Child Adoption

Bells,

The first vaccination was done at the clinic my agent brought our baby to for medical checkup. My baby did not take his first jab back home so he took his first vaccination in Singapore. I did not continue with the same doctor because the fee they charge is rather high.

I delayed my boy's second vaccination because he developed rashes. I did not take him to Polyclinic because he is not a citizen so I doubt we get any subsidy.

I brought him to a GP near my place for vaccine.

How old is your little one?
 


Bells,

Mine 1st check up same as Project A its at AMK SBCC Singapore Baby Child Clinic. This is the agent recommended but i haven go for his 2month jab 3 more week before he turn 2 month. Maybe i can choose a baby clinic near my place too.... AMK need to drive abit too far lolx!!!
 
Hi All,

Just to share my experience:-

My bb girl is now 6 months & just got the court adoption order approved today, lawyer will be submitting the application to ICA for her birth cert. Overjoy!!

Before my bb girl came over, I asked my vietnam agency to arrange for a health medical examination at a reputable hospital & bring the booklet along when the bb arrive in Singapore. She didnt get her injection when she was one month old. When she came to Singapore when she was 1.5 months, I quickly booked an appointment for her injection at polyclinic (near my house). Polyclinic will not bother whether your child is Singaporean or non-Singaporean, the charges of the injection is the same (only difference is if your child is Singaporean, some of the injection can claim through medisave). Her 6-in-1 injection cost me $500 plus which I'm sure the normal GP will cost more. Waiting time on the actual day for your child injection apparently do not have to wait for too long as it's done by the professional nurses.

Good Luck to all parents!
 
Esther : my first court hearing is today. How long it took u from first court hearing for your second ? So happy for u too

Project A: my bb coming 4 mths next week but he has only taken bcg n hep b n I just received the translated copy of his injections last Sunday n when we went poly clinic was told the appt given is July 5th.. But I was told that only poly clinic can update the injections taken in foreign country as they will call up the other country hospital for verification is it true? If don't need than I will just take bb to pvt clinic... Saw on the health book still hv quite a few jab ... Urgghhh...

Another thing that is getting me real worried my baby have been practicing turning into crawling position! Most times he gets stuck cause one hand is stuck near his tummy aft turning. I hv been observing him n he is soooooo persistent !!! I so worried now still dare not close my eyes to sleep! He can lift his head but he's bad at turning to one side so when he gets tired he cries.. But sometimes can so so soft cause his mouth is near the matteress .. How ah... :mad: I stressed out after I see him practicing! Can pm me solution since it's not related to adoption thread .... Thanks mummies

Wendy : yeah loh better pick one near your place cause still hv lots more jabs to go
 
Hi Bell,

It took me about a month plus after first court hearing.

When i went polyclinic, i just have to show them the origin country booklet (translated in English version) & polyclinic still need me to buy the polyclinic version of health booklet (from here they contiune the jab). They will not call the origin country, you will need to feed the information to them. If not sure, check with your agency.
 
Dear All,

Have been a silent reader of this thread all this while. Admire all of you!

I just failed my 3rd fresh ivf recently. Although I am supposed to plan for my FET. I am filled with a lot of fear. I am not sure why. Probably I know it will not be successful again. I am very demoralised by 3 unsuccessful fresh ivfs and a miscarriage (conceived naturally). All these have affected my morale so much that I am very pessimistic.

I have always been open to adoption. Just would like to find out, for you all who were pursuing fertility treatment options, when and why do you decide to stop and adopt? Were you and your husband open to adoption all along? If not, why and when did the attitude change?

Brought up the subject of adoption with my husband but he is not receptive. He said we can still be happy with just the 2 of us. However, I really long for a baby to love, cherish and nurture, I got depressed whenever I think of a future without a baby. Conceiving is really almost impossible for me. Adoption seems like the way for me to realise my dream.

The ttc and baby subject is affecting me so much that I couldn't concentrate at work. The first thought that came to my mind when I wake up in the morning is ttc.

Hope you can share your adoption journey. Thanks.
 
Hi Dana
u remind of old days
sad.gif

everyday morning...seeing kids walkby to the primary school/ parents dropping their kids at childcare...i have cried my heart out.

very much wholeheartedly tried 2 rounds of ICSI/ 3 rounds of IUI...all super duper flopped
sad.gif


then we decided to keep a BIG fullstop. very clearly we discussed about our past & future...all thanks to vivocity ( the rooftop-stairs that face sentosa)..we sat there (so that either of us don't loose our composure & we could see kids playing)
came to a conclusion..instead of paying the medical bills that might not bring any kind of benefit...why not use $ on the adoption process..so that for sure at the end of the tunnel..we'll be holding a 50cm cute lil soul that's gonna transform us...

