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Right now I am feel tired of trying. Trying to manage work and endless deadlines better, housework and cooking better, trying to conceive. Trying to keep to better diet so that maybe I will not have miscarriages again. Trying to lose weight, look better, dress better. Trying to look "hold it together all the time", trying not to ever get upset. Doing all of these while doing everything. Am I normal?

Maybe you need a break
Too stressed
 
Right now I am feel tired of trying. Trying to manage work and endless deadlines better, housework and cooking better, trying to conceive. Trying to keep to better diet so that maybe I will not have miscarriages again. Trying to lose weight, look better, dress better. Trying to look "hold it together all the time", trying not to ever get upset. Doing all of these while doing everything. Am I normal?
Think you may be burnt out.Rest more whenever you can and recharge yourself mentally and physically.
 
We cannot do all things cos we have only 24 hours a day.You will have to divide stuff like housework to do.Take it step by step,one at a time.

You are a human being and not a robot.
 
Right now I am feel tired of trying. Trying to manage work and endless deadlines better, housework and cooking better, trying to conceive. Trying to keep to better diet so that maybe I will not have miscarriages again. Trying to lose weight, look better, dress better. Trying to look "hold it together all the time", trying not to ever get upset. Doing all of these while doing everything. Am I normal?
Well its normal. Just that you need take a break at times as well.
Need to do things step by step rather than all lump together.
Take care babe
 
Life is like driving. you try to anticipate hence you try and try, steer abit here abit there just make sure u reach the destination.

"steering" is the fun part. u see diff thing when you go off-track. u learn and steer agn. all straight path is crooked when zoom in on them.

try to maintain positive thinking.

there's no wrong nor right in the path of life. the only wrong is u didn't try.

u feel tired is becoz you don't hv a purpose and a goal. set baby goals will do. u achieve, u celebrate. u don't then and try agn.

be glad that u still can try.
 
I think you are setting too many goals at the same time? Will advise you to take one step at a time and enjoy the process? Being stressed up will also impact your health and TTC journey. If age is catching up, do you want to focus more on TTC journey and adjust your work priorities?
 
You're spreading yourself too thin (think of a small amount of butter being spread over a large piece of bread). It's okay to take a break once in a while.
 
Dear Nora06, you need to prioritise. What is the most important thing to you right now? You can only do things well if you are in a healthy state of mind. By juggling so many tasks at one time, feeling burnt out and stressed out, there is no way you can accomplish those things you want. Prioritise what is most important to you. Enlist help for housework, such as getting your hubby to do instead, or employing a helper. Or else, spend money and get those robotic cleaners, which I did. Cooking can be done by your hubby as well. Else, just order tingkat. All jobs can be done by someone else, don't pressure yourself into shouldering everything. There is only one thing that someone else can't do for you, which is to conceive a baby. I have been somewhat in that situation, thought not as overwhelmed as you. End of the day, I decide my family comes first, and there is only a short span of time women can conceive. I was in a happier place after that, and career went smoothly for me thereafter.
 
Let me share my personal story. I got married at the age of 31. After I went back office after taking leave to plan my wedding, my immediate superior called me into a meeting room and told me he wished I would postpone my family planning, as he wanted me to lead a project at the time. Stupidly, I agreed, and only started trying 2 years later at 33 after the project is completed. It took me 1.5 years to finally conceive, but unfortunately I miscarried my first baby. During my performance review, my immediate superior informed me I was penalised for not partaking in certain projects, which was due to my pregnancy at the time. Imagine my anger and disgust after hearing that despite sacrificing two precious years of postponing my family plans. I vowed never to place career first thereafter, and was pregnant again 1 year later after that miscarriage. When I gave birth to my first son, I was nearly 36. Due to my age, it would be another 5 years before I finally gave birth to my second boy. However, it was a long tedious road of TTC during those 5 years, having gone through multiple sessions of TCM, IVFs etc. Those times, I really regret my decision to postpone my family planning right after marriage at the suggestion of my immediate superior, and I still wonder if I might have more children if I didn't. I can never turn back time, but if I had prioritise properly back then, I would never have placed career first.
 
Right now I am feel tired of trying. Trying to manage work and endless deadlines better, housework and cooking better, trying to conceive. Trying to keep to better diet so that maybe I will not have miscarriages again. Trying to lose weight, look better, dress better. Trying to look "hold it together all the time", trying not to ever get upset. Doing all of these while doing everything. Am I normal?

For trying to conceive, perhaps you can try multiple methods...For others like housework / cooking better, all these take time...and for house chores, I think you can discuss with your husband to share the loads. Being unable to conceive is not 1 person matter, same to a marriage & family... you need to work together with your husband.

