Support group - Miscarriages

Hi Bluberi:
We are the ones worry because it is our bodies that house the baby. The men worry their sperm not up to the job or cannot perform. LOL. My friends also say don't keep worrying, why not take a holiday and take your mind off. I keep worrying it could be my body is too weak.

Dolphi:
I am still having some spotting today and I had D&C on Monday 2 days also.

Shannen:
I was nervous but you will only remember being wheeled into the threatre and then shifting to the operating bed and my doctor injecting the anesthetic. He used a small needle to inject. SHould be okay one dun be scared.
 


Hi lynn,
ya it was necessary in my case as I feel itchy, and my gynae did a pap smear on me and discovered really got yeast..
 
Wah this thread like go very slowly hor.
Hi Shannon: How was your D&C? You doing okay resting at home? I also at home resting.
 
Bluberi,i totally share the same sentiments as you. I thought i going crazy..so lucky got this thread which is a really good support for me. Did u went for ur follow up session with ur gynae after ur first menses? My gynae wans to see me after my first menses is cleared wor so wondering wats this session will be abt? Would u have any idea?
 
hi ladies..i did not drop by this thread for a while..been very busy at work. sorry to hear that so many people are going through pregnancy loss.

i just had lunch with a friend, whose wife just gave birth to a baby boy 8 years after the first boy. in between, they had a few failed pregnancies. he told me to never give up. it just gives me a glimmer of hope to hear that.

cheers to all.
 
hi all...
happy.gif


hey redqueen, yup I had my D/C on wed afternoon. Thankfully, the operation wasnt as scary as I tot. I am doing fine. BUt keep having mild bleeding, this is normal rite? How long will it last?

and are we suppose to go back to gynea after 2 weeks? I couldnt rember my gynea instructions liao. Tat day he so busy, he got 3 cases of d/c to do, including mine. But he's v assuring, keep pressing gently on my shoulders n assure me it's fine n don worrie.
happy.gif


The menses will typically return after a mth?

Btw, i took up confinement food from New baby for a week, the food is not bad, not to oily but soup is a bit bland.

hope u r are very fine too
happy.gif
 
but i getting scare of 1 thing.last nite my hubby told me his colic oso same case as me,cant find fetus but only waterbag in the womb, but her fetus was actually found in her fallopian tube after her gyne keep searching n thankfully found it n was removed properly.

I am wondering if i like the case or nt, wat if my fetus is still somewhere there n nt properly removed? do u think this is possible?
 
Hi

I like to know if most of hte ladies who take the Cyototec pills before the D&C will feel stomach cramps, pains, bleeding etc side effects

Thanks
 
erh. each time i take got different effects. LOL. 1st time there was bleeding. 2nd time, everything was okay. 3rd time got cramps and spotting. all before the d&c.

anyone of you, the days you have menses become shorter after D&C?
 
Hi Jo:
I had stomach clamps but no spotting or bleeding before the D&C.

Hi all:
After the D&C on Monday, up to now I still have some bleeding and clamps ler. It is 5 days liao. My appointment with gynae on coming Monday. I feel uncomfortable with bleeding and then still have to do scan, Awful to doctor right? hiaz........

Hi Shannon:
You mention that case of "fetus was actually found in her fallopian tube" is ectopic pregnancy. The doctor should have diagnosed properly lor.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ectopic_pregnancy
If you no pain no bleeding most probably don't have right?...
 
Hi JTML, spotting will be lesser by the time u visit ur gynae. Dun worry.

