(2012/05) May 2012

I agree too Marilyn, hmm, the only reason that will take me back to work is becoz I am doing well at work and I feel working keeps us sane and connected as well..you know what mummies? I went to get a helper on Sunday to take care of my baby..actually really last resort, bo bian one..hopefully this maid is really as good..she is recommended by my friend..finished her contract, worked for 5 yrs with the employer, taking care of baby from newborn to 5 years old..

Only maid and baby at home..wa piang..I pray everything will be ok...getting my mum and my neighbor to pop by whenever possible..

faaa: I will make effort to have a chat with my husband after baby falls asleep, also watch tv together and eat together..guess this is the adapting and transition period, where things are no longer the same as when there were only the two of us..I hope with a good maid, we can go out to the movies again..
 


sardonyx: my baby took it at 2 months old, not much effect cos she already pooing 5-6 times a day. In fact, seems to poo a little bit less? Like 4 times a day only?
 
Taken..no side effects I think.. going to take his next dose this week
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Hi mummies, rotavirus very safe. Normally no side effects.

Ayana - my baby is normally wide awake from 6 to 10pm. Even if she does nap its normally a few mins only.

Littledotty - my hubs and I used to watch tv together but now I try to sleep earlier so I can get at least 2 to 3 hrs of uninterrupted sleep before baby wakes up at abt 4am
 
any mummy putting their baby at infant care? how do you go about selecting the center?

i went to an infant care center and was kinda shocked at what i saw. i was at the center before when most of the babies were sleeping or playing and had very good impression. but today i am surprise to see 1 teacher tending to 5 babies (4 crying and 1 stare blankly at the chaos) when the other is bathing one. Maybe it is the morning blues because the last time i went, it was ard noon and the babies seems happy playing/sleeping

the ratio is actually still within the guideline set by MYCS (1 to 3 vs 1 to 5) but the teachers there seems so overwhelmed when all the babies want attention at the same time...

abit scary to see the tears, mucus all over the kids face.

any mummies put their baby in infant care and is such senario a norm??
 
Hi ginger, I am putting my baby in infant care centre in sept but on flexi program. I went to check out the infant care last week and looks good. Probably becos they know I am going for site visit.
 
ginger: I considered the infant care too, but in the end went for a maid instead..the infant care I wanted has no more place..theirs is 1:3..honestly speaking I think 1:5 is overwhelming..I at home 1:1 already think it's tough work! :p
 
littledotty - my baby will also be taken care by the helper. I am
in the process of changing maid. Hopefully next one will be good and responsible. The current one is a total airhead. The only good thing abt having a helper is they can help with house chores and 1:1 attention to the baby.
 
Marilyn - where can we get fenugreek seeds beside mustafa? Been out the whole of Sunday, baby latch on but seems like my milk supply dropped drastically cos I missed 1 session of pumping. Now I only managed to pump 3x per day
 
Smak, Faaa - U r right. There will be brighter days ahead. When bb turns 5-6mths then can have more family outings etc. Can't wait for Nov/Dec. Btw, Legoland in Msia is open in Sept and there are many 1-day tours. We can consider it as a date with hubby given the strong exchange rates now. Hee!

Freedom - hope u can find the ideal job soon which allows u to spend quality time with family and also a reasonable income
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Ayana - I support u. True at home cannot neglect appearance but too late for me. Still very chubby. Weight stagnant at 70kg. Feeling so lethargic must be disciplined to exercise. How are u planning to maintain?
 
Littledotty, is leaving baby with a maid safe? I am considering this option whn I go work next time but still kind of worried. Is ur maid alone with ur little one? Did u put any cameras? My mil kept advising me not to consider this option and to find a nanny instead.
 
Marilyn - have u considered to latch baby? This brings down the weight faster. When I had my son I only expressed weight hardly go down. Now I latch my baby on at night only but I think weight is going down slowly. But it also depends on how much weight u put on during pregnancy.

Btw mummies, something I learnt this time round. Continue to bind your tummies!! My tummy went down a lot when I had my massage during the first few weeks but somehow pop bk up again. Then the CL told me gotta lose by 3-6 months or it stays with u.
 
Miss freedom - leaving baby with maid is sometimes not by choice. It will be best if there was someone else at home to keep an eye in them for eg. Your parents, mil

Of cos maid must be responsible too. Leaving with maid or placing in infant care both have their pros and cons.

