Petty husband

I think it really depends on individual couples' comfort zone.

I personally cannot take half half. I prefers he takes care of certain items like utitlities bills and instalments while I take care of household expenses. But that was a long time ago. Now, I have no income everything he pays.

Money is a stressful topic :(
 


Back to the topic of sharing expenses. I guess Its ok to half half but not to the extend of being too calculative, counting to the last cent

It depends on income too if we both earn same, I can say most half half but if he earn 3 or 4x than me...how to half half? Besides I feel like man should foot higher percentage of the household esp pertaining to children.
 
It depends on income too if we both earn same, I can say most half half but if he earn 3 or 4x than me...how to half half? Besides I feel like man should foot higher percentage of the household esp pertaining to children.
Of course if hubby is earning more then he has to pay. Besides, it is husband duty to 养家.
Since not all families are the same, it still depends on the household income and agreement between the couple to pay for what expenses
 
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Of course if hubby is earning more then he has to pay. Besides, it is husband duty to 养家.
Since not all families are the same, it still depends on the household income and agreement between the couple to pay for what expenses

Ya but also depend on the person character too at times but I cant stand people who are calculative esp MAN!
 
I think if both husband and wife work and are earning similar amount, it is ok to share the burden equally? For me, we set aside the same amount every month for paying things like car, utilities, school fees, ballet classes etc. groceries, petrol and dining are usually paid by husband and I pay occasionally coz hubby will say no need and he pays. For holiday expenses, we typically go Dutch for the airtickets, hotels and currency exchange. But any big purchases or dining overseas will be again mostly paid by hubby.

From what u share, petty is a little harsh maybe u can talk to him that females have expenses like facials and skincare products? I told hubby the same thing and he understands so he pays for the most other things
 
Of course if hubby is earning more then he has to pay. Besides, it is husband duty to 养家.
Since not all families are the same, it still depends on the household income and agreement between the couple to pay for what expenses

I think not everything is black and white and as simple as "earning more", even if his salary is numerically higher... A family is not corporate ownership so it's hard to say who puts in how much and so needs to be get that much back. I try to be open in the relationship with money, let the other person know as much about my finances and spending as possible, and focus on what is the best for the children...
 
Hello ladies,
In this modern world especially when we are working moms, the hubbies oso very smart. They will try to have us share share the household burden. I don't mind sharing but every time when it comes to splitting bills, i feel very stressed. My hubby is the stingy type and i think i'm contributing more for the family. For every "claim" from him, it seems that I have to explain what they are and he made me feel like I'm trying to cheat him! So to avoid getting into any argument, I just pay and not claim. even if we go restaurant for dining, i would be the one paying as he feels it wasn't his "wants" to eat in a restaurant. He LOVES hawker centers!

I have a question for you ladies though. My hubby needs a car to move around a lot for his work. It's kind of like he needs a car to help him make money. Do you all think I should share the burden of the loan? For the cars he had driven, I did contribute for the downpayment but should I calculate the monthly installment into our monthly household expenses? He told me he has burden for the road tax, insurance, petrol, maintenance etc. But to me is the car is his tool for money making so should I even get involved? Moreover I contribute to the downpayment. We are not wealthy, just no worries on financial and his income can jolly well pay for eveything. He just want to whine..

We have dogs and I have been paying the medical bills for them which totalled to 5 digits but I didn't claim from him cos to me is it was me whom wanted the dogs so I LL. On kids, maid, insurance we all share 50/50..

Every month I will pay for everything except for the SP bills, then year end I will calculate and claim from him. So whenever it comes to billing time, i will be very sianzzz....... just like submitting year end report to boss! :(

I'm not trying to avoid sharing but just want some thoughts from you ladies.

Have a good weekend!
 
If i were you i wouldnt share the car loan since you are already paying most of the stuff for the family. Keep some money for yourself, who knows you might need it in the future. Since the car is the tool for him to make money, he should pay for it. Ask yourself, if he makes money from the car will he share it with you? Likewise, if you wanna look pretty you need to pay to go to the hair salon, nail salon, facial and massage, will he pay for you? I doubt it since you said he makes you pay for the restaurant bill just because hes not the one who "wants" it.
 
Hello ladies,
In this modern world especially when we are working moms, the hubbies oso very smart. They will try to have us share share the household burden. I don't mind sharing but every time when it comes to splitting bills, i feel very stressed. My hubby is the stingy type and i think i'm contributing more for the family. For every "claim" from him, it seems that I have to explain what they are and he made me feel like I'm trying to cheat him! So to avoid getting into any argument, I just pay and not claim. even if we go restaurant for dining, i would be the one paying as he feels it wasn't his "wants" to eat in a restaurant. He LOVES hawker centers!