Hi Shannon, mild bleeding is fine so dun worry. gynae will usually see u 1 wk after D&C to check and ensure that the womb is cleared n no infection. take care and keep ur body "warm".
 
hi ladies:

Anyone feel want to start trying after the miscarriage? My friends all say can try again but I dun feel up to it. The stomach clamp is making me feel cranky and iritated. My DH dun let me go out. Stay at home is like jail like that. Today finally go out for dinner. Then walk to food court 15 mins very X2 slow walk and walk back feel tired liao...Many ppl over take us like very impatient. Last time, I remmeber I very impatient at those ppl walk slowly one...
 
hi optimus, redqueen, dolphy, lovinglife, paradox, shannen and all, it's been some time since i came here...

after d&c, i had slight bleeding on 2nd day followed by cramps on the 3rd day...and 4 and 5th days, the cramps got worse and when i go to toilet, i feel aching pain in the womb too and sometimes at the vagina area..i cannot force it out at all..feeling is like i'm having UTI...but same feeling when i do big business...my friend said it could be an infection...and i called gynae she says could be but asked if i was still bleeding, i said yes..she said it's normal and ask me to monitor further, if too pain, come back to her for stronger painkillers...anyway will go back next week or so to see her...

dolphy, it's true doc didn't give me mc at all coz i did the d&c on friday, she said i had fri, sat and sun to rest...think she only thought of health wise..but not the emotional part...but i went back on monday to get mc and she gave me 2 days more only...she said usually rest 5 days should be enough...coz no complications...

JTML, although i earlier said after resetting, to try again..same like you, i dun feel up to it...it's like there is something that keeps me worrying....afraid that the same thing will happen again...and i am just so tired of it...haha rather jiatlat to feel this way after 1st failure...anyway when are we able to have sex again after d&c, that is not talk about trying again for baby..

i feel it's good to go out..walk slowly ... like me...coz i got sharp pain in the abdomens at times...doc says it's normal the uterus is closing back...not sure if this is the case...just listen lor... and i got to sit down to rest a few times too....but it's good to be outside rather than cooping up in the house...

how are you all feeling now after the d&c? is everything normal as before? i feel weaker...and tired...and pain at times...really afraid getting an infection and that it might affect my chance of getting pregnant again...
 
Hi Fairie:
Ya lor I feel more tired and weak. Are you having constipation?? If not then you better monitor ler.

I cannot walk fast fast, last time I carry 5 kg rice no problem, now anything more 1 kg I feel strain. I ask my hubby to move the laundry basket to kitchen so I can move clothing into washing machine lor. When full I cannot handle the load. So now we just use the dryer all the way liao. Waste electricty also no choice. Still slight bleeding lor and pain. My whole tummy also a bit sore ler. I think it is so much clamping until it sore.

I think after bleeding stop and after checkup can have sex right? I am not sure at all. Now the pain make don't want to do anything with hubby. My hubby want to try again but I really scared. But after reading the TTC thread in the "2010 mums" I really feel like trying ler... Jia you okay!! Wait a while to heal emotionally first...
 
Hi Fairie:
You got "bu" or not? Your pain you have to monitor ler. It sounds like UTI but most probably only your gynae will know. My mother cook "ba zhen" soup for me 1 time.

She also buy ginseng and then ask the shop to pound or grind into powder so I can just pour boiling water over it and drink like milo. Dun drink cold drinks, I realise it makes my clamps worst.
 
blurberi, i was like u. that time when i just had D & C, i also worry whether got O, mense coming etc.
dun worry, just relax..it will come de.. i didnt test O postiive afer D & C (when gynae said i will be having O soon) and got panick for a period of time because 2nd cycle mense was quite late.then i do BBT charting, test with O strips to find out whens the O. currently still trying for bb and i hope to hear good news soon *cross finger*
 
redqueen, i got no constipation leh, so i need to really monitor...wondering whether can take medicine for UTI or not...

never really bu alot...mil cook those confinement food for me and bought those sachet hong zao cha ask me to drink, then mother cooked herbal chicken for me...that's all... yes i didn't take cold drinks also...once i drank hot barley outside and i notice my cramp worsen, so for now v liang drinks i dont take..only warm water and this hong zao chao drink...
 
lynn, jia you...will surely have miracle happen to u as long as theres hope!

fairie, urs cramp quite long already? did u check wi ur gynae? for mine, i didnt experience any cramp after D & C ops.

