A leopard never changes its spots.
I caught my ex trying to start an affair with an old school friend about 8 years ago, when I was home on hospitalization leave. Fortunately, the OW knew he was married and the affair barely started. He swore it was a mistake and would never happen again. That he was angry cos all his leave was taken to see me in hospital and never to have "fun". As we already had two young children and I had medical problems and was already in danger of losing my job, I forgave him and we moved on.
Fast forward through more hospitalizations, my severe depression, and our third child being born...
I uncovered more affairs. He'd just gotten better at hiding them. So I just had to get better at uncovering them.
I went after every woman, via sms and calls. They all eventually left him, after learning he was a married man with three children.
He just got bolder. He didn't care any more.
This last one, a local uni grad, chose to stick by him. Poor fool.
Anyway, he insisted on a divorce and I gave it to him. To skip the sordid details, let's just say there was more than enough evidence that he wanted me out of his life... he said wanted to be a bachelor again. (which is kinda strange considering that he's marrying his latest mistress)
When this whole thing exploded three years ago, they were upset. They are now in upper primary, the youngest is five. They don't understand why papa had girlfriends and now is marrying one of them. I have to reinforce morals - that it is wrong to lie (yes he lied to them, many many times) that a married man does not have girlfriends and certainly should never abandon his children.
The middle boy hated me. He thought I chased his papa away. I'm still struggling with him daily though fortunately, he is starting to see his father for the heartless moron that he is.
Children can sense when things are not right. We seldom give them enough credit. Now that we are settled down as a household of mom and children, I dare say we are much happier and more at peace than before. Before the arguments and the open affairs, before the silent hidden affairs and disgruntled father even.
My five year old used to cry at night for his father. Now when he sees him, he just goes "oh. hi papa" and walks off. He has adapted.
Give him a chance? Sure. But when he is the fool, don't you make yourself the fool too.