I have a question for you ladies though. My hubby needs a car to move around a lot for his work. It's kind of like he needs a car to help him make money. Do you all think I should share the burden of the loan? For the cars he had driven, I did contribute for the downpayment but should I calculate the monthly installment into our monthly household expenses? He told me he has burden for the road tax, insurance, petrol, maintenance etc. But to me is the car is his tool for money making so should I even get involved? Moreover I contribute to the downpayment. We are not wealthy, just no worries on financial and his income can jolly well pay for eveything. He just want to whine..

We have dogs and I have been paying the medical bills for them which totalled to 5 digits but I didn't claim from him cos to me is it was me whom wanted the dogs so I LL. On kids, maid, insurance we all share 50/50..

Every month I will pay for everything except for the SP bills, then year end I will calculate and claim from him. So whenever it comes to billing time, i will be very sianzzz....... just like submitting year end report to boss! :(

I'm not trying to avoid sharing but just want some thoughts from you ladies.

Have a good weekend!

I agree very stress and also not healthy when come to claiming money from him. For such, why not a joint account all black and white easier for u 2. Did u drive his car too or mainly he do the driving and May I check he earns more than u? I not sure is there any agreement on financial issue b/w 2 of us, hence better to sit and talk through if not it will cause stain when come to contributing, sharing claiming etc.
 
Does it also mean that, if the wife earns more than the husband, she should give the husband allowance?

It should work both ways right? We are living in a modern world now.

For me if I earn more I feel we should bear all equally but if he earn more, he should bear most. To me, man should be the sole provider on family issues of coz not all if wife is working.
 
If i were you i wouldnt share the car loan since you are already paying most of the stuff for the family. Keep some money for yourself, who knows you might need it in the future. Since the car is the tool for him to make money, he should pay for it. Ask yourself, if he makes money from the car will he share it with you? Likewise, if you wanna look pretty you need to pay to go to the hair salon, nail salon, facial and massage, will he pay for you? I doubt it since you said he makes you pay for the restaurant bill just because hes not the one who "wants" it.
Yah, true. And I won't ask to share any of his earning.
So far I have never asked him to pay for my anything. Even during child birth, it was deduction from my medisave and the rest he paid the cash. To me is no need to calculate until so exact. As long as don't fight bcos of money. This is the most sensitive issue between a couple.
 
Does it also mean that, if the wife earns more than the husband, she should give the husband allowance?

It should work both ways right? We are living in a modern world now.
Of course won't give husband allowance la. To me is if you want to be the man of the house and be a MCP, then financially the hubby should bear a bigger portion. If not let's 平起平坐.
 
I agree very stress and also not healthy when come to claiming money from him. For such, why not a joint account all black and white easier for u 2. Did u drive his car too or mainly he do the driving and May I check he earns more than u? I not sure is there any agreement on financial issue b/w 2 of us, hence better to sit and talk through if not it will cause stain when come to contributing, sharing claiming etc.
We do have a joint account but the money inside belongs to him and we use it to pay for the SP bills only. He didn't like the idea of joint account and preferred me to do the "claim" way... No I don't drive his car at all as I'm very scared I might scratch his car accidentally. He took care of his car so well to the extend that I'm too pressurized to drive. I think a scratch on his car meant more than a scratch on my face! ha ha ha
In terms of earning, most of the years I earn more. I guess maybe that's why he feels we should split?
We hv been tgt for 20 yrs including 10 yrs of marriage. Never did we have any agreement, he will always tell me "you decide", then when it comes to claim he will "why" and "Wah, so much ah". Last time no children everything so easy. Now with children, hse, maid etc so many things to look after. The figure becomes bigger and bigger...
Every time when I see husbands paying for their wives, I so envious. Not that my hubby sucks, it's just that it made me think these are the 一家之主。 I think I'm too old fashion. LOL My hubby will buy me stuffs once in a blue moon and I'm not the type that ask for stuffs since I buy them myself. But who doesn't want to be pampered right?
Sorry ladies that you have to listen to my whining... I just want to have a feel of other families' arrangement. Every family has their own issue and who know those hubbies I saw paying for their wives only bear a smaller portion of the overall expenses? I only looked at the superficial side.
 