JTML, i try after MC... and currently still trying despite get O positive...
sad.gif
 
hi ladies,

my MIL has me on confinement food diet and i need to do so for 40 days. she said d&c is more harming than giving birth and so now, really must bu the womb so that next pregnanncy will be healthy. let me share the food i had.

1. water even warm water is not allowed. can only drink red dates drink. water will cause water retention and big tummy.
2. all my food except rice are cooked with ginger and XO only. not allowed to have garlic.
3. not allowed to have cereal coz it will result skin to be patchy and rough. only milo is allowed. all biscuits with wheat are also not allowed.
4. 1 week after d&c, can buy herbs from chinese medical hall, telling them specifically for d&c. to brew as tonic soup and must take 7 days in a row.
5. veg such as spinach, kangkong, cabbage, etc are not allowed to take within 4 days. as for fruits, only apples and durians are allowed. apple is neutral fruit n durian is bu fruit.
6. everyday must take chicken essence.
7 must take alot of pig kidneys, pig livers and pig stomach.
8. can only take liang food or liang drink after 40 days.
9. no household chores for 40 days. not allowed to carry anything heavy at all.

now, i'm suffering insomnia. can't seem to be able sleep be it day time or night time. sighzzz... tomorrow will be back to work and dreading it...
sad.gif
 
wah Dolphy good lah, You have a good MIL. She takes good care of you hor. Hmmmm I think I better avoid the food you mentioned. I have been putting garlic in my food like no body business...eh you thinking a lot is it, that why cannot sleep??

Hi Yaya, I'm sure good news knock at your door soon. There are many ppl that say fertility seem to increase after mc or D&C.

I married 2 years liao and this was my first pregnancy and turn out...signz...I am keen to try this if my period start to haywire again...
http://www.pregnancyloss.info/sperm_meets_egg_plan.htm
Then also consider see chinese Sinseh too. My mum say go 1 or 2 weeks later...
 
Hi ladies

I wanna know if anyone have more/heavier bleeding and cramp before D7C, I am scheduled for D7C tomomroow but then over the weekends seems like got mroe bleeding as compared to last week

Was womdering after takinging the cytotec will it be even worse?

Thanks
 
fairie,

My 1st D&C was "worst" than the recent one. I bleed more, feel more weak and feel strain carrying just 2 pairs of pants during shopping. This time round, I take care not to carry heavy stuff and I'm feel pretty much fine, or like normal, after a few days.

Prolly won't TTC again until Nov09 thereabouts after 3 cycles unless my gynae thinks it's fine to be earlier after I go back for checkup this Fri. 3 months is a good period of time to chart cycle and hopefully, menses will be regular. I'm in no big rush and would prefer that I recuperate first b4 trying. As to whether I'm afraid that M/C will happen again, well, you don't retry, you never know. Take heart in that me and other people who have failed pregnancies eventually went on to have healthy babies anyway. So you shldnt worry too much.

Your gynae is female? So sad that she is so not sensitive. My clinic gave me 10 days (standard is 7 days). 2 days for body to heal and the rest is for the emotional part. I asked for extra 2 days cos my MC ended on a Wed and I so hate to have to return to office mid-week.
 
oh dear fairie, hope u are fine... pls take good care n monitor closely.

my gynea oso gv me 2 weeks of hospitalisation leave. my gynea like keen to gv MC one.. tat asked me to go take my blood results in the noon. i told them i pop by during lunchtime as i working n nid their help to put me fast fast coz i nid to rush back...then the clinic assist asked me nid to gv u mc instead?

ya dolphy ya MIL so good... u juz relax yaself n really nurse yaself back.. i broke so many of your MIL's rule. coz aft my d/c, except from mild bleedg n cramps.. i am fine don feel sick so i do everyin as per normal..

redqueen, ya i think i scarring myself oni... gynea nt so sotong one la hor..
i gg to see him on the 31st, i wanan ask him wat did he see when he removed my foetus..wonder can he still rembr
 
ahjo u shd asked your gynea for advise. for my case, having mild bleeding on the day d/c itself, my gynea then asked me to take cytotec later (nearer to my op). but as i observed, i din see more bleeding, still mild for my case.
happy.gif
 
erh, when i told my gynae that i was spotting/bleeding after taking cytotec, she only mentioned that the bleeding is cause the body finally recognised it as a failed pregnancy and starting to expel liao.

