae and chocolate_soh, hope both of u r feeling better now too.. my mum is also doing a mini confinement for me too.. but not really mini also, she is quite extensive! but for my own good, i just listen n follow..



chocolate_soh, sounds like u had quite heavy bleeding, better nourish urself during this period of rest.. whoa, how did u recognise e water bag?? my cramps came e moment e general anesthestic wear off.. bt after e painkiller, it was much better.. not sure if its due to the heaty food i eat these days, stomach tends to get sharp pain at times, and my anus also quite pain.. i woke up so early also bcoz of e pain.. planning to go c a GP ltr..



good that everyone is feeling better. my gynae also said can try after 2nd normal cycle.. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] good luck to everyone!

 
Raerae,



My situation is the same as u. I had twins pregnancy and find out no heartbeat in week 13. So had evacation last month.



Now having confinement. It has been 3rd weeks. I am still feeling emotional at times. Sometimes depressing...

 


Hi Cynthia and Tres,



Gald to see u here to encourage us...



How long does it takes u to recover emotionally?

Yesterday, my hubby had a talk with me. He hoping to see that i move on and get control of my emotions. But however, he makes me feel very depressed and useless.



Small little thing can get on my nerves. I have been crying on and off after MC. One day, my hubby said to me " Stop crying." when i am still crying then....



At that time, i really feel like slapping him on his face... But i didn't as i am with my parents and relatives in the public place.

 
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