My last maid who took care of my son did a great job but somehow she flew kite and nvr came bk from home leave. And I changed 3 maids since Dec last year and none I feel safe to leave my baby gal with. I'm in the process of changing another and keeping my fingers crossed that she will be good and responsible
 
FAAA, now already 3m, binding still effective? I'm wearing girdle only when I go out, else bottoms can't really button up. I lost preggy weight but arms big, duno is it carry baby.

My baby doesn't like to sit in stroller end up carry him most of the time outside, v siong. At home he needs to be carried n walked around else keep crying. When put to bed also hv to carry. I'm going to collapse with backaches and wrist pain trying to counter his back arching stunts when he tries to protest if I don't walk while carry. I can't sustain this when he grows heavier but hv no other way to calm him since I can't be letting him cry until red if I do not carry n walk. Anyone has tips?

I'm thinking of using baby carrier when go out but hv to carry e diaper bag too. Altogether weight will be quite heavy for a small sized me. Haiz, I can't enjoy going out with baby cos in e end we get so tired carrying him.
 
Anyone can recommend a cheap and good baby carrier? Budget $50? Since i dont think ill be using beyond 6m dobt want to invest in one. Maybe I'll try to use one with stroller standby if I can't take the weight. A bit silly to use both but no choice.
 
Infant care: I'm also putting my baby there. Not sure how true my fren says babies are left crying in their cot to sleep. Heart sank after hearing this. Nobody coax them to sleep. At home they are treated so precious go there like nobody's baby. But no choice, nobody babysit at home. I'm choosing the center nearest to my home although it takes in many infants and ratio not good. But if I go other centres might not be in time to ferry to and fro between work place. Infant care is abt $900/mth after subsidy, so expensive! Though babies sleep most of the one but their fee is highest.
 
Rabbitz - can continue to bind or use girdle. I also only using the Osim binder at night.

For carrying baby, I think u already spoilt your son. Can try not to carry him 1 to 2 times see if he can know that crying hard also no need.

Another alternative to infant care is to look for a nanny. U considered one?
 
Rabbitz, it's true, I got friend working in infant care. Just Imagine , teacher ratio 1 to 5, it's impossible to hush all down, teacher only has a pair of arms. So the little babies have to take q number lo. Even feeding aso the same, hungry aso have to wait, no choice... That friend aso advise me not to put in infant care.
 
My gal has attended infant care for 1 mth now. She's the youngest there, so she does get more attention. And it helps that the center has gd teacher-child ratio at the moment. Roughly ard 1:2. There's 8 teachers and currently abt 16 infants/toddlers. For infants, i feel they do get more attention. I think there's less than 5 kids that are not crawling/walking yet. As for toddlers (can walk already, likely > 1 yr old), sometimes 1 teacher is watching 4 to 5 of them. But this is becoz she's reading books to them, so those that can walk will gather ard her. I recall seeing 1 teacher able to bring > 5 toddlers into the sleeping area and successfully get all to nap. Amazing. Guess the kids are already used to the routine.

I guess we must set realistic expectation so that we will not get too affected. As long as she's drinking well, sleeping well, putting on weight and looks clean when i pick her up, i'm ok.
 
infant care

i went to 2 infant care center both 'govt related' since i stay in in HDB and they are the nearest. I wanted to try the pte ones but kinda far and transport is troublesome.

in both i basically see 1 teacher, surrounded by 3-5 babies. one hand carry usually the youngest, the other hand pat an older one to sleep laying on the floor, mouth coaxing one, eyes look at one playing a bit farther away. :S

at home our little one is like little prince and princesses... over there is like peasant... i am actually ok to let the baby cry abit, but what i cannot tahan is the more demanding toddler's tears and mucus all over my boy when they demand attention. the babies there are usu 6 mth and up, can stand/crawl/walk liao, our babies are still infant, cant even hold up the head properly, very worrying...


carry baby to sleep

my boy used to do that too. but we took to the hard way. we place him in the cot, when he keeps crying for us to carrying him, we pat him, play the mobile, sing songs to distract him and tell him mummy/daddy's hand tired no stength etc... did it a few times, he seems to understand and will go to sleep will minimum fuss as a long as can see our faces.

but after i put my boy at infant care, i very heartpain and began to carry him more :p
 
babysean

that is very good ratio! but issit the total no. of teachers vs infant/toddlers or available teachers at any given time? the center i enrol at the number of teachers is 4 and infant/toddlers is 8, but i think due to shift, in the morning and evening only 2 teachers around. quite scary, especially when they need to attend to the parents dropping off/fetching their babies.
 
