Confinement Lady to be wary of

[poko1]

Hello. I just want to relate my experience with a confinement lady who lives in Yishun. She has a English name with starting with a "I". She claims that she has experience in handling twins and triplets and this is all she will do. She hardly do singletons she said. I have no doubts at all abt her abilities but it is her actions and words used that made me really upset.



Continue reading and u tell me if i shd be upset.



I have delivered a set of twins in June. They were of gestational age 34 weeks upon delivery and the reason why i had to deliver them at 34 weeks instead of the usual 35/36 weeks is bcos one of the twin was not putting on weight ( Dr have been monitering his weight for a month and it was stagnant at 1 over kg, and it was amazingly that i could hold it to 34 weeks pregnancy!)



Twin 1(older twin) was the lighter babe. He weighed 1.6kg. The other twin was 1.9 kg.

As he was light weight, he was in the NICU for 3 weeks. The other twin was at the NICU for 2 weeks. They were basically alright. Just light weight.



I have paid a deposit of 1k to her prior to delivery. She said that this is standard practice for her as she is very popular and needs us to confirm we want her. We paid the 1k. She photocopied her IC to us and said that she wont run away with the money. Her services for twins are at 2.8K. No housework at all. Just cook and take care of me and babes. She said that she is unlike other confinement ladies who do simple h/w. She added that she is a professional. We acceped that. Hmm....we wondered.....



We found it hard to find confinement ladies who wanted to do twins. We had a few who rejected us too, so we were happy to get one experienced with twins!!!



The confinement lady called me many times before and after i delivered to "follow up". When she knew i have delivered, she said that she wanted to start immediately. I said that the twins r in hospital and will be there between 2 weeks to a month! She said that she cant wait for so long and she needed to start within 10 days of my delivery so that she can accept other job offers. I asked her politely who she will take care of when the babes are not back. She said that she will take care of me. Yes, that is important but i need her help more once the twins are back.



I plead with her to wait. She called nearly everyday to find out when she can start. I was so stressed as i was recovering frm my c sec and had to go to the hospital daily to see the babes and give them the expressed milk and yet the confinement lady had to add on to my stress. At one point i chose not to answer her phone when i saw her number on my hp.



On the day 10 of my delivery, the confinement lady called again and demanded that she needs to start now. Regardless if babes are back. She added that i have the right to tell the dr that i want the babes to be discharged and to tell the dr that the confinement lady can do a better job of plumpming them up!!! I told her i cant do that and its really the Dr's decision to discharge them and not hers!!!



She added that the hospital charges must be low that is why i choose to continue to put then there. I was like ????...Anyone noes that NICU is hefty!!!



She said that in this case, she cant work for me then. I asked her what happens to my 1k deposit and she said too bad, this 1k is to prevent us from rejecting their services at the last min. I tol her i didnt reject her, but the babes need another 2 weeks in the hospital.



She said that among her 20 yrs of doing confinement, she has never had babies who had to stay there for so long. I said that they are twins and there is always a chance of an even much much earlier delivery in multiples! I even said that she can start when my heavier twin gets back in a few days and asked for a lower charge as now its singleton she is caring for. She said that she will charge a hundred dollars lesser than the 2.8k initially agreed on. I said 2.7K for 1 baby ???



To cut the story short, my 1k was gone, no confinement lady at this most crutial time and this made me depressed. In the end, i ate no confinement food, no "special herbal water" to bath.



I am stronger now and i have "pu" myself up with other forms of nourishments after my twins were discharged and thus i can relate my experience to parents of multiples.



I have regained my sanity of caring for my twins in the hospital, and i have rested at home too. I thus called her a week ago, and asked if i can get half of my 1k back. Guess what did she say???



She said that luckily i called her as she has lost my number. She wanted to call me to tell me to pay a "fine" of $200 for not engaging her services last min resulting in loss of job offers.



I gasped and slammed the phone of cos...

 

[september]

Call her again and tell her u r taking her to small claim court and will get lawyer to sue her and see wat she say.

 

[poko1]

Thanks Diana for yr advice. Can i really do that?? It is because there was a "contract of services" that we signed for when we paid the deposit. Yes, a contract!!! Very biz like. It is totally in Chinese and we havent got around reading it..sigh...