Try not to push yourself too hard.

What I do is that always communicate with husband (staying with his sisters & parents currently). I am not a dog lover and I really particular on hygiene and cleanliness of house... but his sister who adopted a dog didn't help on house chores to keep the common area clean and neat --- which affect my mood a lot, I got PCOS and easily depressed.

Another suggestion is that you might wish to take some supplements which help to boost up your positivity, not leading to depression while trying to conceive.

Working vs planning plan, somehow you need to prioritize what you really wish to achieve.

I quitted a job which I just started months ago (stress, everyday also unhappy, feel demotivated, negativity) & found myself a more suitable job (start work 1/12/2020 - considered stress-less, job scope I am familiar with, happy, self-achieved feel). Stay at home already got lots of unhappy, glad that I am having a happy working hour.

So I am just started my ttc plan after around 2 yrs of marriage - a bit late compared with others, but who knows this is actually the right timing for me?

You might want to find someone close to you to share your thoughts, go for outings with friends and have a good high-tea time. Just go ahead and enjoy life! Stay cheers!
 
Dear Nora06, you need to prioritise. What is the most important thing to you right now? You can only do things well if you are in a healthy state of mind. By juggling so many tasks at one time, feeling burnt out and stressed out, there is no way you can accomplish those things you want. Prioritise what is most important to you. Enlist help for housework, such as getting your hubby to do instead, or employing a helper. Or else, spend money and get those robotic cleaners, which I did. Cooking can be done by your hubby as well. Else, just order tingkat. All jobs can be done by someone else, don't pressure yourself into shouldering everything. There is only one thing that someone else can't do for you, which is to conceive a baby. I have been somewhat in that situation, thought not as overwhelmed as you. End of the day, I decide my family comes first, and there is only a short span of time women can conceive. I was in a happier place after that, and career went smoothly for me thereafter.
Thanks a lot really appreciate it :)
 
Let me share my personal story. I got married at the age of 31. After I went back office after taking leave to plan my wedding, my immediate superior called me into a meeting room and told me he wished I would postpone my family planning, as he wanted me to lead a project at the time. Stupidly, I agreed, and only started trying 2 years later at 33 after the project is completed. It took me 1.5 years to finally conceive, but unfortunately I miscarried my first baby. During my performance review, my immediate superior informed me I was penalised for not partaking in certain projects, which was due to my pregnancy at the time. Imagine my anger and disgust after hearing that despite sacrificing two precious years of postponing my family plans. I vowed never to place career first thereafter, and was pregnant again 1 year later after that miscarriage. When I gave birth to my first son, I was nearly 36. Due to my age, it would be another 5 years before I finally gave birth to my second boy. However, it was a long tedious road of TTC during those 5 years, having gone through multiple sessions of TCM, IVFs etc. Those times, I really regret my decision to postpone my family planning right after marriage at the suggestion of my immediate superior, and I still wonder if I might have more children if I didn't. I can never turn back time, but if I had prioritise properly back then, I would never have placed career first.
Thanks so much for sharing. I really feel for you. Really appreciate your reply.
 
For trying to conceive, perhaps you can try multiple methods...For others like housework / cooking better, all these take time...and for house chores, I think you can discuss with your husband to share the loads. Being unable to conceive is not 1 person matter, same to a marriage & family... you need to work together with your husband.

Try not to push yourself too hard.

What I do is that always communicate with husband (staying with his sisters & parents currently). I am not a dog lover and I really particular on hygiene and cleanliness of house... but his sister who adopted a dog didn't help on house chores to keep the common area clean and neat --- which affect my mood a lot, I got PCOS and easily depressed.

Another suggestion is that you might wish to take some supplements which help to boost up your positivity, not leading to depression while trying to conceive.

Working vs planning plan, somehow you need to prioritize what you really wish to achieve.

I quitted a job which I just started months ago (stress, everyday also unhappy, feel demotivated, negativity) & found myself a more suitable job (start work 1/12/2020 - considered stress-less, job scope I am familiar with, happy, self-achieved feel). Stay at home already got lots of unhappy, glad that I am having a happy working hour.

So I am just started my ttc plan after around 2 yrs of marriage - a bit late compared with others, but who knows this is actually the right timing for me?

You might want to find someone close to you to share your thoughts, go for outings with friends and have a good high-tea time. Just go ahead and enjoy life! Stay cheers!

Thank you for sharing. I’m 31 this year, my boss has been asking me if I want kid, told me to inform him early if I got pregnant, so that he could plan man power early. I guess he mean so that he could rotate me to somewhere else early. I have come to understand that job is to support our lives, not replace it. Our live is much more important than the job which could be replaced by anyone. But no one could replace us in our family.


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