(2005/04) Apr/May/June 2005 MTB


elaine,
very nice pics... u even in specs oso pretty lah... agree wif san that u r even slimmer than me who has delivered 6 mths ago!!! sad...

angel,
thanks for helping me to order... i realise wearing binder really helps cos my neighbour who has juz finished her confinement n her tummy is smaller than mine!!! faint...
 
valmom,

same here! S frequently have constipation even though I gave him vege liao
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He dun like fruits too. There was once not too long back he strained till there is substantial blood in his "output". My mum will use enema on him at times...
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If you all got any good solutions or supplement for constipation, please let me know also...

re: cc

these last 2 days, S still cry when I bring him to the cc. He will cling on to me and said he wanna go out when I bring him. Then started asking for ah ma (my mum). I felt a bit sad cos maybe he feels I had abandoned him or let him down by sending him into the cc.... and thus he wants my mum...

anyway, last 2 days, when I reached, he would be participating in the activities and eating his lunch all by himself. When I appear, he will cry... but today, he cry for abt 1 minute only.. then start to hi-five with the teachers and smile before going home. On the way home, he will still asked what are the teachers doing. His teachers told me that he will tell them about cars, buses, his violin and asked where is mummy.

hmm .. his teachers took some video snippets using the camera we passed to them... but in the video, there are tears in his eyes leh.. look like he just cried... and he dun look that happy... a little moody.... I cant really confirm whether he likes it there or not....
 
<font color="aa00aa">valmom:
oh... maybe must change milk formula? i know iron causes constipation ... could it be that the iron content is too high?

</font>
 
Angel,
Thanks for helping me order. There's something wrong with my Internet Trf... will try again later and inform you when I'm done k?
 
Angel,

Can you pls help to include me in the next order? I am tempted too!
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Poohy,
Let me share Caden's experience with 3-hr programme at his CC. This is already his 3rd week in school and each day, he will cry as he stepped out of my MIL's house (cos start at 9am) and when my MIL picks him up from school, he will be found crying as well.. wonder how long he cries in school each day.. no choice lah, have to be heartless.. we are planning to see how it goes in 1.5months time.. if everyday still cry like that, something must be wrong with the teacher or environment right? My MIL told me today that the teacher said wants to give us a call.. not sure if she is throwing in the towel to say that she doesn't know what to do or whatever.. but I know that she complaint to my MIL that another toddler turned up at the centre a couple of days ago have already settled down.. how can she make such comparison??? different child has different needs mah...
 
Constance just started full day playgroup and today would be her 4th day. My problem is that she cry because she had to go home at the end of the day instead. She enjoys going to school a lot. Funny child. I bet she will pretend to be sick when she enters primary school rather than looking forward to it hehehe

Valmom,
I know some mommy don't agree on giving tod cold food or ice cream but this is what we did. We blend the fruits and freeze it. Then make it like ice kacang and Constance will not only finish it she will ask for more.. it is like eating ice cream. After eating "ice fruit" and she knows fruit is nice we just give her fresh fruits now.
 
morning all....
Gerald had diaranne yesterday... school call... rush to the school... send him to the doc.... then reach home... sleeping... in the evening.. need to send him back to my mother place.... my brother came n fetch us... send me to school.... then Gerlad cry like a baby.... so heart broken.... haiz..... that is life of FTWM.....

Hi Hytten,
Good for u......

Hi Poohy...
it take a while... .Gerald took 3 week before stop crying ... .though now he still not very keen in going to school but at least he would not cry like before...

Hi Angeline,
U all talk about the blinder so good.... wait till next year, i will buy lor.... haha.... now buy also can not use.....
 
blueberry,

ya... the teacher shd not make comparison..
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Different children have different character... just like hytten's constance totally loved the idea of going to her playgroup. I know it takes a while.... sigh.. I am under a lot of pressure from home too... cos most of them cannot comprehend why I send S to school so young cos most of the kids in the family start school earliest at 4 years old. One of my cousin went to N2 and cry .... and by 2nd day, my aunt went in to bring him out and quit the school.
 
poshies,

ya i know it takes a while.... now my mum asking me whether shd stop the playgroup and then restart in jan08 for the N1 class since there will be a change of teachers plus we will be going on 1.5 weeks holiday in end dec.... scared will make him cry all over again.... she feels might as well start in jan and cry just once... :p But its already 2nd week for S in playgroup... so I am worried if we stop now, like last 1.5 weeks wasted ..

