A hurting new yr eve <IMG SRC="http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif" ALT=":

shiny_star

New Member
Hi mummies,

I am a single mother with a son coming 5 years old this year. I joined the forum since 2006. For past few years I had being bringing up my son alone together with family support. I was not married as previous ex lied to me for 7 years.

I knew a nice guy 1.5 years back. He get along with my son and very nice to my family. I went to his house around 3 times and his parents did not say much about us. I even bring my son along. I was so naive thought they accept us but it was not. I even occasionally buy food for him to pass to them and so happy they don't mind my status.

I was wrong until the new year eve. I was so happy that I can finally bring my son to eat reunion dinner with them. My son even knew we are going and I teach him to greet them. My parents and friends are also happy for me. But when we were about to reach his place, he told me that we just go to his house a while. I was surprised and asked him the reason. He said the parents were not ready yet, earlier on they called him and nagged at him. I broke into tears immediately and my son was with us in the car. He knew what's happening but he kept silent.

I was very upset and don't even wish to go his house and face them. I felt unwelcome. I told him that I will go to my grandma place at cck to have reunion dinner with family and relatives. His dad called him and hurried him back. I took my son with me alone and took bus to ang mo kio then waited so long for a cab to cck.I told him to go back and I can go back myself. Along the way, my son asked me why did not go to his house. I was so hurt and cried along the way. Yet the parents of his are enjoying their reunion. How can they hurt me when they should not say ok to come their house when they don't feel happy about it.

I am also human and have feeling. I am very upset and can't bring myself to see them. I even went to buy abalone for them but till now it's still in his car. My bf say he will talk to them into accepting me and say they are elderly must give them time. I understand but they should not have done this to me at the first place. My parents also surprised I did not go.

What a upset eve.
 


be strong for your son!
he is blessed to have u and there is always light at the end of the tunnel!

you will be loved unconditionally one day by someone worthy of your love and care!

take care!
 

gucci_mum

New Member
Hi Joanne, kudos to single mom. It's tough and not easy to look after a child single handed, letalone others thought about you.

You're blessed with a understanding son, believe he grows up strong to be like his mum.

Take care Joanne mummy
 

jamesther

Member
Hi Joanne,

I can understand your hurt. Whatever it is, be strong and live for yourself and your son.

Take care!
 

elisechow

Active Member
joanne, really not easy being a single mum. Jiayou to you! i have friends who got remarried with kids too, and their hubby parents loved them and their kids loads. u will be able to do that too.
 

rainibowbunny

New Member
hi joanne
i am divorced with a five yr old son too.. i understand how it feel when you feel that you are not welcome to that family just give yourself time and your boyfriend time too, if you all through love each other...

if you alrdy try your best to do whatever you can and they still cant accept you, then you must really think are you going to have this kind of life for another few yr unless your boyfrien is willing to move out and marry you

i have a sad story of my side too... but i try to get out of my life becos the person i thought i will remarry left me after a five yr courtship to another woman on feb and he just drop me a bomb...

we are all single parent... we know that is very hard for the parents to accept us... it just take time... ask yourself

how long can you wait for them to accept you ?

how far you see yourself in your relationship even if you are marry?

and is your boyfriend really dont mind or supporting you with this ?



i am very straightward.. becos i really have very bad experience.. for relationship regard mum in law or third party, i hope i dont offend you .. if you really need someone to talk to you can just text me 97717640

jiayou
 

fitti

New Member
It is indeed very tough for single parents, especially so for single mothers due to the social stigma. Although it is nice to meet someone we can relate to and love, it is more important to put our children and selves first. If a man cannot stand up for you in front of his family under such a situation, this man is unlikely to stand up for you and your child/ren in future. One day, you will meet a man who will love and respect you. That will be the man good enough to be your child's father.

Jiayou. =)
 

shiny_star

New Member
Hi fitti,

Thx for the console! I had overcome the barrier and he spoke to his parents about it. His parents can accept and we getting married this coming oct! Finally I can get married cause all along I am not married but have a son. ;)

We as single parent are tougher and must always put kids as our priority!
 

shiny_star

New Member
hey all mummies,

thanks for your post. I am happily married on last sunday 23rd oct and found out that i am pregnant with second child! Remember stay positive and happy, everything will have happy ending...
 

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