Recommending our Confinement Nanny

thr33

New Member
Hi all, FTM here with a baby boy that just turned a month old. Our CL is good and therefore we decided to extend her employment period for another two months.

She didn’t solicit me to write this, just wanna share my experience cos I was totally clueless to motherhood.

1. She is honest and knowledgeable. What kind of ingredients can be consumed during which period of time (one week PP, 10 days PP, etc), she knows them all. What food items are cooling or heaty, whether can be consumed, which depends on whether you are breastfeeding, she knows all those too.

2. She is very hygienic, tactful and considerate. She brought her own blanket, two sets of aprons, many breathe-able clothes and two sets of pajamas. She always makes sure her hands and clothes are clean before handling our baby. We live in a one bedroom apartment. She will take into consideration everyone's sleeping and working schedule and plan accordingly as for when to bathe the baby, when she goes to shower and all so our bathroom schedules will not clash.

3. She is a good cook. My hubby is a fussy eater and yet, he loves her luncheon meat fried rice and sio bak and many other dishes. She did our full month red eggs and home celebration meal for us.

4. She makes sure she is healthy in order to take care of baby and me. She could get into the backseat of my two-door coupe without any problem. She never appears/does not complain about tiredness despite being woken by our baby multiple times a night. She never demands any special food items for herself, whatever we have available in the house, (bak chang, bee hoon, bread, muffins, cakes, etc..), she can make any of those a meal for herself.

5. She is meticulous and patient with the baby. She talks to our baby lovingly in the evening everyday holding him. She tells me what is normal with a newborn through her years of experiences, which eased my mind a lot during those early days.

6. She is not gossipy or nosy.

She has taught me a lot of things, yet she is open to new things and willing to discuss and talk with me about what I have read from the internet. She is good with using her phone and has a group of confinement lady friends that she communicates with daily, sharing newborn caring tips and tricks. She is not really interested in watching tv.

Anyone interested can contact her through wechat or whatsapp call/voice message @ +60167951685, Mdm Wong, can address her as Di Jie. Please do take note that she is currently booked until start of May 2018. Or can PM me for more details.

Attached photo of her with my baby boy at the full month event.

Thanks for reading! Enjoy your parenthood!
 

Attachments

  • IMG_0213.jpeg
    IMG_0213.jpeg
    107.1 KB · Views: 312

Hi all, FTM here with a baby boy that just turned a month old. Our CL is good and therefore we decided to extend her employment period for another two months.

She didn’t solicit me to write this, just wanna share my experience cos I was totally clueless to motherhood.

1. She is honest and knowledgeable. What kind of ingredients can be consumed during which period of time (one week PP, 10 days PP, etc), she knows them all. What food items are cooling or heaty, whether can be consumed, which depends on whether you are breastfeeding, she knows all those too.

2. She is very hygienic, tactful and considerate. She brought her own blanket, two sets of aprons, many breathe-able clothes and two sets of pajamas. She always makes sure her hands and clothes are clean before handling our baby. We live in a one bedroom apartment. She will take into consideration everyone's sleeping and working schedule and plan accordingly as for when to bathe the baby, when she goes to shower and all so our bathroom schedules will not clash.

3. She is a good cook. My hubby is a fussy eater and yet, he loves her luncheon meat fried rice and sio bak and many other dishes. She did our full month red eggs and home celebration meal for us.

4. She makes sure she is healthy in order to take care of baby and me. She could get into the backseat of my two-door coupe without any problem. She never appears/does not complain about tiredness despite being woken by our baby multiple times a night. She never demands any special food items for herself, whatever we have available in the house, (bak chang, bee hoon, bread, muffins, cakes, etc..), she can make any of those a meal for herself.

5. She is meticulous and patient with the baby. She talks to our baby lovingly in the evening everyday holding him. She tells me what is normal with a newborn through her years of experiences, which eased my mind a lot during those early days.