My adoption language may not be correct or I may not sound like someone who wanted to give life for a less fortunate soul...I just wrote from my heart after reading ur post @dana
 
Thanks, mrs ha!

I am grateful for your sharing. I also think like you. Why continue to waste hard-earned money on non-effective procedures and stress ourselves out? Instead, this money will be very meaningful if a lovely child can join us in our family.

One question. Did both you and your husband have any reservations about adoption? If yes, what? Thanks.

My mood was so affected yesterday that I decided that I needed to talk. So, I bought up the adoption topic to my husband again. Surprisingly, he was not that negative. He acknowledged that his feelings are not as intense as me but he will try to understand. He will also give the issue some more thoughts.

I felt relieved to get it off my chest and am now waiting patiently for my husband to consider
happy.gif
 
thanks karen fr the link.
how about ladies with successful adoption? how long did it roughly take? is it true that couples must be married for 5 years before applying for adoption?
 
Hi Dana,

Hugs to you. I know this is a difficult time for you but you come at the right place. Most of us have gone thru infertility too and we can relate to you. Like you, I became tired of all the treatments and realized one day that I just wanted to be a mum and adoption was the way i will achieve my dream. I am so glad we went thru this route and if you read the past threads, you will read that adoption has touched many of us. I can't imagine my life any other ways now.

As regards to your question about your hubby, it took more time for my hubby to warm up to the idea too. So, just be patient with your hubby. He needs to digest the idea. One good way to start is to attend adoption workshop by Touch.
 
Hi dream,

Thanks for your reply.

Actually I have been reading this thread silently since my 2nd ivf which is about 1.5 years ago. I believe adoption is a beautiful way of completing the family too.

Relieved to hear that your hubby also took some time to warm up to the idea. I shall wait patiently too. Yes, will look into attending the adoption workshop.

How old is(are) your kid(s) now?
 
Hi Dana,
So, it seems you are 1.5 year " ahead" of your hubby as this has crossed your mind when you were doing your second IVF. For him, it is a "new" idea and it is a very important decision, especially in our society which is not so open on adoption. So, you need to "educate" him slowly on it.
 
Thanks, Dream.

Yup, I have been thinking about it since 1.5 years ago. Bought up to my hubby but he was not comfortable.

Ironically, my hubby has an adopted sister whom everyone in the family adores. Nonetheless, she went through a challenging time in her youth due to identity crisis. She is never told that she is adopted. Appearance wise, she is quite different from the rest of the siblings and has endured numerous questionings from frens and strangers etc.

My hubby works with children and youths. He has met youths who are adopted and are very rebellious after they knew their parentage. My hubby felt that it is not healthy for the adopted kids. For me, I believe in being open. While society is not open to adoption, we need to treat it normally and not something shameful which we have to hide from.

Yes, I think my hubby needs time. He has no patience to read forum threads but I think adoption workshop will probably help.

I think there are 2 issues which are bothering him. Non-biological ties and appropriate handling of disclosure so that the kid's psychological well-being is not compromised.
 
Your hubby is right and I feel that these are the 2 key issues that adoptive parents face. These issues are interlinked and how we react to them will influence their identity. It seems that your SIl identity crisis may be due to The fact that she was missing that last piece of a jigsaw puzzle.

Nowadays, disclosure is encouraged at an early age though there are contrasting views as well on this. Touch organizes workshops and seminars on disclosure to help parents.

Adoption has its challenges/issues but these issues are overshadowed by the joy that the child brings to your life. Once you hold your little bundle of joy in your arm, all your fears and worries will vanish. And your life will be forever changed. Good luck
 
Yup, my sil's identity crisis was probably due to the doubts about her parentage. Everyone in the family (including brothers' wives) knows the truth, yet she is still being kept in the dark. Over the years, she probably has guessed but never got her confirmation. Now, I think she has moved on.

Thanks.
 
Esther and Tub, I'm confused, if it's through foster home, why do we still need to go through an agency? Agency being the middle person will definitely mark up the charges big time!

Previously, with some luck and blessings and connection, we found our little girl locally too. We pay a lawyer to do the paper work, ang pow to the biological mum to boost her health after birth, hosp. delivery charges, etc. Total spent is only abt. 13k.

Not sure if you still need to go through an agency and spent extra $$$?
 