 

[choco_mm]

poko



i was shocked to hear what happen to u.

such unreasonable CL.

how can she request for the twins to be discharged. does she really think she is better then the docs.

luckily u did not head her advice.



my thoughts on this:

1) its actually easier since u have a contract and her IC. all on ur side.

faster read the contract and see what it says. does it states that she must start work 10 days after delivery.



2) she is a very popular CL, she would have arrange her next job to start at wk 44(1 mth job). cos she must assume u are delivering at wk40 full term.

but now u deliver at wk 34, u are requesting her to start at wk36-38. her duty will end at wk 40-42.

there is no way she can accept another job from wk42-wk44



3) i support diana advise. small claim or even go to the police to report a case of cheating. also check with case can they help or not.



4) i know its tiring now and u may just wan to leave it and concentrate on ur 2 darlings. but its 1k lei, u can do a lot of things with it.

ask ur hubby and friends to help also.

can get ur friends to read, get more advise.



do keep us updated on the progress.

 

[september]

Poko,



I tink u can. Coz u hv placed a deposit for her services. and later it is she who do not wan to come and render her service. In any biz contract, the desposit is only forefited if the buyer break the contract and reject the service. but in this case she as a seller, take deposit and then later reject providing a service. I do tink u hv a ground to claim it back from her.





also wif her unreason demand on asking u to discharge ur twin all these can really bring her to court. coz if u really did as u told, then ur twin life could be threatening.

 

[poko1]

Thank u choco and diana!!!



I will find the "contract" and ask my friends to read if there is a clause to the 10 day start work thingy. I think it does not have as the last call i made last week when 1 asked back for half of the 1k, she said that she will do her contract once again so that in future other mummys to be will not ask back the money again if such a situation arises.



I dont know if i have the winning case or not. Cos she wanted to start at day 10, when my babes in hospital. She said that she can take care of me first but i said wait a while for babes to be back. I didnt need her to take care of me at that point as i was running up and down the hospital so she will have nothing to do when i am not in.



As she said that she cannot wait, and i dont want her to start taking care of me instead, i had to make a choice to tell her start or dont start. I said since she cant wait any longer, then we had to forget this whole confinement thing.



I had to make this choice as i really wanted her to wait for a few more days, and at that point of time, i was upset, i forgot to ask her back my $$$ immediately. Do i have a case???



Choco, I didnt know there is a space out of 44 weeks for them to accept another job. My only regret is to tell her "HONESTLY" that i have delivered. I should have just kept mum abt it till they are back home, afterall i delivered early.



At that point of last conversations, she said very nasty things too. She even said that if babes do not make it, the deposit cant be returned. Come on, my babes at NICU and she had to say this. Hmm...



She added that she actually wanted to charge me 3.2K instead if 2.8K as my parents are staying with me, and I have no maid. And that I am already very lucky i got a good price from her at 2.8K. sIGH.



Are u all currently preg????

 

[choco_mm]

poko



i dun know u have a case or not lei.



but if she make hell for me, i will do the same to her.

and wow paingz she can even say the babies cannot make it. cannot accept



if the ctt not stated that she have to start 10 days after delivery, then u can argue that at the beginning she din say need to start at 10 days.



but have u make a police report?



keep calling her. tell her she did not perform the job and ctt did not say must start 10 days after delviery.

tell her u will make a police report and see what she say

 

[september]

poko,



we cant tell if u do hv a case. u hv to let the police or lawyer to advise u tat.



if u gng to sue her, u can add on tat she causes u mental stress and nearly led u to post natal depression lor.



another way, is call up media corp tat chinese program 星期二特写 and see if they wan to do your story. believe this will make hell for her le.

 

[poko1]

Thanks for all your advice. My hubb says happened 2 months ago, and to get on wif life lei!!!! He say no time to sleep already how to find time to make police report/small claims!!! LOL!!!



The twins r really keeping us busy, but i still would like to see how i can get my $$$$ back! The confinement lady is 63 yrs old so i can imagine that she will give a pittance face to the police!

 

[choco_mm]

poko



if ur hb think ok and can afford it, then let it be lor.

just treat it as 'bo chai xiao zai'

 

[hurtdeeply]

horrible to meet such CL.....

 

[mamad]

wat a horrible CL...wat is her name? warn all MTBs about such unkind old hag!