Optimus Prime: you got take anything to 'bu' yourself? for me 1st time m/c was the most terrible. I was in bed all the time for about a week after the D&C. 2nd and 3rd one, next day after D&C, i'm up and running and doing my stuff even though i was home for about 14days.

my MIL says after D&C, try not to sit down too much, lie down as much as you can.. if not next time old liao got problems... like backache etc..
 
JTML, ya, my MIL super knowledgeable in confinement stuff so i'm on a super strict diet imposed by her now.

well.. i also feel fine a few days after D&C. but according to TCM, our reproductive organs are super weak now even though we may not feel it. so really must bu to recuperate well.

hmmm.. my gynae asked me to try again after 1 round of menses arrived. he said no need to wait til 3 months later.
 
Lynn,

Didn't really eat anything substantial for "bu". Neither the 1st round of M/C.

shannen,

I think gynae prolly won't see anything. I ask before. It's a mass of blood and tissue. Don't expect to see hands and legs. :p

dolphy,

I guess there's no hard and fast rule. Some say immediate. Some say 1 cycle. Some say 3. Some say 6mths. Is this is your 1st M/C?
 
Hi girls, i posted this at another thread, 2010 April mum, now I gotta join the miscarriage thread haiyo.. =( here it goes,

Thank you all for your concern. I told God to take away this pregnancy if it is not healthy, and take away my pain. If the baby is healthy, I begged him to let it survive, and my hubby and I would love to have the baby. Started seeing fresh blood yesterday night, went to sleep, woke up by abdominal cramp, the cramp lasted for quite some time.. couldn't sleep, lie down, sit, stand, still pain. Then I prayed, God took away my pain at 3am, I fell asleep till this morning. Felt at peace, and I know that my bb has gone, went to the toilet and blood clots came out. Showered, changed, told my hubby that we are going to KK to wash it thoroughly...

I did evacuation. I am blessed with friendly nurses and good gynae, went on GA, it was a short procedure, within one hour I was out from the surgery room, woke up straigt away and my hubby was waiting for me in the ward. I was allowed to discharge once after I passed urine. I am glad that I am home now, feeling quite positive still. and looking forward to my next pregnancy, probably will start trying end of this year!

Miscarriages are very common, we just need to move on, I am very lucky that I discovered it at a very early stage.

To all the girls here, I am really happy for all of you! May God bless you all with a wonderful journey with the little one inside you, may He bring wisdom to all your babies, and most importantly, healthy babies!

I am resuming my piano lesson on tuesday, felt quite bad that I have to cancel lessons tmr. Hubby didn't allow at 1st till I said I promised I will take cab everywhere i go =)

You girls take care k! Will still keep reading this thread, maybe one day I will join again? hehe.. maybe EDD OCT/NOV/DEC 2010 haha!
 
Hi girls, I just had Evacuation yesterday, and Doc said nothing much left already, guessed I have passed out most of the tissue and blood.. After the surgery, I had abdominal cramp, it's due to the contraction of the womb, it's a good sign. My 1st urine came out with blood, but it was clear after that. No cramp, no blood now, I feel as per normal, no fatigue too.

Thank you dolphy for the tips! how to cook the red date drink? My piano student's mum always make that drink for me! never thought that it's gonna be so important in my current situation now.

My Gynae said can try after 3 months, that will be around Christmas time hee..
 
