Any advise? To give HP to maid or not?

L

llya

Member
My phil maid worked with us for 1.5 mths. We kept her hp since Day 1. Today, she ask me back her hp. She says she need it for sms. I told her we can let her use SMS, but after that return back to me. But she insists want the hp to be kept with her. And says it will not affect her work.

Her full story was: When she fisrt came here for the first few weeks, she has secretly used my confinement nanny's prepaird card phone to sms and tried calling phillipine. We tracked her down but she denied initially until bo pain then gave up, confessed herself. She even opened my cupboard to search for my agent's file and look thru the documents inside, during her 1st month here. We confronted her and warned her. We initially wanted to change maid.

But after that, her performance gets better and she really does her job well. So we decided nott o change maid liao but Today she ask me for the hp.

Any comments? Should I give?
 


Pls change maid.

She dare to even open your cupboard to search for stuff that is not her. What guarantee in the future she won't do anything funny?

Are you leaving your child with her? If yes, pls pls change this maid.. She cant be trusted.
 
ya totally agree that u should change maid. Itz over the limit liao since she dare to lie n search things in your room. No matter how good is she also no use lor. I didnt let my maid use her hp until she ask for permission to use her hp after she w me for 1mth. Agree to it n only allow her to use b4 she go to bed n told her if i find her tired or affecting her job then will not let her use.
 
Never ever give them a hp. My maid was quite good until she got a hp herself, since den she uses it whenever she thinks no one around but we always catch her.

I think its no use telling them you will confiscate it if it affects their work, cos once you take it away they will feel more upset and work unlikely to improve.

Anyway, that's my experience... we are likely to send ours back soon... hv been tolerating....!
 
In fact, it's quite difficult one.. Mine wif me for about 6 mths then, ask if can have hp..

I said no, but tink lata she got it herself... Until I caught her having it, i kept quiet

but she came to me and confessed... She said she asked my sister-in-law for a used one & she gave one to her...

Anyway, honestly, u dun give her... she'll still be unhappy & will find way to get it.

I tink u should talk to her 1st, make her compromise... not easy but it's the oli way to make her commit.....

Haiz.... Maid's a big headache... My greatest fear is to change maid...
 
i not allowed my maid to hold hp but can understand her loneliness n miss family. slowly she only use once a while n will pass back to me to keep but until now she fully hold her hp with not affect her work. it depends on her personality n only u will know n able to judge if the maid is good or not pah.
 
My maternity is ending soon....that's why I dun want to change maid. Guess I will have to bring her to agent and let the agent talk to her, abt her stealing confinement nanny's hp to use and searching my cupboard and requesting for hp.

getting a good maid is like buying 4D. Depends on luck. Haiz!
 
I think your maid deserves to have a handphone if she does her job, pays for the phone herself and finances her own calls. She is not a slave, she is a helper and employee. She is entitled to have a device that allows her to keep in touch with her friends and family. Treat your helper like family and she will take care of you with loyalty and care. No one is perfect. I can't imagine anyone being so disciplined that they won't answer their personal calls during work hours? State your expectations and limits up front, then you can take action fairly if these are not met. My helper has had her own phone from day one. I even gave her an upgraded model when her phone conked out. I find it very convenient that she has a phone too. It allows me to contact her very easily when we are out and separated.
 
Honestly, you must try to talk more to her when you are still at home now... Honestly, I dun trust agents... If they're gd ones, they'll help... I've met one duuring employment of my 1st maid... After 4 years, she left & my hubby went to get another new agent... Very irresponsible, before payment, everything ok... Payment collected... That's it... Ask u to bear wif everything, dun return your call... Somemore it's a very big agency with so-called case trust... Many branches still...