I also wondering if I shd get my mum to go and fetch S home after 2 hours (though his class is 3.5 hours) so as to help him adjust... One concern here would be that we will be sending him to class in the morning and if its my mum who fetches him, he will think of us as monsters sending him off!
 
<font color="0000ff">blueberry</font>
Agree with Poohy, how can the teacher make such a comparison.. so impatient.

<font color="119911">Poohy</font>
There is no 'right' age to send the child to school one lah. Just becoz they cry then u withdraw them from school I think it's a tact too protective. So by the time it's Pri 1 and her child cry = quit pri sch?

Everyone needs time to adapt. As adults we can handle our emotions better so wouldn't cry. The anxiety is still there (e.g change job, shift house etc). For the child, he/she is incapable of supressing this anxiety (coz dunno the place, dunno whether my parents will come pick me up, dunno who these pple are etc etc etc), thus will cry. It's perfectly normal.

They need time to settle in and need assurance from us that it's ok. So rather than looking anxious and worried yourself, just keep reminding him of the activities he enjoy in school, the friends that he has etc. Dun keep asking him "U want to goto school?". It'll give him an impression that you urself is questioning ur decision. If u are not even sure, how to give the child the assurance? Just continuously assure him that someone will come pick him up later.

Hope this helps.
 
<font color="0000ff">poohy</font>
Actually I personally find to create a 'whoo-ha' out of the issue only accentuates his anxiety. If the class is 3.5hrs, then he stays for 3.5hrs. It'll allow him to u/stand that every child is to follow the same routine. He'll observe what other children is doing and do the same. This is how teachers in the school handle so many kids.. coz everyone is treated the same way. If you affect this equilibrium by bringing him home early, not only will he not follow the routine (coz he'll think I'm special mah), it can cause other children to demand special treatment also.
 
valmom,

ya agree with u... thats why I am also hesitant to do that. I dun want him to get the wrong idea and also to affect other children. Last 2 days, we went slightly early to the class to pick him up... the teachers told us we can pick him up at 11:45am if skip lunch. But when we reached there, seeing him eating lunch with the rest... we din interrupt... just stood outside out of his sight and wait for him to finish.
 
hi poohy,
personaly i don think it is good for your mummy to bring S earlier.... then he will take it that is the correct timing.... give him a bit more time.... children is super fast in adjusting to the new evironment.......

Re: Confinement Lady...
hi all... just need advise if i'm getting a maid... u think i still need to get a confinement lady???
 
poshies
can your maid cook? or will your mum/MIL help to cook for you? If not, then you may need a CL. but on the other hand, must consider as your xtra "cost" will be high with Maid + CL

poohy
ya, I think you need to give S some time to settle down in his new environment.

Angel
$ transferred and pm-ed u yesterday, thanks a mil
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Weddings!! Yar i have 2 in Oct, 1 in Nov and 2 in Dec. Will go broke.

Heh SC, i read ur blog, guess wat, i also jus cut away my long hair to bob few days back.

Poshies... i got maid, MIL and CL. Decided to opt 4 the easier but more costly way out to reduce my stress level and make life easier at least for the 1st mth. CL must be good and tested out one. Go for one tt others rec. i had some "problems" with my maid and CL. MIL does the marketing for us. And we also spent A LOT on marketing for confinement food. So i think in retrospect... i think... if u have a maid (who is settled in and good), perhaps can consider just ordering tingkat confinement food.

Blueberry, did you try to sneak and monitor from aside how Cay is in CC for 1-2 days? How's the sch like? Yar lor some kids may take a longer time to settle in. Hope Cay settles in soon. So poor thing. Then u also giving birth soon right?

Angel, ohhh the order too full har? Aiyah if not i can request 2 lombang SC to help me collect, heh. It's ok lor. Any difference if i order thru' the BP directly?
 
hi poohy....
yup ... be positive....

hi ming,
thanks.... u think when i should start looking for a maid???? hmm..... i have a big fight with my mil on my 1st day home without gerald the other time..... as that time my CL only come on the next day.... so i'm abit lost on how should the planning be... as i know good CL need to book early..... and i only need a CL in the day time... i know i can cope with the bb at night...
 