Hi,

I am new here... have been reading this thread and am very encouraged by all of your sharings... thanks so much.

I would like to find out if anyone has adopted a baby and brought the baby to China to stay with you... how soon can you do that? Can you make the birth cert and the passport here in China? That means are you able to bring the baby in with the original passport and the adoption order?
 
Hi everyone! I'm new here too.. Have been reading this thread all the while too.. Am glad this thread is so active! When I submitted my HSR application more than 2 months ago, Touch told me there is a long queue and I should expect to wait up till 5 months to get my report! On one hand, glad that more people are thinking like us now and on the other, I can't wait to reach the end of this process too
happy.gif


Like to seek some last min advice :p We are attending our first interview at Touch next week! Can anyone tell me how will the process be like and what type of questions they will ask? Will there be any individual sessions i.e. the assessor will talk to only one of us at a time? Coz I tot 3 hours is pretty long.. Just like to be better prepared for this!

Thanks in advance!! Looking forward to more sharing in this thread!
 
@min21
Welcome to the thread!!!!!!!!

you'll interviewed based on your HSR application form. (Learn/ read all the stuffs that you have written in it atleast a hundred times)

There'll be a session together based on the common part of the application form. then separate interview sessions based on the individual portions from the HSR form.

all the best. hope this helps!!!!
happy.gif

PM if u need more help..Will be glad to help
happy.gif
 
Hi all,

I've just started on my adoption journey, which has not been easy but I happen to find this thread online and it has been immensely helpful and encouraging!

I've just submitted my HSR and now waiting to be assessed. In the meantime, I've been trying to find out where do people adopt their babies from and how have their experiences been?

My hubby and I are open to local and foreign adoption but we are more inclined towards local. Could I ask if anyone has adopted locally before? Has anyone adopted through Project Cherub before?

I understand these questions might have been asked umpteen times before. But will be grateful if anyone is willing to share their experiences either through this thread or PM me.

Many thanks!
CC
 
congrats on taking the first step of an exciting journey! project cherub has a longgggggg waiting time (if i'm not wrong it's 1.5 to 2 years)

if you do come across Amman, please be wary of their claims (on having local babies). My wife and I had an extremely bad experience when dealing with them
 
Hi Andrew,

Thanks very much for your response. Much appreciated!

Yes I understand the waiting time could be long for project cherub. It has been quite hard getting them on the phone so I haven't been able to find out much. But of course will nail them down for more info and waiting time once the HSR is done.

Thanks a lot for your warning on Amman.

CC
 
i also have bad experience on local baby if u read earlier thread i adopted a local baby girl but the mother take her back and "Sell" to other ppl that can offer higher $. I heard from my other frds that her relative adopted a local baby too... but until now the birth parent on and off keep pester them for money. So to my point of view local baby are more hassle. Especially the birth parent is always in need of money. From day one once they give birth normally they will still want to see the baby and chance of them last min pull hand brake is very normal. And their BC number will never change from it... so if they really want to find the kid still can find as SG is pretty small... Go to moe can check which sch they are studying in can le... just my 2 cents worth

thats y after my 1st sad incident i go for malaysia baby. more safer... Pricing from Local to Foreign baby to me no diff end up local baby need to pay more. =)
 
Mary IF they say it's required, than just tell them u can just purchase one immediately. Suggest that u casually ask the counsellor about their concerns whether it will affect anything. Usually they will tell, cause they also want us to be able to get our HSR. They are generally very nice people cause they also understand our predicaments n they are there to help not destroy us loh...
 
Hi ladies
happy.gif

good to see the thread active, on many headings relating to adoption.

@maryneo
I believe the point that's stressed for having a life policy, according to me, could be $$ guaranteed for the baby after the parents (the baby need not suffer much). If we could provide them with any such source of $$, other than life policy, they might accept it.( i guess so...u better check with touch or the org with which u r gonna do ur HSR - like how bellsbells said)

@cc
If you are looking for a local baby, i believe the queue is quite long & i believe, yourself, like many others in the group(incl me), could have come to this point a lil late after trying to get one of your own. (i apologise if that's not the situation) Given such a situation, if i were you, i wouldn't wait in the queue for a couple of years to have one. I would just jump to the international baby adoption queue, wherein i can have a baby soon after your HSR completion.
 
Hi,

I just had my HSR approved. May I know what documents do I need to prepare for the following :
1. Starting the search with the agencies.
2. MCYS
3. Application for DP
3. Legalisation
. Adoption Order
. Birth Cert
. Citizenship
. Passport
(Did I miss out any steps?!?)

