lily_v

New Member
We are both in our early thirties. Met via dating app and married two years ago. He insults me almost on a daily basis. Things that he will say, “you are so slow” “you are so useless” “what can you do” “you must fulfill your wifey duties, if not I marry you for what?” “You are beyond stupid” “what’s the point of keeping the house clean? I do not appreciate it” all these are very wrong and I know it myself. No idea what kept me married. Last night, he insulted me really badly, because I accidentally pressed order on my grab app without myself knowing it, and wasted $9 on food we didn’t collect. This morning, he continued to insult me, saying I am very useless, and he wants to call for a divorce. To be honest, I am never really happy in this marriage and I know I need to end it. Wondering, if it’s possible to divorce on the grounds of mental abuse ?
 


Based on unreasonable behaviour. Then cite the mental abuse etc. Bad husband material. Did you scold him back ? Maybe you too gentle so he take advantage to bully you.
 
Based on unreasonable behaviour. Then cite the mental abuse etc. Bad husband material. Did you scold him back ? Maybe you too gentle so he take advantage to bully you.
No, I did not scold him back. If I were to ever argue my points, the scolding will be even longer and worse.(tried that before). There was once, I was trying to cook, he stood behind me and started saying how lousy I am. He even said, he will want to supervise me every time I cook. Then when I was done, I told him, I didn’t like the way he stood behind me and how he was treating me like a subordinate. He started arguing and started saying how lousy, unprepared I was, blah blah blah. He insulted me for one whole hour. I feel so disgusted and annoyed with myself for staying in this marriage. I am so unhappy.
 
Both of you are not fated to be together. He has brought up divorce. You shd start serious discussions. No point blame or find fault. Just not fated. So better to move on. Life is short.
 
No, I did not scold him back. If I were to ever argue my points, the scolding will be even longer and worse.(tried that before). There was once, I was trying to cook, he stood behind me and started saying how lousy I am. He even said, he will want to supervise me every time I cook. Then when I was done, I told him, I didn’t like the way he stood behind me and how he was treating me like a subordinate. He started arguing and started saying how lousy, unprepared I was, blah blah blah. He insulted me for one whole hour. I feel so disgusted and annoyed with myself for staying in this marriage. I am so unhappy.

Your are such a kind gentle lady though I don't know you. Please leave him. You deserve a better husband. He is a trash husband material.

Don't second think. Just divorce him. Do your homework and gather evidence. Get a good divorce lawyer.
 
Firstly, y u two get married? If really not suitable pls divorce as we only live for once. Be happy n be yourself.
 
It's better to get out of toxic marriage than remaining unhappy for life. It can kill u sliently. U deserve someone better or be free like a bird from a cage.
 
Get a good lawyer and divorce him.....He is making your life a living hell.

You cannot continue like this forever.He does not deserve you even though you are gentle and did not do anything wrong.
 
“Unintentionally “ share these articles with him



Another common trait frequently seen in toxic marriages is anger. Any argument or disagreement leads to an extremely bad temper in one partner, making it impossible to interact in a meaningful way.

I always post articles at between app, not directly send to my hub but in a common app to open heart discussion.

It always include “handling conflicts”, “effective communication “ etc

Sometimes we will just hold a “friendly” discussion and I take the opportunity to let him
Know how I feel and recently I come out with “family core values” like

1 Be kind to your family members
2. Watch your emotions and tone when talking
3. Be considerate

Try to find a chance to talk to him and let him
Know how u feel. Communication is very important. Don’t wait till conflicts then communicate, it will be too late then.
 
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can easily read the actions ..someone better has come in life and most likely he wants to quicken the divorce ..just sit and talk openly and make sure get alimony as per law
 
We are both in our early thirties. Met via dating app and married two years ago. He insults me almost on a daily basis. Things that he will say, “you are so slow” “you are so useless” “what can you do” “you must fulfill your wifey duties, if not I marry you for what?” “You are beyond stupid” “what’s the point of keeping the house clean? I do not appreciate it” all these are very wrong and I know it myself. No idea what kept me married. Last night, he insulted me really badly, because I accidentally pressed order on my grab app without myself knowing it, and wasted $9 on food we didn’t collect. This morning, he continued to insult me, saying I am very useless, and he wants to call for a divorce. To be honest, I am never really happy in this marriage and I know I need to end it. Wondering, if it’s possible to divorce on the grounds of mental abuse ?
Clearly he is abusing you and affecting your mental health, whether its possible or not to file divorce based on mental abuse, I'd say you should just leave him first. He is devaluing you, it may not seem like a big deal now but over the years you can see the impacts on your self-development. give him a taste of his own medicine, let him know how does it feel to be insulted.
 
Some husbands wont realized how good their wife is until they are single again. But some men will always think they are the best, they are god sent.
Some husbands started to change after years of marriage especially when they turn 40. I've witnessed this in my own family and also heard from my colleagues. Different backgrounds, different race and different family settings yet, the problems with husbands are same. They're so confident that they're always right and we are obliged to follow whatever they say, otherwise, they blame us for disrespecting them.
 

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