Hi Ginger,

Yap, that's the total no. of teachers vs infant/toddlers. From 7am to 10am, there's also only 4 teachers around. I normally drop her off ard 8.30am and pick her up ard 6pm, it's not rowdy when i'm there.

Mine is pte center and it's quite inconvenient by foot. I guess that's the reason y i'm able to secure a place at such short notice. Heehee.

The infant care area is big as compared to the other levels. The playing area is separated into 2 section, so those that can walk or crawl will be playing at another enclosed area. There's also 3 shower/changing stations, which i think consider a lot as i recall mostly has only 1.

Very sad, they are going thru re-tender of their lease. I really hope the center can continue to operate there so that i dun need to make changes. I'm quite happy with them so far.

Me & hb also will carry her more when she gets hm. To compensate her. Heehee. But she does get sick quite often but usually running nose.
 
faaa & miss freedom: like what faaa said, getting a maid to take is really not by choice..actually it is the last resort coz really, at this pt, there is no one to help. I tried to find a nanny near my house but didnt get anyone and put in infant care, I worry about the ratio and the hygiene plus baby can get sick often..it so happened that I was recommended this maid, and I tot fated la, so I took it..honestly I also dunno safe or not! ha, she will only be here in 3 weeks and I have gotten my mother, mil and neighbor to pop by whenever possible to check..I trust that since the maid is experienced in taking care of baby and there is only one baby and two of us in the house, very easy to take care..my hubby didnt want to put camera, so I cross my fingers til then see how..if you ask me based on gut feel and mother instinct, I think this maid not bad la..

rabbitz:I think you spoil the child liao, ha.. I also used to do that, then I realise really cannot, next time go to work who can carry and walk all day..so I slowly put my baby in the cot..first few times put about 10mins and distract him by playing with him, reading to him, give him water..then gradually increase the duration..now he can stay in the cot and watch his mobile, and play at least for 30mins..do it slowly, he will learn..
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I think the best thing about a maid is helping with the housework and sometimes, hubby and I can go out without baby..haa...
 
any reason why baby refuses to drink his milk? for 2 days, he had no appetite though he's not sick. good thing he's back to normal now.
 
Hi sardonyx, some babies go thru milk strike when they are 3-4 months all the way till 6 months. Happened to my son but seems its quite common but worrying as parents.

Littledotty - u r right. If maid is reliable enough, that will allow u to go out with hubby only. But for my current situation, the maid cannot be trusted so I make sure that my hubby or myself will be home if the other needs to leave the house
 
Babysean - care to share name of infant care and location? What's the cost?

If my next maid still hopeless, no choice have to find nanny or infant care.
 
Hi FAAA,

It's Learning Vision @ Republic Polytechnic in Woodlands. Fee after govt subsidy of $600 for working mum is $791. However, they are going through re-contract of their lease. No news yet if they got it.

Yday i juz checked, there's ard 14 infant/toddlers now with 8 teachers.
 
Sardonyx - my elder son went thru the phase for a good 2 months. So if I was going to feed BM, I would pour little and top up. Dun be worried. It's a passing phase
 
Hi mummies,

I've the following to let go:

- BN Playskool busy balls patterns & colours $12
- BN Pigeon breastmilk storage bottles (3pcs) $10
- BN Pigeon S sized teat (standard neck) $2.50
- BN Pigeon M sized teat (wide neck) $3.00
- Tiny Love Musical Mobile $65
- 2 boxes of Tollyjoy napkin liners 200 pcs $10
- 2 tins of NAN 2 400g (exp Oct'12) $20
- Avent twin electronic breast pump full set $350
- Avent refill 10 cups (240ml) $18, with lids $25
- Medela Mini Electric breast pump full set $105
- 2 tins of Mamil Gold 400g (exp Nov'13) $20
- 2 Pigeon pacifier for 8mth+ $7

Kindly WA me @ 9653 0121 if keen/ for pics, thanks!
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sardoyx and FAAA: yah, my gal also suddenly drink very little EBM in the day at nanny's place 2 weeks ago. Drink total of 100ml during day time only. Good thing it only last for 2 days.
 
dolly - do u still latch on your baby? Can I check with u, how many times do u latch/pump per 24hrs? Is it necessary to pump after latching?
 