Mine's 1st one is a one-man show but very reliable & responsible... Even came from his plc in bukit batok to my place in bedok at 5 or 6 times to help consule the maid.... Only that the agency fee is more ex.... But after the 2nd experience, i dare not already... Still remember I actually lost a lot money than to save on the agency fee

I believe in being strict & fierce in the beginning cos when they pass thru the diff stage, u be nice to them, they'll appreciate more. If u are uncomfortable to give her hp, maybe try to state terms with her and explain her that if she can show reliability in terms of wat u expect of her, probably 1 month, then u give her back...

just my opinion... I did tis when my maid wanted off days...
 
It really depends on yr maid's character, ever since my maid got her hp, she started chatting with the maids around my neighbourhood and her work slacked a great deal... Then she learnt to ask for off days as well and threw tantrums and showed us black face when she is unhappy.

2 days back was the limit... she yelled at my father in law and said that she has to do everything while 'mam' (dat's me) is so free upstairs!!! Wah... she now thinks she is on level with us and not her employer anymore! So we have to do work as well... anyway, long story... Don't know why we still 'ren' and give her chance again and again....

Anyway, I believe she learnt all these since she began chatting with other maids so freely...
 
Hi melc,

think your maid also over board, dare to say u free are?

My hubby just spoken to the maid and says we are not going to give her hp cos she will spent alot of her $$ and when she go back phil, she will have no $$. Tell her why spent all $$ on hp. After this, we will bring her back to agent to get scolding. My this agent quite good, that day, first day she here, she got gastric, so 1st day already bring her see Dr and my agent scolded her upside down. I also very pai say. So our point is to let the agent lecture her.
 
amanda
till today we keep very strict abt hanphone and my maid has no problem with it,if needed she goes down to call from public phone to call home and sometimes use my hp but with her card.

the only reason they asking is to call guys. my aunt have very bad experience and just sent the maid back. all because she uses the phone to received dirty sms (all kind of blue remarks)

we even suspect she is seeing the boyfriend when no one at home and also having sex!

so please dont take any chances., no matter how good yr maid work is.,

u hv 2 b strict with them. u get philiphines? maybe u shld change to indo? can recomend a agent and also from my maid aread in central jawa. my maid frankly is very honest., very liable and tolerated my 2 coming 3 yr dd. and even tolerated my bad and tempermental attitude. initially she wanted to leave as i keep shouting but then she change her mind., and even wanted to work for 3 years...

agent only want yr money,.and lazy to do extra work finding another maid etc etc., u c if the more the agent scolding her,the more she is going to bear grudge., r u a stay home mom? dont ever leave yr bb with her.

take care
 
strongly not recommend
coz they can act to work very well in front of u
juz to gain ur trust to let them hv the things they want
sooner they might reveal their true color
or act again
 
for my maid, she brought her hp when she came. the agent took away and told her that it'll be kept by me for 2 years. they specifically told her no hp. then after i bring her back home, she spoke to me asking if she can use her hp. i question why she needs it. she says to keep in contact with her family. so i laid down these rules to her.
1. for the first 3 months, strictly no hp because i want her to concentrate on her work. however, i will buy her aerogrammes to write letter home. they can also reply her to our home add. i did allow her to make 2 calls back home during the period to report she is ok immediately and because her son's b'day.
2. after 3 months, we shall review her work. if good, we allow her to use her hp once a night per week. i will keep the phone after her usage.

the reason for keeping the phone locked is because i wouldn't like to see her using her phone day and night. i've seen maids doing that. how to work? she has been with me for 1.5 years and we practise this. she dare not ask me for her phone except for the once a week arrangement. however, i do let her make extra phone calls during festive season like new year.

it works for me. hope this helps.
 
I did suggest to keep the hp for her after use, but she insist she keep herself. So we say NO.

Afraid she not happy, do something to my baby....I'll be working soon.....so she will take care baby at my aunty's hse.
 
totally agree w amanz

the only real resaon they need the phone so urgently is to call boyfrens & receive lewd messages from these guys !

i used to have 2 maids and had the same thinking as Weester (lwee) .. ie since it is their own money, we should respect them .. afterall they are humans ... and from day 1, I oredi told them they cannot have boyfrens (both are married & kids back home anyway) ... both said "yes mdm, we just want hp only to call home as it is cheaper." But in reality, all they really wanted is to chat men up! 2 months after having hp, they asked for "off days" (cos i think they got a "kick" reading all the lewd messages & wanna meet the guys to do "watever") ....Again thinking that no one person should be working 7days a week, i gave them their off days ..