Hi Lynn:
If you want try earlier, can shorten the break from TTC? Maybe can ask your gynae?? Sometimes the wait can make you feel even worst...
 
optimus, ya, my 1st M/C. i guess it depends on the individual gynae on when to start trying again.

today is my first day back at work and i'm so tired. i guess that is a sign of my body telling me that i'm still weak and need more rest.

shann yheng, good that you are feeling very positive and moving on.

lynn, why you need to wait for about a year?

brewing red dates drink:

boil red dates, dried longan and chinese wolberries (gou qi zi) for about 1 hour over small fire or til u see the red dates quite mashed up. add more water if you want it to be more diluted. for me, i make it very thick so that i can bring to office and mix with hot water to drink.
 
Hi Ladies,
I just had my D&C too last Friday. I concieved thru IVF and after 7 weeks, bb heartbeat could not be detected. Of course I was very upset. I waited for 7 years for this miracle to happen and its gone now.
I am able to accept the reality.
LAst friday before my D&C, i just had some emotional roller coster. I cried when the nurse wheeled me into the OT. It did not make it better when the lady before me gave birth. The baby cries could be hear...
sad.gif
But now, I am ready to move on. I just hope to get pg again soon perhaps in a natural way.

I only bleed on the day itself. The very next day, no more bleeding. I will start work again next week...

To all the ladies..hope we can have our little one soon...
 
Hi Su_yana:
Sorry to hear that... rest well and recover your health. yep we all really really really hope for a little baby soon...but of course I wun forget the lost too...
 
Shann Yheng, dolphy, JTML :
I don't know, that's what gynae adviced. maybe cause i had 3 m/cs in the span of less then 2 yrs ba.
 
Hi Lynn,

Just to share with you...
I had 3 m/cs in about 11mths and I managed to conceive successfully 4 months after my last m/c.
My gal is now 10mths.

I believe the most important thing is that you have to be physically and emotionally ready to try again. Remember to build your health back too. Good luck and take care!
 
Hi Lynn

I did not find out the reason behind the m/cs...
because whatever the result was, I'll still be trying for a baby...
Anyway, mine was blighted ovum twice and loss of bb's heartbeat.
I switched gynae and hospital... felt that a change of 'environment' may bring me better luck...
 
Kiwifruit..thanks for the encouraging note..is this your first kid?

Su_yana...i can totally understand your emotions at the operating area..i remember just cring away (both times) as women around me were giving birth. It does get better with time..so hang in there!
 
hhehehe
ppl cry at different things hor. Today me and my DH was at the gynae for follow up since my D&C 1 week ago. My husband see all the pregnant ladies his face change a bit. I turn to him and say "yeah I know, why they all sucessful but ours did not make it." I just smile and okay. Then the gynae try to tell me ....can try again no worries hope to see us again with good news 2-3 months down the road. I cannot take it just tear in front of them...so pai seh. My husband so shock ...so he asked my gynae if I tear is it because of hormones. Faintzz....
 
no lah... at home nothing to do after my D&C because they dun let me touch water....read all the threads yesterday night...
 
kiwifruit: what's blighted ovum?

JTML: take more rest! and try not to sit down too much.
happy.gif
and yah cannot touch water.
 
at first my family tell me not to, but then I really cannot stand it, I shower warm water once a day but I am excused from house chores. Anyway, I need to do a bit only, I don't want my mum do so many things for me. I think I ki seow, I took out all my scans and start to feel sad, but then I want to cry everything so that when ppl ask me I can don't tear in front of them.
 
can shower, but is shower with herbs. I did that for first 2 times. 3rd time, TCM doc says the weather is hot enough, so its okay for me to shower like normal but don't linger in the bath.
 


HI Lynn:
I really pei fu your courage to go on trying. I hope to hear good news from you one day.
Shann Yheng:
You still so active ha....teach piano lessons and all... Take care yeah...

Today my mum not coming I tell her I brew my soups myself I need to go out and walk walk!!
 
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