Faaa: my timing for latch is not fixed, and on non-working days I only latch,dun pump
On work days
6am latch
9am to 7pm : feed 3 or 4 times of 100ml
Pump 930-1000am ard 200ml in 15 min
Pump 345-1630pm ard 200ml in 15 min
830pm -2am latch till sleep
 
So u pump 6 hourly can get 200ml in 15 mins. How long does your bb latch? Normally in the day I pump no latch. Latch from 12 midnight to 10am as and when she likes which is around 3 times but somehow I feel she dun empty the breast. Shd I pump after latch but it's such a hassle.
 
Btw mummies, when u freeze excess milk how much u pack per bag? I normally pack 150ml but dunno when she start drinking that amount
 
Hi mummies, back on forum.. My milk ss suddenly went down drastically after I pumped less and did not empty the breasts.. Now lesser and taking a lot of fenugreek.. I think it's the stress of thoughts of gg back to work.

faaa - I only know of mustafa which sells fenugreek seeds in its original form. GNC sells in capsule form but I used to take them for #1 and found them less effective.

[ Weight Loss ]
Is it true the tummy stays if we don't lose it in 3-6mths? I read somewhere that if we don't lose our pregnancy weight in 6-9mths, it will stay with us. Sigh!! I dragged myself to the SSC gym ytrday, spent 2hrs there and now aching all over. Can't latch bb on anymore - tried ytrday twice - he finds it weird and struggled a lot.

[ Infant Care ]
Better to visit the centre at different times of the day if u really have to place bb there. This will give a realistic view of their situation, caregivers' personalities towards infants. I have been to 2 when I was searching for childcare for #1.
Minus - some infants left in cot to cry, soiled diapers, stare into space. Left alone so long they are quiet, no interaction. One sleep room was dark and the other was bright for the awaken ones to be in. Aircon environment all the time, sick babies are still sent to centre, placed in isolation.
Plus - gym area for older infants to crawl, interact. Separate room for nap. When bb is used to such routines, transit to childcare is a breeze.
 
I have considered Infant care vs Helper vs Nanny.. If really can't find family members to tc of bb.. Just my opinions.. Eventually one has to find a suitable arrangement according to family lifestyle/preference etc..

[infant care]
private operators more accountable, careful with caregiver's qualifications. Ensure bb are well taken care of. Respond to parents' requests. Ex but more assuring.

[helper]
Can help with chores and give couples more time tog. 1:1 ratio for full attention. Have to be responsible for her well being. Lucky if she is capable and loves bb. Else have to take care of another person plus bb. More headaches.

[nanny]
ratio is smaller compared to infant care. 1:3 commonly. Have other kids to play with. Must be able to trust nanny. Cheaper compared to infant care.
May not be qualified and if anything happens to infant, have to accept. May stop service suddenly as no contract is signed unlike infant care, helper.

Hope this helps.
 
Rabbitz - u can try baby slings as they cost less than $50. Pupsilk brand at mothercare is $46. I find baby slings more comfy esp if your bb can support head then he/she can sit on your hips. I find baby carriers put alot of weight on the shoulders, but I may not be wearing mine . My hubby likes the carrier as he says it's more suitable for men.

But not advisable to put young bb in carriers/slings for loperiods. A friend's bb developed unusual shape for the head after he slept a lot in slings. Just take note.
 
Hi Marilyn - now I only pumping 3x per day and when I do pump its like 5 hrs but yielding 140-150ml only. So tot taking Fenugreek seeds might help. I try to latch bb on but she doesn't really empty the breasts.

I am in the midst of changing helper. This one is hopeless, constantly have to watch over her make me do busy. Plus recently my elder son is very emotional, crying over the slightest thing. He refuses to wake up in the morning and my hubs lost his cool a few times and used the cane on him. I myself scolded him real hard last night. Broke my heart to see him weeping and clearing up the mess he created.