Ming/Blueberry,
My friend told me that her spree really up to the brim already. She will take in both of your orders next week, when she start new spree. Ok with both of you?
 
Ming,
What kind of 'problem' you had with your maid ah?! You know, sometimes I wish I don't have a maid like mine..... can sing to Joeson, play with Joeson and even take care of his everything very well. So well that Joeson is so close to her right now. Joeson close to MIL I don't mind lei. Joeson close to maid, I freak out man. Moreover, she also spend alot of time singing to Anson. How much time I am away from home, and how much time she has with him. Who will Anson take to more?! Sometimes feel so helpless...... Maybe I should pick on her being so free. Nothing to do hor?! Make her do more housework so she don't have that much time to sing to Anson. 'Hiak hiak hiak'... devil horns.
 
<font color="0000ff">angelneo</font>
Good maid also complain, bad maid also complain :p

Better be good than bad. At least u know Joeson & Anson are in loving hands.. better than worry at work what ur maid is doing to ur children..
 
angel,

wow... your maid sounds really good!!! Let me know if u think of transfering her hehee... in case I want a maid. but I understand your anxiety... sigh working mothers always has this dilemma, want the caregiver to love our child as much as we do, but scared kena snatched away from us hehee ... wish we can be like the men.... they dun seemed to feel much whether they are no.1 or no.4 in the kids' heart.
 
Poshies,
I learnt from a friend's experience that it is better to get a confinement maid than go for tingkat even if you have a maid.

My friend had a maid 2 mths before she delivered her 2nd kid. She ordered tingkat confinement food and thought that since she has a maid, she doesn't need a CL.

After she delivered, her maid told her that she was not comfortable in handling newborn... In the end, she has to handle the newborn herself... resulting in not enough rest and nearly depression... This experience is so bad that she is stopping at 2 no matter wat.

My view is that even though the maid might be capable of handling a newborn, I would prefer to hand the newborn to a professional for the 1st mth... the professional (CL) will then impart her skills to the maid... at least during confinement, I have no worries... I hope.

My confinement period falls nicely near the CNY... so gotta fork out more for the CL... a bit heartpain as well...
 
Angel,

My maid can also sing and play with my girl... sometimes it hurt when she says "BB wants to play with auntie" when i offered to play with her.

I guess this is unavoidable... we are all working mums....

At least I know that the maid cares for my girl and she will not harm my girl

I think most likely I won't want to renew her contract when it expires 1 1/2 year later... don't want the kids to get too attached to her.
 
ming,
oh u oso cut hair... hehehe... now thinking of trimming it shorter cos my hair ends is curling at the wrong directions... sigh... where got time to blow my hair nice nice every morning??
 
Poshies,
I agree with Carla. It will be more manageable to have a confinement lady who is more professional in handling bbs. For me, my mom did my confinement but she was so tied up with cooking and taking care of cay that she didn't have time to handle bbcay. In the end, I handle bbcay alone most of the time during the day and every night. It was very tough especially during the first two weeks when my back hurt really bad and the wound has yet to heal.

My mom couldn't help at night because cay will stick to her and will wake up in the middle of the night to make sure my mom was there. Also, I want my mom rest well because the next day she has to take care of cay, cooking, housework and help out with bbcay.
 
I agree its better to get a confinement lady even if you have a maid. Even if the maid is able to handle the newborn, they may not be doing it the way we want. I asked my CL to teach my maid how to handle Kayla even though my maid has 4 kids. We observed that my maid is quite rough in handling Kayla at first. So my CL told her how to do things correctly. My CL also taught my maid to cook many dishes. Now my maid can cook very well.

I could bring Keane out to spend some quality time with him while my CL and maid were at home looking after Kayla. If only maid at home with Kayla, I will not fang xin to go out liao.
 
