Advice needed - How to settle financial matters of parents?

annie_annie

New Member
I was born in a "large" family and have 2 other younger siblings at home. Being the eldest, I was always the one who kena all the arrow. Now, first I should clarify that I do not hate my parents but it's not like I'm very close with them either. Being born in the sandwich generation, I didn't get all the financial support / adoration from parents nor do I expect them to do so when I'm young; they were busy spending the money on religious things and their personal vices than on us. I grew up being prudent and saving my salary for future retirement needs / children. My parents have no insurance and recently both of them were diagnosed with high blood pressure during one of those community events. Although my mum say she won't burden us by going to the hospital, when she actually does go, we (the children) will probably be involved in the financial matters.

So is it accurate to say all my hard earned savings will go to waste saving my parents? Are there alternatives to just let them "go" since their time come?

My apologies for creating this account and posting this thread at such a late timing as I just went back to my (rented) apartment after a long night with parents and siblings arguing on the path ahead.
 

johntan68

Member
I was born in a "large" family and have 2 other younger siblings at home. Being the eldest, I was always the one who kena all the arrow. Now, first I should clarify that I do not hate my parents but it's not like I'm very close with them either. Being born in the sandwich generation, I didn't get all the financial support / adoration from parents nor do I expect them to do so when I'm young; they were busy spending the money on religious things and their personal vices than on us. I grew up being prudent and saving my salary for future retirement needs / children. My parents have no insurance and recently both of them were diagnosed with high blood pressure during one of those community events. Although my mum say she won't burden us by going to the hospital, when she actually does go, we (the children) will probably be involved in the financial matters.

So is it accurate to say all my hard earned savings will go to waste saving my parents? Are there alternatives to just let them "go" since their time come?

My apologies for creating this account and posting this thread at such a late timing as I just went back to my (rented) apartment after a long night with parents and siblings arguing on the path ahead.
Hi sis, I can understand you fully. In my family, I have 4 siblings, including myself, 5. My parents have zero financial planning, they will not touch their saving no matter what and rely heavily on the children to support them. Both my parents are old and in our hospital several times a year. I’m the youngest but being the highest earner in the family, I always kena the most and pay the most, family functions, parents Hosiptal bills, their maid etc and etc.
Even my ex also question why I’m always the one paying the most. So I was quite upset actually. A very close friend of mine; she told me that love for our parents cannot be measured by how much i paid. Their love for me is unconditionally and I should reciprocate. I think this knock some sense to me. Ever since, I felt better. Sorry, I don’t have good suggestion but just sharing my experience.
 

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