Sigh.. So hard to make everything right
 
freezing ebm

i am also freezing ebm @150ml. i am thinking of increasing the amount since my boy is drinking this amt per feed now and by the time the frozen milk is being used 2-3 months from now, his appetite might have increased.

amt of milk drank.

don't know if this is considered milk strike or not. my boy used to drink alot. >1 litre everyday. 7-8 times a day @150ml/feed. since last week, he only drink 6x. my parents are very worried, thinking he might be sick and even came up with the theory that the infant care i put him at is starving him so he stops drinking.

it might be just a coincidence that when i started putting him in infant care his intake drop... because he also drink similar amt at home too, but i dont know...

infant care

honestly if i have a choice, i would want to take care of the baby myself... but i have to return to work, and my mother couldnt take care of him as she is already old and my boy is too heavy for her to carry.

i understand that with 1 person looking after 3-4 infant, my boy wouldnt have the same level of attention and care, but it is really heartpain to put him there...
 
Faaa: what is the prob you are facing w your helper? I thought you are changing to another?

Ginger: would u consider having a helper too?
 
littledotty - I am changing to another helper as the current one dun wish to help plus she constantly tells lies to coverup her mistakes. Plus she doesn't take care of my son well too so I don't feel safe to leave baby gal with her. Furthermore she asked for transfer first. My opinion is nvr try to keep them if they ask to leave.
 
Any mummy here has the same problem as me? My baby girl vomits almost every day. When vomit, it's a lot of vomit, like the whole feed. During the vomit of coz uncomfortable and sometimes she will cry, especially if some of it come out through her nose. But after that she'll be happy again, as though nothing happened. My niece (whom is taken care of by my mum) used to vomit once a day too, and a colleague's son used to vomit after almost every feed, so I thought there's nothing to be worried about, and my girl will probably grow out of it when her system is better able to dispel gas/wind from her body. However, it's really very exhausting (mentally and physically) as we don't know when she's gonna vomit next. Cleaning up afterwards really quite tiring, especially when alone. If hubby is also home not so bad, coz gotta clean her and gotta clean the floor (and whatever furniture that got splashed on).

We've tried burping her very often, putting ointment on her tummy frequently and giving her gripe water every day. Still doesn't work. Can only keep our fingers crossed. Only fortunate thing is that so far she has only vomit outside of our house once, and not very much that time. And we go out quite often.

I don't think she is unwell as this has been the case since she was 4 weeks old, and she's turning 3 months next Tuesday. Brought her to PD before and he checked her tummy, no problem. She's gaining weight and growing bigger, so I really don't know what's wrong.
 
Hi hui yuin what u mentioned earlier applied to my girl as well but she was born premature.

Since ur girl is growing,not to worry if Bb can't finish the milk dun force her as long as there's intake of milk at every feed that shld be fine

My girl is coming 3 yrs in oct growing fine at par with her age

Now my girl eats alot.
 
Faaa - our drop in ss may be due to stress and less pumping. This week I got 150-180ml for 5-6hrs interval which is not good cos bb appetite increasing. I am going to start pumping 3-4 hrs intervals again. Don't fret over the helper. Good that she is gg and hope the next one will be better.

To wake my girl up in the morning, we always 'play games'. We trick her to the kitchen window (then toilet for bath) asking her to see if the neighbourhood kitten is talking its stroll or we'll ask her to hurry so that she can catch a glimpse of our neighbour's kids sch bus.

Think positive. Family life has its ups and downs. Bad stuff just learn lesson and move on. Good stuff keep as sweet memories. Jia you!
 
Hui yuin - does ur girl vomit after a bout of hard crying or right after you feed her the full amount? If she vomits after crying a lot, it's normal and happened to my #1. have to prevent her from crying too long/hard by soothing her. If she vomits right after her feed, you may be giving her too much in one go. Perhaps try to give her half, rest a while then finish up the feed. Also let her rest in recline position for a while before burping to ensure milk has flowed down the throat completely.

To avoid mess, place a huge nappy cloth/muslin cloth around her neck like a bib to absorb any spills.
 


littledotty

a live-in maid will be my very last choice. i am a rather private person hence don't like to have a strange to live in. also, heard too many scary stories about maids. there is no one at home in the day, even if i install a monitoring camera, i can only see things that has already happened. i rather prevent it.
 
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