 

[twins_mama]

Poko,



Actually at d initial stage, if u don't need her to take care of u b4 bbs r back, n u delivered 6wks earlier, u donnit to call her until ur bb is ready to b back home.



I gv birth to my prem twins in 2005 at 29wks, n we called a confinement nanny last min. N d whole of her assignment was juz to take care of me n wash my BBs clothes (both new & old wch given by my relatives) to get everything well-prep. Then when my BBs r bck (6 wks & 8wks later), we can use d things immediately, n i hv good health to take care of them. It's just a regret for her tt she got no chance to see my BBs cos her assignment completed b4 they were back.



Anyway, I think ur this horrible CL is a BIG LIER!! It is very very common for twins to be delivered early, don even mention triplets! N she can tell u she usually take care of twins & triplets only??!! N how can she said those hush curse????



I think u all shd go to d police, don let other new mothers b harm. Juz go to police station n make a report, saying tt she's trying to cheat ur $$, d rest leave it to d police. (Tell them u r busy to take care of d twins, ask them to help.)



My another bb EDD is around CNY, busy looking for CL now... n CNY period make me worried... grrr...

 

[poko1]

Thanks Twinsmama,



So yr twins shd be around 4 yrs old now??? Are they fraternal??? Mine is - a boy and gal. How did u manage to go thru the early months after their birth?? I am pretty sleepless!!!!



I didnt do confinement (as in the story) so I actually feel my body aching sometimes. Dunno if its bcos I didnt "pu" or didnt rest well.



I did not feel this way at all when my first son was born (and had a confinement lady taking care of us).



I wanted to go to complain to either CASE or police but ah ya.....never got abt doing it. Besides she is 63 yrs old, i tot forget it la. Later she come out wif 101 excuses and give a pittiful face to whoever I am complaining to.



I did not want her to take care of me rite after i delivered as I spent half my time in hospital. My things were all washed and prepared so really its just caring for me. But I wanted her to take care of the bbs more than anything else as my first born already 7 yrs old...i kindda forgot everything already.



Anyway, wish u all the best in yr preg!!!

 

[jodi_wong]

Would like to warn everyone of this confinement lady known as Ah Xiang from Malaysia, KL (HP: 60163822273).



(sorry for the long winded post) My situation as follows: I gave birth on this new year and informed this CL known as Ah Xiang (Freelance - $2000) that i would need her to come down to my place on the 17th Feb. She then told me that there are no land transport and need to fly over. As such, i have no choice but to pay for her air flight. She requested for big ang pow as it was CNY, as such i decided to give her $200 ang pow upon her arrival. When she started work, she claim to me that she is very sought after and that she has even traveled to overseas such as London, Japan and etc to work as a CL. After hearing all these, i myself feel impressed with her resume.



However little did i realize that she is actually a very lazy and stubborn person. When she cook, she just cook simple confinement food without cooking separately for my husband and expect my husband to eat the confinement food with me which can be very heaty. she just do simple mopping in my kitchen occasionally and does not even bother to clean our toilets including the common toilet that she has been using. Most of the time, she will just sit down on my sofa and watch TV. Sometimes when i am watching my own TV programme, she would request me to change to her favourite channel instead!



Then after the third day, she started coughing and claim that it must be my husband who spread her the coughing after she heard from my husband that he just recovered from a cough recently. When i asked her to wear a mask, she show me the super black face and dun care attitude. As such, i decided to look after the baby on our own instead of depending on her. She would also often touch my newborn baby head even after repeated telling of her not to do so as my baby head skull is still soft.



On the 10th day, she suddenly claim she is not feeling very well and will stop work immediately and go back home. She demanded my husband to pay her half a month salary and a big ang pow. After negotiation, we decided to give her 10 days of working salary plus a $10 ang pow given that she has not really done anything much and leave us stranded without a CL out of the blue. She took our money without hesitation and still has the cheek to complain that she has never ever seen such a small ang pow in her life.



After she left, i realized that she has taken expensive medical herbs from us and even our blanket provided to her. Sigh....Luckily, i have my mother to help me out otherwise my husband and i would not know what to do.

 

[mummyx]

OMG! Can you PM me her name? I recently dealt with one also with the name of "L" in Yishun! Please expose her identity!!!!!!!!