The truth unfolds before me when both maids "fight" over the same man ! And both are vindictive enough to backstab each other, both told me how the other has been "screwing" men on off days ! And show me sms evidence as proof!

I sacked both maids in the end !

The same thing goes for my frens' maids - all either end up with boyfrens (when they hv husbands & kids at home) ...worse, some screw different men at the same time - they think they are Annabel Chong! My SIL saw naked photos of her maid w a Blangadeshi worker & some photos had the maid wearing my SIL lingerie ....

So if these maids don't even respect themselves in the first place, do not blame the employers for enforcing strict rules (which unfortunately make them seem like the victims; and the employers the "bully").

Til today, there are some employers who are still kept in the dark about such active "nocturnal" activities going on behind their backs..

True - We employ domestic helpers - not slaves - but we also didn't expect to employ whores!

Forget about maids who tell you they miss home - I've met 2 agents who told me many can't wait to "run away from home" due to domestic issues .. and most do not "treasure" their kids like we do. Even my previous 2 maids were telling me how the other maid always tells me she misses her son hence need to call home - but in actual fact, she's calling up the "lover" to check on him - ensuring he is not screwing other women !!!

These days I've enforced strict rules like No Boyfrens , No Hp, No off days ... if you are not happy, then work elsewhere ... Sorry, i've laid down my rules - it was your decision to accept the job - don't blame me for not giving the hp.
 
Hi Ming, Yes. My agent only have 2 salary range for phil maids. Either $350 or $400. But mostly is $400!

Hi DTJ, wow! Interesting stories. That's why I interviewd my maid before employing her. I called all the way to phil to tell her NO HP, NO OFF DAYS. If she come here, she insists, we will send her back. She says ok, that's why we chose her. Who knows come her, steal nanny's hp and search my cupboard, then now ask for HP.

i can't send her off now as I'm going back to work soon....headache!
 
ya same here, called phil to interview thru phone. then they everything also yes madm, can madam. N biodata from agent web photo was so sweet, fair n gal next door. Rch my hse, dark, black face n lies her way thru lor. Sian. Pretend sick lah, homesick lah, faint lah. TCS actress lor. Had enough, sen her bk to agent.
 
Hey Amanda,
you haven't go back to work already have headache. If you don't send her back, you need o take panadol often. its better you have headache now than later.
My maid had her own Hp when she came. We didn't mind as long as work is complete and my kids are taken care off. But sometimes, when she chat till 2am, my blood will boil and will sms her to give her warning. the following day, I will ensure that she does not make a mistake with her work and keep her preoccupied with work so that she is too tired to talk at night.
 
Maimuhan, Ha ha, u very funny....u tired her out but maybe she "tong" for the night continue talking then next day flat again! How?
 
Hi Amanda,

Here's a personal experience to share:

During my change of maid, I had 3 before this maid came(4th), eventually, I had to resigned to take care as the wait was 1 mth plus... Cos I can't tolerate transfer maids & I insist ex-sin but those still in state. For your info, the previous 3 are all phil. last one, I took indo back.

Had problems like hp... blar... blar... Then i reali get angry... So I threw my top and told her straight, no demands from her for 1 yr or unless she can prove to me she's capable in coping... Then I told her, if she's not happy, I'll send her back to indo. Then she's scared, said she rather go back to agent... Then I get it... Maids are not afraid that we send them bk to agents, they r scared to go hm without a single cent... I told her, I've the right to send her back to her country and I will not send her back to agent... Money I've paid already, work permit employer is me and not agent... If she cannot work, listen & follow my rules, I'll send her bk. Even ask her to go pack her bag & pretended to use hp talking to someone to book air-ticket for her to return the next day... I even threaten her tat I get my lawyer in indo to chase her agent in indo to chase for the money that I've paid so next time she'll have a hard time to secure an agent to come out.