At which point do we need to have the name we planned for our child ready?

I am currently overseas so hope to get all these documents ready and bring back to Singapore once and for all. Really appreciate if anyone can help me with these questions... Thanking in advance!
 
Hi,

I just had my HSR approved. May I know what documents do I need to prepare for the following :
1. Starting the search with the agencies.
2. MCYS
3. Application for DP
3. Legalisation
. Adoption Order
. Birth Cert
. Citizenship
. Passport
(Did I miss out any steps?!?)

At which point do we need to have the name we planned for our child ready?

I am currently overseas so hope to get all these documents ready and bring back to Singapore once and for all. Really appreciate if anyone can help me with these questions... Thanking in advance!
 
Hi,

I just had my HSR approved. May I know what documents do I need to prepare for the following :
1. Starting the search with the agencies.
2. MCYS
3. Application for DP
3. Legalisation
. Adoption Order
. Birth Cert
. Citizenship
. Passport
(Did I miss out any steps?!?)

At which point do we need to have the name we planned for our child ready?

I am currently overseas so hope to get all these documents ready and bring back to Singapore once and for all. Really appreciate if anyone can help me with these questions... Thanking in advance!
 
So sorry for the multiple postings... my line was a bit cranky last night so I pressed a couple of <enter> =D
And when I check back today, the system does not allow me to delete the extra postings already! =P
 
Hey friends, trying to help my relatives with some info... They've already located a 6yo child with dependent pass, currently studying in S'pore.

Anyone has any reasonably priced lawyer to recommend, roughly how much to do adoption paper work? Need not be established popular lawyers, just decent 'reliable' one will do. Thanks!
 
Hello everyone!!!

I am new here... After 2 failed IVF tries after an etocpic pregnancy... We have decided to go into the adoption route..
But I have no idea where and how to start.

We have discussed this ( suggested by hubby) with 2 tries of IVF ( I can't take the emotional and physical stress)

We are open to Malaysian ( any agencies to recommend) and Vietnam babies.

Anyone can share!!????

Thank you
 
Hello undecided....

No I have not started anything.... But can I know what is e 1st step?
I have called Apkim to get a date for a briefing..( what's that for?)
Then subsequently then can get HSR.
 
Hi babyjul28,thanks for your info.Actually we dun look to adopt a new born baby but may 2 to 3yr old child and i check with mcys they do have older chil for adoption so that mean is it we can straight adopt it immediately.
 
Is PAB means Pre adoption briefing??
Mine will be on the 15th sept.

Anyone has comments about any agencies?
I am getting my HSR from Apkim.
 
Hello everyone, DCK, Mary, Bensonho, all the best on your journey.

Getting your home study report done is part of your first step. Have you attended a pre-adoption workshop to see if it's a route you are comfortable with? Touch and Fei Yue both organise such talks. You will find them very enlightening and assuring especially when you have recently made the decision to adopt.

Getting your HSR done will take time and also allows you to ask around for contacts.

Let me assure you that this journey will be a long but no doubt rewarding one and your baby will find you... not quite the other way round... as testified by many fellow adoptive parents.

All the best,

Andrea
 
DCK : i opted for Lutheren community services as their queue was shorted when i was doing my HSR. You may want to call up all those listed on MCYS website and get them to give you an estimate on the time frame from submission of full set documents to your first interview. Base on that quicky get all documents ready as its quite alot of documents required. pick the one with the shorter queue. i called feiyue and the counsellors straight away ask me to use other agencies as they have quite alot of cases. so thanks for their honesty also .... ;)

Me too have my failed IVFs... and when baby came over i also had ectopic preggy ... sign.. i alreaedy have 2 babies miscarried at 5 months so really sad loh... but am really glad i made the choice of adoption too. Now with my little baby it's really lovely. Very soon you will have yours too ;)

Things will happen very fast once you have your HSR report and the next thing you know you lovely little baby is with you ;)

Dear all sisters. Please pray for me too.. mcys coming to my place 6 august for writing report for final court order. urrghh.. what will they ask us anyone can share?
hmm... me getting nervous leh..
 
Hi Andrea.thanks for the well wishes.Can i check with you when previous you done ur hsr,did they ask u to have ur criminal check at cantonment police complex.
 


Hi BellsBells, the home visit by MCYS is quite ok. The person will probably ask you similar questions about your marriage when you did HSR as well as how your life is different now that you have your baby, how you maintain your couple relationship, ask you about how you look after baby, the different roles you and your partner play as parents etc. They will also check that your house is child safe. All the best and don't worry about it!
 
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