Hi Ladies,
so sorry to see so many of us in the same predicament, with or without kids.
yuki,
its fortunate for you to have found the love of your life and move on, dun look back anymore and once you reach the state of indifference, you will not think of him at all.
givingup,
I like you, went through the same cycle 5 times! and my ex admitted that those were the time i found out. there were according to him many many more and he was flaunting to me that last time when he went outside to find one of them every single night, I dun even have a clue. to think that i was so gullible that while i was carrying his child, he could keep his dick his pants. you only have 1 kid, its better if you can focus on your kid and make her life better! my youngest son was only 13 months when he stop coming home. now i am glad that i leave him earlier, because youngest son dun even miss him as he was too young to understand.
rainbowsky,
you will be suprise that i am super broke, but i am still helping him to pay off the money he took from my fren. as my fren is also a mother, she also have her commitment, much as i wish not to pay, and its not my fault, i am obligated as my fren lent him the money on my account, I am paying her like $200 per month to make up the $4k her borrowed, and before this, I have cleared other 6-7 thousands worth of debt he owed in the past 1 year. I seriously dun think its advisable to wait for him to pay back, am not sure what your finances are like. for me, cutting lost and biting the bullet ahead was key. my family say i am stupid, but i the more i do, the more i feel empowered to face him and his family and when i do feel that i dun owe them a bit, they will not have a single hold against me nor the kids.
ballet rina,
there are illegal prostitutes and legal ones. legal ones can stay in SG long term like 1-2 years, during working hours, they have to stay in the brothel, any other time, they are free to roam anywhere. illegal ones are like tourists, they can be anywhere anytime, and therefore you see many in outram, tanjong pagar. my ex bring them to NICE places and be their tou guide,like sentosa, suntec, orchard, MBS, when 1 yr ago, i haven even stepped into MBS, steady bo..? and he didn't even bring the kids to sentosa.
ladies,
a few questions i have also asked myself, why did my ex still look for pros in the marraige? they have low self esteem, my ex was not earning as much as me, not contributing as much as me. every month i will sit him down or sms him what i paid for. they love to be treated like king and loves it when they can shower you with gifts and have a sweet supporting wife who always smile at them. however, when they dun bring home the bread, as a wife you will the right to feel angry, and if you dun say, its juz unhealthy, i opt for open talk, but he withdrew, into his fantasy world, ending up spending more money for variety andshort term thrills, and crawl back to me for passive care. after a while, it became a vicious cycle, they can get away with it once, they try their luck again and again. men move on fast, even on the surface, they regret, but they dun think as much as the women, they dun obsess themselves with the good old days, coz if they do, they will not even risk the lost ofmarriage and kids. simply, they put their needs above yours.
some say sex is an issue, i ask my ex frankly, he say yah he was tired on tapping on my shoulder, frequency is not there, i am always tired. he dun have a choice, but as a matter of fact, i did my best to improve our intimate lives. he admitted and acknowledge, but after getting use to all the various women, he know how EASY it was to get them, and how cheaply you can get them, he's hooked, he told his frens, he's not even bothered by sex at home, as there are many who wish to be at his service. Soit becomes an addiction plus they know many kakis who actually condone and cheer each other on their sexual expedition.
during the past half a year, he was staying with my ex MIL and ex SIL. he finally went into jail last month and prob out in July. My SIL came to visit me, and she was super irritated by him. she mentioned that sometimes he disappear for 3-4 days. then once, he came home with blister and itch on his body. my SIL also checked her computer history, realise he was googling at itch at his privates.then SIL juz asked me: Aren't you glad that he's no longer there? in my heart and head this time, I AM SINCERELY GLAD AND THANKFUL that he is no longer here!!!
press on ladies, we will see the light soon, even if its moving along solo, we will find joy in our little one. up to now, i dun even have enough time with them and my frens.