6. She is not gossipy or nosy.

She has taught me a lot of things, yet she is open to new things and willing to discuss and talk with me about what I have read from the internet. She is good with using her phone and has a group of confinement lady friends that she communicates with daily, sharing newborn caring tips and tricks. She is not really interested in watching tv.

Anyone interested can contact her through wechat or whatsapp call/voice message @ +60167951685, Mdm Wong, can address her as Di Jie. Please do take note that she is currently booked until start of May 2018. Or can PM me for more details.

Attached photo of her with my baby boy at the full month event.

Thanks for reading! Enjoy your parenthood!

Hi,

I am presently looking for confinement lady. May I enquire more on Mdm Wong from you pls?
 
Hi all, FTM here with a baby boy that just turned a month old. Our CL is good and therefore we decided to extend her employment period for another two months.

She didn’t solicit me to write this, just wanna share my experience cos I was totally clueless to motherhood.

1. She is honest and knowledgeable. What kind of ingredients can be consumed during which period of time (one week PP, 10 days PP, etc), she knows them all. What food items are cooling or heaty, whether can be consumed, which depends on whether you are breastfeeding, she knows all those too.

2. She is very hygienic, tactful and considerate. She brought her own blanket, two sets of aprons, many breathe-able clothes and two sets of pajamas. She always makes sure her hands and clothes are clean before handling our baby. We live in a one bedroom apartment. She will take into consideration everyone's sleeping and working schedule and plan accordingly as for when to bathe the baby, when she goes to shower and all so our bathroom schedules will not clash.

3. She is a good cook. My hubby is a fussy eater and yet, he loves her luncheon meat fried rice and sio bak and many other dishes. She did our full month red eggs and home celebration meal for us.

4. She makes sure she is healthy in order to take care of baby and me. She could get into the backseat of my two-door coupe without any problem. She never appears/does not complain about tiredness despite being woken by our baby multiple times a night. She never demands any special food items for herself, whatever we have available in the house, (bak chang, bee hoon, bread, muffins, cakes, etc..), she can make any of those a meal for herself.

5. She is meticulous and patient with the baby. She talks to our baby lovingly in the evening everyday holding him. She tells me what is normal with a newborn through her years of experiences, which eased my mind a lot during those early days.

6. She is not gossipy or nosy.

She has taught me a lot of things, yet she is open to new things and willing to discuss and talk with me about what I have read from the internet. She is good with using her phone and has a group of confinement lady friends that she communicates with daily, sharing newborn caring tips and tricks. She is not really interested in watching tv.

Anyone interested can contact her through wechat or whatsapp call/voice message @ +60167951685, Mdm Wong, can address her as Di Jie. Please do take note that she is currently booked until start of May 2018. Or can PM me for more details.

Attached photo of her with my baby boy at the full month event.

Thanks for reading! Enjoy your parenthood!
Will she help with the house work?
 
Is she pro breastfeeding?

Hi all, FTM here with a baby boy that just turned a month old. Our CL is good and therefore we decided to extend her employment period for another two months.

She didn’t solicit me to write this, just wanna share my experience cos I was totally clueless to motherhood.

1. She is honest and knowledgeable. What kind of ingredients can be consumed during which period of time (one week PP, 10 days PP, etc), she knows them all. What food items are cooling or heaty, whether can be consumed, which depends on whether you are breastfeeding, she knows all those too.

2. She is very hygienic, tactful and considerate. She brought her own blanket, two sets of aprons, many breathe-able clothes and two sets of pajamas. She always makes sure her hands and clothes are clean before handling our baby. We live in a one bedroom apartment. She will take into consideration everyone's sleeping and working schedule and plan accordingly as for when to bathe the baby, when she goes to shower and all so our bathroom schedules will not clash.

3. She is a good cook. My hubby is a fussy eater and yet, he loves her luncheon meat fried rice and sio bak and many other dishes. She did our full month red eggs and home celebration meal for us.