We do have a joint account but the money inside belongs to him and we use it to pay for the SP bills only. He didn't like the idea of joint account and preferred me to do the "claim" way... No I don't drive his car at all as I'm very scared I might scratch his car accidentally. He took care of his car so well to the extend that I'm too pressurized to drive. I think a scratch on his car meant more than a scratch on my face! ha ha ha
In terms of earning, most of the years I earn more. I guess maybe that's why he feels we should split?
We hv been tgt for 20 yrs including 10 yrs of marriage. Never did we have any agreement, he will always tell me "you decide", then when it comes to claim he will "why" and "Wah, so much ah". Last time no children everything so easy. Now with children, hse, maid etc so many things to look after. The figure becomes bigger and bigger...
Every time when I see husbands paying for their wives, I so envious. Not that my hubby sucks, it's just that it made me think these are the 一家之主。 I think I'm too old fashion. LOL My hubby will buy me stuffs once in a blue moon and I'm not the type that ask for stuffs since I buy them myself. But who doesn't want to be pampered right?
Sorry ladies that you have to listen to my whining... I just want to have a feel of other families' arrangement. Every family has their own issue and who know those hubbies I saw paying for their wives only bear a smaller portion of the overall expenses? I only looked at the superficial side.

aiyo ur hub does sound abit like mine...he wont allow me to drive mainly coz he scare I damage his car so if I allowed to one day then I have to bear for the car allowances too! Yes I feel u...not that we want to whine just that I also cannot tahan, when my other half commented that why need to buy this and is it necessary....at times I feel cheap in his eyes as I not worth getting something which I desire and I must use my hard earned money to buy it...he dun shower me with presents on birthday or anniversary and due to that I also dun buy him stuff now. I know from start he not romantic and very practical type...so used to it liao and see it easy if not life will be hard. But when come to family kids' affair I just hope he can be more generous and count every cent. I feel tired when trying to communicate with him when come to financial affair.
 
We do have a joint account but the money inside belongs to him and we use it to pay for the SP bills only. He didn't like the idea of joint account and preferred me to do the "claim" way... No I don't drive his car at all as I'm very scared I might scratch his car accidentally. He took care of his car so well to the extend that I'm too pressurized to drive. I think a scratch on his car meant more than a scratch on my face! ha ha ha
In terms of earning, most of the years I earn more. I guess maybe that's why he feels we should split?
Never did we have any agreement, he will always tell me "you decide", then when it comes to claim he will "why" and "Wah, so much ah". Last time no children everything so easy. Now with children, hse, maid etc so many things to look after. The figure becomes bigger and bigger...
Every time when I see husbands paying for their wives, I so envious. Not that my hubby sucks, it's just that it made me think these are the 一家之主。 I think I'm too old fashion. LOL My hubby will buy me stuffs once in a blue moon and I'm not the type that ask for stuffs since I buy them myself. But who doesn't want to be pampered right?
Sorry ladies that you have to listen to my whining... I just want to have a feel of other families' arrangement. Every family has their own issue and who know those hubbies I saw paying for their wives only bear a smaller portion of the overall expenses? I only looked at the superficial side.

From a guy view reading your post...
I wonder why i sign the paper..hahahaha

1)Wife dun open letter box, so end up all watever i kanna..
2)I also like veh, but also kanna dents here & there..(tis i dun really care much)
3)Guys will ask why is there a need to spent on certains stuffs.
(But when we buy own things, abit more pricy also can...)
4)Dun be envious, "i feel i am almost paying like 95% on the whole expenses" as a guy is Lan Lan, not really due to 一家之主,could be if some expenses are not paid, will cut electricity, card's interest add up etc.. so its LL. I also dun wan to pay for it ah, rather see $..
5)Have to put into each other perspective to tink, think on the whole pic den into details, why the person will do that etc.

From reading some replys...

Mayb i conclude my wife no good..LOL

Almost all stuffs she buy from vegetable to pads to bra, use credit card, bill come throw give me.
Born child i pay, maid i pay, levy i pay, watever i can think of now also is i pay...

Mayb this is due to too 随便 or last time my father also same...

Sigh....
 
My own perspective- living in Singapore is hard.
We barely make enough to support the family. To support the whole family of BASIC needs are the legacy of husband unfortunately...women are too detailed to look into every needs into a family. We just need to balance. Receiving mails of BILLS instead of love letters is no joke. I can fully understand that. Sometimes I think if the situation is switched around.... the miser will be in the Womencos we are more detailed
 
I have a colleague who go Dutch with her husband in everything.from wedding to household expenses.she also need to be responsible for the household chores.once she told us she has back pain from mopping the floor but the husband did not help her.i was thinking her husband very lucky leh to have marry her.i dun even treat my husband to that extent.lol.For me I feel that we women should set some standards.so that the men can get used to doing the stuff.sometimes being too nice to them they took for granted.
 
For sahm, do you or yr husband give the wife's parents allowance?

I would think it's not compulsory for the husband to give allowance to the wife family.if he gives it would be a bonus to the in laws.for the daughter,she can give allowance within her financial limit.for sahm,if she do have extra money to spare,she can give a token to her parents.im sure her parents will understand.
 

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