 

[jen73]

Blacklist Confinement Nanny - PAY SIEW HUAY

Please do NOT hire this confinement nanny named PAY SIEW HUAY (Siew Wah) from malaysia. She has a bad attitude, rude, lazy and is very rough with the baby. Totally unprofessional and not properly trained. Being in confinement, I've fallen sick several times and had diarrhoea 3 times. Had terrible engorgement due to her untrained advice on breastfeeding. Her method of looking after baby and mother is just not right and not in today's context, too much myth and etc. Messed up my whole house and kitchen is so dirty, she doesn't clean up after cooking. Unhygienic with food and etc. She has done uncountable unprofessional, harmful and horrible things. She also use and feed certain chinese medication on the baby without my permission and knowledge. Here are just a few things I am mentioning, but there're so much more to what she has done that is unbelievable and totally uncalled for. To cut the whole story short, please just do not take this risk to hire her or you'll regret and have the most stressful confinement month with sleepless nights worrying about the baby and yourself as I had this extremely bad experience with her and I'll definitely not hire her for my next baby in future.

 

[chelz_mum]

beware of aunt SHU HUA from TANJUNG PINANG Indonesia. Infront of you, she seemslike a hardworking, good personality, etc etc...



Initially i was very happy with her working attitude but i did not know all these are only fake attitude!

i even tried to post good comments on forum for her & tried to help her to get new customer.



Who knows at my back she bad mouthing me. At my back she said:



1) HER PREVIOUS EMPLOYER ALWAYS BUY HER BREAKFAST EVERYMORNING & MY HUSBAND DID NOT BUY HER ANY BREAKFAST.

I thought we paid confinement lady to serve us & not the other way round.



2) SHE CLAIM SHE REJECTED MY REQUEST FOR HER TO EXTEND ANOTHER 2 WEEKS.

she told my maid she rejected my request to extend another 2 more weeks. By the way, i have NEVER ask her to extend. My mum ask me to extend her for another 2 weeks, I told my mum dont need to. The the CL ask me whether I want to extend her for another 2 weeks, i told her no, thanks. But what she said at my bback is different.



3) SHE EXPECTED 2 ANG PAOS (1 when she arrived & the other one when she depart). I only gave her 1 ang pao when she left which i thought is the standard practice. I gave her S$100. i check with my friends, all only give $20, but i gave her $100. Yet she still complain at my back & expecting 2 ang paos.



4) SALARY

She was complaining about her pay at my side was very low & below the market. AT the first place, she was the one who offer to work for me & ask that amount of pay. Really ridiculous that she licked back her own saliva.



BEWARE! INNOCENT LOOK & HARDWORKING ATTITUDE DOES NOT MEAN SHE WILL NOT BAD MOUTH YOU AT YOUR BACK!!!!

 

[eunice72]

mummies,

beware of this Confinement lady LOO SIEW CHOO from Malaysia. She has a few contact nos.



She practically messed up my recent confinement. Went to her in my 1st tri and she took the booking though she always been emphasising if in the event she cannot make it eg death in family etc, she will get friends to take over.....



We thought should not have such events so frequent so we did not take it to heart. Little did we know she has been acting like an agent and the time she took my booking, she subcontract it to pp she did not even know. And she called me only 1 mth b4 i due so i could not find replavcement. But the recommended lady was lousy. v rough with bb and night time don't wake up to help me esp i had c-section.



what is worse is caught her tasting the soup then use the same spoon to stir the soup!!! And fish porridge for me not cook fully

 

[perfect_moment]

I too want to share my experience with this CL . Auntie Yeo hp: 1511 60167089329 / 91481677.

( A short , pump lady with short curly hair)



I got her contact from this forum . One mummy wrote her good experience but i doubt is true . Maybe is written by Auntie Yeo herself .



During the interview, she appeared to be responsible and experience CL. I placed a deposit with her .

Nightmare started two weeks before my EDD. She called and say she is unable to do my confinement as she have another assignment. She will arranged for another CL to come .

I disagree citing that she have collected my deposit she should do my confinement . She refused to come and left with no choice I agreed for her jie mei to do my confinement .



Her jie mei came and do a lousy confinement. Stole my “ tong cao” and drank my bird nest . Did not cook proper confinement foods. Insist on resting despite baby crying loudly . Ask her to leave one week later .



Please beware of this CL – Auntie Yeo . Do not engage her .