4. She makes sure she is healthy in order to take care of baby and me. She could get into the backseat of my two-door coupe without any problem. She never appears/does not complain about tiredness despite being woken by our baby multiple times a night. She never demands any special food items for herself, whatever we have available in the house, (bak chang, bee hoon, bread, muffins, cakes, etc..), she can make any of those a meal for herself.

5. She is meticulous and patient with the baby. She talks to our baby lovingly in the evening everyday holding him. She tells me what is normal with a newborn through her years of experiences, which eased my mind a lot during those early days.

6. She is not gossipy or nosy.

She has taught me a lot of things, yet she is open to new things and willing to discuss and talk with me about what I have read from the internet. She is good with using her phone and has a group of confinement lady friends that she communicates with daily, sharing newborn caring tips and tricks. She is not really interested in watching tv.

Anyone interested can contact her through wechat or whatsapp call/voice message @ +60167951685, Mdm Wong, can address her as Di Jie. Please do take note that she is currently booked until start of May 2018. Or can PM me for more details.

Attached photo of her with my baby boy at the full month event.

Thanks for reading! Enjoy your parenthood!
 
Hi all, just to share our review of Mdm Wong. Everyone’s experience is different, so take our review with a pinch of salt.

TLDR: Noone will love your kid as much as yourself. So, trust your instincts (yes, even FTMs). Also, be clear about the duties your CL has to carry out prior to engaging her. Keep a feeding log!

We engaged Mdm Wong based on the recommendation in this forum and also a mummies group. Being a FTM, our friends suggested that we engage a CL for 2 months, instead of the usual 1 month. Our son was born 2 weeks early, while Mdm Wong was still engaged with another family. Mdm Wong joined us on Day 11. We were grateful that she sought out her cousin to help cover the overlapping period, otherwise, we would have been left without any CL. This review will not cover her cousin’s services.

First impressions

When we first saw Mdm Wong, we were very heartened as she seemed very experienced, mild mannered and capable. She is also very familiar with Singapore, and she did not require us to pick her up upon arrival. She also knows where to get the herbs required for confinement (Albert Complex) and on one occasion, she made her own way back to our place after we did a round of herb shopping.

As mentioned in the review above, she was also very knowledgeable about the types of food that mums should and should not eat. Her cooking was good, and we appreciated the fact that she did not force you to eat food which you do not like. She also does not insist you buy any ingredients or that you should do so on the same day. She will improvise with whatever ingredients are on hand as best as she can. Just for info, on her end, she does not usually eat lunch. Instead, she will eat bread / biscuits which you will have to provide for her in the morning.

Mdm Wong does not force you to do things that you want (e.g. showering etc), but she will advise on what is good and what is not. She does not demand for much – no TV time, no requests for specific food, etc. She did not even want to sleep on the sofa bed we bought for her. She prefers to sleep on the floor. In these aspects, Mdm Wong excels.

CL’s duties

One issue which we could have handled better was to establish clearly the duties Mdm Wong had to carry out, prior to her engagement. As we have a maid at home, there were often times a blurring of division of duties. On a day to day basis, we usually care for our son from morning to about 11pm (later on, this became about 8-9pm as we were trying to establish a nighttime routine for our son). During the day, we will sometimes request Mdm Wong to assist with diaper changes, unless she is asleep. Bath times & wiping down were done by Mdm Wong.

In terms of cooking, our maid prepared the ingredients for cooking, and also did the washing up almost all the time. Mdm Wong only did the cooking. She volunteered to cook for our family / friends on 3 – 4 occasions and even suggested dishes she could prepare. However, we understand that she was not too pleased about this as she said she usually only cooks for the mummy (even the husbands go out to eat, according to her). We now understand that this differs from one CL to another, so please make clear before engaging one.

Baby’s laundry was also done by our maid (not sure what the practice is, heard from some of our friends that their CLs did the baby’s laundry).

In short, Mdm Wong’s duties were largely reserved for night times.

Phone usage

Mdm Wong was quite often on her phone. We were ok with this, as long as it did not interfere with her work. When messaging, she uses voice recording. Initially, she did this softly. This changed later on which we will elaborate upon below.