She panic... then everything resolved.... Honestly, maybe you can try... Maids are afraid to go bk so early w/o any earnings...

lata on, my maid reali improve... then she got a hp but it's all based on my rules that work and children priority, if finished everything, then can call... Everything still ok but I noe she's scared of me cos I will scold her if things not done...

After the hard period, now she's independent, juz renewed her contract, now her 3rd year....

Since your aunt will be wif your aunt, so still not so bad... Even if you gotta change a maid, there's still someone to watch the maid...

You can do it one... Try my method 1st, if it still dun work, then change... cos your can't be controlled... Somemore, tell her straight tat when she go back, don't ever expect to cum out again cos you'll report to mom about her stealing case & she can forget about coming bk to sin to work cos her permit will not be approved... My ex-agent had shared wif me that if maids steals and we've sent her back, we can write in to mom to inform them of her actions and state it's found out just before they left and also to terminate their work permit... Next tme, their permit will never be approved & they'll not now why... Even if they change names, thumbprint will oso reveal...

Hope this will help u... Last, get an indo (more stupid n slow to learn, but u can control them... cheaper oso) or a myanmar maid since you've an adult ard, heard fm frens that myanmar maid can work & take better care of baby/children...
 
This thread will be moved to Temp Holding Place shortly.
Please continue your discussions there.
Thanks
 
Thanks Sharon, ya, actually I'm bringing her to agent, so me and agent can scold her at one short, then warn her if she don't do well, we'll send her back home. We will tell her employer treat her so nice and she still like that.....ask her to wake up....but honestly speaking, since the day we told her off, she has been good.....


Actually for the past few days or weeks, we are treating her very well, hoping that she gets emotional and change for the better. We buy her children X'mas present and help her post back to Phil. We also help her develop negative films she bought from Phil. I gave her ALOT of clothings and even bought her a new top for CNY.
 
Hi Amanda,

My Phil maid with me close to 2 yrs now, i allowed to have hp since day 1 cos, i can imagine that for them coming here its a change of environment and everything, it would be good if they can maintain contact with their family. We cannot expect them to be totally cut off from all communication with other people. But of cos i do not pay for her hp usage.

Similar to Weester, i find that having hp i can contact her easily and sms her sometimes when i want her to do something and have no time to call.

Since yr maid performance has improved, give her the benefit of doubt and tell her your expectations.

Good luck and i hope she will be someone whom u can trust in the end! Its true there are some "naughty" maids but we should not assume the worst of them if there is no reason to do so.
happy.gif
 
My maid requested to buy hp after 2 mths with us. I do allow her but she has been sms-ing so much recently that my husband strictly told her to stop using it while taking care of my son.

Have not seen her using the hp for long time... Happy with her performance..
 
Same for me, dont give maid hp cos they will learn all kind of tricks and use on u.
I am sending my maid back to agent cos after having hp, she starts to demand for off day. Keep saying her friends have off day and why can't she have it, etc. Enough of her rubbish, can lie and use my house phone to call and chat with her friends & relatives whom working in SG. Angry
 
Hi FL, i ask her to give my mobile number to her husband, should call me if anything urgent, tat is our agreement, when her contract due for renewal she ask for hp again n i decided to change a new maid.
 
When she ask, I say u ask SIR.....when SIR back, he told her give my Hp number to her husband, only can call my hp when Emergency. She also buy her own phone card with her own $$. But its up to her to use. But must ask my permission. Most imptly, they want to sms.....look after baby how to allow them to sms??
 
just to share, the moment u gave them hp will have 2 problem, family from phil called will affect maid's mood to work, friend in sin called will make them feel like going out to have fun, etc..
 