Ming/Sc
both you cut bob as well? Me too. SC seen before but she didn't realise is a bob hehe cos' it is not those obvious concave bob. Gd & bad wz this style. I am very happy wz my short hair now cos' so easy to maintain after wash. As i reach home late everyday, i am at least not that stress cos' i know it will dry fast. Rather then wz my long curl which takes hours to dry. Only 1 bad thing about short hair i.e, got to trim it 1s every 1.5 to 2 mths. Long hair can tahan few mths. And this sunday, I am going for my 3rd trim!
 
san,
i know yours is a bob lah... almost wanna sms u to ask how u maintain your hair until so nice... mine curling in the wrong directions... very messy n ugly... but it certain helps to solve my shedding hair problem...

now thinking if i shld go n rebond to make it straight so that it wun curl the wrong direction!!!
 
<font color="aa00aa">SC, Meow,</font>

I also tempted to cut my hair to bob when i nursing thavis cos so hot. but i so hiao.. Think wanna cut i also wanna cry. Cos now waist length very sayang. ahahha.
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<font color="119911">Angel,</font>

your maid is good man! ahaha/ Mine is liek forever passing bb back to me. But good in the sense that if she leaves, none of them will look for her. ahaha.

<font color="ff0000">CArla, Poshies,</font>

Think 1st month hor I dun trust anyone. Better take care yourself. not even CL. Moreover if nursing then bb sleep beside you enough ma. then the diaper and all put nearby. If need you change. Then ask maid come and help clear up after every 2 hours or something while she bring you drinks and food. For me I heng cos hubby took lotsa leave almost everyday at home for at least half day. He cook me the confinement drink in the morning and some food. If he got meeting he teach the maid how to do. So i just feed and change and sleep with baby. very fast 1 mth over one la.

<font color="0077aa">Poohy,</font>

I think we should practice caution abt giving in to the whims of the child. My brother was rescued from N1 cos he cried too much. Parents thought, hmm maybe he's too young, give him some time to get used to the idea. in the end he N2 also dun want. Scream and scream. My parents thought give him some time K1 should be better. Same story so they thought never mind K2 should be ok. Then every time he screams and act pathetic, they withdraw him. So in the end he did not have any formal education til Primary 1. And he was enrolled into maris stella. Then he couldn't cope with the normal curriculum cos everyone could read and write somewhat by then but he has been at home in the care of the maid. To cut my loh soh story short, I think my parents taught my brother that as long as he throw enough tantrums, act pathetic enough, he can get his way.

This is not to say everyone will end up like him but I think we should decide what we want and be firm about it. If you think N1 ain;t necessary, then dun enrol him in the first place. If you think N1 is good cos it gives him the exposure earlier and gives him an edge over his peers then you have to be firm about it. Kids thrive best with consistency and we need to try our best to provide them that for them to learn the rules.

If it is any comfort to you, Thyler took more than a month to stop crying and standing at the door screaming for me. I went to peep at him more than once a day and it broke my heart to see him in that state. He was inside the classroom crying for me while i was outside the classroom shedding tears and all the while wanting to go in and carry him home. But I got to be firm. So after that 6 weeks he stopped crying and taking part in arts and crafts. And 3 mths for him to talk to anyone and make friends and take part in class discussions. But i am glad i made that decision cos I feel that he is more confident about himself. When i peep at him now, I beam with pride when I see him standing in front of the class telling story with a book.
 
hi all..
thanks for the advise... haha suppose to be in my class... now in lib..... hee hee... will talk to hubby after next friday....
 
sc,
i never did anything. everyday was my hair and blow dry. didn't even comb. long or short or curl, me same type of maintenance. haha. but u should remember i was perm hair before my cut so of cos' i rebond it first before cutting. but abit tricky on rebonding for a bob as it can't afford to be flat. And i color my hair 'blue black' as well so look abit shine lah but now its back to my original black so i find abit dull. But my coll wz bob, she nvr rebond also ok. cos' her hair alot and thick so she did abit like concave bob which thick hair is ok. hers those quite short type so will not curl around leh.

so now everyday washing hair a breeze right? me too thot i will shed lesser hair after cut but me still shed alot leh. the hair on the floor not any lesser.
 
Poohy,

I agree with the rest not to cut short S's time in school.. i did that for Caden, initially i signed him up for 5hr programme, then change to 3 hr, now, he knows when its time to go home, my MIL told us that she went early to peeped at him today he was found crying without tears while sitting in front of the bathroom while the full-day kids take turns to shower.. (shower time starts at 1130)and he continued to do so till 1150 until my MIL cannot take it and rescue him out..