Treatment of baby

She no doubt has an abundance of experience with babies. However, we found that the problem with this is that she applied a one size fits all approach to our baby. She often says that all babies are the same when we tried to raise our concerns. One issue which were extremely upset about is this. Whenever our son cries, her solution is to feed him. In other words, cry = hungry = feed. We tried explaining to her that him crying may not be due to him being hungry. To explain, our son gets a lot of gas after feeds. Hence, we were told during our various PD visits that after burping, we have to hold our son upright for at least 30 minutes. If this is not done, our son is uncomfortable and cries. The telltale signs for him are crying whilst arching his back because he takes a while to properly let out the burps. We relayed this to Mdm Wong.

When he was about 2-3 weeks old, she suggested increasing his feeds to 100ml every 3 hours (from 70-80ml a week before) as she said he’s always crying even after a feed, which she says is due to him still being hungry. Again, as clueless first-time parents, we said ok.

Immediately after, we noticed that our son regurgitated after every meal. Again, she said that this was normal, and every baby is like that. We sensed something was wrong, as it should not be happening at such a frequency. One morning, we looked at the feeding log from the night before, and was extremely alarmed. The feeding log was like this: 4am (110ml); 5am (60ml); 6.10am (90ml). This meant 260ml in a period of about 2 hours! It just happened that we had a PD visit that morning. Upon checking with our PD, the PD confirmed that there was overfeeding, and that our son was growing way too fast in such a short period of time (he gained 1+ kg in 1 week or so).

As we left the PD, our fear intensified as we noticed that our son had coughed out a pinkish (blood streaks) / yellowish mucus discharge. We rushed to find another PD (our PD was off for lunch) and the second PD also confirmed that it was likely due to the violent regurgitation due to overfeeding and insufficient burping.

Frustrated, we showed Mdm Wong the photo we took of the discharge so that she won’t say that “it’s normal”.

She asked what she should then do, if our son cries at night, since we do not want her to feed him at every cry. Following that, Mdm Wong would pass back our son in the middle of the night to us, as she was not able to calm him down. On several occasions, we found that he calmed down just by us holding him upright a little longer.

Things changed

About 1 month into the job, she was approached for a new job in Aussie. This was when we noticed her behavior changing for the worse. Mdm Wong became distracted because of the issues she had to settle for her new job. She asked for help regarding exchange rates which we obliged. Her phone calls / voice recording became intensified / much louder. We saw our maid carrying our son more often instead of Mdm Wong (sometimes, Mdm Wong will be taking naps). She became more impatient in the way she handled our son, especially when he cried. Through the CCTV, we saw that she became rough in handling our son. Again, we had to remind her to hold our son up longer, as we noticed that the whole feeding (which usually takes 10 mins) + burping + putting our son into bed took a grand total of 15 – 20 mins. To be fair, she did try, at least for a few days after the bloody phlegm incident, to hold our son up a while longer after burping.

The last straw came when we asked her to cook lunch for us, and we found out that she had instructed our maid to cook for us instead. She, however, told us that our maid wanted to cook.

In light of all that has happened, we decided to ask her to leave on that day, about 2 – 3 weeks earlier than we had initially planned. Understandably, she was upset having being asked to leave. To her credit, she agreed to leave on that day. That ended our roller coaster journey with having a CL in our midst.

Mdm Wong was certainly very helpful during the initial stages, as we were completely overwhelmed and clueless to parenthood. She was always willing to share her experience and provided her advice. She also did not engage in naggy or gossipy behavior, which we really appreciated. After she left, we learnt from our helper that she behaved differently in front of us on several occasions, and was not entirely truthful to us, for eg, about the amount of time she burped our child.


All in all, we are glad that we played a proactive role in taking care of our son. Otherwise, we would have been at a total loss when she left. So, to first time parents out there, please trust your instincts and don’t be afraid to voice your concerns. Experience does not always trump parents’ intuition and no one would care more about your child than yourselves.
 

Back
Top