Yeah, you are totally correct, that is the situation that i am facing now. My current maid wanted off day after having hp. So i am in the mid of changing maid. Sian. Lesson learnt!!
 
hi ladies,

i'm getting a trf maid who is ex-spore to care for my bb. i'm sure she will either have her own HP or request for one. do u thk i shd give?

she will be alone w bb when i resume work next mth, so worry that she xiao xiao keep sms or talk on HP till she neglect my son!!!

thot of setting up cctv, but dun know where to put coz my wall has nothing to 'cover up' the cctv as it's very plain white wall w nothing!!!
 
hi kittybride,

if it's possible try not to allow hp because of all cases i heard, they will sure be distracted. Mine requested before but i turned her down giving reasons that she should work hard while she's here to save enough money to bring home which is the main purpose why they come out to work right, no point wasting money on unnecessary money and if she wants to contact anyone we buying her call card to call after working hour. But if she insisted in buying with her own pocket money, I told her i will keep her phone during working hour so she only holding her phone at night and pass back to me in morning. If she is fine with it then can proceed to buy. Lucky after much reasoning my maid find no point to processing a phone.

If there's nothing to hide the cctv then why not let your miad know that you will be watching her, this is to prevent unnecessary incidents than to catch her when she's in the act...if you know what i mean. The same rationale as of why traffic police let us know where they set up speed camera. But of course, the major loophole is that we can't do anything for what she done outside the camera zoom area.
 
Hi Kittybride,

Never give hp to your maid since the more, she's alone w baby.....She will keep sms-ing till baby cry, so will also finish her sms then attend to baby. Ex-spore can very smart and they know their way out! Why in the first palce get a tsf maid? Since its next mth, u still got time to get a new one, abt 2 weeks wait time. I did that too......cos I have the option to choose the maid and also interview her in advance before she come. I already told her no hp, no off day, if she reach her request for any of these, immd we will send her home, she agrees, then she come. At least, she will be more willing to work then u Forcing them not to carry.

Install CCTV obvious enuf to let her know u are watching her. I turn on my CCTV infront of my maid when I want to go out. I leave my baby with her but of cos I dun tell her where I go and I try to come back early.
 
kittybride,

i agree with amanda. ex-spore/experience maid is v smart. my maid is ex-spore. no need to teach much cos she v automatic n know wat to do next but very smart in talking. sometimes i found that she actually lie but i close one eyes cos gonna sack her soon. you may want to consider get a new maid n choose those type from kampong area. althought need time to teach but most of them r tuk tuk n will listen to you.

no hp pls. u may want to promise her to let her call back once a while using your phone means u will pay for them. maybe once or twice a month.
 
I think you need to talk to your maid about using her HP. You can try to come up an agreement with her. Give her conditions. If she does her work well and she won't use it while she still has chores to do, then you will give her HP. But if it gets in the way, you will decide to hire new maid. Just talk it out with her. If it does not work out then I suggest you replace her.
 
I have 2 HP, but I only give to my maid over the weekends when we are out together.

I will put her in the Games Arcade with my son and will call and check on her every 20 minutes or so to ask if my kids are ok.

She is allowed to use my HP to SMS to her family in Indonesia.
 
i have a phil maid n her work is so so only. she loves to chit chat with my SIL and my FIL & MIL dont mind at all !!

of coz she do her work then chit chat but when she chit chat she never find extra things to do when there r so many things to clean.

i regretted not keeping her hp. cause whenever she do her work halfway thro someone call or sms her she will respond to her hp first. i don dare scold her because my in laws never say anything. i scared the maid will treat me n bb badly if i scold her.

wat shld i do? i was thinking change her after 2 yr contract since she is under my name and not my in laws .
 
I found out lately that my maid has a new HP and I question her where she got it, she says her boyfriend gave to her when he visited.

She kept it from me for the past 2 months.

I find HP are the root of problems. First they will received calls from their home (problem 1). If home has problems they cannot concentrate with work. 2ndly they get to know more maids and exchange number then more problem arise cause some maids will pass guys numbers to my maid and ask her to help call the guy to convey messages.

HP is the start of Night mares.
 
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