Ming,

I did spent full-time with C on his first day and half time with him on his second day.. he cried a big time the moment he found me missing on day 2 till he fell asleep... yah, i am giving birth soon.. hopefully he is able to settle down fast otherwise, i am afraid that he will feel that we abandon him in CC becos of his lil brother..

Angeline,

I am fine with the wait.. don't think i will use so soon...

Wen, based on T's experience.. i think i can also go as far as 6 weeks to see how it goes now...least your experience motivates me to let go too..
 
sc, ming, san
I also cut my hair to a bob right after my confinement. After that my hair curl so much that I went for rebonding 2 weeks before I started work. Keke... Now it's neat and straight. morning wake up don't comb also can.
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zyp,san
so rebonding will do the trick?? hmm... then i hv to consider to go rebond liao... when i hv long hair, i no need to rebond but short hair must go rebond... a bit funny... sigh... better dun let hubby knows... later he sure jump...

btw i seldom comb my hair when i hv long hair cos i tie it up, now i comb my hair more often than before cos of the curls loh....

wen,
u sure u wan to cut?? your hair so long, cut liao very sayang leh... all along i wanted to change my hairstyle but always no guts... dunno y tat day i hv the courage to cut... hehehehe...
 
San,ming,sc
me too, I cut my hair short since June tis year. But till now I din go and trim my hair. So far I still find it ok. "ke yi jian ren"
I also wash hair everyday and dry very fast. But my hair still dropping leh. Sometimes I can feel the hair js drop off and fall onto my shoulder...haiz...dun knw wat to do..i thk very fast i will become botak.
 
batman,
tt's the main reason y i cut my hair... my hair shed until very scary... wash hair will shed tons, put conditioner oso will shed, dry hair can see hair falling from the towel to the floor and comb hair is even worse... entire brush covered wif hair... my hubby oso very pissed cos he kept picking my hair from the floor/bed and etc...

btw my gynae recommend the supplement pilfood... oso comes in shampoo form... i din try lah cos lazy to go pharmacy to buy...
 
mummies,

thanx for all your advices
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I had decided to put S in the LW preschool and not look back. This morning, my mum carried him and passed him to the teachers on their way to sand play and she told me he did not cry out loud... just sob. I waved bye to him and we went off.

sweatcorn,

I take pilfood too after my delivery... my gynae recommended it. I am not sure how effective it is cos when I was taking it the other time, not too long later I was preggie with J and so not sure whether that affects the hormone and the hair stop falling.
 
hi all...
haha then should i cut my hair now....

hi poohy,
it take times lah... Gerald cry for 3 weeks... now he is okie... this morning he told my mother he want to take his toy gun to go n bang his teacher... faint.... he will wave goodbye to my mother....
 
<font color="0000ff">poohy</font>
Good for u! Coz if u keep having an internal struggle also v hard for S to settle in.
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<font color="119911">Poshies</font>
we have to remind V to say & wave bye-bye coz she'll CHIONG into the centre!! Now she is learning to remove her own shoes mah (slow I know.. ) and she'll put the shoes onto the rack. So she being v slow at this, when she finally got both shoes onto the rack, she basically dash into the centre!! The teacher gotta call her back to the door to say bye bye to us.. :p
 
sc,batman,zyp,ming,
all the 'ai swee' mummy here talking abt hair. wahaha.

sunday thinking of going for a trim. actually feel like changing different kind of bob style. those messy layer bob. but no guts to try if too short.
 
san,
u spend $$ to rebond then wan to hv messy layer bob?? sure anot?? mine got a bit of layer n its sure messy wif it curling out!!!
 


SC,

yea very sayang. Think i'll just wait til i finish bf then i rebond. Then sui sui straight straight. My hubby like straight straight long long hair.

Zyp,

Wah! I also want wake up dun comb hair!! sounds so shiok.

Blueberry,

That time i see Thyler like that I really at breaking point lor.
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The principal assured me 3 weeks ok liao. but thyler dragged on til 6 weeks. somemroe i work nest block. you shi mei shi I go peep. Affecting my work man. The principal also shocked at how long he took. But now i look back wah! coming 1 year in cc liao. Soon promoted to N1 liao. keekek like big boy. everything he know how to do by himself. So proud of him lor.
 

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